If you wanna tell your girl you LOVE her, read this.

[ARK]

ARK checklist:
Do you always have fun together?
Yes.

Is sex fantastic and readily available whenever you want it?
All we have really done is long make out sessions. From what I have gathered about her, she is a virgin and wants to wait until marriage.

Does she act submissive and girly (this is obviously more of a giveaway with older women)?
Yes, definitely.

Does she drape herself over you when you sit together?
Yes, most definitely.

Does she trust and respect your decisions, attitudes and actions?
Yes, I would say so. She told me she feels safe with me.

Does she gaze at you with a contented smile?
Yes.

Is she always available when you want to spend time with her? (Note: this should always be on your terms, and don't overdo it. I see my girl at weekends only.)
Yes. Everytime I've asked she has taken me up on it unless she had a prior engagement.

Does she always want to be at your side in a social setting (ie not with other guys)?
She seems to, though we really haven't been at a social event such as a bar.

Have you consistently and effortlessly impressed her with something (creativity, social ability, sports)?
I would say so. She seems to be impressed by me each time we do something.

Does she hang on your every word?
Yes.

Does she contact you as often as you like her to?
Yes.

Does she trust that you wouldn't cheat on her?
I think so.

Originally posted by Hellboy
If all of these things ars consistent for a prolonged period of time (I waited 10 weeks) then congratulations, she's in love with you! If she hasn't told you, she's gagging for you to tell her.

We've been dating for 11 weeks now. So far we have only done things on the weekend. She lives an hour away from me.

 

[CLOONEY]

HellBoy, this is a great thread. Finally, some more grown up guys who know about relationships! The dos and the donts. I agree 100% with what you say in this thread.

The only thing is you definately have to be careful, and as far as the "tell her you love her" part, I dont think you need the checklist, you can just tell if a girl loves you or not, and you should have some small talks about it and you can gauge the interest from them. Then try manipulate her into saying it (not an evil manipulation, just "plant the seed" and steer her into saying it).

 

[Climax]

My 2c....

1st of all....

Hellboy: Nice thread, props

And just a thing I would like to mention.... about the "I love you" ... From what I have gathered is that its not just saying "I love you" to a girl that is the big deal, its the fact that a lot of women (and men in some cases) are SCARED of this thing called "love"... may it be because they have had bad experienced with it in the past, or that they just aren’t ready for it, or are scared of it because they have not experienced it yet.... That’s why I think that saying those 3 words (I love you) should kind of be told with warning... So in other words, don’t rush to say it to her, it might scare her off... rather make her fall in love with you, and when you can SEE that she is ready for it, THEN only bring love into the picture.

This also depends on the girl as an individual... some girls might be ok with you telling them that u love them after a month, some may take a year, or even longer? ... I have a girl friend that is with a guy at the moment, and she has been with him for nearly 2 years now, and they have STILL not told one another that they LOVE each other... yes, when I talk to her though, she DOES tell me that she will not tell him she loves him unless he tells it to her 1st, but she sure as hell SHOWS him that she loves him, in her case, its HIM that’s not ready for love.... but the bottom line, is that when u are INVOLVED with a girl, the 2 of you should FEEL the "love" by the time u tell one another that you love each other.

No one is going to tell a girl that he loves her (or visa versa) if they can see that the love between the 2 of them does not yet exist, love is something that builds up slowly within us, and then gets stronger and stronger as long as we FUEL it, and it goes away in a similar manner, if you don’t fuel the love by doing things like you all mentioned above, the love/passion/attraction/longing will slowly disappear.

So over all... its not really those words that make the difference, it’s the FEELING that the 2 of you CREATE that makes the difference, and when the FEELINGS/EMOTIONS etc are created, love comes naturally.


Laterz…

 

[frivolousz21]

checklist:
Do you always have fun together?

More than I ever have with any women ive ever dated..pretty amazing Hellboy

Is sex fantastic and readily available whenever you want it?

we havent had sex..but have gone very far she is a virgin too..but when we get together...the passion is amazing...I mean she freaking licks me like a popsicle

Does she act submissive and girly (this is obviously more of a giveaway with older women)?

im not sure...she is def a women type...but I dont think she acts so submissive...but yes she does as in.will do whatever I want.

Does she drape herself over you when you sit together?

yes

Does she trust and respect your decisions, attitudes and actions?


she thinks Im amazing.

Does she gaze at you with a contented smile?

she is constantly smiling at me.

Is she always available when you want to spend time with her? (Note: this should always be on your terms, and don't overdo it. I see my girl at weekends only.)

yes....well we have a pretty good planned times to see each other..about 3 to 4 days a per week.


Does she always want to be at your side in a social setting (ie not with other guys)?

yes, we went to a dance club(country) and they played slow songs..and she didnt know I was there yet..and she decided to sit out because she didnt want to without me
now I dont care about that..but hey she did it.

Have you consistently and effortlessly impressed her with something (creativity, social ability, sports)?

most def yes


im going to stop there...it looks like im good to go

she is a wonderful women..and if she left today I wont lie id be crushed.

but thats the RISK u take.

this is real...no shyt test, no games, no lies.

this is the real deal and its amazing.

