i'm getting killed at work....

[Delta]

so the girl i was going out with at work broke it off with me a while back and now she's going out with another guy (not from work thankfully)...

but i'm over-hearing about her personal life and where they're going together and stuff and it is just killing me. and the fact that she likes this relationship and is making her happy - it makes it worse for me.

the ideal way to get over someone is to just get away from them - out of sight out of mind. and for heaven's sakes, not hearing details about her personal life.

but i have to be around it constantly and while i've been doing ok for a few weeks, sometimes, like this week, it's just destroying me. fills me with self doubt and self loathing. all the useless thoughts that makes me question myself.
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when i asked her out, i was risking our friendship. but i'm glad. i sidestepped a LJBF! i gladly sacrifice the friendship at the altar of giving a relationship a try.

but the friendship is truly dead. she can't really sympathize with my suffering and certainly can't help - neither does she probably care - just wish that she didn't have to deal with fallout.

i certainly can't know about what's going on in her life.

the friendship is dead. but fine. as i said, it was worth it.

but dam/n it hurts. physically. almost feel like a panic attack sometimes.

i don't believe in god in any real sense but i spent a lot of time tonight just doubled up chanting help me help me help me.

i should quit. but i don't want to jeopardize my finances over this. argh. must look for a new job.

delta

 

[Tomatoes]

Look for new jobs....Also next time think before you dip your d!ck in the company ink.

It happens alot but people dont realise how dangerous it can be.



Sarge On!

 

[KarmaSutra]

i don't believe in god in any real sense but i spent a lot of time tonight just doubled up chanting help me help me help me.

delta

Doubled over as in a fetal position? Over a chick? I hope for your sake you're kidding. Brother, one-itis has infected every cell of your being. Hope you can kill it before it kills you. Might be too late though.

Best way to get over a woman is finding a new one. Keep spinnin'. . .

 

[Delta]

i think the thing about work dating is that nobody figures it'll end (badly). i know... stupid.

one-itis is one thing. i could probably be done with her if i didn't have to be in her presence. but having to be around your ex girl constantly as she's engaging in a new romance... that's not kid stuff anymore.

and not having avenues of further relationships myself, i'm knocked on my as/s.

i am not kidding. completely fetal. and desperate. heart pounding like it's gonna jump out of my chest. mind racing. feeling like i'm gonna die or wishing for it.

mock if you must.

delta

 

[blinkwatt]

i think the thing about work dating is that nobody figures it'll end (badly). i know... stupid.

one-itis is one thing. i could probably be done with her if i didn't have to be in her presence. but having to be around your ex girl constantly as she's engaging in a new romance... that's not kid stuff anymore.

A guy at work is laughed at because of the same thing. Went out with a chick from work and they broke up. Everyone talked,he cried, now no women at work takes him seriuosly.

 

[KarmaSutra]

i think the thing about work dating is that nobody figures it'll end (badly). i know... stupid.

one-itis is one thing. i could probably be done with her if i didn't have to be in her presence. but having to be around your ex girl constantly as she's engaging in a new romance... that's not kid stuff anymore.

and not having avenues of further relationships myself, i'm knocked on my as/s.

i am not kidding. completely fetal. and desperate. heart pounding like it's gonna jump out of my chest. mind racing. feeling like i'm gonna die or wishing for it.

mock if you must.

delta

Brother, I would never mock or kick a dog while he's down. My heart goes out to you. But not my sympathy. You need a good swift kick in the balls to wake up outta that fvckin' defeatist mindset you're living in.

Here it is:

SHE'S JUST A FVCKING CHICK YOU WORK WITH!

Were you planning "'til death do us part" with this cvnt? She absolutely believes she did the right thing by leaving you and I'd have to agree with her. Would you want to be with someone who reflected your behaviour? You talk all this smack about how you need to go after what you want regardless of what anyone thinks or how it affects you. Well jack, it's time to take your foot outta your mouth and head outta your ass and roll to the next girl.

I'm serious if you wanna talk about it let me know.

F.K.

 

[Distant Light]

lmao yo are you serious. :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

Your worried about a girl who is in her own relationship that has nothing to do with you. Tell me this Why haven't you found any new girls yet? What the hell do you care its just a girl. You have to change your jobs because of a girl give me a break. Stop fiending for her she is living her life while your there watching her life. Go out sarge and have fun stop worrying about this one girl.

Lmao Panic attack.

