TheGambino
Master Don Juan
I make this thread for all of us to learn. This is also for myself that I won't screw up with this woman if it does work out or the next one that will cross my path and I like to keep.
I've been dating this woman for 6 months now and I made some mistakes but also did a lot of things right I want to lay out here so I can prove a point.
@Glassguy has so much knowledge but I want to open discussion with you about one thing I disagree with. I disagree with you but will more members of the forum on this topic.
I dealt with so many women in my life and I keep doing it but my experience and also what I see from close friends who have steady girlfriends for 5+ years. I will get back to this later in my thread.
This only applies to women that are ''too busy'' ''don't have time a week'' or you gut tells you that they need space. (They take time to text back, texts shorter, leave you on read for hours then replie) Basically your less of an priority.
Background from my last learning experience so you understand where I come from!
I was playing games with her in the beginning to keep her hooked, I was just in for cex and trying to find a even better woman. I'm wired to do so since I dont want a LTR only if shes 100% worth it, I figured that she wasn't it.
She was in love, I got all IoI's for that. ''meet my parents'' She says ''I love you in bed'' one time, I can never leave, very needy and clingy around me. Doing everything I want always never declining dates untill some things happen.
*Change of her behavior starts after 6 weeks.
I disapointed her twice by not listening to her feelings, shutting it down once which was a big deal, a stupid honest thing about my past (fight and jailtime a couple of days) and she saw on my Instagram once that I was partying in a fancy clubs with hoes around us. I didnt reach out to her for days and she gave me the talk eventually that she doesnt find us compabitle and she sees things differently then me. I agree with her without seeming buthurt and go NC for two weeks. I realize in those two weeks that I actually do like her around me and text her a voice chat if she can help me with something and this ends up in texting, flirting true text and hooking up again. She tells me you never fought for us, you gave up so easy, you didnt care or think about me. When we were together all super, but she needed more attention when we were appart. Thats what she says. okay, now my point.
I make a thread about this all and some members reply with ''cut her loose'' ''ignore her texts'' ''don't reply'' ''leave it on read'' I even read tell her: ''my ex came back around'' she if she will compete otherwise its win win.
If you want to her back in, in a healthy way so the dating and cex can continue this isn't the way to go.
This is in my opinion all redpill, harsh talk that is not optimal.
What you need to do is polite indifference.
If she yells at you, disrespects you or in front of others, whatever then you bail and ignore her I agree your a man never lose your dignity to no one. But when she dont reply but if she does small things like, taking time to text back, leaving you on read for hours but still replies always, being short, not flirty it all indicates lower interest or trying to change your behavior or getting you back because of 1000 reasons. It's a woman, her emotions fluctuate, she can be loving you but she can also have a bad day, a negative day, negative feelings and then she will think more about the times you made her feel bad or inesecure. Which will result in her saying ''im sorry i need some time for myself'' ''leaving you on read'' ''I'm busy this week ill get back to you'' or even worse ''I need some space or time appart''.
For example in my case I initiated more texts after hooking up again after a break to show her that I'm working on what she wants, she told me that. But only for a max of a week! You can't expect her interest to go from 6 back to 9, she will still have doubts about how you made her feel before the ''break up talk''. We go back and forth, back and forth and then I don't reply to one of her texts in the night and she goes in game playing mode again and reading my texts for hours before replying, basically to give you back what you did to her.
FIELD EXPERIENCE: I sent my girl yesterday a exciting new thing I want to do with her but didn't tell her what and that I was excited to see her. She came back enthusiastic with emoticons trying to figure out what the exciting thing was but I kept telling her not going to tell you. Then she replies with ''do you need me actually around for that?'' and finally I ask for a day and time and she replies with ''I cant that day'' I say which day are you avaible and she says;
''I hope you don't mind but I want to come back calm from my vacation, Ill will let you know something''
''oh yeah I completely understand that, I feel the same when I come back from a vacation, take all the time you need and I'll hear from you''
She replies immediatley
''Thanks!
Yeah I come back very late, I'm busy with work also upcoming days so yeah''
''I want to figure out what it is that you want to do with me!''
