I'm 25, she's 18, need some serious advice

[backbreaker]

god dammit am I the only sane person here?


what's next? We gonna go to the Nusery ward at the hospital and start judging charcaters of cute baby girl newborns?

HOW ****ING CLEARER DO I HAVE TO BE. CHARACTER IS NOT SOMETHING YOU ARE BORN WITH. IT'S SOMETHING THAT IS DEVELOPED



Think of Character like Tits. Exect a woman doesn't start growing until she's in her low 20's.


Character isn't built at home, while your parents are watching TV and youa re on AIM. and she says all the right things, because she's not dumb.


Character is built (At the extreme earlist) when there is a keg party and her friends are all ****ing random guys, what is she doing?


Moreso, character is built when the protected envrioment of school is over. when she gets out there and has to fight for herself. when mommy and daddy are not looking over her every move to see is she doing right or wrong. That's when you start to see a person for who they are


not when they are ****ing 18.



If you are 25, I'm 24. I know some SMOKIN HOT 25 year olds. some would argue that that's when a woman "peeks". there is alot of 25 year old ass out there.

however, the quality 25 year old ass is out of your league. so you have to step down to the quality 18 year old ass, or so you think is quality.


This isn't a situtation where you are 40 and you are dating a 24 year old. both of you in that case have lived a little.

there isn't a catch I know, guy wise, including myself, that would touch an 18 year old with a 10 foot pole.

21 maybe. actually if she seems to ahve her head on straight, I'd give it a shot.

18? **** no.


the only reason you are in this situtation is because she's your only plate and you are not good enough, man enough, quality enough, to attract catches of your own age.

 

[PRMoon]

Bring her to vegas...




*pssst* I'm really trying to sell your girlfriend a fake ID ...oh wait, you said you wanted to be a cop?

 

[JDA70]

Sounds to me like you have one-itis.
If you get her e-mail address what are you going to say?
I thought so!
Man do yourself a favor, get out there and start dating
chicks. You should have so many numbers now that it
wouldn't even matter.

 

[sav]

pedobear

 

[wheelin&dealin]

If you are 25, I'm 24. I know some SMOKIN HOT 25 year olds. some would argue that that's when a woman "peeks". there is alot of 25 year old ass out there.

however, the quality 25 year old ass is out of your league. so you have to step down to the quality 18 year old ass, or so you think is quality.


This isn't a situtation where you are 40 and you are dating a 24 year old. both of you in that case have lived a little.

there isn't a catch I know, guy wise, including myself, that would touch an 18 year old with a 10 foot pole.

21 maybe. actually if she seems to ahve her head on straight, I'd give it a shot.

18? **** no.


the only reason you are in this situtation is because she's your only plate and you are not good enough, man enough, quality enough, to attract catches of your own age.

I completely disagree with you.

You can go out with all the old broads you like. The bottom line is that in a few years (barring no break-up) I'll have a girl in her early 20's and you'll have a 30 year-old fossil. Which would you rather have?

 

[Jaxon]

This girl is young, but she is serious about school and sounds like she has a good head on her shoulders. She is also at a very impressionable age... so now you actually may have the opportunity to establish something with her and make it strong and solid.... because frankly if you don't someone else will and you may kick yourself later.

Yeah she is 18 and has a lot to learn... but so what... this is exactly where you can fill in the spaces. You have a chance here to really cultivate something with this girl and potentially have a successful LTR which was built up, not traded for like most relationships.... does that make any sense?

Yeah man it makes perfect sense, that's pretty much what I've been thinking all along. She's like a moldable piece of clay in my hands that I can shape however I want! I'm exaggerating obviously but you get the idea.
That's pretty much what I would like to do is cultivate something with her and see what happens. If it turns out she's too immature, or not at all who I thought she was, then so be it. At least I checked it out, I'd rather be able to say that than to look at her when she's mega hot and successful a few years down the road and wonder what could have been. Because she WILL get a top tier dude, whether it's me or someone else.
Regret is the worst, and I try to live my life so that there aren't any situations that I look back on and think "damn..."

