Interesting take on attraction by Dr. Grey

[FlyGuy]

Do you think a bunch of hot chicks sit around and write cosmo?

I don't know who writes that magazine, but I know who READS it and who it is MARKETED towards. No, its not necessarily realistic but that to me shows the kind of men that women generally find attractive. I already know what the Hairclub for men can do for me: zilch unless I want to go with a transplant. I've done a TON of research on my own and it gets down to 3 major treatments - Rogaine, Propecia, and hair transplant surgery. None of them are very good, all of them are expensive, and Rogaine/Propecia only work for the top of your head like I said before.

Hey thanks for putting up with my *****ing fellas and for trying to help out... I just don't know if there IS anything that can be done. The medical community doesn't seem to care much about curing hairloss. To tell the truth I don't care too much about it - I mean it sucks losing a part of your identity but what really bothers me is that the chicks don't dig it. Its easy to say "Don't let the opinion of a few girls jilt your confidence" but man it seems like its EVERY girl. I haven't met a single girl yet that likes it. But what can I do? Just gotta keep trying...

 

[Starman]

I find it incredibly hard to believe we've sent a man to the man, can blow up the world if we wanted, cloned all types of animals (and allegedly humans)

but we cant find a cure for baldness?

thats a little absurd.

 

[FlyGuy]

Hehe, yeah I know it IS absurd but that's the truth. People don't take baldness as serious as they should, they don't realize how much it ****s with you psychologically. Going bald has sent me into depression, caused me to let a girl walk all over me, all sorts of crap. But people don't think of it as a debilatating disease.

 

[drZaius09]

Originally posted by FlyGuy
"is a woman's company really that important?"

Yeah, it is. I can't help it, I was genetically and socially programmed to want a woman's company/sex/etc.

That answer is such a cop-out. I'm not trying to flame you, I mean, it's an easy excuse, and I've used it myself. But sometimes you have to be stronger than that, and not automatically cave-in to society's pressures and demands regardless of the cost.

"Is it so integral to our lives to find a mate that we should search and struggle for a way to improve our appearance just to get one fleeting chance at scoring with only a select group of women (the available ones)?"

Apparently it is, otherwise we wouldn't be on this site trying to change our lives around.

I don't know about you, but I'm not here to "change (my) life around" at all, especially not for the purpose of meeting women. I'm here to change my attitude; specifically my attitude toward exactly what we speak of in this topic.

If I have to go through hell to find heaven, I think it'd be worth it. The only problem is that I don't know what the outcome will be...

Exactly... you DON'T know. That's what makes your blind faith and willingness to "go through hell" so sad and tragic.

 

[mahon83050]

All these ads and commercials I see about hairloss, I beg to differ FLYGUY! BTW, look how many girls drool over Vin Diesel. Not only is he bald, but he is not handsome either. My one friend is 6'2" bald (shaves it) and has dumbo ears....he does ok for himself, is involved with a hot women right now.

 

[FlyGuy]

Sorry if you think my answer is a cop-out, but fact remains that I want a girl, a relationship, a life companion and I don't know how to kill that desire.

So what should I do then? Become a monk? I have to keep trying, and that requires me to change my life around. I don't go clubbing, I'm not very social, I'm skinny/short/wear glasses/balding, I don't like the things that most people like... if I don't change at least SOME aspects of my life I'm making it nearly impossible to find someone that is compatible with me. Since I want a girl in my life I figure I need to change some things to increase my odds. Nothin wrong with that IMO.

 

[mahon83050]

What does IMO mean?

 

[FlyGuy]

All these ads and commercials I see about hairloss, I beg to differ FLYGUY!

Beg all you want, it doesn't change reality. Most of the commercials you see are for Propecia and Rogaine. Look them up if you think I'm wrong, they are not miracle cures by any means.

And yeah... somehow all I hear about is Vin Diesel... like I said man I'm not like Vin Diesel. I don't look like him and I DEFINITELY don't have his personality (and I don't think I could change my whole personality just to emulate him even if I wanted to). I'm working out and trying to get a better body but it takes time, so I'll have to wait and see how it turns out.

 

[FlyGuy]

IMO = In My Opinion

 

[drZaius09]

If I hear one more Vin Diesel reference on these boards, I swear to christ....

"He's bald AND ugly!" Guess what, you're not a f*cking woman. You don't know what women find attractive. Obviously, they find HIM attractive, for whatever reason. Perhaps they don't see FlyGuy in the same light (I sure as hell know they don't see me that way). I guess we're all f*cking doomed. Because if I can't find some b1tch to waste my worthless life with, I just don't know what I'll do <sobs <sobs>

 

[mahon83050]

Rogaine is supposed to slow down hair loss correct? What does the other do?

 

[FlyGuy]

Fvck you man, I should apologize for being a human? Make me out to be a crybaby if you want to, I doubt you can find a person outside of religious faith who can willingly accept the prospect of never having a relationship or sexual contact with someone.

