I want to do "No Contact" but she works with me

[Svendiggity]

We flirted at work whenever we talked and her interest level was high, but she had a boyfriend. One Friday at work she tells me she broke up with her boyfriend and seemed happy about it. I said "lets hang out tomorrow" she smiled and said "okay". I text her the next day afternoon and said lets hang out. She said okay I'll bring over some movies later. I text back and said "You're inviting yourself over?" she said "yes"

I escalated things quickly with eye contact and touching. I went in for a kiss shortly there after and she rejected me. I went in for another kiss a little bit later and she kissed back but no makeout. Third time she rejected again.

Not going to get into details but it was obvious that she's a Virgin. I figured okay, she wants to take things slow. Similar situation happened the second time we hung out. Only this time I asked her what the deal was and she said she just wanted to be friends.

And honestly, I'm fine with it. I did everything the way I wanted to do it. Now my only problem is that I work with her. There is no way I can avoid her or do "No contact" We work together at Fed-Ex and load trailers together. I'm a really hard worker and a very good athlete so they need me to load alot of boxes. I've tried loading with a dozen guys there and believe it or not, she's faster that all of them and works her ass off. I don't think I can or should load with someone else because it would hurt productivity. I've never been put in this situation. Usually I can just tell a girl I can't do the friends thing and move on from there but this situation is difficult. Any advice?

 

[El Suave]

Welcome to the forum.
So just be co-workers with her. Act like it never even happened and next time she wants to hang out politely decline. She'll get the point. Are you trying to use NC to get her to change her mind and give it up?

 

[Trump]

As above. Keep everything professional, don't talk about your emotion or feelings or other girls you are dating. And don't be with her outside of work.

 

[Svendiggity]

Okay, so, if she asks to hang out I get that I'm supposed to say no but what if she acts upset that I'm giving her less attention? I suspect she will.

 

[El Suave]

You tell her you're busy and if she keeps pressing the issue you tell her that you know from your past experience that being just friends doesn't work for you. Geez, stop giving a f^ck what a chick that rejected you thinks. She was a fool, you have higher value than to end up in some chicks friend zone.
If it were me, I would tease her at work, have fun, crack jokes, make her see what a great guy she could've had, but never giver the time of day outside of work. C'mon man, act cool, confident, show that rejection didn't bother you but she's not gonna have a friendship with you on her terms. After that, sit back and watch this little girl chase you.

 

[Svendiggity]

You tell her you're busy and if she keeps pressing the issue you tell her that you know from your past experience that being just friends doesn't work for you. Geez, stop giving a f^ck what a chick that rejected you thinks. She was a fool, you have higher value than to end up in some chicks friend zone.
If it were me, I would tease her at work, have fun, crack jokes, make her see what a great guy she could've had, but never giver the time of day outside of work. C'mon man, act cool, confident, show that rejection didn't bother you but she's not gonna have a friendship with you on her terms. After that, sit back and watch this little girl chase you.

thanks

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Svendiggety,
Just goes to illustrate the opinion often expressed here that relationships with Co-Workers in the Modern World is fraught with danger!

 

[Trump]

Okay, so, if she asks to hang out I get that I'm supposed to say no but what if she acts upset that I'm giving her less attention? I suspect she will.

So she doesn't have to give you sex but you have to give her attention? That deal sucks. If she wants to hang out with you, you expect sex in return. Otherwise you are her girlfriend and emotional tampon.

 

[Greasy Pig]

El Suave nailed it.

 

[PlayHer Man]

In the future DON'T ever ask a woman "what the deal is" or other relationship status questions. Trust me on this.

Its the man's job to worry about sex and the woman's job to worry about the relationship. When men worry about the relationship.. they become beta fags. Its like a woman asking a man "When are we gonna have sex?" :crackup: :crackup:

I honestly believe you could of f*cked her if you just ignored her weirdo behavior and started spinning more plates. This has happened to me.

The minute you asked her about the relationship status and applied emotional pressure was the minute you went beta. Why? --> It showed you were not leading the relationship. It showed she was in control.

Never ask women questions about where you stand with them. Its weak, its beta and it makes their legs close.

 

[Svendiggity]

Yeah, I'm new to this stuff that's why I joined the forum. I know I should have acted like it didn't bother me when she rejected my kiss, but I did and I'm aware her interest level changed. It's obvious. I'm ready to learn from it and move on. I don't want to pursue her or try to change her mind or anything like that, I just don't want to have to see her every day, but I'll be a man and deal with it. Not a huge deal, I'd just rather not be around a girl I fvcked up with.