 

[Jaxon]

Hot, young chicks are the only way to go.

Look at it in a few years, you'll be 27, she'll be 21... and then apparently it's LESS CREEPY then?? That makes no f*ckin sense at all.

Get a hot young girl with an education to fall in love with you and you're set for life.

Amen brother!

(my parents are 10 years apart and still doing great btw)

 

[Boogie Nights]

18 is good to go my friend. It doesn't have to be a long term relationship but who knows? Compatibility is not always determined by age. Besides, you need to get that young action while you still can. Go for it!

 

[backbreaker]

I completely disagree with you.

You can go out with all the old broads you like. The bottom line is that in a few years (barring no break-up) I'll have a girl in her early 20's and you'll have a 30 year-old fossil. Which would you rather have?

1. I'm not so caught up in low self esteem where I have to have a 21 year old to validate myself. I couldn't be happier right now.


2. Technically, no you won't have a 21 year old, because she doesn't like you. if you did get her, you'd be the holding spot until some guy, a real one, came along when she's matured.


so the correct thinking will be I'll be ith my woman, you'd be jacking off because she left you.

and I promise you my GF is in better shape then your jack off material

 

[Moofahsa]

It is legal, knock it out

 

[Reyaj]

So Jaxon how about an update... did you email her... what happend?

 

[Fash]

Errrr.... what is so wrong with keeping her on ice while you have your own fun in the next couple of years?

I would say just play it cool, keep in touch with her. Call her from time to time. Whenever you are over in her town see her and vice versa!

Let things happen naturally. You never know, you might both not meet anyone nice in the next to years and end up together or you might meet the girl of your dreams and move on!

I see your point about the importance of knowing her family and her past. So just keep in touch with her. Trust me, if you show her your true intentions now, you are going to push her away because she won't be ready.

Ignore the bums on here who go on about the 25/18 thing! there is no rule. If being with her/around her feels good and she is mature and you guys click, there really isnt anything to worry about!

 

[Jaxon]

So Jaxon how about an update... did you email her... what happend?

Nothing yet, I thought about it and decided I'm really not feeling the random email so I'm trying to work another angle. I'm gonna be in her neighborhood this weekend for my cousin's wedding. I'm planning a "drop in" at her parents place, where she usually is on her off days. If she's not there then no biggie, I'm not in a rush, but I'll give you an update next week.

 

[Jaxon]

Errrr.... what is so wrong with keeping her on ice while you have your own fun in the next couple of years?

I would say just play it cool, keep in touch with her. Call her from time to time. Whenever you are over in her town see her and vice versa!

Let things happen naturally. You never know, you might both not meet anyone nice in the next to years and end up together or you might meet the girl of your dreams and move on!

I see your point about the importance of knowing her family and her past. So just keep in touch with her. Trust me, if you show her your true intentions now, you are going to push her away because she won't be ready.

Ignore the bums on here who go on about the 25/18 thing! there is no rule. If being with her/around her feels good and she is mature and you guys click, there really isnt anything to worry about!

That's good stuff man, thanks. And really that's what I want to do is keep in contact with her, see her from time to time when I'm in her neighborhood, basically just stay on her radar screen for a while.
Assuming that all goes well, she can decide if she wants it to go any further, but I ain't bringin' it up.
I figure if I can stay in her life then I've at least got a chance, and like you said if something else really good comes along then I'll go for it. I'm trying to keep my options open without possibly losing out on this one.

 

[Jaxon]

Aight so I went to the wedding and stopped by her folks' place but they were outta town. So nothing to report yet...I'll be up there again soon though and will try again.
It's not a huge deal to me but if something were to come of it, ya never know, could be cool.

 

[Omen]

You gotta be crazy... this girl just got out of high school, and you want a relationship with her. :kick:

Statistically, I think this has about a .2% chance of surviving.

