I'm attracted to younger girls, but are they interested in older men?

soulforge

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Ty everyone whose commented so far. Everyone has been blunt, shared their anecdotal experience, perspectives, and have given helpful tips to my circumstance.

What I've noted is to keep fit, find opportunities at school, and dress sharp but age appropriate.

It is possible. Attraction to financial success begets gold diggers however.

Is the general consensus here that girls attracted to the mature man (35-40) are outliers?
They are the outliers or they are damaged.
 

pipeman84

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However some of these young girls who go for much older men, have daddy issues & are a little broken.
And some (the really smart ones) are looking for men who display real confidence, emotional stability and maturity, traits that guys in their 20s usually don't posses.
 

soulforge

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And some (the really smart ones) are looking for men who display real confidence, emotional stability and maturity, traits that guys in their 20s usually don't posses.
I find that the immigrant girls, tend to settle for an older man, as they want the stability and a meal ticket out of there situation.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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Ok gentlemen, pull up a chair, it's story telling time.

In the bustling tapestry of daily life, we meet Chadwick, a man who is wholeheartedly convinced of his unparalleled attractiveness to women. This conviction has become a shibboleth, an unyielding belief that clearly distinguishes him in his social circle, seemingly propelling him to a superior position in the realm of dating.

Yet, when Chadwick hears of Conrad's successful interactions with women, he finds himself on shaky ground. Acknowledging the truth in Conrad's stories would mean disassembling the core beliefs that Chadwick adheres to fervently. These narratives of Conrad's success aren't simply a blow to Chadwick's ego, but a threat to a foundational principle that undergirds his self-identity.

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Chadwick's narrative serves as a potent reminder of the dangers of clinging to personal beliefs too closely. It unveils how such convictions can foster testimonial injustice and widen empathy gaps, obstructing individuals from embracing the full spectrum of human experiences.

This story beckons us to cultivate a spirit of openness, encouraging us to evaluate narratives based on their intrinsic merit, moving beyond the confinements of entrenched beliefs and fostering a society grounded in mutual respect and understanding.
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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The narrative that women should date at their age range has one sole reason behind it: Because older men are not incentivized to date women their age, but younger women.

Women do not compete well, rejection isn't something they handle well, so what do they do? Simply, they GSRM. Seeing some of our fellow members take up this narrative is shameful.

 

Modern Man Advice

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It is definitely possible.

We've talked about this many times before. If you think something (age, height, etc) is a problem then it will be a problem. People, especially women, can detect when you are insecure about something.

Would I say girls that age are actually "interested" in older successful men? No. They might be curious or attracted but that is it.

I messed around with a girl who was 24 (I am in my mid-30s) and I could tell she was attracted but in the end, it was only gonna be a physical thing. Generally speaking, (I'm sure there might be an exception or two out there) I find it hard to mentally connect with someone that age, it is simply not stimulating. You are in two different worlds, both physiologically and socially.

Having said that, while it is possible it is not the norm. Girls that age stick to guys closer to their age range. So if you happen to sleep with a younger girl, know it's almost always a one-time deal.
 
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BeExcellent

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You guys are funny. I marry (not date) a man 8 years younger (because I can) and some of you guys flip out with the age shaming yourselves. Omg BE is a cougar, omg he should date a girl 15 years younger, etc. etc.

@Pierce.Manhammer is correct. Some here are totally blinded by faulty beliefs.
 

pipeman84

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I marry (not date) a man 8 years younger (because I can) and some of you guys flip out with the age shaming yourselves. Omg BE is a cougar, omg he should date a girl 15 years younger, etc. etc.
This lady managed to get herself a guy 23yrs younger. ;)
The director, 56, and actor, 33, met on the set of Nowhere Boy in 2009, when he was 18 and she was 42 and tied the knot in June 2012.
 

