Interesting/Frustrating Situation...

Orbitron

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Hello all, first post so here goes...

I was casually seeing K on and off for a few months last year and she was pushing for the whole relationship thing but it was too soon after a horrendous heartbreak in Nov 2016 for me so I told her in no uncertain terms that she is a keeper but I'm just not ready. SO she walked and tbh I wasn't that bothered at first until in early December 2017 we met for coffee and she told me she'd been seeing someone for a couple of months (according to my maths, this would have been around the time of our last date so this guy must have already been on the scene and she was just hoping I was ready to commit, but I speculate here...) and I was gutted.

We met a couple of more times for coffee and I just couldn't handle it any more so I invited her over to my place one evening a couple of weeks back and spilled my guts. We held hands as I read out a handwritten letter to her which in essence told her I love her, I want her but I can't bear to be around her anymore unless she's mine. By the end of the letter, she was in tears and was saying stuff like "**** **** ****, I was SO into you!" and "If only I could turn back the clock!" We spent about 90 minutes together just being affectionate and reminiscing about all the good times before she left.

She said in a text later that evening that she thinks I'm awesome, wishes me so much love and happiness, does want to stay in touch but will leave that with me. I've made no overtures to her at all (apparently I walked past her twice in the pub last weekend and she text me to let me know that) and a couple of days ago she texted me and invited me out for breakfast and I just replied "Not unless you've got something to tell me you think I might want to hear :p" and she replied "Behave!"

I have no intention of contacting her again and I'm pretty sure her contacting me is just her testing my resolve to see if I really mean it. I'm quite prepared to walk away and not look back but we live quite close to each other and we are bound to bump into each other from time to time and when we do, I'll be polite and friendly but definitely not ask her out or anything.

So does this sound like a conflicted girl that might just come back or any other thoughts/observations...

TIA
 

sosousage

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Plates come and go

also that love letter was so creepy LMAO! this was so much beta that I thought this is troll thread
 

ohrein

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Oh dear. Oneitis, grand romantic gestures with women you're not dating, trying to get a girl with a boyfriend (don't lie, you're not walking away, you're hoping she'll come back to you if you leave). Your mindset is waaaaaay off where it needs to be. This woman may or may not come back (from the sounds of it most likely not until her relationship sours) but you won't be able to keep a hold of her. Time to read the bible, my friend.

http://www.djbible.classicalgasemissions.com/
 

Orbitron

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Thanks for your reply but I am walking away as whilst I do hope she comes back, I am a realist and fully accept that she may not. As said I have no intention of contacting her again and in the meantime I'm carrying on doing my own thing; I am currently entertaining a pretty hot Czech girl that is very keen (who also knows that I'm not serious about her) and I'm regularly out and about meeting new girls and occasionally successfully seducing them.

Whilst I would dearly love K to come back into my life as we both agree we adore each others company and it was only my refusal to commit to her exclusively that drove her away in the end.
 

marmel75

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There is no such thing as too soon afterwards for a man...that's a female thing.

You should have stopped crying in your milk, took off your skirt, dropped your lip gloss back in your purse, put your purse away and manned up. If you dont want a relationship but like her just say something like "keep doing what you at doing and things will go where you want them to." Encourage her...you basically shut her down out of hand.

That being said there is no way you should have lost a chick that was into you that quickly unless you basically played things terribly wrong...if they are into you like that you can drag it out at least 6 months and usually close to a year...

You have some work to do.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

ohrein

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Whilst I would dearly love K to come back into my life as we both agree we adore each others company and it was only my refusal to commit to her exclusively that drove her away in the end.
You're posting about her on the internet and asking for advice. You might be trying to move on, but you're not letting go. I'm not saying you should necessarily, maybe this chick sees you as the one that got away. But don't kid yourself. You adore each others company, after all.
 

Spaz

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You're posting about her on the internet and asking for advice. You might be trying to move on, but you're not letting go. I'm not saying you should necessarily, maybe this chick sees you as the one that got away. But don't kid yourself. You adore each others company, after all.
^^ The Truth and nothing but the Truth.
 

Roober

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Think about this...
-she met with you for coffee multiple time
-went to your house late at night
-snuggled with you
-asked you for breakfast

All while she had a guy....

Do you think she told the guys? And, more importantly, do you want a woman like that?
 
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