58.3% of statistics are made up.

That's on the back of a HOOTERS wet napkin. lol

And to the poster who was 19 that said something is wrong with older guys who go for younger ones, nothing is wrong with it at all. You're just pissed that us older guys can take your girls, and that' usually when people 18 and 19 that are guys bring it up.

Heck, I like this girl who is 18 and that's the way it is. Do I like all of them? No, but this one I know, I like and dammit i'm gonna tell her. Well she knows, but the point is who cares.

Most the time, NO they dont work, so dont look too hard into it for a LTR. Can it work? Maybe, and you'll be the dude of her dreams and live happily ever after. EACH scenario is different.

Most the guys you talk too, and if you hit the older forum section will tell you they've had younger girls before. MANY, MANY, MANY have had them and will tell you nothing is wrong with it. The biggest thing is to not expect a REAL relationship. Again it does happen, but you cant rely on it to.

You can ask for all the advice on here you want, but YOU know the girl, and we dont. You know more than we do, and can maybe better judge. Its ultimately your choice.

I'll tell you one thing. If I like a woman, i'm gonna go for her, and i'm not going to wait for 100 people on a forum to give their opinion and tell me what to do. Its clear I like her, so there's my answer.

I hate liking a woman and not saying anything. That's worse than getting rejected. I want them to know, and I want to tell them. If I never tell this one girl, i'm gonna beat myself over the head, so i'm going to do it. And yes, she's 18 and i'm older than you.

When I first saw her, I thought she was much older than she was. So I liked her before I knew her real age, so just cause she is 18 and not 22 like I thought or something, i'm not going to go... Oh crap, she's younger, guess I dont like her then. Dropping her age down doesn't automatically make the fact I liked her go away.

The 18yr old I like.. If I take her out, and we have fun, GREAT. I'm not looking down the road though and going... Man I think i'm going to marry her, or I could. Take your time budd.

You can wait all you want, and time will still tick. I'm a believer in not waiting on things like that. Maybe i'll wait 2yrs to tell this girl I like her. No, i'm going to tell her NOW. And then i'll know she either likes me back or doesn't. And if it is a doesn't, I didn't just spend 2yrs of my life waiting on a she doesn't.

 

[Fink]

Go for it now and then you will know if she is interetsed or not. If you try and fail at least you know where you stand and can move on with your life. If you waite a couple of years she could meet some one, you will put your life on hold and for a mayby. Its now or never and if its ment to be it will happen.

Good luck

 

[NeverFear]

one thing you're forgetting

dude, one thing you're forgetting is that this girl is "ambitious".

You know, student council, going somewhere, and possibly feminist.

Her REAL goal is to gain power, and make a "contribution" to the world.

Nothing wrong with wanting to make an impact, but it sounds like you've got a career gal on your hands there, and that is a serious obstacle.

Unless she percieves that you are a ship she can sail with (think hillary clinton and bill clinton) she's not going anywhere with you.

You said you're non political? And she's utterly political.

move on.

 

[Jaxon]

dude, one thing you're forgetting is that this girl is "ambitious".

You know, student council, going somewhere, and possibly feminist.

Her REAL goal is to gain power, and make a "contribution" to the world.

Nothing wrong with wanting to make an impact, but it sounds like you've got a career gal on your hands there, and that is a serious obstacle.

Unless she percieves that you are a ship she can sail with (think hillary clinton and bill clinton) she's not going anywhere with you.

You said you're non political? And she's utterly political.

move on.

I don't remember saying anything about not being political. Anyway what I take from your post that you're anti-intelligent/motivated/educated women. Yes there are some that fit the bill that you described, but not all. You sound a little cynical.
I want to be with someone who has her own goals and ambitions. I want her to work to improve herself and advance her career. What I don't want is a woman that sits around the house all day and bases her happiness on me.

 

[blueguy]

...

I've dated 19 year olds too this year. This guy is talking about MARRYING a 19 year old he barely knows at 25. There IS a difference.