Vantagepoint34
Master Don Juan
Haha. You claim she was Married. How many years?I was with one for 15yrs, married for 5 of those. Met her in highschool. Easiest relationship I ever had. She knew her place, was very supportive, could take care of her self, had open communication, we got along very well, didn't need my attention 24-7. The relationship ended because we quit working on it. Both got busy with our own goals and didn't pay attention to each other. She cheated on me, I divorced her.
The 2nd one was a secure avoidant. It took me 4-5 dates to have sex with this chic which is unusual. After 4months of dating she tells me she loves me, I'm her person, blah blah blah. She rides the high for a month or two, starts to feel vulnerable then gets flakey and starts to pull away. She wants to be friends, not lovers. I tell her hell no, I'm not friends with girls I'm not fuhking. We were at a bar when i told her that and she has an outburst of emotion and jumped in my lap with delight. That comment got me another few weeks out of the relationship. I didn't know she was a secure avoidant until after I dated her and made sense of everything. The strangest thing about her was she would take trips by herself to the mountains and go backpacking/fishing. 5'8" long blonde hair, pretty face, perfect body, very natural beauty. Not what you would expect to see on some hiking trail by herself.
The 3rd girl with secure attachment style was easy to get along with, didn't worry about my long line of exgf's. Didn't rush into anything romantic. She knew I was dating others in the beginning. Didn't question me. Trusted whatever I told her. Comfortable with who she was in our relationship. Always kept her emotions in check. There was an insecure side to her regarding her looks(Fake t!ts, hair extensions, nose job, & regular botox). She was also a little needy at times but it was puppy dog like harmless. Didn't have a social media addiction, only had close friends. She'd look to her man for validation. She got too caught up in her work and that led to the demise of our relationship and when her job got stressful she got selfish.
All of these girls had high level jobs. They could take care of themselves financially. Had their life in order. Not flakey, not cluster-b's. Brought a lot to the relationship, were very feminine.
Women with secure attachment styles are no doubt the easiest to get a long with long term. They will have a higher level of independence as well. The drawback for me has been when their jobs bled into our relationship. At times it was hard for them to turn all that off and play their role as a submissive, vulnerable, caring, supportive woman that drew me near. There's a reason SS says what it does about career women. A guy has to figure out what works for him. I'm not sure what the perfect scenario would be unless she had a less demanding career.
Look I brought up Megan Fox, Ashley Tisdale, You have heard of gambino
Op Loves stars/Fame
Mod des had an invite for ppl to join his in his public divorce. Drive an Audi?! bumpInsecure women are certainly commonplace in the dating landscape & I know OP has encountered a number of them.
The advice generally given around SS (the woman needs to initiate etc.) tends to hold true for insecure women. It will not hold true however for self confident, self assured women (which is what I assume men are looking for when they say they want a “quality” girl) and I typically advise men insofar as how best to attract confident women, which is a different deal than insecure women.
That’s not to say you can’t get a good interaction with an insecure girl, but as a man you’ve got to understand what you are dealing with because it makes a difference in how the interaction is going to play out.
Cheers.
:crazy: