I'm going to start approaching again and have a few questions.

[Viper]

Yep, I'm going to start approaching girls again and I have a few questions. Now, before we get started, what do I mean like again? Well, near the end of the school year I finally got over my fears and started to approach girls, now that school has begun again, I have not approached any girls because of a few insecurities I have.
1. To become better at approaching, should I approach any and all girls or should just approach a girl that I find attractive?
2. Girls walk too fast in the hallway and also seem to walk in groups in the hallway, bottom line, hallway isn't a good place to approach, unless the girls not headed somewhere. Where are some good places to approach in High School?
3. How do I raise the interest level with groups of women?
4. I'm not a very good conversationlist. Like, if I see a girl in the lunch line, I'll be like hey how's it going, get her name and everything and then won't be able to carry on the conversation, because I'm just a bad conversationlist.

This is how a typical approach, with a random girl usually goes:

[I approach up a random girl]
Me: Hey, what's your name?
Girl: Uh.. my name?
Me: Yes.
Girl: I'm [Her Name].
Me: Oh, it's nice to meet you, [Her Name].
Me: I'm Mike, remember that.
Girl: Oh, it's nice to meet you, Mike.
Me: Yeah.
Me: Well, I've got to be going now. But rest assure, I will see you later.

Here are a couple of approaches from last school year, so you can see exactly what I mean:

Danielle, I've been wanting to go out with this chick, since she first moved to our school in 8th Grade. I've been thinking about approaching Danielle for a few days now, but I kept thinking "She's one of the most popular chicks in our grade, she probably won't even notice me.". However, today, I decided to take a stance and say "Man, screw this, I'm tired of being avoidant, I'm going to talk to Danielle!" and that, I did. Being insecure about my voice, I tapped her arm to get her attention and the conversation starts.
[I tap her shoulder lightly 'to get her attention' and go "Hey Danielle."]
Danielle: Uh, hey Mike.
Me: So you going to the carnival this Saturday?
Danielle: Uh, no I don't think I'll be able to go.
Me: Oh, well, that's cool.
Danielle: Yeah.
Me: So, uh, did you take the Algebra test yet?
Danielle: No, not yet .
Me: Oh, well, it's pretty easy. You'll do good on it.
Danielle: Uh, thanks.
Me: Well, see ya later.
Danielle: Bye.

[I engage in eye contact with her]
Me: Hey, Tina.
[Tina looks at me]
Me: Hey, Tina is it okay if I sit with you?
[Tina Smiles]
Tina: Sure!
[I sit down]
Me: So... how was school today?
Tina: Oh, good.
[Pause for a few seconds]
Me: So... what are you listening to?
Tina: [She stated a band name, but I can't remember the name of it.]
Me: Oh, that rock music?
[Tina nods]
Tina: Yep.

As you can see, I'm not very good at carrying on interest conversations and keeping a good interest level with women, I want to improve on that.

 

[Brak86]

your doing what takes the most balls....approaching. That conversation **** will come along by itself with practice.

just for more advice: When you mentioned that rock group you could have asked her what else she liked, has she ever been to their concert etc.

 

[The Master Disaster]

You don't wanna sound like a robot man

 

[Viper]

Originally posted by The Master Disaster
You don't wanna sound like a robot man

Exactly, that's why I want to want to be able to carry on more interesting conversations and build more interest.

 

[The Master Disaster]

Originally posted by Viper
Exactly, that's why I want to want to be able to carry on more interesting conversations and build more interest.

Don't plan conversations girls dig spontanous and she WANTS to direct the conversation. Just imagine she is driving your in the passenger seat. Just come up to her ask her a question/ something that relates to her. It's like blowing up a damn water (is like the conversation)she will twist and turn your raft (planned conversation) until its underwater so you have a better chance just flowing with the water without a raft.

