Im dissapointed with life, with myself, with women and with so suave

[wise_mage]

hey fellow djs

sosuave didnt give me any answers. it just generated more questions. but Im mostly disaapointed with the first 3. actually I havent been to sosuave in 2 months or so.

u know. success with girls just doesnt come. and I feel comfortable talking to strange girls and doing cold approaches just out of the blue.

Im from mexico. Im tired of the women here. they are out of touch wih reality and they tire me. high manteinance and ****

anyway
today I went out with this american chick I met friday. we seemed to click very well together friday. I approached her out of the blue talked with her a while walked with her home and she walked me back downtown and she kissed me on the lips quickly when we said bye.

I see her today right. everythings going well and **** until I try to kiss her. then she totally freaks out says she needs her space and ****in walks away right there on the spot. I try to convince her not to while she is but its no use.

what the ****? now its the foreign hot white girls as well? what am I going to do?

now , Im tired of having to work for women and never reaping any rewards. I feel very depressed and tired.
the fact that I am a musician a rock musician none the less doesnt seem to help ironically.

its all really absurd. Im depressed about the whole ruine we call life. I really want to experience having sex u know. Im 20. I hink its no longer time for me to be a virgin. I am ready for sex.

the big problem I have is to find a good looking girl in this conseratve country who wants to have sex with me without having to work hard for it. why would I anyway? I believe that if a girl likes me and think Im hot me shell want to have sex with me the sooner the better. the mexican girls they might like u and think ur hot and want to have sex with you real bad but they wont u know.

but now an american girl dissapointed me too. so Im starting to think there sno way out. Im condemed to a life of sexual mediocrity if I dont change soon. when I found this site I was 17. almost 3 years later I have roughly kissed 15 girls, have had only one girlfriend <aand have had less action than most afcs who dont know what so suave teaches.

those 3 years have gone by in the blink of an eye. and soon Il be 23 and soon 26 and things cant keepo being like this. I need to start getting the women I want when I want them- like the women always get the men they want when they want them.
but they just seem so impossible. even the ugly ones think they are tood good for you. I ****in hate it.

Im so frustrated with all this failure. nothing ever changes.
so I can make cold approaches now without any trouble. great, girls still stand me up, run away when try to kiss them (the last 2 have done this) and dont have sex with me. yeah have their numbers sure. ja what good are those if they make up excuses not to meet you.

****. I dont get it. Im this awsome guy who is confident and is artistic and keeps in shape and constantly works on improving himself. I should be like shrouded with girls but instead they dont give me the time of the day. I know I can be succesful with women. I just dont know why Im not being right now.

it frustrates me especially cause Im so horny and Im tired of jacking off. I seriously need a girlfriend or a f.ckbuddy. its about time for me man. Im ****ing confused about everything. and i cant seem to concentrate on anything anymore

I need to ****. and i need some female energy in my life. some female contact and influence. an actual live girl that likes my company and my ****. now thats it.

Im fukin tired of being virgin and failing with girls depite all my talents and strengths

any suggestions?

wise

 

[AFK Protector]

It's not all about cold-approaches.

You're problem is patience. Just don't always think about pvssy. Think of them as another person. Just a normal person. You're frustrated hmm....well, you said it yourself. That's your problem. Learn to control your emotions. Criticize them.

 

[wise_mage]

dude I think of them as persons. persons who I , it just happnes ,
want to **** the genes out of them.

but the fact that I want their bodies doent mean I treat them like peaces of meat. I handle girls well in that way.
my mistakes are not that obvious. I make em see I like theiroutside for sexual purposes but I also let them see I care whats on the inside enough for it to make me decide if I do want the outside after all.


this is the thing thats driving me crazy. If i make a move to soon they freak out i dont then Im just a friend . ****!!!! nothing works

 

[DiSt0rTi0n_07]

I'll help you along man, and i'm sure alot of ppl here will help out.

Right now i'm thinkin maybe something is being done wrong, or we wouldn't have this problem...

