I'm 19 and my parents are making me pay rent

LiveFreeX

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I suppose I'm being too harsh as well but I'm speaking from personal experience also. I have a little brother who insists on drinking and smoking 90% of his time away, he is still in school getting his Masters or something but is very vocal about not wanting to work or get a job. His goal is to never stop going to school and live off my parents until they are dry, my parents are in their 70's and working hard to keep him and his lifestyle going.

I on the other hand, left school early, took up working and don't ask for one penny from my parents. Everything I have in the room around me, I bought... All the food I put in my mouth, I buy and any rent/bills, I pay. I don't look for handouts from anyone and I think at 19 you gotta learn that on your own or later you will grow up to be a 30 yearold spoiled, selfish, know it all prick like my little brother. 5string: I'm not sure what you went to Uni for, but my brother entered for the Arts and now you can't tell him anything. He drinks a star bucks coffee morning/after/evening along with his whiskey, beer and smokes that my parents all foot the bill for. They also pay for his rent when he's not at home and all of his education (they never paid for mine and I never asked). I don't know where he developed this attitude from but its as if the world owes him.

OP it would do you well to figure out how to survive and make it on your own two feet. Its even better if you do it somewhere that you have absolutely 0 safety net to catch you if you fall. I prefer living internationally because it keeps me responsible and goal focused.

When I think to myself should I buy an XBOX or put more money in my bank account just in case, the answer seems simple, bank it. If I was still at home, I probably wouldn't hesitate to buy the Xbox. I seriously question how many DJs/PUAs are not living out of their mom's basement?

I have another friend who has lived with his relatives for years until recently when they died. Well now he is forced to get a job and can't use that as an excuse anymore, he is not only fvked for money, he's actively seeking welfare and does not want to work (even though I've offered to get him a job here several times). He is an able bodied man who is well into his mid 30's and yet can't seem to get his act together...

Your parents are doing you a favor and later on you will be happy they did. Seek gainful employment before college, at least then, you'll know why you should be attending college and like 5string says, why it sucks to live out of a van (it does). You need to experience HUNGER first before you can truly understand it. It is a driving force.

BTW, women love a man who can take care of himself. More than anything, a man who is gainfully employed with his own apartment is more of a turn on to a woman than a 6 pack, bodybuilder who lives at home with mom and dad. Women seek money and stability and can you blame them? No one wants to marry a grown up child.
 

Ken785

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Bible_Belt said:
I would be mad enough to disown them as parents and literally never talk to them again. Tell them to have fun growing old and dying alone.

If they are demanding rent, then they are no longer your parents, they are landlords. You have the right to a signed lease that spells out each side's responsibilities. They must also conform to all applicable landlord tenant law in your state. Is your house zoned as a multiple family rental? It might not be. The law is a little different everywhere, but you do have a right to demand that certain necessities be in working order, or else you don't have to pay rent. They must also go through the steps of a legal eviction in order to get you out of the house. I would make them do it just out of spite.
I agree. His parents are being pretty ****ed up. Im Asian, so i guess this doesnt apply to me.

How i was raised was, my parents always took care of me when i was young and needed them. I never took advantage of them and only asked when i was struggling to pay rent and eat in college. Now that im better off, im helping them and always will.
 

dajinn

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LiveFreeX said:
*snip*

BTW, women love a man who can take care of himself. More than anything, a man who is gainfully employed with his own apartment is more of a turn on to a woman than a 6 pack, bodybuilder who lives at home with mom and dad. Women seek money and stability and can you blame them? No one wants to marry a grown up child.
I mean, your first mistake was implying women are even worth dating or having a "gainful" relationship with in the first place. Pfft, marriage? Heh. Sh!t's archaic.
 

dajinn

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Ken785 said:
I agree. His parents are being pretty ****ed up. Im Asian, so i guess this doesnt apply to me.

How i was raised was, my parents always took care of me when i was young and needed them. I never took advantage of them and only asked when i was struggling to pay rent and eat in college. Now that im better off, im helping them and always will.
I agree with Ken and the guy he is quoting. I think a lot of people are blowing this way out of proportion. I don't doubt that OP understands there are lessons to be learned in life about being independent but I don't think extorting money out of your kids is a way to teach them. If I had a kid that I had raised well to be a decent human being, who at least made different attempts in life at wanting to further himself either by going to college after high school, or learning a trade, or whatever and circumstances just arose that got the better of him, I would be happy to help and would want to see him or her get back on his or her feet again, and I would rather him keep whatever money he earned to see him succeed.

It doesn't sound at all like OP is trying to take advantage of his parents, or live the life style of someone who is always going to school and drinking daily and smoking them cuban cigs, etc. Just a normal guy who wants to try and go his own way but is being stepped on under the needless pressure of having to pay his parent's "hidden fees".. Typically when parents charge rent it is an unfortunately unsung sociopathic tendency; that is, they probably know someone who charges their kid(s) rent therefore the justification, or success, is measured by the fact that someone else is or has done it, therefore it must be okay for the parent to charge him rent, regardless of any realities, or facts, or circumstances.

Honestly, in their letter to him:

The amount we are asking for is nowhere close to the actual costs we spend to provide for you
Is a damn joke and that makes me have a hearty lel.
 
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LiveFreeX

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mean, your first mistake was implying women are even worth dating or having a "gainful" relationship with in the first place. Pfft, marriage? Heh. Sh!t's archaic.
Your first mistake was being an a$$hole.

You are an extremely un-greatful young man... everything costs money. You think you are living at home for free?

Rent, Food, Car, Car insurance, Bus tickets, Water, Electricity.... if you think this stuff is free, you have another thing coming.

The best way to show gratitude is to give back. You want to show your parents you are successful in life? Be able to do it on your own.

You should be happy your parents didn't leave you in a dumpster, with that attitude, its where you belong.

The OP's parents are showing tough love and he will be forced to grow because of it. Otherwise he will end up a failure to launch like my youngest brother. $250 is very reasonable, its much less than I pay for an apartment and I live in Asia. I will have my kids out at 16 working and they'll be paying for the entirety of their schooling + rent as soon as they hit 18.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

Ken785

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LiveFreeX said:
Your first mistake was being an a$$hole.

You are an extremely un-greatful young man... everything costs money. You think you are living at home for free?

Rent, Food, Car, Car insurance, Bus tickets, Water, Electricity.... if you think this stuff is free, you have another thing coming.

The best way to show gratitude is to give back. You want to show your parents you are successful in life? Be able to do it on your own.

You should be happy your parents didn't leave you in a dumpster, with that attitude, its where you belong.

The OP's parents are showing tough love and he will be forced to grow because of it. Otherwise he will end up a failure to launch like my youngest brother. $250 is very reasonable, its much less than I pay for an apartment and I live in Asia. I will have my kids out at 16 working and they'll be paying for the entirety of their schooling + rent as soon as they hit 18.
I think treating your kids that way when they're that young is just a guaranteed one way ticket to a nursing home for you when you're elderly. Just my opinion.
 
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