In abit of a pickle

[jtb123]

Theres this girl that I like and we have gone out a couple a couple of times and we've kissed and hooked up together but I dont know if she wants to be boyfriend/girlfriend.

We talk on MSN alot and call occasionally and she often talks about other hot guys she sees and she talks to, but then again so do I. How can i break it too her that it would be good to get into a relationship and I want to get into a relationship with her before she actually gets together with one of these hot guys(Its my fear, yes I know thats bad but if it does happen ill get over it, I just dont particularly WANT it to happen)?

 

[jtb123]

She is also studying alot for the big end of school exam comming up in a few days (which shes very stressed about) hence she being unable to do anything at all with anyone (she stopped her studying just to come out with me a few times which she hasnt done for anyone else). So we cant really go out for a little while.

 

[Keeper]

Sounds like a problem you can send through to the dating column of a gossip magazine.

Dr Keeper (A man of many break ups), responds:

There prolly is the interest level, and her mentions on hot guys are probably attempts at getting your attention. They're sublime ways of saying: "Yooohoo! Wake up you slow poke! When are you gonna get serious with me? I'm not gonna try making you jealous for much longer..."

So how would you go about turning this into a blossoming relationship?

Exercise the DJ ways you can read about here and here.

My 2c, though, are: just step up your game. Begin to be more exclusive with her.

 

[jtb123]

So do you mean talk to her more? talk to her less?

Also I have read many of the DJ articles, and is there any suggestions on excuses on how I can get her to see me when shes studying, or should I just leave it until after (which is like 3 weeks)?

 

[Keeper]

Uhh... I've learnt not to disturb people who say they're studying. So don't ask me about that.

And as for talking to her... yeah, you could try spending more time with her. That would seem like the logical thing to do if you want to move into a relationship.

Oh, just remembered. Never seek her approval for going into this relationship. Take the lead here - she's dying to follow.

 

[jtb123]

Yer I think I need to spend more time with her but i cant because of the study
And 3 weeks is a long time

 

[jtb123]

bump

 

[Tyron]

Don't be an emotinal tampoon, know what you want from that relationship. If she doesn't deliver, move on. In your case, make a move and see what happens. You either are gonna ruin your "friendship" or have a girl to date. Either way, it shouldnt matter if u didnt want friendship in the first place.

ps. then again I re-read your post and probably missed the point. doh.

 

[jtb123]

Okay now shes treating me like a friend. Today she told me how she was talking to this hot guy all day and she thinks she might have a chance (but she said she was joking). Again, how can I get in there when shes studying? Do i basically talk to her and ask her whats going on? Should I ask her out and says its a 'proper date' or what?

 

[jtb123]

and how do you recommend I react when she talks about some other hot guy. Cause atm im pretending not to care and just laughing at it.

 

[GuitarPlayer]

Originally posted by jtb123
...she often talks about other hot guys she sees and she talks to, but then again so do I.

There's the answer. She thinks you're gay.


Just kidding. Her big talk about other guys is a test for you. As in, can you handle it or do you get jealous out of an inferiorority complex. The next time she does this, suggest that she should hook up with the guy in question. That'll send her reeling and very much demonstrate that you're secure within yourself.

Do it!