Explain to us what you do when you talk with girls... A recent scenario/example that we could discuss. (You might be doing the smallest thing wrong and not even know it.)

Let us analyse your approach and we will see what you are doing right and what needs improvement.

 

[wise_mage]

I dont want to write that much but ok


I meet them I talk with them I get their number, I ask em out I try to kiss em. basically thats it.
like with this american chick.
I approach her, talk with her, make her laugh, make her sya she is glasd she met me, walk home with her,, we start kino, actually she starts kino and we hols hands a bit and hug and touch, this iother girl is calling me on the cellphone for some strange reason this girl that hadnt called me in 2 years a girl i asked ut but said she was busy and I wait for her at home she walk me back says bye to me by kissing me on the lips and hugging me I kiss her back. shes gone for the weeekend but calls me on sunday night to see If I still want to hang out on monday I say I do but I forgot aboutthis exam so It can only be at night. so I get off my exam next day and I call her her cellphoneis turned off I swing by her home she isnt there, I finally am aboutto give uo when I run into her at downtown shes walking with this other guy from her school. she hugs me real hard but she kisses me on the cheek this time. fine we talk a bit I **** up on my english a bit guess I was nervous I had been thinking about her very often during the weekend and I say ll call her next day. I see them walking away the guy has no contact with her.

I do we met up downtown shes there we walk we talk she laughs but not as much. we alk around I use kino, she doesnt touch me anymore though but she also doesnt mind me touching her shoulders and back and leg. after a while I grab her hand pull her toward me and try to kiss her she turns around her face, and starts saying no and that shesgot to go. she starts walking away I grab her by the hand and say try it and try to kiss her again she get even more pissed off says she need more space and walks away I follow her and ask her about the kiss in the mouth she says thats how pople say hi where she from (florida) I know thats bull**** I have been there. americans only say hi with handshakes. starts mumbling this **** about what a conservative counrty this is and says she need her space and walks away.

that just happened today. good enough for you dude?

 

[DiSt0rTi0n_07]

Sounds like you have everything in the interaction good, you have almost everything going properly except 2 things:

1. You are seeing/calling her way too often
2. You are rushing into it a bit.

This is just an opinion so my words aren't 100% correct.

Generally you want to get the number, wait at least 3 days before calling, set up a date, go on the date, and wait at least 3 days b4 calling her again.

I think the problem is that you have oneitis. You call her cell, you swing by her home... though it may not be your intention, desperation is shining through. You gotta reduce how often you see her and keep her wanting more.

Also, I think you gotta slow it down a little. I know she kissed you first but I don't think pulling her toward you and trying to kiss her is a good way to go about it. And also, do NOT force it. I'd say she thinks you are being obsessive.

To summarize my post,
-approach kissing different (if you want I can give some suggestions)
-call less, talk to other women as well and get rid of that dreaded oneitis
-and also don't try and make things happen. They will on their own and you will be happy they did.

 

[Player_Supreme]

Sosuave can't fix you. You can only fix yourself. And it doesn't happen over night.

Here are some things you did wrong with the white chick and probably all the other chicks.

1. you walked her where? and she walked you where? Your too available. You should not be spending a great deal of time with em. Leave em wanting more, and craving more.

2. Your too desperate and needy. You tried to stop the bytch from leaving after she said she needed more space? Let the ho, go. That should be the new mantra for this site. Or as Gunwitch says make the ho say no...I add then let her go.

3. You want to get laid, but you don't want to get laid. If you truely wanted to get laid you wouldn't be so conservative about it. Just go get laid and get the deed over with.

4. Quit wacking off so much also, and don't deny it.

5. Get some help for your psychological imbalances....you seriously need it cause your pretty fawked up kid...sorry to be so blunt. Your fawked-upness is pretty obvious by our report and words. What man get's depressed. Women get depressed. We get mad and do something. They sit and wait. We do things...that is a mans way. I didn't know that the feminizing of man has reached your country also...this I find shocking. Cause the Americanized mexican men are anything but feminine.

peace out

 

[Don Juanabbe]

4. Quit wacking off so much also, and don't deny it.

F*CK!!