Dr.Suave

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You guys are funny. I marry (not date) a man 8 years younger (because I can) and some of you guys flip out with the age shaming yourselves. Omg BE is a cougar, omg he should date a girl 15 years younger, etc. etc.
But you are in fact a cougar/milf and most men should date younger. Doesnt mean we arent happy for you BE
 

sangheilios

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I've read a lot of your posts on here and you have this strange notion that other people are always wrong and you are always right, I don't understand what the point of being here is if your not gonna discuss, but dictate.

Im not trying to lambaste you because at least your not pairing insults with your ideas but open your mind a little bit.

Im looking at your statement: Women of this age don't find men of this age attractive... But all you've done is make this statement without explaining your rationale behind it. Fact of the matter is that any man of any age, past 18, can possess the traits of any man of any age, being handsome or attractive is not this thing based on age alone, it is a vector that people of all ages inhabit.

Another thing I want to to make clear to you, WE ARE THE OUTLIERS... What else would we be, what other reason would we have to be here if this wasn't the case? We are here to cultivate extraordinary opportunity for ourselves, not fall into this paradigm that everyone else neatly fits into.

Lighten up a bit, I'm the same age you are, I'm pulling 18 year olds all day.

Also, I'm gonna make a judgement here, your either a woman or raised by a single mother, this is putting you on a different vector of thinking than most other posters here, I'm leaning towards the former though, although I know you've claimed to be a dude, your post here pairs way too nicely with the feminine narrative, that being women should date around their age with no explanation as to why.
Yo, I'm just having a conversation with that other poster, you are looking far too deeply into this.

The facts are that it would be incredibly UNUSUAL for a man approaching 40, or even over it, to be able to pull a woman that is 18-22.

Think about a theoretical scenario where a guy that is 40 goes out to hit up the local nightlife and specifically targets women that are in their early 20s. Let's give this man the luxury of playing the numbers game, so we'll give him 10 nights out where there are an abundance of potential young women he could approach. What do you think the results would be from an experiment like this?

Let's use another experiment where a man like this uses OLD sites and apps, where he specifically messages women in this age range. Again, what do you think the results would be?

I'm not saying this to be mean or insult anyone, these are just facts that I'm discussing here. If a man was approaching 40 he is going to be wasting a lot of his time by going for women in such an age bracket and is very likely to have nothing to show for it. However, a man of this age that took care of himself, is fit, etc. could realistically still go for women that are around 27-32.

I don't think there is anything wrong with going for younger women, it's just that some of the expectations being discussed on here are honestly ridiculous. As I mentioned on my previous post, I also don't see why a 40 year old man would even want to go for women in the 18-22 bracket anyway. These women are going to be immature and annoying to deal with to where you should have literally NOTHING in common with them.
 
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sangheilios

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It is definitely possible.

We've talked about this many times before. If you think something (age, height, etc) is a problem then it will be a problem. People, especially women, can detect when you are insecure about something.

Would I say girls that age are actually "interested" in older successful men? No. They might be curious or attracted but that is it.

I messed around with a girl who was 24 (I am in my mid-30s) and I could tell she was attracted but in the end, it was only gonna be a physical thing. Generally speaking, (I'm sure there might be an exception or two out there) I find it hard to mentally connect with someone that age, it is simply not stimulating. You are in two different worlds, both physiologically and socially.

Having said that, while it is possible it is not the norm. Girls that age stick to guys closer to their age range. So if you happen to sleep with a younger girl, know it's almost always a one-time deal.
There's a huge difference between a guy in his mid 30s going for a woman that is 24 compared to say a (near) 40 year old going for a woman that is 18-22 lol. However, you are totally correct in that when there are large differences in age you are going to be completely separate existences and will have no commonality.
 

sangheilios

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Why would you want to have everything in common with her? You want differences as well as commonality regardless of age differences.
You are missing the point on that. The things you prioritize in your 30s and 40s will be totally alien to that of a person in their late teens and early 20s. People that are 18-22, so barely out of high school/college aged, are still trying to find their way in the world, discover themselves, experiment with life, etc. If you are in your 30s and 40s you are going to be prioritizing things like family, career success, enjoying personal time, etc. Women that are 18-22 are looking to have fun and excitement, a man that is 40 should be looking forward to having some personal time to himself, peace and quiet, etc. lol.

