"I want someone who can't risk losing me"

[wjh]

Wow. So my LTR text me this morning letting me know her girlfriend broke up with her LTR (who she met on match.com).

Here's the story, and it's a terrible anecdote for any DJ to read. It's not the worst that can happen to you, but it's an AFC wreck.

So today the couple broke up. The guy, Bob, got mad at his GF and in his anger dumped her. Well he waivered after their breakup and tried to take it back. But, the girl, Suzie, said exactly what's in my title: She realized she wants someone who can't risk losing her. If that's not a desire for a total beta herb/AFC, I don't know what is.

And let me tell you about Bob. He IS a total beta. I once invited him over (and Suzie) to my condo on the beach to hang out, drink, and bbq. Well I was being a charming, fun guy and got pretty messed up after some drinks and steaks. I wasn't completely messed up, but I was having a good time. Well she would make comments like "you let him act like that?" to my GF, and she would look at her perplexed and just say that's how guys and they're just having fun. This girl Suzie, the dumper, is a total control freak. She doesn't "let" her boyfriend cut loose and have fun to any normal extent. They're broken up before over this type of thing, and during that weekend visit I learned that Bob's exgf was actually even MORE controlling than Suzie. Dude is the prototypical beta wimp that only dates controlling women.

It's pretty pathetic. Just thought I'd share.

I forgot to mention, she's also the type where she had her wedding date picked out, and was telling Bob when he was going to propose, by what time, etc.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Dude is the prototypical beta wimp that only dates controlling women.


I wonder if they all remind him of Mommy.

 

[mrRuckus]

What the hell can you do? Everyone chooses if he has self respect or not. I've given up caring; I'm not everyone's babysitter.

 

[wjh]

What the hell can you do? Everyone chooses if he has self respect or not. I've given up caring; I'm not everyone's babysitter.

I know, I certainly don't feel the urge to show him the light.

I don't care personally but I do find the broader issue, the audacity, quite interesting.

I used to think beta wimps were fairly rare. I would guess that it's maybe 80% betas to 20% alphas/DJs/naturals? What do you guys think?

I don't deal with too many girls outside of either sleeping with them or working with them, so I don't get into the orbiter/beta details in "friendly" conversations. I think my perspective is a little skewed because it seems like there are more betas/AFCs than ever.

 

[mrRuckus]

If i try in the slightest to have an opinion differing from "women are holy and great" i am met with venom and arguments against everywhere I go. I don't even put women down. I simply just state things like you shouldn't live with a girlfriend and say why and everyone yells that i'm an idiot, meanwhile i'm the one with the stress free life.

I just keep my mouth shut now and go about happy while their women maintain possession of their testicles. No skin off my back.

It shouldn't take any "education" to know not to let anyone take advantage of you.

Sex isn't even that important. It's a temporary urge i can fulfill in 5 minutes and usually more skillfully than most women. I dont' see why it's so important that it would guide life actions so drastically. And i do have a decent sex drive; I'm just a master of myself, but i suppose most people in general are weak as hell since so many are fat and whatever else. Why should controlling their sex drive be any different than controlling their lust for donuts and hatred of hard work?

People are weak. Just point and laugh and go about being the opposite.

 

[Phenomenal One]

thought this thread was in the don juan discussion forum

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

The primary tools of the BPD woman.

Law 11: Learn to Keep People Dependent on You

To maintain your independence you must always be needed and wanted. The more you are relied on, the more freedom you have. Make people depend on you for their happiness and prosperity and you have nothing to fear. Never teach them enough so that they can do without you.

Law 17: Keep Others in Suspended Terror: Cultivate an Air of Unpredictability

Humans are creatures of habit with an insatiable need to see familiarity in other people's actions. Your predictability gives them a sense of control. Turn the tables: Be deliberately unpredictable. Behavior that seems to have no consistency or purpose will keep them off-balance, and they will wear themselves out trying to explain your moves. Taken to an extreme, this strategy can intimidate and terrorize.

 

[Da Realist]

Her: I want someone who can't risk losing me.
Me: Do something useful.

 

[jophil28]

If i try in the slightest to have an opinion differing from "women are holy and great" i am met with venom and arguments against everywhere I go. I don't even put women down. I simply just state things like you shouldn't live with a girlfriend and say why and everyone yells that i'm an idiot, meanwhile i'm the one with the stress free life.

I just keep my mouth shut now and go about happy while their women maintain possession of their testicles. No skin off my back.

It shouldn't take any "education" to know not to let anyone take advantage of you.

Sex isn't even that important. It's a temporary urge i can fulfill in 5 minutes and usually more skillfully than most women. I dont' see why it's so important that it would guide life actions so drastically. And i do have a decent sex drive; I'm just a master of myself, but i suppose most people in general are weak as hell since so many are fat and whatever else. Why should controlling their sex drive be any different than controlling their lust for donuts and hatred of hard work?

People are weak. Just point and laugh and go about being the opposite.

This^^

I have two male acquaintances who have been cheated on by their wives...."I gave her everything .." and so on. When I first started listening to their whining I (mistakenly) believed that they would be open to hearing how they set the scene for her to cheat. I also believed that they wanted to change to make sure that this did not ever happen to them again. I was wrong.
Both of them just complain about "ungrateful woman" .They also fiercely justify their appallingly weak leadership, " I am a NICE guy." and ," I don't understand women"...
I pointed out to both that woman screw men over when those men act like servants or weak obedient children.

Neither of those guys are even willing to hear one word which challenges their beliefs.

 

[Zunder]

Try 99% to 1%

I agree.

I have to be honest and say I am not in the 1% fully yet.
Working on it. Training wheels in full motion.

 

[zekko]

I used to think beta wimps were fairly rare. I would guess that it's maybe 80% betas to 20% alphas/DJs/naturals? What do you guys think?

I think the truth is that on this forum everyone lumps all men into categories of either AFC or DJs. When in reality I think there are a whole lot of guys who aren't really either one, but just somewhere in between. There are a lot of guys who have self respect and aren't going to stand by and get walked on, but they may not necessarily have a great deal of game either.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

"I want someone who can't risk losing me."

"So, essentially Mr. Right would be your indentured servant?"