Interesting Commentary on Marriage

Scaramouche

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Dear Waking Up,
These statistics are frightening as are the long term implications for our Culture.
 

sharkbeat

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You see, for life to happen, you need both men and women. Neither is better nor worse. They are both different, but the balance of these differences is what creates life. These sexual differences are necessary! This is what feminists forget, thinking there was a one-sex-for-all solution.

The way I see it is that men should be the trunk of society to keep it strong, while women should be the leaves to keep it cool. Without the leaves, the trunk is exposed and dry. Without the trunk, the leaves wither. The trunk is now being eaten inside out by termites that is feminism. Though it may appear alright from the outside, eventually the trunk would collapse, and the leaves with it.
 

zekko

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Take a look at that second paragraph. It's saying that in 1997 men thought marriage was more important than women, 35-28%! Now women view it as more important, 37-29%. I would say this indicates an encouraging shift in the right direction.

Of course men are going to be giving up on marriage, there's simply little to no incentive for them to do it, aside from giving their children a proper home. And even then they have to hope against hope that the woman doesn't blow the family up so that they don't end up on the outside looking in, all the while getting stuck with the check.
 

grayclif

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Of course men are going to be giving up on marriage, there's simply little to no incentive for them to do it, aside from giving their children a proper home. And even then they have to hope against hope that the woman doesn't blow the family up so that they don't end up on the outside looking in, all the while getting stuck with the check.
Agreed! What's the point of marriage other than child rearing. In a marriage the sex is guaranteed to fall off as time goes on. I know, I'm one of those on the outside looking in.
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

dustmuffin

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I am telling my boys not to marry. Keep your stuff. Stay single. My divorce obliterated my net worth. My sons see this.
 

Colossus

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Just FYI that article is 3 years old...

But yes marriage is a huge financial risk for men and there is less incentive with each passing year---and I say this as a married man. The thing is you still have many of these risks in any long-term relationship---whether legally binding or not. If you have kids you are still on the hook as far as the law is concerned. And the sex still falls off after long enough, that's life. There are trade-offs to having a long-term stable partner. I think if you choose the right woman the benefits outweigh the risks.

Marriage itself isn't bad---it's that people's attitudes towards it have changed and there is now material incentive for females to divorce if things aren't going their way.
 

zekko

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Yeah, if there is one thing more risky than marriage it's the simple act of having children. Of course, you seldom hear people say they regret having children, presumably because they love their kids so much. I can imagine that, although I have no direct experience since I don't have any children. Of course, some PUA gurus will tell you that women won't hold you financially responsible for their children if you are "alpha" enough. And I do know women who don't want the fathers involved at all just because he's so much of a dirtbag, or else he simply has no resources to drain lol. Unlike these PUA types, I wouldn't want to roll the dice on this type of scenario.

I enjoyed my marriage for what it's worth, until it went south and she began to start arguments about everything. Although my divorce was a small financial stepback, I avoided major losses because of two reasons:
1) We didn't have any children
2) I screened well enough to get a woman who had the decency in the end to not go along with her lawyers plans to totally take me to the cleaners. I offered what I thought was a fair settlement and she accepted it.
 

Trump

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I enjoyed my marriage for what it's worth, until it went south and she began to start arguments about everything. Although my divorce was a small financial stepback, I avoided major losses because of two reasons:
1) We didn't have any children
2) I screened well enough to get a woman who had the decency in the end to not go along with her lawyers plans to totally take me to the cleaners. I offered what I thought was a fair settlement and she accepted it.
Wondering, why did you get married if you were not going to be any children? Even if there were going to be children, why did you get married?
Were you able to do/get anything out of being married to her than that you couldn't if you were not married to her and with her?

My point is, why do people get married? For image, or they think they can't get anyone else? If they think they can't get anyone else, imagine what their wife would do to them when they find out. She would absolutely DESTROY the man.
 

zekko

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Wondering, why did you get married if you were not going to be any children? Even if there were going to be children, why did you get married?
Were you able to do/get anything out of being married to her than that you couldn't if you were not married to her and with her?
Short answer is no, I didn't get anything out of being married that I couldn't have if I wasn't. I was just young and naïve, and figured it was the thing to do. Times were a little different back then (no SoSuave), and while I did understand the risks, I figured that I had stacked the odds in my favor. I screened well, and waited until I was older to marry. The funny thing is, my niece got married when she was 15 and now some 35 years later her marriage is still together. I got married at 33 and it only lasted six years, lol. Oh well.

I do think that the experience of living with a woman is unique and can't be replaced by merely dating. I like having a partner in day to day life. I currently cohabitate with my girlfriend, happily, without having to sign any legal papers with the government. Because when you get married, you're basically signing a contract that empowers the government to come in and redistribute your life, finances, and resources if your relationship doesn't work out. So I agree with you, I can't recommend that men get married.

Now some people say that a woman won't stay with you if you don't put a ring on her finger, because if you won't do it, she'll find someone who will. There may be some truth to that, but the other side of the coin is that if she has high interest in you, she will stick with you under your terms. Of course, how long she remains high interest cannot be counted on, no matter how "alpha" you think you are, which is another reason marriage is a big risk. The other thing to remember is that if a woman doesn't stick with you, it's not the end of the world, especially if you haven't signed that government contract.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

LiveFreeX

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Dear Waking Up,
These statistics are frightening as are the long term implications for our Culture.
Agree, the fall of the 1st world is close at hand now.

Marriage avoidance is stupid, American avoidance is key. Funny, the muslims aren't having these problems.
 
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