if sosuave was the police, this guy would be shot, funny as hell

[Lt dan]

ok the chick is ugly. just so you know. id give her a four nice girl but ugly. haha this is great. im gonna use something like this to pick up a girl



I'm writing you again. I guess I can consider myself very lucky, I've fallen for the most atractive girl in the world. Yesterday I had to stop and think about what she really meant to me. Was she just a spur of the moment fling? Is she a waste of time? Is she really worth helping? The answers to all these questions were so simply asked and even more simpler to answer. She is more than a spur of the moment fling because I want her for every moment I'm alive and every breath I take has her thought in it. She would never be a waste of time becaue she herself seems to stop time when she is around me and she drones out ll other thoghts of pain and misery while I'm around her. When she comes arond I forget all about the past I used to live and all about the life style I used to live. To me helping her is what I truly want to do because no one has ever accepted me for what I am or tried ot help me with what I am no one but her. I will help her in any way possible because she showed a dead man a little spirit ot rekindle the flame of life and love. As I talked to her on the phone she asked me what I would do to prove my love to her. I would crawl down a path of thorns or climd a thousand foot wall or trek to the most barren lifeless place on earth I would climb right up to the sky just to capture the stars and I would live in exile ot keep her from seeing my wretched face. I soon started to ask myself questions. Why am I so deserving of her? What does she see in a poor boy like me? Why does she accept my problems and is willing ot help me whe no one else would or could? baby if you could please answer those questions. But I have to leave for now and I will be back soon!!


this was on one of those online diary things so yes, she read it.

 

[Smooth as Anything]

That, is what I consider a lost cause.

 

[Quad4IV]

LMAO!!!

lol yeah but i can remember a time when i was that guy. (well maybe not that bad.

 

[SnatchJP]

Heh... well, he knows what he wants.... at least he seems to think he does...

Hey, it's *romantic*, right? Who knows, if this girl is a 4, he might get some anyway due to lack of competition. You never know...

 

[icepick]

Infatuation?

Wow. This guy really has caught it. Infatuation. Bad! PEA and all those other chemicals can really do a number on someone. But you know, he is denying the true nature of what he is feeling...

Lust.

Plain, old fashioned, I-wanna-screw-till-our-crotches-get-so-dry-they-catch-fire, lust.

Anyone who has been with many women knows this. Wonder why the 'cure' for oneitis is to sleep with ten other women? Almost any woman can trigger this reaction in a guy.

And deep down, women know this. That is why this stuff will repel any decent, sane, non-desperate woman.

I remember that I used to be in denial when I had oneitis, I tried to call it 'love'. I thought I was 'above' lust.

No one is above lust, the real "test" is if you are honest with yourself about it.

And if you are honest with yourself, you will multiply your success many times over.

 

[whatsupwiddat]

Jester, load the rifle.

 

[NYC Dude]

I don't know if rifle is the appropriate word. "Cannon" is more like it

 

[aerodynamyk]

that is sad

that is the saddest, and yet funniest thing i have heard in the last 6 months.

 

[The Antichrist_Star]

*Shakes head*

How to lose a girl in... ten minutes.

 

[Lt dan]

she says, "well if you knew anything about his past you would understand" hmmmmm afc=average frustrated chick

 

[jmm854]

That's some funny sh*t right there, Dan.

 

[jmm854]

By the way...if that letter works on the girl, whether she's hot or not...remind me to quit DJ'ing.

 

[Lt dan]

well it doesnt really work, i think she just puts up with it. i asked her about it today. she said what about it. i said, dont you think its kinda loserish, she said, in a kinda whisper, yeah, then her voice came up again and said but if you knew about his past then you would understand. shes making exceses for being desperate if you ask me.