She keeps texting trying to figure it out and being very curious.
Now I planted a seed, made our last conversation positive and trying to convince her but changed her mood.
She says that she will reach out when shes availble and ofc now I keep the ball in her court, I wont reach out under any circumstances.
But in a couple of days, or maybe even now, she will still miss me, she will still worry if I don't talk to other women, she will still think that I could be banging another one even tonight, I dont have to mention that, let her hamster spin. What I also accomplish is her being curious what the news is, its positive so theres no heavy talk or discussion or arguing, it's flirty and fun and I respected her need for space. That means your mature and indifferent enough to respect her boundaries, feelings, and it actually shows that you care. But it also shows that your indifferent because your cool waiting to hear from her, or not. Because if you stop chasing, it means he doesnt really care if I reach out to him or not, thats what will make her hamster spin.
The solution I chose is ''Don't change her mind, CHANGE HER MOOD'' combined with ''POLITE INDIFFERENCE''. And this is where my friends in succesfull ltrs with amazing women don't screw up.
Instead of arguing (what you SHOULD NEVER DO), or ignoring her, or telling her ''I got other girls in line'', you should reply later, you should give her shorter answers you change her mood by telling her you got something new you want to do with her and make her excited to see you again. If she declines or tells you im busy Ill get back to you later. You don't tell her the PUA sh*t from above.
This all indicates that your bvtthurt, mad, bitter, women let you down more often. It's also not credible because you wanted to see her but when she declined, your mad.
Again you can react like that only if she disrespects you. Being busy or testing you how you will react on that is not disrespect it's a test for you and herself to see if she will miss you or not. Answer with polite indifference!
I gave this women much emotional rollercoasters so its likeley that she will be back.
Ofc if you don't want to put up with it and she's not worth all this for you, then be my guest ignore her text delete her number and find another one. This is for the guys that want to keep her.
One more thing: If you got a daughter that's mad, shes emotional, crying, she doens't want to talk, be around her father for a bit and just caught up in her emotions. But she still loves her father with all her heart, some time will pass and she will come back to him needing a hugg.
Excuse me from my grammer, Im from Europe.
I've been dating this woman for 6 months now and I made some mistakes but also did a lot of things right I want to lay out here so I can prove a point.
@Glassguy has so much knowledge but I want to open discussion with you about one thing I disagree with. I disagree with you but will more members of the forum on this topic.
I dealt with so many women in my life and I keep doing it but my experience and also what I see from close friends who have steady girlfriends for 5+ years. I will get back to this later in my thread.
This only applies to women that are ''too busy'' ''don't have time a week'' or you gut tells you that they need space. (They take time to text back, texts shorter, leave you on read for hours then replie) Basically your less of an priority.
Background from my last learning experience so you understand where I come from!
I was playing games with her in the beginning to keep her hooked, I was just in for cex and trying to find a even better woman. I'm wired to do so since I dont want a LTR only if shes 100% worth it, I figured that she wasn't it.
She was in love, I got all IoI's for that. ''meet my parents'' She says ''I love you in bed'' one time, I can never leave, very needy and clingy around me. Doing everything I want always never declining dates untill some things happen.
*Change of her behavior starts after 6 weeks.
I disapointed her twice by not listening to her feelings, shutting it down once which was a big deal, a stupid honest thing about my past (fight and jailtime a couple of days) and she saw on my Instagram once that I was partying in a fancy clubs with hoes around us. I didnt reach out to her for days and she gave me the talk eventually that she doesnt find us compabitle and she sees things differently then me. I agree with her without seeming buthurt and go NC for two weeks. I realize in those two weeks that I actually do like her around me and text her a voice chat if she can help me with something and this ends up in texting, flirting true text and hooking up again. She tells me you never fought for us, you gave up so easy, you didnt care or think about me. When we were together all super, but she needed more attention when we were appart. Thats what she says. okay, now my point.
I make a thread about this all and some members reply with ''cut her loose'' ''ignore her texts'' ''don't reply'' ''leave it on read'' I even read tell her: ''my ex came back around'' she if she will compete otherwise its win win.