But I'll be posting more on here because you guys give good advice. I've been Beta my whole life but recently I've been focused on changing. I started with myself by doing the things I love; playing basketball, reading, drawing, painting etc. I started working out and eating healthy. I'm getting more confident, and I'm very happy with most aspects of my life, I just need more experience with woman. One thing I'm happy about is that I'm focused on learning from this. The old me wouldn't have looked at it that way and would have been focused on the girl rather than himself.

 

[Maximus Rex]

Rex Told You So

Now my only problem is that I work with her. There is no way I can avoid her or do "No contact" We work together at Fed-Ex and load trailers together. I'm a really hard worker and a very good athlete so they need me to load alot of boxes. I've tried loading with a dozen guys there and believe it or not, she's faster that all of them and works her ass off. I don't think I can or should load with someone else because it would hurt productivity. I've never been put in this situation. Usually I can just tell a girl I can't do the friends thing and move on from there but this situation is difficult. Any advice?

And this is why Rex is forever telling y'all muthaf*ckas not to f*ck with your co-workers. Sh*t like this happens.

 

[DarkDetective50]

We flirted at work whenever we talked and her interest level was high, but she had a boyfriend. One Friday at work she tells me she broke up with her boyfriend and seemed happy about it. I said "lets hang out tomorrow" she smiled and said "okay". I text her the next day afternoon and said lets hang out. She said okay I'll bring over some movies later. I text back and said "You're inviting yourself over?" she said "yes"

I escalated things quickly with eye contact and touching. I went in for a kiss shortly there after and she rejected me. I went in for another kiss a little bit later and she kissed back but no makeout. Third time she rejected again.

Not going to get into details but it was obvious that she's a Virgin. I figured okay, she wants to take things slow. Similar situation happened the second time we hung out. Only this time I asked her what the deal was and she said she just wanted to be friends.

And honestly, I'm fine with it. I did everything the way I wanted to do it. Now my only problem is that I work with her. There is no way I can avoid her or do "No contact" We work together at Fed-Ex and load trailers together. I'm a really hard worker and a very good athlete so they need me to load alot of boxes. I've tried loading with a dozen guys there and believe it or not, she's faster that all of them and works her ass off. I don't think I can or should load with someone else because it would hurt productivity. I've never been put in this situation. Usually I can just tell a girl I can't do the friends thing and move on from there but this situation is difficult. Any advice?

As much as possible, try to avoid dating in the workplace. It only leads to awkward situations whenever it doesn't work out and like you said, hurts productivity. I had two managers once who dated and went through a nasty breakup. At work, they would refuse to talk to each other and in turn, it affected the rest of us because they wouldn't communicate about how things should be set up or organized.

 

[VladPatton]

You tell her you're busy and if she keeps pressing the issue you tell her that you know from your past experience that being just friends doesn't work for you. Geez, stop giving a f^ck what a chick that rejected you thinks. She was a fool, you have higher value than to end up in some chicks friend zone.
If it were me, I would tease her at work, have fun, crack jokes, make her see what a great guy she could've had, but never giver the time of day outside of work. C'mon man, act cool, confident, show that rejection didn't bother you but she's not gonna have a friendship with you on her terms. After that, sit back and watch this little girl chase you.

^^^^^I agree 100%

 

[sylvester the cat]

And this is why Rex is forever telling y'all muthaf*ckas not to f*ck with your co-workers. Sh*t like this happens.

Why do you keep typing like you're Snoop Dog or something? You've already told us you're an intellectual nerdy type. Just saying.

 

[Maximus Rex]

Men Don't Worry About Other Men

Why do you keep typing like you're Snoop Dog or something? You've already told us you're an intellectual nerdy type. Just saying.

Why do you care?

 

[sylvester the cat]

Why do you care?

It's kind of annoying.

And men do worry about other men. That is what this whole website is for.

 

[Maximus Rex]

That's a Personal Problem

It's kind of annoying.

If that's the case then Rex should immediately be put on your "ignore list." For you not to do so is proof positive you're nothing more than an attention wh#ring troll."

 

[sylvester the cat]

If that's the case then Rex should immediately be put on your "ignore list." For you not to do so is proof positive you're nothing more than an attention wh#ring troll."

Not necessarily. I might have Asperger's.

 

[Yewki]

It's kind of annoying.

The constant third person referencing is kind of silly, I agree.