 

[frivolousz21]

No one is going to tell a girl that he loves her (or visa versa) if they can see that the love between the 2 of them does not yet exist, love is something that builds up slowly within us, and then gets stronger and stronger as long as we FUEL it, and it goes away in a similar manner, if you don’t fuel the love by doing things like you all mentioned above, the love/passion/attraction/longing will slowly disappear.

for being 19 that is great.


100000 percent true.

fuel the beast and it will grow and grow and grow

 

[ARK]

Great thread guys.

 

[frivolousz21]

ARK-

if there is 1 thing of advice I can give you.

just let it go..completely

my gf is a virgin..but I always bring sex in when I can.



she wont be waiting till marriage.

 

[Hellboy]

Re: My 2c....

Originally posted by ~ªêQµïTª$~
So in other words, don’t rush to say it to her, it might scare her off... rather make her fall in love with you, and when you can SEE that she is ready for it, THEN only bring love into the picture.

Bravo! That is exactly the sentiment behind this thread. Everything you said I agree with 100%.

With my relationship, we both started saying things like "I love spending time with you", or "I love being in your arms"... It was "I love this...", "I love that...". We were both skating around the issue and we both knew what we were getting at, but stopped short of actually saying it, because of the reasons in your first paragraph. We reached a stalemate where we were both afraid of our feelings because of past relationships and for fear of scaring the other person away. I almost ruined things by trying to distance myself... and things went downhill for a few days.

Then on her birthday I gave her a love letter. Here's an extract:
"I think we both have a lot of stigma attached to the word love. It’s like, we both think, as soon as we utter the sacred word we simultaneously erect a precarious leaning tower of emotions, ready to crash down on us at any second and crush our spirits to dust. A very realistic possibility based on past experiences. Not only do we open ourselves emotionally to being crushed, but with is comes the heavy responsibility that we could inflict the same pain on the other person. So what to do?

Here is my take on it. It doesn’t have to be this way. Since the start of our relationship we have been painfully honest with each other, and now I feel as if I’m taking that away a little. I haven’t been honest because there’s something I haven’t told you. Assuming that is, that I have experienced the real you, and you’ve not pretended to be something else. You’re kind, affectionate, thoughtful, caring, creative, intelligent, stylish, funny, honest and adventurous. Hey, I also just described the way you make me feel about myself! We are very similar in the way we look at life, and the way we like to spend our time, and the way we treat each other. The truth is, based on my own definition, I do love you. And I think we feel the same way about each other."

Afterwards she curled up on my lap and told me she felt the same way. Since then our relationship has got back on track big time.

Tonight we're going to see Romeo & Juliet. Then tomorrow, we are going on holiday for a week. This will be the longest continuous amount of time we have spent together. Now, every time I have done this with girls in the past we ended up arguing at least some of the time. It will be interesting to see how things go with this girl. We haven't argued a single time in the whole 10 weeks we've been together. I'll let you know how things go when I get back

Until then, good luck to the players and the lovers.

 

[ARK]

Wow Hellboy.. that was a great note. Are you going to copyright that?

 

[Plain & Simple]

jesus christ! i just printed that note.

Dont ask me for what

oh and yeah hellboy make sure you update us on how it went, im very curious about it

 

[CLOONEY]

~ªêQµïTª$~, Man very very insightful for a 19 year old. I agree 100% also. You see a lot of couples not fueling the relationship (the exact words I use), and as you say, it just goes down and down. This is where a lot of the guys on this board fukc up, cause they just play a lot of games and never get to experience whats its like to truly be in love, happy and content.

HellBoy, haha, yeah I kno what you mean, but argueing is good, and you have to establish this in the relationship with her. I always tell the girls I am with that I love argueing/debating (which I do), it makes things more fun, belts out the problems, and then you can have great make-up-sex! haha, they always love it and agree 100%! Infact, sometimes when there is nothing to argue about, I will find something stupid just for a bit of fun! haha, they get angry at the time, but still love it afterwards! Also I honestly beleive that arguements bring two people closer together, once you go through a lot of sh*t together (plus of course have a lot of good times along the way), you seem to be very very close from my experience and the girl then does not want to run away as she has invested so much time, effort and emotion into the relationship! Just a quick thought from my perspective anyways!

 

[frivolousz21]

so hellboy how did it go?

today is the USA's biggest holiday..so last night me and my gal got together before we went downtown to watch the fireworks over the river front....

she came over and we took a nap..it was a great time.

then on the way there i got a FAT buzz on..while she drove..and then started talking all crazy..and she was like wow..I want to cry im so happy listening to you.


and after the fireworks we went back and spent the night together.

so tonight I have to go to this barbeque thing with her so I can meet some of her friends and family members.

this is all crazy.

but this is the most amazing women ive ever met.


good to see im not the only one on this board who can be a DJ and still have a heart.

 

[ARK]

Sweet Friv!

I had a good time with my woman over the weekend as well. I posted a good update!

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=77895