 

[FlyGuy]

Rogaine and Propecia both do basically the same thing, only through different methods. Rogaine is a topical solution - you apply it to your scalp twice a day. Propecia is a pill that you take once a day. Basically there is a certain type of testosterone (dyhydrotestosterone, or DHT) that for some men (like me) will attach itself to the anogen receptors on your hair follicles and slowly kill them off. Rogaine prevents the anogen receptors from taking in the DHT, Propecia decreases the amount of DHT produced in your body.

 

[Starman]

dude why dont you at least lose the glasses and get contacts? maybe work out a bit? and get out of this slump?

buy some new clothes..that always boosts my confidence

 

[drZaius09]

Originally posted by FlyGuy
So what should I do then? Become a monk?

That is not what I'm saying at all. See, you need to change your attitude. I'm sure you've heard the expression, "A watched pot never boils." You're focusing SO much on making girls like you, getting dates, finding a life mate. There's more to life, and you have to think of the alternatives. Have a back-up plan. Some men (and women) die old and lonely and bitter-- but it doesn't have to be that way, even if you can't find a partner. I know it's hard, it's really hard. But you need to transcend what you see on tv and in movies, what you read in magazines. Create your own destiny, don't just mindlessly follow the same beaten path that's been carved out for all of us.

 

[drZaius09]

Originally posted by FlyGuy
Fvck you man, I should apologize for being a human? Make me out to be a crybaby if you want to...

Whoa, calm down soldier. As you can see, I wasn't directing that at you, otherwise I wouldn't have referred to you in the third person. See?

I doubt you can find a person outside of religious faith who can willingly accept the prospect of never having a relationship or sexual contact with someone.

I can easily accept it. And I'm about as secular as they come.

I don't understand why you are taking this so personally. I'm just trying to help you see things for what they are, rather than the bullsh1t that's been drilled into your subconscious by hollywood, the media, and even friends and family your whole life.

 

[FlyGuy]

dude why dont you at least lose the glasses and get contacts? maybe work out a bit? and get out of this slump?

That's my plan for now. Sort of my last hope for improving my appearance.

You're focusing SO much on making girls like you, getting dates, finding a life mate.

Actually I'm not focusing on that right now, I'm trying to improve myself and my life so I can (hopefully) overcome my depression. After that I'll focus more on the girls, in the mean time I'm trying to gain some knowledge in order to prepare myself. Working out is something that I see as a benefit for me even if it doesn't help with the girls.

Its pretty tough to just sit back an be chill about it though, I don't care what magazines and movies say - I don't like the idea of being 50 years old and NEVER having any success with women my entire life. I don't like the idea of looking back on my life and saying "what if?". What if I had tried more? What if I had put more effort into it? Yeah, I'll survive if I don't find someone but if I tell myself that I don't care I'd be lying. I can't make myself believe a lie.

Its cool man, I see your point but I don't think I can convince myself that I don't care.

 

[FlyGuy]

"I don't understand why you are taking this so personally. I'm just trying to help you see things for what they are, rather than the bullsh1t that's been drilled into your subconscious by hollywood, the media, and even friends and family your whole life."

Let me apologize then, I thought you were directing it at me. I've had a lot of people ridicule me for feeling this way when they know jack sh!t about what its like to go through it. That's why I take it personally. There are a lot of things in life that are bullsh!t that I can't look past. I don't need entertainment, I don't need a good job, friends, family... I don't NEED them. I could live in a cave up in the mountains by myself if I really wanted to. But I can't seem to give up these needs. I need friends. I need family. I may not need entertainment but I find that life is much more enjoyable when I have it. I don't need money or a good job but money seems to be something that is required for most things in life now.

 

[es_mer8]

I've heard jokes about me going bald since I was 10. I haven't had hair loss at all but what I do have is extremely thin hair that to me is unattractive. What I felt was best was for me to just shave it all off. My head is pretty shiny the first few hours of me shaving it and I get some jokes about that but to me, I'd rather have that than all the bald jokes. I like my head shaved as its easier to maintain and I like it. I never heard anyone say they've disliked it either.

 

[STR8UP]

Dude, get real and stop making excuses for your pitiful life.

I have type 6 male pattern baldness (or whatever the hell the worst one is). I can look back at pictures of when I was 21 and see I was destined to be bald even then.

Does it get to me? Sometimes. Should it? No. Why not? because it doesn't bother anyone else nearly as much as it does me. So why worry about it?

I shave it clean, tan once a week, and work out. Stop focusing on what you can't improve and start working on things you can.

Last week a chick that I've been messing with at a club was rubbing me down while we were dancing. She paid extra special attention to my shaved head and commented on it several times. A couple of years ago (and this is before I shaved it completely) I got picked up by a different chick at a club club ONLY because she likes bald men. Go figure.

I can tell you right now with your attitude you WON'T do well with women. Success in that department is much more a mental than a physical game.