 

[Smooth Player 056]

Ive been reading a lot into mystery's routines and gimmicks....they have helped me more than anything keep a convo going and keep her intruiged.......Plus when you recite your routines you will be mega confident. Let me point out why- in school when u do a speech report in front of the class dont u get a little adreniline and confident when you comming up to a point in your speech that is Very Funny or interesting?...and when they laugh it gives you more confidence for your next interesting/ funny topic?.........................well this is exactly what a routine does....its like a latter....it builds and builds confidence.

peace

 

[Viper]

Originally posted by The Master Disaster
Don't plan conversations girls dig spontanous and she WANTS to direct the conversation. Just imagine she is driving your in the passenger seat. Just come up to her ask her a question/ something that relates to her. It's like blowing up a damn water (is like the conversation)she will twist and turn your raft (planned conversation) until its underwater so you have a better chance just flowing with the water without a raft.

Yes, but in order to actual get a girl wanting to talk she has to be interested, if she's already interested, you've done the extra job, but if she's not, you have to build that interest, which I'm not good at doing. Trust me, I don't know where you are, but over here, girls will give you simple one word answers, until you actually have their interest, they won't, as you say, direct the conversation, unless you grab their interest first, as you can see in the convos I had with Tina and Danielle. Remember these are random girls, so I don't exactly don't anything about them yet.

 

[oakraiderz2]

Not to be negative but im betting youre not gonna do sh*t. Any takers? Sorry for the pessimism...im pulling for ya.

 

[Viper]

Originally posted by oakraiderz2
Not to be negative but im betting youre not gonna do sh*t. Any takers? Sorry for the pessimism...im pulling for ya.

Shut the hell up man seriously, I'm tired of hearing your unincouraging ****, unless you want to say something useful, stay out, god damn, you might of meant no offense, but I certainly did.
And yeah you know what? I won't do **** if I don't know how to build interest and know that I can't hold a good conversation, because I already know the outcome will be bad. In order to build interest and get better conversational skills, I have to somehow practice getting better at those. Now listen, I don't want friends, no, if I wanted friends I would've made this topic about friends, but this is simply about APPROACHING WOMEN.

 

[LikRetsam]

Viper, I know what's going on in your head. I know because I've seen it many times before. You're a chump. Not in the AFC sense that is all of this board, but in the sense that you not only are not taking action but you're pretenting that you are and can't come to terms with the fact that you aren't.

You're posting more and more. And it's not because you have more and more questions; it's because this is how you try to tell yourself you're doing something to move forward.

The truth of the matter is that you're not looking for change. You don't agree with this site and it's principles. Unfortunatly though, you're doing the same thing here that is screwing you in real life. The very thing that brought you to this site.

The first step to correcting a problem is acknowledging it's existance.

 

[Viper]

Originally posted by LikRetsam
Viper, I know what's going on in your head. I know because I've seen it many times before. You're a chump. Not in the AFC sense that is all of this board, but in the sense that you not only are not taking action but you're pretenting that you are and can't come to terms with the fact that you aren't.

You're posting more and more. And it's not because you have more and more questions; it's because this is how you try to tell yourself you're doing something to move forward.

The truth of the matter is that you're not looking for change. You don't agree with this site and it's principles. Unfortunatly though, you're doing the same thing here that is screwing you in real life. The very thing that brought you to this site.

The first step to correcting a problem is acknowledging it's existance.

The existance of what?
If no here wants to give advice, than I'll just have to take it the harder way and figure out how to build rapport myself. I'm going to get in a few approaches tommorow, nonetheless. What I want to eventually achieve is taking this hot blonde junior named Marissa to homecoming, but since that's in 3 days, that's certainly not happening, plus, good looking girl like that probably already has a date, with a guy that she's known for much longer and just because I disagree with your advice or a few people on this site, does not mean I disagree with the site. Sorry dude, but you're NOT ALL OF SOSUAVE FORUMS. Just because YOUR advice does not befenit to my situation, does not mean I disagree with the WHOLE ****ING SITE.

 

[Best friends? NAY]

Real conversation that creates attraction and interest dwells within us. What I think you are doing is the formall buisness talk which is just made to be polite conversation as eqitquit (wow my spelling is awsome).

You are communicating wrong. When you talk, talk like it means something. Talk like you're having a good time. Talk like THEIR having a good time.

BUT HOW? This is the tricky part.
...... LIVE IT, Actualy be having a good time. This is the part that took me years to be able to do. Their are long periods of time where nothing seemed to happen, then BANG a transformation.

