Initiating sexual chatter online

oc16

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
1,540
Reaction score
1,065
It seems 50% of the women will be into it and 50% are turned off by it.

Mind you, these are women I am meeting on Facebook dating, Match.com, etc.

Also, I don't like online dating, so I DON'T take it seriously.

Now, I know it's the mans job to take things to the next level and be "sexual" or she will see you as a "nice guy" and you won't get anywhere.

However, it seems the last couple of women (woman I did not meet in person) got turned off when I made some "sexual" comments.

First woman on Facebook dating: She was Peruvian from New York and was in Italy on vacation. She mentioned she was shopping, and I said "Are you going to buy any lingerie? She unmatched me.

Second woman on match.com. We were going back and forth for a couple of days. She mentions she like to dress up for Halloween and said she once dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood. Later in the convo I asked if she wore "red stockings" with her Little Red Riding Hood outfit. She told me she isn't into that "kind of chatter" and told me we were not a good match.

Part of me thinks the only women that don't mind this type of talk or like it are the ones that will subtlety initiate it.

Thoughts?
 

pipeman84

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2022
Messages
1,442
Reaction score
1,875
Age
40
Location
Europe
Now, I know it's the mans job to take things to the next level and be "sexual" or she will see you as a "nice guy" and you won't get anywhere.
It's the woman who signals first that she's open for the guy to escalate ... flirting, then touching, more or less 'accidental'. She won't see you as 'nice guy' if you don't give that vibe ... if you don't escalate at first she will see you as a challenge and make it more obvious with flirting and touching and if you still don't escalate then she will get the message you're not interested in her. It's a big misconception that if you're not acting as a horny teenager or a baboon in heat, the woman will see you as a 'nice guy'.

First woman on Facebook dating: She was Peruvian from New York and was in Italy on vacation. She mentioned she was shopping, and I said "Are you going to buy any lingerie? She unmatched me.
Congratulations to her. :D
In that context - you two have never met in real life - I can imagine that line working if you have a Chad profile and she's a real hoe.

Second woman on match.com. We were going back and forth for a couple of days. She mentions she like to dress up for Halloween and said she once dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood. Later in the convo I asked if she wore "red stockings" with her Little Red Riding Hood outfit. She told me she isn't into that "kind of chatter" and told me we were not a good match.
I think online chatter is a complete waste of time under the illusion of building rapport ... until you meet the person in real life, you have no idea who you're actually talking to and if there's any chemistry.
 

Stanley

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 6, 2022
Messages
1,115
Reaction score
1,320
No, your aim should be getting their number or setting up a date, not playing 'internetsex footsie'.
Many women (and some men) will be turned off be sexting behavior with some stranger they just matched with on the internet. The women that reciprocate are likely just using you for validation and will never give you an inch.
 

BillyPilgrim

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 9, 2021
Messages
4,921
Reaction score
3,794
Generally you want to screen their bios to see if they're a sexually open woman, and then you want to use plausible deniability and well-placed humor in your innuendos and communication.

In your examples you could have gone with "are you going to buy me any lingerie?" (which could either mean for me to wear or for me to admire, not that I'm saying you would wear it but the ambiguity could be amusing to her, and then you could deny any homo overtones by saying "I'm not that kinda dude, more of a take charge kind of guy actually") or "did the big bad wolf get ya?" which I imagine would go over better

But if she's sexually open and demonstrates high interest during the rapport building stage, she's liable to cut you more slack than these women did. They seem stuffy and uptight from what I can tell. But that being said the more you do it, the better you can walk the tightrope.
 
Last edited:

Hamurabimbi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2018
Messages
3,729
Reaction score
3,185
Location
California
It seems 50% of the women will be into it and 50% are turned off by it.

Mind you, these are women I am meeting on Facebook dating, Match.com, etc.

Also, I don't like online dating, so I DON'T take it seriously.

Now, I know it's the mans job to take things to the next level and be "sexual" or she will see you as a "nice guy" and you won't get anywhere.

However, it seems the last couple of women (woman I did not meet in person) got turned off when I made some "sexual" comments.

First woman on Facebook dating: She was Peruvian from New York and was in Italy on vacation. She mentioned she was shopping, and I said "Are you going to buy any lingerie? She unmatched me.

Second woman on match.com. We were going back and forth for a couple of days. She mentions she like to dress up for Halloween and said she once dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood. Later in the convo I asked if she wore "red stockings" with her Little Red Riding Hood outfit. She told me she isn't into that "kind of chatter" and told me we were not a good match.

Part of me thinks the only women that don't mind this type of talk or like it are the ones that will subtlety initiate it.

Thoughts?
If her profile has something like this. Go big.
6257D020-A25D-44C0-8AF3-050267FDEAE8.jpeg
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

AmsterdamAssassin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
7,042
Reaction score
6,106
Part of me thinks the only women that don't mind this type of talk or like it are the ones that will subtlety initiate it.
Yes.
 

Gamisch

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 2, 2022
Messages
3,665
Reaction score
4,429
I do kinda agree that in general you must escalate quickly. ( Imo a kiss is also escalation. )

It's a slippery slope, because nowadays is like the first era where women seemingly have such an abundance that they can "simply " move on quickly.

You dont wanna get strung along infinitely. Sexualizing the conversation is a skill tho..you might lose a good woman by following bad BLACKPILL advice disguised as redpill advice ....

