if i stood up a flaky girl, or think i did is that bad?

pete101

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there was a flaky woman who never committed to a time to meeting so i applied the 2 strikes rule with her.. 3 even and left it.

then she contacts me 2 weeks after out of the blue, but i made no mention of meeting up and made her suggest we meet up.

her final text to me was 'Great! where we going? what time we meeting? where should we meet exactly?'

i was being bold not putting any question marks in my texts to her but it might have been a mistake: the response i gave to her was

'that secret bar i told u about in x place. meet me at y place at 9.30pm on Saturday and i will drive us there. wear heels for me. ;)'

no response from her (This was on the thursday prior to the Sat) up to 9.30pm on Sat no response, i was given good advice by a sosuave member to actually show up and see if she shows but i was reluctant to cos i didnt wanna looked like i was stood up, plus i felt she should have confirmed at least with a 'ok' or something.

anyway the day after Sat i texted her 'hey im so sorry about yesterday, something came up and forgot we were meeting'

no response from her. i still dont know if she showed up that night cos i didnt show.

2 weeks later, fast forward to today, it was my birthday yesterday so i texted her:

'it was my birthday yesterday, you didn't give me a birthday kiss :p we should meet up at that park again, which day is your afternoon free?'

she sends me: Omg! Congratulations! Big hug & Big kiss for u!! I really would like to see u again, but u are a very busy man... How can we celebrate ur Bday? Dinner tomorrow?

my 1st reaction is WTF, you ignore my text from last time and try to play it round that im busy. secondly she's hinting at me taking her for dinner.. shes controlling the situation pretty much. (she has never committed to a time it's been like 2 months since we first met)

i feel at this point i should just agree to do whatever she says to minimize flaking.. i.e. take her for dinner, dont squabble about wanting to go for drinks etc. in theory she should pay cos its my birthday but i'll be prepared.

i sent: yeah, meet me at x place at 7.30pm tomorrow, ok?

an hour later she sends me this:

sure, if s/t is going to change, call me or let me know before, ok? by the way, where exactly?

does this text above indicate she maybe DID show up 2 weeks ago that Sat and i stood her up?

i'll obviously find out tomorrow cos she should be pretty p1ssed about it.
 

Solomon

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Your first mistake is making plans over text, unless you have seen this women already then this is a grave mistake. Pick up the damn phone man and call! Even If a women and I make plans to hang out (like I did today) I still will call her or have her call me. Fucc that whole lame "oh I didn't get your text excuse"
 

pete101

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Solomon said:
Your first mistake is making plans over text, unless you have seen this women already then this is a grave mistake. Pick up the damn phone man and call! Even If a women and I make plans to hang out (like I did today) I still will call her or have her call me. Fucc that whole lame "oh I didn't get your text excuse"
you're preaching to the wrong guy solomon :) i'm a true advocate for calling not texting HOWEVER for the past 6 months, every time i call a girl, she never picks up.. never.. sometimes i'll get a text the next day to say sorry blah blah how r u etc, meaning she wants to correspond via text.

but it means i'm waiting for them to get back to me which is a pain esp if im tryna arrange a date for before the weekend (i generally believe girls will flake more if it's a fri/sat night date unless she's got super high IL and emotional investment in you and that would be a 2nd or 3rd date, not a 1st)

this girl is no different.. going back to the original 2 strikes i gave her.. i called her twice and ended up having to text her cos 1)she wont call me back (it's expensive) 2)she prefers to text.

either way, i dont know if she did show up, her last text seems to indicate maybe she did.. if she got all dressed up and i wasn't there she maybe didn't want to text me to ask where i was that night for embarassment.

still.. she should have texted me 'ok'. maybe she did, and i didnt' receive it, who knows.. i wont bring it up.
 

joverby

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If a chick doesn't pick up or call you back that's not a sign of high interest anyway. And for her not responding at all you sure did send a lot of texts back. I think you're really kidding yourself if you think she showed up too.
 

Never try to read a woman's mind. It is a scary place. Ignore her confusing signals and mixed messages. Assume she is interested in you and act accordingly.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

gaspipe

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joverby said:
If a chick doesn't pick up or call you back that's not a sign of high interest anyway. And for her not responding at all you sure did send a lot of texts back. I think you're really kidding yourself if you think she showed up too.
Agreed. Low interest. Shes just trolling for attention. Once you give it to her shell be back to her flakey ways. Next her and move on.
 

pete101

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joverby said:
If a chick doesn't pick up or call you back that's not a sign of high interest anyway. And for her not responding at all you sure did send a lot of texts back. I think you're really kidding yourself if you think she showed up too.
she did respond.. its just she responded like 2-3 days afterwards saying she was abroad or not in the country, some BS but no counter offer.

her texting me out of the blue was a surprise.

either way it's on tomorrow so we'll see what happens.
 