If you want to her back in, in a healthy way so the dating and cex can continue this isn't the way to go.
This is in my opinion all redpill, harsh talk that is not optimal.
What you need to do is polite indifference.
If she yells at you, disrespects you or in front of others, whatever then you bail and ignore her I agree your a man never lose your dignity to no one. But when she dont reply but if she does small things like, taking time to text back, leaving you on read for hours but still replies always, being short, not flirty it all indicates lower interest or trying to change your behavior or getting you back because of 1000 reasons. It's a woman, her emotions fluctuate, she can be loving you but she can also have a bad day, a negative day, negative feelings and then she will think more about the times you made her feel bad or inesecure. Which will result in her saying ''im sorry i need some time for myself'' ''leaving you on read'' ''I'm busy this week ill get back to you'' or even worse ''I need some space or time appart''.
For example in my case I initiated more texts after hooking up again after a break to show her that I'm working on what she wants, she told me that. But only for a max of a week! You can't expect her interest to go from 6 back to 9, she will still have doubts about how you made her feel before the ''break up talk''. We go back and forth, back and forth and then I don't reply to one of her texts in the night and she goes in game playing mode again and reading my texts for hours before replying, basically to give you back what you did to her.
FIELD EXPERIENCE: I sent my girl yesterday a exciting new thing I want to do with her but didn't tell her what and that I was excited to see her. She came back enthusiastic with emoticons trying to figure out what the exciting thing was but I kept telling her not going to tell you. Then she replies with ''do you need me actually around for that?'' and finally I ask for a day and time and she replies with ''I cant that day'' I say which day are you avaible and she says;
''I hope you don't mind but I want to come back calm from my vacation, Ill will let you know something''
''oh yeah I completely understand that, I feel the same when I come back from a vacation, take all the time you need and I'll hear from you''
She replies immediatley
''Thanks!
Yeah I come back very late, I'm busy with work also upcoming days so yeah''''I want to figure out what it is that you want to do with me!''
She keeps texting trying to figure it out and being very curious.
Now I planted a seed, made our last conversation positive and trying to convince her but changed her mood.
She says that she will reach out when shes availble and ofc now I keep the ball in her court, I wont reach out under any circumstances.
But in a couple of days, or maybe even now, she will still miss me, she will still worry if I don't talk to other women, she will still think that I could be banging another one even tonight, I dont have to mention that, let her hamster spin. What I also accomplish is her being curious what the news is, its positive so theres no heavy talk or discussion or arguing, it's flirty and fun and I respected her need for space. That means your mature and indifferent enough to respect her boundaries, feelings, and it actually shows that you care. But it also shows that your indifferent because your cool waiting to hear from her, or not. Because if you stop chasing, it means he doesnt really care if I reach out to him or not, thats what will make her hamster spin.
The solution I chose is ''Don't change her mind, CHANGE HER MOOD'' combined with ''POLITE INDIFFERENCE''. And this is where my friends in succesfull ltrs with amazing women don't screw up.
Instead of arguing (what you SHOULD NEVER DO), or ignoring her, or telling her ''I got other girls in line'', you should reply later, you should give her shorter answers you change her mood by telling her you got something new you want to do with her and make her excited to see you again. If she declines or tells you im busy Ill get back to you later. You don't tell her the PUA sh*t from above.
This all indicates that your bvtthurt, mad, bitter, women let you down more often. It's also not credible because you wanted to see her but when she declined, your mad.
Again you can react like that only if she disrespects you. Being busy or testing you how you will react on that is not disrespect it's a test for you and herself to see if she will miss you or not. Answer with polite indifference!
I gave this women much emotional rollercoasters so its likeley that she will be back.
Ofc if you don't want to put up with it and she's not worth all this for you, then be my guest ignore her text delete her number and find another one. This is for the guys that want to keep her.
One more thing: If you got a daughter that's mad, shes emotional, crying, she doens't want to talk, be around her father for a bit and just caught up in her emotions. But she still loves her father with all her heart, some time will pass and she will come back to him needing a hugg.
Excuse me from my grammer, Im from Europe.
