Interested in LTR, should I hold off on sex for now?

StrongBad

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Hey all,

I recently met this girl and we hit it off immediately. We hooked up the first night we met and she actually stayed over my apartment though we did not have sex.

The second night we hung out, I wasn't expecting to end up back at her place but I did. I know I could have closed the deal but was not prepared (no protection).

Here's the thing. I am quite interested in this girl as a person, and would like to get to know her more and possibly even develop a relationship if she seems to live up to my expectations. Given my past experience with ex-girlfriends, having sex too early doomed some relationships from the start because it stunted any further emotional growth afterward.

So, when I do hang out with this girl for a third time, even though I undoubtedly could have sex with her, is it wise to do so if I am entertaining the thought of a LTR? Some personal experince/advice would be awesome. Thanks!
 

SamePendo

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I say don't listen to whatever someone else tells you to do... these are one of the things that you must learn by yourself, and do not harm to do, and teach you lots and lots.

Keep going as you are.
 
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StrongBad said:
...I am quite interested in this girl as a person, and would like to get to know her more and possibly even develop a relationship if she seems to live up to my expectations. Given my past experience with ex-girlfriends, having sex too early doomed some relationships from the start because it stunted any further emotional growth afterward.
Let me be honest here - you sound like a girl!!!! "Emotional growth"?? What!!! Girls have this dilemma - not men!!

Do men pursue women for "emotional growth"??

You want a LTR??? WHY??? All that she wants is sex and you are thinking about a LTR - huh???

Hors want sex and not your love in a LTR!!!

Dude, you are off-base!
 

StrongBad

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I understand where you're coming from man, but I think I am kind of growing tired of having casual relationships with 2-3, sometimes 4 different women at a time. See, I've only had 2 LTRs in my lifetime (I'm 24) and both were a good long time ago when I was still in my teens. This girl actually sparked an interest in me, something no other hors were able to do in years. Naturally, this made me curious. Why should I not pursue it? If having LTRs isn't your thing b/c of how your live your life right now, that's cool with me, but if I am curious again, especially given how much time has passed since my last, I figure why not?
 

letmeshowyou

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listen... if she'll let u hit - then hit
whats that got to do with a LTR, if she was worthy of a real relationship, she wouldn't let u smash so soon in the first place
 

mr. joker

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I'm really not agreeing with any of the advice on this post, no offense. If you think that having sex early will screw up any LTR you want to have, then it will. If you can realize that sex is simply sex, and that it doesn't mean anything other than what you and the chick make it mean, then you can do whatever you want. As far as emotionality goes, that is something that takes time to build. It is a totally separate animal than sex. One does not take the place of the other. Many ppl have sex to establish that emotional bond you are referring to, and that can make you closer to a girl, especially if you think maybe you want a LTR with her. Do not, however, think that having sex with this girl will keep you from sharing and building an emotional relationship with her. Hope this helps!
 
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letmeshowyou said:
listen... if she'll let u hit - then hit
whats that got to do with a LTR, if she was worthy of a real relationship, she wouldn't let u smash so soon in the first place
EXACTLY!!!! She is not LTR material if she drops her panties so quickly!

If you do have a LTR with her then don't be surprised if she drops her panties so quickly for another dude! I prefer a LTR rather then a quick ho-hit but you have to have high standards and a great amount of trust for it to happen.
 
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