Seriously, what the hell would a 40 year old man an 18 year old woman talk about with each other? She's busy thinking about what college she might go to, maybe what sorority she will join, what party or nightlife venue she'll be going to this weekend, etc. I'll use myself as an example, and I'm 33 so a bit younger lol. I'd be busy thinking about my main job, investing/money, my side business, the gym, running errands, making dinner, sleeping/resting, etc. Totally different existences there.
 

SW15

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a (near) 40 year old going for a woman that is 18-22 lol. However, you are totally correct in that when there are large differences in age you are going to be completely separate existences and will have no commonality.
I also don't see why a 40 year old man would even want to go for women in the 18-22 bracket anyway. These women are going to be immature and annoying to deal with to where you should have literally NOTHING in common with them.
A 40 year old man wants to have sex with a woman who is 18-25. Sex and an attractive body is enough commonality for a lot of 40 year old men, especially childless 40 year old men.

Seriously, what the hell would a 40 year old man an 18 year old woman talk about with each other? She's busy thinking about what college she might go to, maybe what sorority she will join, what party or nightlife venue she'll be going to this weekend, etc.
Did you ever think that the 40 year old man is into partying, lifting weights, and having sex? That could be the commonality.


If an older man, 38-40s, was highly successful, would age still be a barrier to dating them? Would they give these men a chance to approach and open them?

Are younger girls, 18-22, generally attracted to "successful" men in their late 30s? Men who'd make a 7 figure income, are very fit, good looking for the age of late 30s early 40s, and have lived a little more life than younger men?
Yes, they would be. The problem is that most men in their 30s/early 40s are not that guy. That's why most men in their 30s/40s end up as pussie beggars for women who are close to their own ages.

Here is the reality of this.

Very few women in that age bracket would go for a man approaching 40. The exceptions to this would be things like having celebrity status or being incredibly wealthy in order to draw them in. The problem with using that particular approach is you are simply attracting gold diggers into your life and creating a sugar baby-sugar daddy type relationship. This is one of those things that is incredibly high maintenance and a potential recipe for disaster.
That's a big key for this. For men who are 35+ and want to go to 10+ years younger, money and status will have to help the cause. Good looks help too, but it's going to have to be a good looks + money play. A 22 year old woman can get good looks from a 22-27 year old man, but she likely can't get good looks + money/status from that 22-27 year old guy. That's where money + status can make the difference for the 35+ man.
 
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sangheilios

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A 40 year old man wants to have sex with a woman who is 18-25. Sex and an attractive body is enough commonality for a lot of 40 year old men, especially childless 40 year old men.



Did you ever think that the 40 year old man is into partying, lifting weights, and having sex? That could be the commonality.
LOL I mentioned that on my first post on here, where the only real reason a man this age should be going for such a young woman is purely just for sex.

Women in this age range don't need a 40 year old man for this. An "older" man for them would be a guy that is 25-32, not 40 lol. If a 40 year old was into partying it's going to be cringey AF, I just imagine this guy showing up to a frat party lol and trying to fit in haha.

Vast majority of men near or past 40 are vagina beggars, as you've stated many times on here, and for them to go for a woman so young is just delusional lol. I don't care about what people post on here, none of these posters on here in this age range are outliers like they claim to be and are along some spectrum of the norm or average for their age bracket. These results they talk about with substantially younger women are exaggerated at best or completely made up fantasies that they wish were a reality.
 

SW15

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I mentioned that on my first post on here, where the only real reason a man this age should be going for such a young woman is purely just for sex.

Women in this age range don't need a 40 year old man for this. An "older" man for them would be a guy that is 25-32, not 40 lol. If a 40 year old was into partying it's going to be cringey AF, I just imagine this guy showing up to a frat party lol and trying to fit in haha.

