If your end goal is a stable, nice family with a loving wife; what is the best way to achieve this?

[jacketrunner]

The problem is the fact you want a family now. You don't want it for you, you want it for your reputation. You want your reputation to change. It's an image thing, not an inner "corporate" thing you always wanted. You can't party through your 20s and instantly have a family in your thirties. That's why you figure out early in life what you want and you dedicated yourself to making the choices that raise your chances of getting that. You sound like a woman now "I rode the CC through my twenties, but I wanna settle down now, yay!"

No it’s not an image thing. It’s that I want to do something more meaningful and less hedonistic. I want little versions of me running around.

Everyone wants to settle down eventually.

 

[jacketrunner]

Yeah, I'm going deeper than you are, buddy. 10+ years of doing the same thing leaves a mark on you. What does it say about a person when he "parties hard"? Can't imagine he's a quality lad overall and can't see him completely and 360 degrees changing himself into a family man.

You didn't get my point at all. Of course he can find someone and start a family, but I don't see quality in all this. I don't see quality in this man because no quality man would spend the most full of energy period of his life with something as shallow as partying, I don't see quality in the woman who would engage such a man to start a family and I don't see quality in the offspring coming out of this possible couple cause you can deviate genetics 10/15 percent, but you can't avoid it.

I speak by my standard of living and having a family, apparently what is important to you is that one just has it, disregarding the quality of its chances of failure.

What do “quality” men do? When I’m not partying, I’m actually reading lots of books, going to the gym, art museums, etc.

The partying is

 

[jacketrunner]

The partying is a weekend thing right now, but I feel like I spend my time in more quality ways than the average guy who watches Netflix, Sports, or plays video games.

 

[lizardking82]

Listen, man. I am not trying to pin you down or attack you. The thing you stated was that you wanna go from a party hard type of guy to a family man. That's the equivalent of making a ***** into a housewife. The only case I saw that "work" was with Lester's girlfrind in the TV show "The Wire"

 

[jacketrunner]

Listen, man. I am not trying to pin you down or attack you. The thing you stated was that you wanna go from a party hard type of guy to a family man. That's the equivalent of making a ***** into a housewife. The only case I saw that "work" was with Lester's girlfrind in the TV show "The Wire"

Lol this forum is corrupting me more than any partying I’ve done.

I actually held really idealistic views on monogamous relationships before I came here.

Now, I’ve just had tons of people telling me my gf is cheating and I need to cheat in response haha.

 

[Fzatf]

But you still have a child. An heir to your throne. I have no child myself and have no biological print in this world to perpetuate myself genetically to the next generation. You now have a small version of yourself that exists. A child. That in itself is not a big deal to you?

I love my daughter and am happy she is a part of my life; however, I wish my marriage hadn't ended how it did. I thought I would have my family together rather than apart.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I love my daughter and am happy she is a part of my life; however, I wish my marriage hadn't ended how it did. I thought I would have my family together rather than apart.

What was your other choice? Hang in there and be a sacrificial lamb?

Part of what we do for our children is give them good examples. We should give a good example for a relationship.

 

[El Payaso]

The best way to achieve this is moving overseas to a more conservative place like Asia, South America or Africa because you're not gonna find those types of women in the US.

Even if you do find one, she'll always have you by the balls because she can easily take away your kids and wealth at the drop of a hat.

 

[R.U.G.]

Lol this forum is corrupting me more than any partying I’ve done.

I actually held really idealistic views on monogamous relationships before I came here.

Now, I’ve just had tons of people telling me my gf is cheating and I need to cheat in response haha.

Just trying to bring you back to Earth with the realities of life in the USA. Listen to others who've gone through it and proceed accordingly. Only you can make that decision, but at least you have some knowledge to help guide you in your own path.

 

[highSpeed]

Maybe, maybe not. Usually, when women are nearing the youthful expiration date, they settle. This bro makes Yokozuna fit. Amazes me that any city allows their police to be not just overweight, but obese. Anyways, I am sure the bro is happy to get something, she was good in bed, but a complete b!itch outside the bedroom.

Anyways, gentlemen, you select the blue pill, and you can also be the chump like hubby # 2 of this wonderful peach of a woman. It sucks, but this is reality. If you think getting a Catholic, Jewish, Muslim, Christian or any "religious" backed woman to be subservient and work on the marriage, you are fooling yourself. However, Jewish women usually have a nice rack and suck a really good d!ck. Christians/Catholics are usually nuts in the sack. Muslims are known for loving anal. So, if you look at it that way, they all have some pluses. Then again, you can have an about-face after the contract is signed and she thinks she got you. My ex-wife was a devout Catholic (blond hair / blue eyes 34DD t!ts). Sex started drying up about a year after marriage. Before marriage, anytime day, night, public, private. Gave it another year, got worse, filed for divorce and kicked her out of my house with my police force friends escorting her and her parents off my property. After that ordeal, I knew the marriage and divorce institutions were a sham. Never again.