Trust me I know what your going through. And you will almost never notice the differences in a short run. Every year I think man im doing awsome, and at the end of hte year I look back think how much better I am now.

Move things into a longer timeline. Have your goal to be good with the ladies when you are 20. You got the next 80 years ahead of you might as well spend the next few making sure their good.

You must open up your mind. Many things are possible that you don't think are possible.

BELIEVE you can talk to any girl and have a good conversation, I mean really believe it. Deep down inside of you, you must know you can.

 

[MystLk]

Viper, Any Approches yet?.....

and Best friends? NAY, your telling viper "You got the next 80 years ahead of you might as well spend the next few making sure their good. " what is that crap? tomorrow is not promised today, whenever there is an opportunity you should take control of it and go for it no questions about it and dont even start to overthink it or doubt yourself for 1sec...because when this happens, youve already lost.

 

[LikRetsam]

Anger is the result of sexual frustration Viper, and you're very angry.

 

[Best friends? NAY]

I never told him to not take action. Infact I think he should take every oportunity. What I reall mean is don't worry about the outcome of any one situation beacuse it doesn't matter. I think his problem is he doesn't want to mess up anyone interaction. The knowledge he will get when he isn't worried about messing up will be far better then getting that one girls phone number.

What I meant by that statement is think in larger terms then what is going to happen THAT interaction.

 

[DJ4Real]

I changed those two convos that you had to make them sound better. Pay close attention!

Danielle, I've been wanting to go out with this chick, since she first moved to our school in 8th Grade. I've been thinking about approaching Danielle for a few days now, but I kept thinking "She's one of the most popular chicks in our grade, she probably won't even notice me.". However, today, I decided to take a stance and say "Man, screw this, I'm tired of being avoidant, I'm going to talk to Danielle!" and that, I did. Being insecure about my voice, I tapped her arm to get her attention and the conversation starts.

[I tap her shoulder lightly 'to get her attention' and go "Hey Danielle."] (No TOUCHY!!!! just talk! no "tapping on arms"...just do a well layed out confident approach)
Danielle: Uh, hey Mike.
Me: *mimicing her* "Uhh!!!" what's up, *Uh!* Danielle.
Me: Question for you, *uh!* Danielle. Are you going to the carnival this weekend.
Danielle: Uh, no I don't think I'll be able to go.
Me: Well, that's sad for you. I might have asked you to go. But since you can't go, I'll just take *insert name*.
You: Well, adios *UH, Danielle!!*

Convo should have ended here. You made it worse by changing the subject like that. Next time end the conversation early and make her think about what she's missing!

Danielle: Yeah. (she sounds bored)
Me: So, uh, did you take the Algebra test yet? (what does this have to do with anything?)
Danielle: No, not yet .
Me: Oh, well, it's pretty easy. You'll do good on it. (You sound like her best guyfriend girlfriend here)
Danielle: Uh, thanks. (She's confused and she seems totally turned off by your approach)
Me: Well, see ya later. (You did one thing right, you ended the conversation first, but you extended it too much)
Danielle: Bye. (from the text, it doesn't sound like a passionate "bye", it sounds like a "ok whatever" kind of "bye".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------




quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[I engage in eye contact with her]
Me: What's up, Tina.
[Tina looks at me]
Me: *sit* (don't say anything, just sit)........ editted by DJ4Real
[Tina Smiles]
Tina: Sure! (you have just been approved to sit down after you asked her)
[I sit down]
Me: *smile and eye contact* (you originally asked her how school was, DON'T DO THAT to start off the convo!)
Tina: Oh, good. (She was probably thinking [can you please ask something more engaging]

Me: Do I hear your true " idol!" Britney Spears singing on that CD PLAYER? "hit me baby one more time?" (This question had much potential, but you asked it in a boring manner "So... what are you listening to?". Instead of doing what you did, make false claim about her, to make her talk and playfully argue with you. )

[Pause for a few seconds]<---(only pause for a couple of seconds)

*The convo would have gone in a different direction, a more flirtatious direction. With the original stuff you said, you once agian sounded like her girlfriend guyfriend!*

Tina: [She stated a band name, but I can't remember the name of it.] (This would have gone differently...she would have been shocked and more playful than this)
Me: Oh, that rock music? (is that the best you got?...if the convo went the right way, you could have said, "OH I WAS right it is Britney Spears "hit me baby one more time" is stamped right on your forehead:crackup:
[Tina nods] (Instead of her signaling bordem and nodding her head, she would have been all over you in a playful manner.)
Tina: Yep. ("I'm so bored, just please leave")

Compare my changes to that original stuff you had.