Vast majority of men near or past 40 are vagina beggars, as you've stated many times on here, and for them to go for a woman so young is just delusional lol. I don't care about what people post on here, none of these posters on here in this age range are outliers like they claim to be and are along some spectrum of the norm or average for their age bracket. These results they talk about with substantially younger women are exaggerated at best or completely made up fantasies that they wish were a reality.
40 year old men who are into partying aren't likely to show up to frat parties, but they could show up to bars where women who are 21-25 would show up.

A 6'0"+ guy with big muscles who is 40 could have some options with a 21-25 year old that he meets at a bar, or the gym, or even some other non-bar venues.

In most cases, the 40 year old who wants to go much younger is going to have to look good, have personality, be fit, and also have some money/status too.
 

sangheilios

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40 year old men who are into partying aren't likely to show up to frat parties, but they could show up to bars where women who are 21-25 would show up.

A 6'0"+ guy with big muscles who is 40 could have some options with a 21-25 year old that he meets at a bar, or the gym, or even some other non-bar venues.

In most cases, the 40 year old who wants to go much younger is going to have to look good, have personality, be fit, and also have some money/status too.
The OP and this thread was discussing the age bracket of 18-22, so college aged women. There is a huge difference here compared to women that are approaching 25.

I think if a man was fit and looked good for approaching 40 he'd be much better off going for women that are around 25 and older.
 

SW15

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The OP and this thread was discussing the age bracket of 18-22, so college aged women. There is a huge difference here compared to women that are approaching 25.

I think if a man was fit and looked good for approaching 40 he'd be much better off going for women that are around 25 and older.
18-20 is going to be the most difficult for a 35-40 year old because of a lack of access. It's possible to think of settings where a 35-40 year old man could interact with an 18-20 year old (grocery store near a college campus), but there are not many. It would be easier for the childless men 35-40 to pull this off. Men with children who are 35-40 typically have children under 10 and live different lifestyles.

35-40 year old men could meet 21-25 year old women at bars. Some 35-40 year old men don't like the same types of bars that 21-25 year olds like. At 35, pulling a 25 year old is a challenge without some money/status, but that's even more of a challenge at 40.

26-30 is more realistic for a man at 40. Even a 30 year old is considered an impressive get for a 40 year old man.
 

sangheilios

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18-20 is going to be the most difficult for a 35-40 year old because of a lack of access. It's possible to think of settings where a 35-40 year old man could interact with an 18-20 year old (grocery store near a college campus), but there are not many. It would be easier for the childless men 35-40 to pull this off. Men with children who are 35-40 typically have children under 10 and live different lifestyles.

35-40 year old men could meet 21-25 year old women at bars. Some 35-40 year old men don't like the same types of bars that 21-25 year olds like. At 35, pulling a 25 year old is a challenge without some money/status, but that's even more of a challenge at 40.

26-30 is more realistic for a man at 40. Even a 30 year old is considered an impressive get for a 40 year old man.
You understand exactly what I'm getting at. It's not impossible, but I believe some men need to be more realistic with their expectations in the dating market. The men that ignore these ideas are those that are chronically frustrated. The best thing a man should do is recognize his strengths and weaknesses, but also determine what market he is realistically able to play in, what types of women he can realistically attract, etc.

I'm 33 and taller and in better shape than the vast majority of men and not confident I could land women that much younger than me. I'm an outlier physically so if I have issues with this 99% of men near 40 will as well, assuming we aren't using money/status as a wild card.
 

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Yes, they would be. The problem is that most men in their 30s/early 40s are not that guy. That's why most men in their 30s/40s end up as pussie beggars for women who are close to their own ages.

That's a big key for this. For men who are 35+ and want to go to 10+ years younger, money and status will have to help the cause. Good looks help too, but it's going to have to be a good looks + money play. A 22 year old woman can get good looks from a 22-27 year old man, but she likely can't get good looks + money/status from that 22-27 year old guy. That's where money + status can make the difference for the 35+ man.
So status/finance does help? Can other people give their view on this?

By the way, SW15, I've seen you on other posts, and I'm glad you posted on mine. You have the signature phrase/motto "Most men 30+ are vagina beggars." I love it.
 
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