BlackMack177

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pete101 said:
you're preaching to the wrong guy solomon :) i'm a true advocate for calling not texting HOWEVER for the past 6 months, every time i call a girl, she never picks up.. never.. sometimes i'll get a text the next day to say sorry blah blah how r u etc, meaning she wants to correspond via text.

but it means i'm waiting for them to get back to me which is a pain esp if im tryna arrange a date for before the weekend (i generally believe girls will flake more if it's a fri/sat night date unless she's got super high IL and emotional investment in you and that would be a 2nd or 3rd date, not a 1st)

this girl is no different.. going back to the original 2 strikes i gave her.. i called her twice and ended up having to text her cos 1)she wont call me back (it's expensive) 2)she prefers to text.

either way, i dont know if she did show up, her last text seems to indicate maybe she did.. if she got all dressed up and i wasn't there she maybe didn't want to text me to ask where i was that night for embarassment.

still.. she should have texted me 'ok'. maybe she did, and i didnt' receive it, who knows.. i wont bring it up.
This girl is a lost cause. I'm surprised it's taken you this long to realize it, but with the way she's acting it doesn't seem like she's down for anything but your attention. All she's been doing is making fake plans and going ghost on you and you think she likes you?? This girl doesn't even think enough of you to pick up the damn phone. Does it seem right that out of nowhere she would make a 180 and suddenly be all over you?? not gonna happen. Listen to her actions because they are singing verses right now.

You are just her ego booster. All this texting out of the blue is just when she's bored and has nothing to do or no other guy giving her attention.
 

Dust 2 Dust

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If you follow through with this either 1 of 2 situations will happen.

1. You're getting flaked on again.

2. You're getting used for a free dinner and some other guy will be getting laid for your efforts.
 

Borknagar

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Yeah I'd just delete her number. I've deleted probably 100 the last year or so. Which is why I rarely ask for advice on one girl on here. Unless the girl is a LTR, or something like that I don't feel the need to stress over 1 *****. *****es in general, yes, but not one in particular. If you meet a good women, you'll truly never have to be on here asking for advice. Be cause a good women, isn't the type the majority of this board talks about as far as the female mentality goes.
 

Borknagar

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Yeah, and if you do end up ****ing her (at your convenience only of course) thern do it, but she won't be worth much after that. But I could say the same about any women though.
 

Solomon

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response in bold
pete101 said:
you're preaching to the wrong guy solomon :) i'm a true advocate for calling not texting HOWEVER for the past 6 months, every time i call a girl, she never picks up.. never.. sometimes i'll get a text the next day to say sorry blah blah how r u etc, meaning she wants to correspond via text.
If girls aren't calling you back, then it's a HUGE redflag for low interest
but it means i'm waiting for them to get back to me which is a pain esp if im tryna arrange a date for before the weekend (i generally believe girls will flake more if it's a fri/sat night date unless she's got super high IL and emotional investment in you and that would be a 2nd or 3rd date, not a 1st)

this girl is no different.. going back to the original 2 strikes i gave her.. i called her twice and ended up having to text her cos 1)she wont call me back (it's expensive) 2)she prefers to text.
Now your making excuses for her low interest trying to jusifty it, if a girl is interested she will find a way to call you, ever heard of phone cards?
either way, i dont know if she did show up, her last text seems to indicate maybe she did.. if she got all dressed up and i wasn't there she maybe didn't want to text me to ask where i was that night for embarassment.
MORE EXCUSES
still.. she should have texted me 'ok'. maybe she did, and i didnt' receive it, who knows.. i wont bring it up.
Mate look this chick isn't interested its plain as day, if a chick isn't even picking up my calls I don't bother. I have been down that route were a chick wouldn't pick up my calls, through "tight text game" :rolleyes: I still got the date, but it ended up badly due to the fact that there was no rapport what so ever established and her interest was already low.

If a chick is interested she will call you
 

Warrior74

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That was painful to read. Why are you still Fing with this dingy broad. Move on son.
 
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