I do agree that acting like a horny neanderthaler is ill advised.
 
Last edited:

kavi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2022
Messages
762
Reaction score
649
Age
40
It seems 50% of the women will be into it and 50% are turned off by it.

Mind you, these are women I am meeting on Facebook dating, Match.com, etc.

Also, I don't like online dating, so I DON'T take it seriously.

Now, I know it's the mans job to take things to the next level and be "sexual" or she will see you as a "nice guy" and you won't get anywhere.

However, it seems the last couple of women (woman I did not meet in person) got turned off when I made some "sexual" comments.

First woman on Facebook dating: She was Peruvian from New York and was in Italy on vacation. She mentioned she was shopping, and I said "Are you going to buy any lingerie? She unmatched me.

Second woman on match.com. We were going back and forth for a couple of days. She mentions she like to dress up for Halloween and said she once dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood. Later in the convo I asked if she wore "red stockings" with her Little Red Riding Hood outfit. She told me she isn't into that "kind of chatter" and told me we were not a good match.

Part of me thinks the only women that don't mind this type of talk or like it are the ones that will subtlety initiate it.

Thoughts?
It is highly disrespectful to men in general especiall high quality for men and women to engage in such low conversation.

To respect THE GAME you cannot denigrate sex or talk about it in low terms.

For a man to engage in such talk is a major problem for the dating market, and such talk is a direct cause of the failing of the dating market.

All this type of low behaviour is your saying you think a guy like me cannot talk like that when infact I find it beneath me to do so. It dont make me a nice guy. And for women who like that it is just a way to make a fool out of you and belittle the fact that she is sleeping with such a loser way. All this toxiticy and low-class degen behaviour is what is destroying male-female relationships so ppl shouldnt be engaging in it.

If you wanna talk about sex you should do it in a straightforward matter-of-fact way and not engage in these word-games. These games are all there to make a fool out of men who dont understand why their dignity is so broken.
 

Bingo-Player

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 10, 2014
Messages
3,407
Reaction score
3,902
Location
uk
I have never ever experienced sexual chat working with a woman you have never met

its hard enough building up chemistry with a girl in person because there are so many intricacies in female attraction and at any second you can destroy them all saying or doing the wrong thing

Only absolute slots will openly talk about it quickly

And Online ? forget about it
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

AmsterdamAssassin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
7,042
Reaction score
6,106
I have never ever experienced sexual chat working with a woman you have never met
I guess that is why it's impossible, because you never ever experienced it.
 

RickPound

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 17, 2021
Messages
241
Reaction score
231
Age
39
It’s a risk to sexualize online chats for the reasons OP mentioned. You can do it cleverly if there’s an opportunity, but it’s better to raise her interest with some good, efficient text game and lead to a meetup. She knows what you want and she knows if she’s going to fvck you already as long as you escalate correctly in person.

You risk blowing it up and sounding like a dog ready to hump her leg if you force an uncalibrated message too early.

I just spent a few days fvcking the sh*t out of a girl off hinge visiting my town. In her profile it said My Love Language is “physical touch all over” and she told me she screens guys out who respond to that one with something sexual. I commented on her hiking picture, set up a date for that night, and she extended her trip for 2 more days.
 

corrector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
9,764
Reaction score
3,728
It seems 50% of the women will be into it and 50% are turned off by it.

Mind you, these are women I am meeting on Facebook dating, Match.com, etc.

Also, I don't like online dating, so I DON'T take it seriously.

Now, I know it's the mans job to take things to the next level and be "sexual" or she will see you as a "nice guy" and you won't get anywhere.

However, it seems the last couple of women (woman I did not meet in person) got turned off when I made some "sexual" comments.

First woman on Facebook dating: She was Peruvian from New York and was in Italy on vacation. She mentioned she was shopping, and I said "Are you going to buy any lingerie? She unmatched me.

Second woman on match.com. We were going back and forth for a couple of days. She mentions she like to dress up for Halloween and said she once dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood. Later in the convo I asked if she wore "red stockings" with her Little Red Riding Hood outfit. She told me she isn't into that "kind of chatter" and told me we were not a good match.

Part of me thinks the only women that don't mind this type of talk or like it are the ones that will subtlety initiate it.

Thoughts?
You are sub 5.
 

Hamurabimbi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2018
Messages
3,729
Reaction score
3,185
Location
California
It seems 50% of the women will be into it and 50% are turned off by it.

Mind you, these are women I am meeting on Facebook dating, Match.com, etc.

Also, I don't like online dating, so I DON'T take it seriously.

Now, I know it's the mans job to take things to the next level and be "sexual" or she will see you as a "nice guy" and you won't get anywhere.

However, it seems the last couple of women (woman I did not meet in person) got turned off when I made some "sexual" comments.

First woman on Facebook dating: She was Peruvian from New York and was in Italy on vacation. She mentioned she was shopping, and I said "Are you going to buy any lingerie? She unmatched me.

Second woman on match.com. We were going back and forth for a couple of days. She mentions she like to dress up for Halloween and said she once dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood. Later in the convo I asked if she wore "red stockings" with her Little Red Riding Hood outfit. She told me she isn't into that "kind of chatter" and told me we were not a good match.

Part of me thinks the only women that don't mind this type of talk or like it are the ones that will subtlety initiate it.

Thoughts?
Those seem playful & just a bit risqué. I’m surprised they didn’t respond more positively. .
 
Top