*Tomato juice allover my f*cking monitor!*

Maybe wise-mage should go on Prozac.

I mean, seriously, what's with all the dudes on here getting depressed when they can't score?

Also, why are you doing all the chasing?

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by wise_mage
it frustrates me especially cause Im so horny and Im tired of jacking off. I seriously need a girlfriend or a f.ckbuddy. its about time for me man. Im ****ing confused about everything. and i cant seem to concentrate on anything anymore

I need to ****. and i need some female energy in my life. some female contact and influence. an actual live girl that likes my company and my ****. now thats it.

You don't NEED ****.

You don't need female energy in your life, you need MALE energy, YOUR energy. You need to stop holding your life all inside and trying to build up women like a resume. Start LIVING.

I hear you b!tching about being 25, 30, etc...I was doing the same thing yesterday. Then I realized that the future didn't exist. The whole pursuit of racking up accomplishments...houses, cars, families, dynasties, jobs, socio-financial success, girls, sexual conquests, it all means nothing. Your past is irrelevant. What do you get from "having had women" in the past? I've had sex in the past. Doesn't do me a damn bit of good right NOW. Trust me, reminiscing about a good bl0wj0b when you haven't had one in months is no fun.

The nature of human life is to be spent. Money, sex, success, family...all that stuff that you've been saving in the past and hoarding for the future...it all doesn't mean anything if you're not living life to the fullest right NOW.

STOP thinking about how great it's going to be the first time you have sex...because you're going to get nervous and go limp, or blow early, or something.

Sexuality is one of those things whose ultimate realization occurs NOW. Past sex is worthless, except when you're bragging or trying to win acceptance from your friends, both of which are loser-behaviors indicative of a weak will. Future sex is worthless because you haven't had it yet.

Let go of this worrying about your sexual past and sexual future. Seriously, it's only dragging you down and forcing you to bottle up your potential inside for fear of "wasting" it. F'ing WASTE it. Take some chances. Stop trying to control everyone and everything. Instead project yourself onto your present life situation and draw people by example.

If you want to be loved, be lovable.

 

[Dukester]

quite crying you fvcking baby! get over it. ya, life sux, but live w/ it.

you need to have confidence in yourself, you need to be happy! you cant make other's happy unless you are happy. dont be so dependent of girls, or sex.

plus you are trying toooooo hard, just relax, and let it come to ya naturally!

 

[wise_mage]

yeah guys - I know u are right in several stuff. I do probably need some psychological help. I do think I am emotionally and mentally unbalanced.

still I dont think I have oneitis. I am going out with this other girl tomorrow. Im taking it slow. she isnt foreign but shes awsome and hot. I think Ill even apply the u seem like ull make such a good friend line. I wont make a move or anything.
and friday Im mmeeting new ones to prevent oneitis.

I did comeout as needy by following her and **** fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!!!!! I just realized till u told me.
let the ho go man. now thats whats its all about totally.

now about what palyer supreme says in point number 3 about getting laid. I dont agree. I think I do want to get laid , there just happens to be no one around who I want to get laid with and also wants to get laid with me.

I also think maybe this foregin girls my age (20) are way too much women for me, since Im still a virgin and they porbably have had tons of guys already in bed and tons of sexual experience and life experience living on their own and stuff.

I will not whack off anymore period. although its hard with so much sexual frustration built up. how often do u suggest i whack off?

don juanwanabbe, Im doing all the chasing cause here girls dont chase guys. or at least they dont chase me. even if they want you, they want you to chase them.

u guys just dont get it. gettinggirls here is way harder to do than in america or europe. girls are way repressed here about tons of things, including chasing guys (apparently a lot of them think girls that chase guys are sluts) and having sex.

squirrels what do u mean IM holding my life all inside?
what do I get from having had women in the past? experience to get the women in the now and please them. its really simple.
expoerienc I dont have at this late age already cause of the whole situation at hand.

and what do u mean by this?