 

[BlackJackal]

Yea man dont change your job, esspecially if it's a good paying job over some babe man. If you're gonna deal with a woman from work, you should just see her as a temperary mistress and thats it. Move on with your life, be about your money when you're at work, and find another chick to pole/ get serious with and doesn't work with you.

 

[flexion_]

Well, let this be a lesson to you why NOT to date someone you work closely with....

Once you find someone new - you won't care. Its never easy - luckily time heals things like this.

 

[insanity]

my brother had the same thing happen to him and the sucky thing was, he lost his job and it was the girls fault. she went on like she was the victim and my brother just shrugged her off and ignored her and he ended up the loser and he didn't even start the battles.

she's knows telling everybody about how this new boyfriend is the best, is going to get back to you and make you feel like dirt. if you leave the company...she wins. find a new girl asap and live on my friend

 

[Delta]

karma,

you don't get it.

and if you understand life, you understand that EVERYONE is wounded if a relationship they cared about goes to crap.

and BECAUSE SOMEONE IS WOUNDED AFTERWARDS, does not mean that that wounded behavior existed BEFORE!

it's kinda like saying someone had tears in their eyes before they got slapped and so that's why they got slapped.
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but the exhortations to hang tough are valid....

i don't think the info leak is malicious... she's just living her life. but it still hurts.

but it's better today.

delta

 

[check_mate_kid_uk]

killed at work? well if your in the army, dont complain at us, complain to your governemnt.

 

[Delta]

brilliant.

also, some of you seem to understand, some do not.

this is NOT about me hanging on, clinging, being unable to next or oneitis.

i've let go. but constantly seeing her, working with her, talking with her... this is ILL-ADVISED for even the smoothest and impervious of djs.

i've nexted... but i can't get away.

anyway kids, seriously, let this be a warning - it may be worth the risk and if you want it, go for it. but if it goes bad, you are a captive audience to the blossoming of your own insanity.

delta

 

[Skydiver43127]

Toughen up!

 

[Delta]

it's life changing advice like that that gets me through the day.

may such comforting words find their way to you in your dark hours.

delta

 

[Tomatoes]

it's life changing advice like that that gets me through the day.

may such comforting words find their way to you in your dark hours.

delta

Gotta love the sarcasm.....i was thinking the same thing thow. You should have really quoted the post.

Sarge On!

 

[Skydiver43127]

it's life changing advice like that that gets me through the day.

may such comforting words find their way to you in your dark hours.

delta

You may not like the solution, but it's simple, it's permenent, and it's personally tested by me and many other people.

I'd really like to write a page or two about how it's not something the girl does to you, but something you do to yourself, and how you're clinging, even though it's only in your head, but I've got a movie to watch.

 

[piterx]

i am another victim of this chick at work thing..i will really consider it next time..i guess

 

[Delta]

sorry to hear it piterx. hang in there.

today was another tough day for me. and i can so clearly see how i would be fine if i didn't have to deal with her and her social life on a frickin' day to day basis.

ARGH!

but i am noticing that it depends on the day. one day can be utterly wretched and the next can be ok. so i guess one thing to realize is that it's not forever and it's not constant. if it's horrible today, wait it out. it'll be different tomorrow.

skydiver, you're just plain wrong. as wrong as a person can be about human nature.

kinda like telling a heroin addict who's trapped in a room with a kilo to just "toughen up".... or a food addict stuck at home with a fridge packed full of fatty comfort food to just hang tough.

the solution is to GET OUT! to stay as far away from the object of your attachment as possible. there are psychological brain imaging studies describing what goes on in the brain of someone who sees an ex. if there was ANY DEPTH OF FEELING WHATSOEVER, it's not just gonna go "poof". you need to get away.

and if you're trapped, you're truly fvcked. and "toughen up" really is as useful as not saying anything at all. it's so shockingly bankrupt of any and all value that it seriously boggles my mind. i can't imagine the thought process that would make someone think, "this is a good bit of advice regarding this situation".

delta

 

[Michele l'Arcangelo]

Yeah... start lookin for a new job... or just succeed at work... and work up the ladder. "Success is the best form of revenge."

Don't lose sleepover it... and don't lose hair over it. I'm sure you you'd look like sh.t when you lose sleep... and definitely look like sh.t when you lose hair over it.

Stress like this can make people lose hair.

Whatever. I'm probably too young to know... i guess.