I do think you're right, it is about fooling yourself. I wanted that dream woman, you know, the one that is the hooker in the bedroom, takes care of the kids and takes care of you. Those women simply don't exist anymore, maybe they never did. I fooled myself twice, I literally signed the contract twice, even after my first trainwreck of a marriage. I thought, it's not possible to repeat another crazy woman right? Nope, I was wrong. What I've learned, mostly too late, is that they're all crazy in one way or another, to some degree or another. There is the super rare woman who gets it but they are truly a rare specimen. No sense in looking for the rare specimen, might as well grab as many of the local flowers as possible. They smell good, they look good but once you pick them, they dry up on you pretty quick.

There is no point to marriage anymore, especially in today's modern day situation for men. You work, they play and when they're ready to check out and move on to the next chump, they take half your sh*t with them and the kids. Yep, there's your family court equity.

 

[corrector]

It is interesting that I've read somewhere that a woman's value to a man is her loyalty. That is she doesn't cheat, or leave the marriage/divorce. The best people can advise to get such a woman is to look in a more conservative country and say all the women here are gone, including churches where they are just closet materialistic women wearing religious garb (i.e. hence the case with my ex-wife). Advise is to get more options or plates. But it just points that there is absolutely no loyalty to be expected from a woman, which means you can't trust them. I don't know how deep a relationship with anyone can be if any woman is viewed as a potential cheater or deserter and her displayed interest and professions of love at the moment is eventually going to be part of a "fake woman", or "like any other shallow girl" in your future timeline. Sometimes I confuse myself on whether I'm really incel or MGTOW monk-mode with this type of thinking.

I think an incel at least has more hope that they could be missing something but can't get it because no one is really giving him a chance since he can't pass the initial social barriers (i.e. approach/social anxiety) or sh1t tests/b1tch shields if they do haphazardly go somewhere. I still think there is enough hope somewhere inside of me to entertain the idea of marrying again and that it could all work out. However, the ex-wife I had dealt with, seemed very proper at the time and like everything you would expect in a non-materalistic type of girl that was sincere. If she failed, then it's hard to believe someone else would not. It's like someone going to a conservative country and getting a real traditional woman, whole 9 yards, and it still ends in divorce anyway for a stupid reason. When you have experiences like that, where you can't write it off to saying, well, what did I expect dealing with this hot materialistic woman anyway, but they were good and loyal types before you got married, then how do you recover from that and believe any woman again?

 

[jacketrunner]

It is interesting that I've read somewhere that a woman's value to a man is her loyalty. That is she doesn't cheat, or leave the marriage/divorce. The best people can advise to get such a woman is to look in a more conservative country and say all the women here are gone, including churches where they are just closet materialistic women wearing religious garb (i.e. hence the case with my ex-wife). Advise is to get more options or plates. But it just points that there is absolutely no loyalty to be expected from a woman, which means you can't trust them. I don't know how deep a relationship with anyone can be if any woman is viewed as a potential cheater or deserter and her displayed interest and professions of love at the moment is eventually going to be part of a "fake woman", or "like any other shallow girl" in your future timeline. Sometimes I confuse myself on whether I'm really incel or MGTOW monk-mode with this type of thinking.

I think an incel at least has more hope that they could be missing something but can't get it because no one is really giving him a chance since he can't pass the initial social barriers (i.e. approach/social anxiety) or sh1t tests/b1tch shields if they do haphazardly go somewhere. I still think there is enough hope somewhere inside of me to entertain the idea of marrying again and that it could all work out. However, the ex-wife I had dealt with, seemed very proper at the time and like everything you would expect in a non-materalistic type of girl that was sincere. If she failed, then it's hard to believe someone else would not. It's like someone going to a conservative country and getting a real traditional woman, whole 9 yards, and it still ends in divorce anyway for a stupid reason. When you have experiences like that, where you can't write it off to saying, well, what did I expect dealing with this hot materialistic woman anyway, but they were good and loyal types before you got married, then how do you recover from that and believe any woman again?

Some woman can be loyal. My brother’s gf of 6 years is definitely loyal.

She is pretty needy though.

 

[lizardking82]

Some woman can be loyal. My brother’s gf of 6 years is definitely loyal.

She is pretty needy though.

Than she;s loyal to her needs, not to him.

 

[jacketrunner]

Than she;s loyal to her needs, not to him.

Well in a way we all are. She’s really smart and you can have a mature conversation with her and see that she has moral principles.

Girls are people too. Many of them will not cheat.

 

[Konada]

One piece of advice:

Focus on being a whole person first. Because if that girl comes and you have not done enough self work to attract her, you won't even meet her or even cross your radar.

 

[AJ84]

Than she;s loyal to her needs, not to him.

What? Who isn’t loyal to their needs? That’s everyone unless they are robots. When I read the reasons here of why guys want a gf, 99.9 percent of them are about how she can meet his needs. Everyone wants their needs met and a main reason why relationships end is because those needs are not being met. This is relationship 101.