"Let go of this worrying about your sexual past and sexual future. Seriously, it's only dragging you down and forcing you to bottle up your potential inside for fear of "wasting" it. F'ing WASTE it. Take some chances. Stop trying to control everyone and everything. Instead project yourself onto your present life situation and draw people by example.

If you want to be loved, be lovable. "


could u maybe get intoi that a bit more so i can understand it better. I think ur right but Im not sure what ur talking about.

player supreme, she asked me to walk her home which was closeby. I wanted to spend time with her so i did. she walked me later back to town so i could go meet with other friends. if I was being too available which I dont know why I would be then she was being too. why is it that its wrong for me but not for her?
man Im not into playing game they watse too much energy.
I wanted to walk with her and talk to her so I did. I wanted to kiss her so I did. she didnt like it? well its a ****in shame. shes npot worth my time then . NEXT!

where am i ****ing wrong with this philosphy? u guys seem to be confusing the fact that Im confused with what happened and I want to know what i did wrong so I dont **** upagain on the future with some other girl with the fact that Im having oneitis and not being a challenge.

and player supreme, now getting depressed is feminine? u sosuave purists have fukin lost it. getting depressed is part of the human condition. on of the side effects of depression and insatisfaction is anger so those "manly" mexican men u talk about are probably more depressed with life than u think. they are either just too dumb to realize it or they cover it up on public with this macho charade. I know lots of people who do that. plus Im an artist so yeah Im prbably oversensitive. so what? Im freakin awsome and I like myself.

I gotta go, but those are my 2 cents on all of ur comments guys


tell me what u think about mine

 

[CLOONEY]

I agree wise, getting depressed is a human condition. PS sometimes shoots his mouth off a bit (no offence Player), but just because u dont get depressed, doesnt mean others dont!

However Wise, I do agree with Player, u need to do some soul searching. Find yourself and your confidence from within. Be happy and content with yourself first. U base too much on external things as do most from your city! U need to just let go of it and enjoy your life, once again, I would highly recommend once u are doing studying you get out of Queretaro. Most people I knew there were seriously fukced up in some way! Either depressed or so insecure with themselves they put on their arrogant front!

PS, I agree, from what I have seen of Americanised Mexican men, they are far more men. Most of the guys in Mexico, at least the guys who are middle to upper class are very soft. Their culture is now for them to open the car door for their girlfriends ALL THE TIME, pay for dates, give them flowers etc. lol, when I didnt do it for my Mexican X she was like WTF, but deep down she loved it!

 

[wolfie]

One of the greatest Pickup artists in the world, "26", gets his name from the fact that until he was 26 years old, he never f*cked, kissed or even HELD HANDS with a girl.
Then he changed himself into one of the greatest players around. If he can do it, you can do it. Stop being so weak and find a way.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by wise_mage
what do I get from having had women in the past? experience to get the women in the now and please them. its really simple.
expoerienc I dont have at this late age already cause of the whole situation at hand.

Let's not bullsh!t ourselves, here. "Lack of experience" isn't what you're upset about. You're upset about not being able to say, "Hey, I had sex with a woman!". You don't even KNOW how good you are because you've never done it. You want to be able to participate in the conversation when all your buddies talk about how girls are in the sack.

Unfortunately, that's the kind of thinking that gets you into this saver/consumer mindset instead of an investor mindset. You start trying to "buy" sex instead of "investing in" it. And that kind of leads into the second part of your question:

and what do u mean by this?

"Let go of this worrying about your sexual past and sexual future. Seriously, it's only dragging you down and forcing you to bottle up your potential inside for fear of "wasting" it. F'ing WASTE it. Take some chances. Stop trying to control everyone and everything. Instead project yourself onto your present life situation and draw people by example.

If you want to be loved, be lovable. "


could u maybe get intoi that a bit more so i can understand it better. I think ur right but Im not sure what ur talking about.

Look at the rich of the world...people like Bill Gates, Donald Trump, Warren Buffett, hell look at banks and financial institutions. Did they get rich through the saver/consumer mindset? Did they amass their wealth through planned and perfectly controlled transactions, saving up money and buying the things they wanted?

