In a slump.

[Docs]

I'm at a loss for the solution to my problem.

Ever since I moved back from Kingston to where I am now (I'm moving back at Christmas, this is all work related), I've felt like sh!t. In Kingston, I had two wings to go out with and chill and stuff, and I come back here...I got friends here, but coordinating stuff is hell. My best man here has a girl, and he tends to work nights, and has school and stuff, so it's hard to hang with him, so I've been hanging out with my ex and her best friend a little too much. (I never feel up to calling any of the other girls I have contact with, I don't know why, and as for other bros...nadda, reasons just below)

Anyways, I feel so lonely a lot of the time because I spend a lot of nights at home, because I can't go to a bar solo (best bud's UA), and as for meeting new people, they need to be on the same personality level as me, and I haven't been finding them yet, so I'm at a stall for new friends. As for girls, I'm not in the correct mindset, but when I used to be, I had no problems approaching and running with it all. Now..I won't even talk to a random girl usually...unless I really feel like it. I'm totally thrown off my own self big time, and in a huge slump because I can't get into the right mindset by myself.

So to combat this slump, I've tried to divert my depression towards the guitar, learning how to play it and stuff, and consuming time with work..playing music and the computer. I guess I'm looking for words of encouragement, a kick in the ass, or something to just talk about.

Thanks.

 

[justinsane]

I think you need some http://www.brainyquote.com to get you out of this yer in as a start.

Works for me and you might as well go out to bars/lounges just to get that social feel. What else have you been doing?

Also lifts some weights/jogging.

 

[RedPill]

If making new social connections in your temporary setting is pointless, use this opportunity to go on a massive self-improvement binge. Sounds like you already got started with guitar. Put yourself through some hardcore physical conditioning, do a ton of self-improvement reading, and start formulating your plan to build the Docs empire.

When you return to Kingston you'll be the fukkin man! Chicks, business, rock stardom, doesn't matter... At peak physical and mental condition, you'll be ready to take on anything.

 

[justinsane]

If making new social connections in your temporary setting is pointless, use this opportunity to go on a massive self-improvement binge. Sounds like you already got started with guitar. Put yourself through some hardcore physical conditioning, do a ton of self-improvement reading, and start formulating your plan to build the Docs empire.

When you return to Kingston you'll be the fukkin man! Chicks, business, rock stardom, doesn't matter... At peak physical and mental condition, you'll be ready to take on anything.

Yea just what I said! Ok I was making it simple.

Take the red pill. You can't regret it. (His advice. Not sure if he actually make real red pills.)

 

[Docs]

We'll see how it goes ^^

-What kinda pill is a red pill?

 

[justinsane]

We'll see how it goes ^^

-What kinda pill is a red pill?

I was hoping for the red pill to answer that.

I'm into blue pills though.......

I guess ah crap I pulled an all nighter again. Got to find normal job.

 

[RedPill]

The red pill is a Matrix reference.

 

[Desdinova]

It's always amazed me how much people on here can rely on wingmen. Since I put myself on the DJ path, I quit going out with other guys because I found they dragged me down to their level, and I'd end up sitting and staring at hot women with them instead of taking action. When I'm out solo, there's nothing to pull me back from having fun and meeting new people. To me, a wingman is a waste of time and energy especially if they're not on the same level as me.

You don't need a wingman to approach an n-set. You don't need a wingman to deal with c0ckblockers. You also don't need a wingman to give you that extra push. IMO, solo sarging is an excellent skill to learn. Everything is on your schedule, and you don't have to co-ordinate anything with anybody. I can't tell you how many nights I wasted waiting for a friend to get back to me, and if he did get back to me with a "no", I stayed home instead of going out and having fun. What a waste!

I find that men can be just as flakey, if not MORE flakey than women ESPECIALLY if they have a gf. That's why I prefer to meet my friends at a location. Many times, although they said they would meet me, they wouldn't show up at all.

I finally asked myself, "Why am I spending my life waiting for other people?" I decided to quit watching opportunities pass me by because I waited for other people to figure out what the fvck they were doing.

 

[Docs]

That's insightful Des! It's not that I need a wingman to PICK UP, I just haven't gotten past the idea of going alone because I can't get into the club mood. I have no difficulty approaching solo, but it's just the club and being alone, I feel scared, lol ^^

-Really, you're totally right, I shouldn't be relying on a wingman to feel the mood in a club. Another thing to improve and overcome I guess. I did take the liberity to talk about clubbing with a good girl--friend at work, and she said she'd let me know when they go out again. Maybe going to the club, even with some girls will help to kick the mood problem.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

It's always amazed me how much people on here can rely on wingmen. Since I put myself on the DJ path, I quit going out with other guys because I found they dragged me down to their level, and I'd end up sitting and staring at hot women with them instead of taking action. When I'm out solo, there's nothing to pull me back from having fun and meeting new people. To me, a wingman is a waste of time and energy especially if they're not on the same level as me....

I completely agree. Squadrons and wingmen are a great concept but understand that it can be limiting. Besides, wingmen (at least a full squad) only really works in a club environment. Sarging alone works everywhere, alone you can approach a single woman or an entire group. A full squad approaching a woman on her own would be a bit intimidating.

Here's a suggestion Doc, why not kill two birds with one stone. Why not sign up for a guitar class and sarge the women there? No need to have a wing, there will be (hopefully) nice looking women there with a common interest and you will be enhancing your skills at the same time!

I suggest asking if you could sit in and observe a couple of classes before signing up. It'll allow you to chose the one with the best prospects. Plus, you could ask a couple of them out to give you a bit of feedback about what they like about the class.

 

[Docs]

Here's a suggestion Doc, why not kill two birds with one stone. Why not sign up for a guitar class and sarge the women there? No need to have a wing, there will be (hopefully) nice looking women there with a common interest and you will be enhancing your skills at the same time!
I suggest asking if you could sit in and observe a couple of classes before signing up. It'll allow you to chose the one with the best prospects. Plus, you could ask a couple of them out to give you a bit of feedback about what they like about the class.

That's a pretty good idea, but it'd be for after Christmas when I move. I'm doing a online tutorial at the moment, and it's working at the moment. I guess when I get down, and I get the instructor and all, my self-fumbling will have paid off. Thanks!