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Danielle, I've been wanting to go out with this chick, since she first moved to our school in 8th Grade. I've been thinking about approaching Danielle for a few days now, but I kept thinking "She's one of the most popular chicks in our grade, she probably won't even notice me.". However, today, I decided to take a stance and say "Man, screw this, I'm tired of being avoidant, I'm going to talk to Danielle!" and that, I did. Being insecure about my voice, I tapped her arm to get her attention and the conversation starts.
[I tap her shoulder lightly 'to get her attention' and go "Hey Danielle."]
Danielle: Uh, hey Mike.
Me: So you going to the carnival this Saturday?
Danielle: Uh, no I don't think I'll be able to go.
Me: Oh, well, that's cool.
Danielle: Yeah.
Me: So, uh, did you take the Algebra test yet?
Danielle: No, not yet .
Me: Oh, well, it's pretty easy. You'll do good on it.
Danielle: Uh, thanks.
Me: Well, see ya later.
Danielle: Bye.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------




quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[I engage in eye contact with her]
Me: Hey, Tina.
[Tina looks at me]
Me: Hey, Tina is it okay if I sit with you?
[Tina Smiles]
Tina: Sure!
[I sit down]
Me: So... how was school today?
Tina: Oh, good.
[Pause for a few seconds]
Me: So... what are you listening to?
Tina: [She stated a band name, but I can't remember the name of it.]
Me: Oh, that rock music?
[Tina nods]
Tina: Yep.

Work on you ****y and Funny!!!

Good Luck

 

[oakraiderz2]

Originally posted by Viper
Shut the hell up man seriously, I'm tired of hearing your unincouraging ****, unless you want to say something useful, stay out, god damn, you might of meant no offense, but I certainly did.
And yeah you know what? I won't do **** if I don't know how to build interest and know that I can't hold a good conversation, because I already know the outcome will be bad. In order to build interest and get better conversational skills, I have to somehow practice getting better at those. Now listen, I don't want friends, no, if I wanted friends I would've made this topic about friends, but this is simply about APPROACHING WOMEN.

Youre absolutly retarded. Do something about it if its bothering you. Im getting tired with seeing a new post by you every week, and im sure everyone else is too. So you suck at talking and you say you have to practice...practice means you have to do it. YOU HAVENT DONE SH*T!! Open up your ears and eyes, thatll help you with convos.

You need to listen to us. The fact that insult people who know what theyre talking about. Lik was right, you disregard what we tell you and insult us because youre a jackass. Im looking forword to your misdirected hostility...

 

[SlyD4rK]

Viper...i want to you to sign up for the Highschool DJ bootcamp. Hopefully it will change your attitude We plan to release it this Sunday....see the Thread on it for more details.

 

[Viper]

Originally posted by oakraiderz2
Youre absolutly retarded. Do something about it if its bothering you. Im getting tired with seeing a new post by you every week, and im sure everyone else is too. So you suck at talking and you say you have to practice...practice means you have to do it. YOU HAVENT DONE SH*T!! Open up your ears and eyes, thatll help you with convos.

You need to listen to us. The fact that insult people who know what theyre talking about. Lik was right, you disregard what we tell you and insult us because youre a jackass. Im looking forword to your misdirected hostility...

Your getting tired of seeing a new post every week, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT, no one's asking you to post, your choice to complain is of your own free will, no one's forcing you.
If you get tired of my topics, IGNORE THEM, DON'T POST IN THEM, because you know what? I'm tired of hearing you complain about it.

 

[Best friends? NAY]

"DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT" The best advice ever.
Now go out their and "DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT"