I want a girl in my lunch... help DJs!

[European]

First off, I am senior. And I think she is a junior.

She sits at the other side of the lunchroom with a few of her not very appealing friends, but the room isn't that big anyway. My friend (a guy) always pushes me to go and sit down over there and talk. But to me that seems like "whoa its too obvious this guy wants me." And the worst thing I want is to try to get a girl that is not physically attracted to me because if that doesn't exist then my efforts are wasted. I did read tips on DJ site and things I can think of now to do is

1) Try to fake that I am interested in her friend and then eventually turn myself over to the one I really want so she can say to herself "yes, I am better than her friend"

or

2) Use the pickup line: "My friend told me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the prettiest girl in the lunch, so could you help me out a bit?"

What do you guys think I should do?

 

[blienk]

The second line isn't bad. I think it's better to approach the girl you want to pick up, because if you go for her friend there's always a chance she won't get jealous. Not to mention, you can't always count on the girl you want having a friend nearby.

 

[InsidiousNstinct]

And the worst thing I want is to try to get a girl that is not physically attracted to me because if that doesn't exist then my efforts are wasted.

PLEASE READ THE BIBLE......

Only way this could happen is if the girl is completely shallow.

 

[mikel]

"whoa its too obvious this guy wants me."

What else is she suppose to think? If you want her, thats what you want her to think. There isn't any hiding it, but there isn't any need to hide it.

Just go up to her and start talking, Say Hi. Ask her if the seats taken and if you can sit by her. Then start talking, bring your friend along too if you want.

 

[JSH]

First of all forget everything that you have ever learned about girls aprt from through experience (even though thats mainly useless as well), then read the thread at the top aimed at newbies (that means anyone who is new/basic). Then read the Bible. Preferably in that order. Firstly I am not trying to be harsh, its just all the questions asked are very similar, your defeatist attitude will not help either. . Just relax and if you want to her, do what your friend says and go and speak too her, but make it obvious that you are interested in her sexually/physically/romantically - however, you want to express it. Do not fall into the trap of thinking we can just be friends first.

 

[European]

Thanks guys, you are a great help!! I will attempt your suggestions. After all, the answer is always no until you ask.

 

[CyranoDeBergerac]

Laughing my arse @$$ off....

When I saw the title of your post I thought you were trying to get a girl to peform fellatio!

Good stuff.

Anyway, I have two words for you my friend: Plausible Deniability. Why are you sitting by her striking up conversation? There's a veritable myriad of justifcations you can use depending on her recptiveness. She looked bored and you wanted to brighten her day. Your friend and you had a bet going about what color her eyes were. She intrigued you and you wanted to meet her. The sheer number of possibilities boggles the mind. If you're worried about coming on too strong (other than being absolutely wrong) you can always keep it low-key C+F.

Oh yeah, and if she's not attracted to you, you won't getter. Your point is moot.

Now get out there and KILL THAT DESPERATION

-CyranoDeBergerac

 

[Microphone Fiend]

I know the feeling, wher you don't want to make a move in front of everyone because you might look obvious, but it shows confidence and uniqueness on your behalf which is very good. I don't like the first idea, and the second idea sounds like a neg hit with the ending missing. I would reccomend saying something like "Hi" or playing off like you know her from somewhere "Hey don't I know you from..."

Here's an idea: The friend that's pushing you to go over there, tell him to come with you as you start talking to the girl. So if things start to go sour, you can talk to him instead of twiddling your thumbs, and he can talk to her friends so they don't get in the way.

 

[adam22]

lol im in th same situation. there is a really hot soph and im a senior who sits near me at lunch. u guys think i should try to talk to her while shes alone, do the line about mny friend saying hed bet me for a convo, or just go up to her and ask what her name is? cause do girls like it if ud say something like " hey ur pretty hot whats ur name?"

 

[Microphone Fiend]

lol im in th same situation. there is a really hot soph and im a senior who sits near me at lunch. u guys think i should try to talk to her while shes alone, do the line about my friend saying he'd bet me for a convo, or just go up to her and ask what her name is? cause do girls like it if ud say something like " hey ur pretty hot whats ur name?"

Hmm I think you should talk to girls when they're isolated because that is the main goal when it comes to dropping your "game". But for most people they don't often isolate themselves with you regularly so you have no choice but to go up and approach. If you decide to take the compliment route, then say something that is profound or something that you noticed but some stranger walking on the street would have noticed. When describing the compliment, try and be a little mysterious as it doesn't tell her exactly what you like so she fills in the blanks with what she would've wanted you to say:
Instead of saying "I like your eyes. They are nice"
say "Hmm.. there's something unique about your eyes, I can't quite say what it is but they're beautiful"

The beautiful part at the end was pushing it a little in terms of complimenting, but because you called her unique and couldn't quite explain what you liked about her eyes, it makes her seem unqiue to you, and the line seems more personal.

The betting a friend thing is okay i guess. It shows that you are doing it off a bet, and it shows bros before hos, but on the other hand, it looks like you are only approaching because your friend dared you ro, not because you like her.

 

[adam22]

fiend no offense but just going up to a girl and saying her eyes are nice is pretty lame. would it be better if i just said hey i noticed u and think ur hot? and then asked for her name

 

[LikRetsam]

Originally posted by adam22
fiend no offense but just going up to a girl and saying her eyes are nice is pretty lame. would it be better if i just said hey i noticed u and think ur hot? and then asked for her name

No. That's ghey. Giving a girl a complement of that order is counter productive as an opener.

Use the pickup line: "My friend told me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the prettiest girl in the lunch, so could you help me out a bit?"

Finish off by saying, she's right over there and pointing to an area full of girls or full of guys lol.

 

[adam22]

lolthats a good line im gonna try that one out

 

[European]

Very interesting.

I have stumbled upon page 37 of the Dj boot camp. It says:

"Approach only when you get the initial eye contact. If you walk up to her without you noticing first, you're setting yourself up for the Big R."

So, do I really need for her to look at me? because if I pass by she will probably not look.

Btw:

She is also in my gym class and she plays ping pong. Should I invite her to play with me? Or do I have better chances in lunch with plan A?

 

[blienk]

Yes, ask her to play ping-pong. Recreational games are a great opportunity for C+F and sometimes kino.

 

[Craig Reeves]

The most common mistake made when making an approach is to try and hide the fact that you are approaching. Look, there's not any need to do this, because she's going to believe that you are approaching her because you are interested in her anyway. And what's going to happen is that if you try and hide it, they'll only see you as some geek who can't make a move.

 

[European]

Ok I am an idiot.

I still can't do what I want to. You see, it will be easy for me to go up to a girl I don't like, hot or not, and talk but this one is unique. She has eyes that hypnotize me and I cease to think. She is Lebanese, but oh man, I am a disgrace as a DJ.. but trust me I will work on killing my fears and pains by just going up to her!! I just don't want her to not like me that is my biggest fear. I am not shy and I am confident, but sometimes I just feel a bit insecure of my looks. (I am a bit chubby, but I am working on it)

 

[European]

OK DJs. The moment of truth is now the past. Either I f.U.C.ked big time or I just screwed up.. ill tell you how...

I went up, dressed nice, shaved, etc.

Asked her "Hi, is this seat taken?"

her: Looking a bit hesitant and confused, "no."

Me: "My friend over there (pointing) bet me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the prettiest girl in the room, so could you help me out?" (my cheeks slowly start to get red, pretty embarrasing!!!)

her: (She looks embarassed as well, and only seldomly looked at me, I did eye contact very well but I was on her right and she was looking forward so it was difficult to get her attention. Right now I can conclude that she is shy as well)

me: "Oh by the way i'm X"

her: "Nice to meet you, X"

me: "Whats your name?"

her: "i'm x"

me: "X, thats a beautiful name... nice to meet you too."

i dont remember whole convo but heres the part where i phucked up:

her: "So is this for the bet?

me: nervous, not really thinking clearly "Well....yea... kind of."

I bet you guys are laughing right now. Told this to my friend, he said your supposed to say no its not for the bet. But then I counter argued : what the hell did I say that you bet me for? he says that was just to start convo.

I know, I say really dumb things when I am close to girls , especially if i am not relaxed. Her friends looked embarassed also.

The convo continued on for a few more minutes. Here is what surprised me: at one point she said:

"How bout I don't help you and you lose your bet?"

me: (surprised, and ready to leave, thinking this **** is over) I somehow convince her and she says "ok ill help you."

At the end, I asked if she wanted to play ping pong in gym tommorow and she said "Your a pro" I said "It doesnt matter we are there to have fun." She agrees. Then I left saying "Ok, x, thanks for helping me out" Ill see you tomorow.

OK, conclusion? I saw no signs of her liking me, although I could be wrong. Why? Few possibilites:

1) its against her religion (remember she is from Lebanon, but I am not sure if she is christian or muslim)

2) She doesnt like me physically.

3) She does think that I like her because of that line that i screwed up on above.

I might of made a fool out of myself and etc, but I am sure as hell RELIEVED that I approached her and made her NOTICE me instead of coming home everyday beating myself up mentally for not approaching her. If this was a failure, I consider it a stepping stone for victory in the future. We'll see what happens in gym tommorow and if she is a little friendlier towards me or totally despises me. All in all, I am happy.

 

[JSH]

No worries, you should be happy (As you are), you approached and set up a repeat meeting. Well done, congratulations and i hope it goes further. Remember what you have said you have siad, concentrate on the future/present and not on the past, except to learn from it.

 

[European]

OWwwwww crap.

My friend's girlfriend is in a class of the girl i like. She overheard a convo of her talking about me to my friends. And it wasn't good. Some things include she wanted me to leave and she wasn't interested. I saw that she was a bit uncomfortable and i was as well. arggggh.. I really dont know where i phucked up. Factors might include she has a b/f (doubt it) and she is just too inexperienced and immature. oh well life's a b!tch.

perfect song now: foreigner - i wanna know what love is