Hell no! They INVESTED. They took money they had and invested it in markets and business ideas and speculation...and other people took that money, made use of it, and grew from it, then gave it back to them in dividends. And none of those things were guaranteed. When you invest money in the stock market you're not PURCHASING a return on investment. You're taking a chance that you'll get more money in return.

Think of sexuality the same way. You can't expect to just save up all the DJ techniques and then "spend" them in one controlled transaction to get something sexual in return, complete with receipt and 30 day warranty. You have to take your sexuality and sexual energy and INVEST it in women, be willing to GIVE it to them and take a chance on them. And true, many of them will probably default and never be able to pay you in return. But you will also hit those that will grow from your investment of sexuality and will pay you dividends and capital gains unlike anything you've ever dreamed of!

But in order to do this, you must relinquish absolute control. Of course you protect your love as much as possible, you don't just GIVE it away, but eventually if you want to make anything you have to let go of the love, release it to someone else, and take the risk. Try it with one or two "safe bet" girls, maybe girls that are loose or not as good-looking/socially prized. As YOU grow, you, too, take the sexuality and invest it in OTHER women and move up until you basically own the world. You become to women what Bill Gates is to desktop computers.

If you've ever played the game Civilization by Sid Meier, you've noticed that you can work to amass huge armies, but if you never actually go start a war, you'll always have this sh!tty little empire that no one respects. Sure, if you DO go to war, you're going to sacrifice troops and equipment, but if you're afraid to launch that campaign, you'll never take your adversary's cities and you CERTAINLY will never conquer the world.

I sense you're afraid to exert any effort unless you've got a 100% chance of getting a decent return on your investment. It's like they say in Rounders, "You can't lose what you don't put on the table."

...but you can't WIN much either!

 

[X_DonTrini_X]

What I wanted to say was that you gotta Pick your head up SON, No not "That other one in your pants". You gotta get your confidence high, be egotistical, strut son, be a MAN.

 

[Blue Phoenix]

be egotistical?

be egotistical

WTF?

Being a man has nothin' to do with being egotistical. We should be a little "selfish" in terms of what we want to ourselves, and in our priorities. But being egotistical has more downside than good aspects. That's the way I see!

 

[joecollapoppa]

Next girl you hook up with, resist sex completely. With women, if you resist sex u usually get laid quicker. If she starts to kino you just stop her and say your celibate or something. she'll have to respect you. Then you have the control. Go out with her, flirt have fun but don't show your need to get laid. After rejecting kino for a while, give her a surprise kiss. make it good. If she asks why the change, tell her that she deserves it. Then boom you will get laid faster than a mower pulls grass up. Good luck. remember if you resist it, you will come

 

[crackhead]

youre still very young.. go boozing with some buddies.. go out and have fun

girls aint feelin dudes that arent havin fun

it still could be a while before you score, yes.. but being bummed about it just makes it worse.. its easier said than done.. but the only option is to find happiness and become comfortable with yourself

 

[TurboLover]

Originally posted by wise_mage
don juanwanabbe, Im doing all the chasing cause here girls dont chase guys. or at least they dont chase me. even if they want you, they want you to chase them.

I begg to differ. Maybe you have to stick out from the rest, dress nice and all. I been to Mexico to visit family, way down south close to a city called Celaya.

I will tell you that in some of these small towns lies some of the finest women in the world. I consider myself an average looking guy, but had girls looking at me like all the guys over here look at hot women. Some even approached me.

Could of been the way I dress, or they could tell I was from the U.S. I don't know but they were pretty forward.

 

[aBAzLLnA]

So, you've been on the boards for 3 years now, and yet, you haven't learned a single thing? You're "depression" shows it.

I think that it is pretty clear that the forum teaches men/young men to have fun. That's it, just have fun. When you actually start to have fun, the girls will fall into place (when I mean have fun, I don't mean sitting infront of your computer playing doom3 all day).

Crackhead says it perfectly:

youre still very young.. go boozing with some buddies.. go out and have fun

~ivan