I walked away but she thinks she didn't do anything wrong.

[girlsarecrazy]

Before we sat down we were in line to buy lunch, we hugged, she grabbed my hand and was close We had a decent convo. Then she started to walk in front of me to find her seat. I felt like i was chasing her. She assumed i'll follow her steps to where she sits instead of walking beside me and talking to me. That's where i started to not show attention.

So I sat in lunch with my girl (i never usually do but i didn't have class) for a little bit until our conversation started to get a little dry as I tried not to show a lot of attention to her because i dont want to chase her.

Since the convo was dry.. she then whipped out her cell phone and started replying to this other guy's text message about some lacrosse game.

She's reading the text message in front of me and smiling and asking what does this mean pointing at the phone asking me to read it. She like scrolls up and flashes me the name of the person to like try and tease me?

I was like ugh... Then she finished texting reply. Then it was a little bit of silence.

Then our conversation:

"Well I'm gonna run."

"What?!?... you're not going to stay for the whole lunch with me?"

'Nah.. you're too busy texting your buddy"

"Are you serious?... (gives me dirty look)

"Well.. later"

She gives me a dirty look again... then says.. "Whatever, I don't care"

I walk away without a kiss or hug.

She texts me 10 minutes later, "You are being such a jerk. I didn't even do anything wrong. If thats how you want it to be. Then fine, see you at prom"
(Prom is in 2 days)

I didn't reply to the text as of yet, but should I? I know if i don't she'll call me. Fighting over text is pointless. She doesn't realized that she wasted moments of my life and disrepected me with the whole read other guys text messages to explain them to me. She thinks that's perfectly fine.

How do i turn this into showing her where she fvcked up. She needs to beg for forgiveness.

 

[Julian]

Its pretty stupid you were trying to be too cool for yourself at lunch. Why wouldnt you show her attention there? Theres a difference between not showering a girl with attention (which is a good thing) and just being a douchebag when your actually with the girl out to lunch.

Now if you were having a great convo and enjoying eachothers company and she whips out her phone and start texting, then THAT is disrespectful and i could see walking away. You gotta learn the difference son.

This is a perfect example of what Dj'ing isnt.

 

[girlsarecrazy]

Its pretty stupid you were trying to be too cool for yourself at lunch. Why wouldnt you show her attention there? Theres a difference between not showering a girl with attention (which is a good thing) and just being a douchebag when your actually with the girl out to lunch.

Now if you were having a great convo and enjoying eachothers company and she whips out her phone and start texting, then THAT is disrespectful and i could see walking away. You gotta learn the difference son.

This is a perfect example of what Dj'ing isnt.

There's more to our presence together. I didn't straight up not show any attention. Before we sat down we were in line, we hugged, she grabbed my hand and we had a decent convo. Then she started to walk in front of me to find her seat. I felt like i was chasing her. She assumed i'll follow her steps to where she sits instead of walking beside me and talking to me. That's where i started to not show attention.

She's def. craving for attention and control from me. I finally decided after the whole cell phone thing that enough is enough so i walked away.

 

[JC9]

From the way you describe it, it sounds like are way overanalyzing and blowing a regular event out of proportion.

Her walking in front to find a seat isn't controlling. Her texting a friend on her cell isn't some major offense. You weren't out on a date together, and your 'not trying to show attention' attitude left her bored.

There's **** tests or a girl trying to gain control over you, then there is everyday regular life; don't confuse the two.

 

[girlsarecrazy]

I guess i need to explain this girl a little more. She throws me around like a little rag doll especially on the phone. She'll call me and we'll get into a good converstation and then will be like hold on, switchs over to a friend on the other line, puts me on hold for 5 minutes, switches back to me, tells me that she'll call me later. Then she called me again and did the same thing again and well be like I gotta go and hang up without waiting for me to respond. And again. 3 times in one night.

Then all the time she'll control when we hang out, when enough is enough, etc. I'm almost losing complete control. I'm trying to avoid that.

 

[JC9]

I guess i need to explain this girl a little more. She throws me around like a little rag doll especially on the phone. She'll call me and we'll get into a good converstation and then will be like hold on, switchs over to a friend on the other line, puts me on hold for 5 minutes, switches back to me, tells me that she'll call me later. Then she called me again and did the same thing again and well be like I gotta go and hang up without waiting for me to respond. And again. 3 times in one night.

Then all the time she'll control when we hang out, when enough is enough, etc. I'm almost losing complete control. I'm trying to avoid that.

I definately understand the trying to not lose control or give up your power, but don't overreact to every situation.

She puts you on hold? Hang-up.
She runs over to talk to her friends when your on a date to the movies? Walk away.

It just seems like the lunch thing was a completely mudane occurance, no blatent control attempts or disrespect.

If she pulled out her cell phone to text in the middle of an active conversation? That's disrespect and should be treated as such.

Better response would be to act like she is boring you. If she isn't putting in equal effort in conversations or whatnot, let yourself become distracted. Look around the room, check your voice-mail, etc.

 

[girlsarecrazy]

The person that she was texting was a single guy that always asks her to hang out and she was showing me the text messaging and shoving it in my face.

I wouldn't have cared if it was a girl.

Our most recent text messaging conversation was this:

After i didn't reply to her after an hour she texted me again:

"What is wrong. What did I do to make you just get up and leave me?"

"Do you honestly think i have time to help you interpret text messages from other people? I have a math project to do. I'll see you friday since i'm a jerk."

"Wow you are being one! You could of said you had to go work on your project. You just got up and left."

"K, see ya friday!"

 

[kingofnewbie]

She gives me a dirty look again... then says.. "Whatever, I don't care""You are being such a jerk. I didn't even do anything wrong. If thats how you want it to be. Then fine, see you at prom"

she knows what she did wrong and you were right to walk away. Reply her instant message with something like "what the hell are u talking about?" pretend nothing happen and next time she gives you **** just walk away do the same thing until she gets the point. Don't try to say or accuse her she did something wrong because u won't be able to pin her down. she will give u excuese and deny she wasn't givng u **** but considering the way she treats u on phone she doesn't hold u that high but u might be overthinking walking behind her part.

 

[DanelMadr]

So I sat in lunch with my girl (i never usually do but i didn't have class) for a little bit until our conversation started to get a little dry as I tried not to show a lot of attention to her because i dont want to chase her.

It's not YOUR girl right? I mean if you haven't slept with her and you "don't want to chase her" then you only want her to be your girlfriend and she is not yet. So, she was either testing your reaction and you failed or she thinks You Are Just A FRIEND and you over-reacted. In other case (she is b***h) you did the right thing. Decide for yourslef. I think you over-reacted, sorry.

 

[girlsarecrazy]

Me and her status: Open Casual Relationship. We're fvcking, and basically just act like we're boyfriend and girlfriend but we don't make a big deal about titles. It's just a less serious girlfriend/boyfriend relationship. We don't see any other people.

 

[WhAcKeD!]

Personally I would have got up and walked away as well. Judging by your description of her she sounds like a control freak. If she pulled out her cell phone in the middle of a conversation that is blatant disrespect, I would have just said something like, "I have to head somewhere a little early, talk to you later." and got up and left.

 

[girlsarecrazy]

Well I don't think i'm making any progress with this little fight. I just texted her something and her reply was, "Whatever.

Ah.. I think i'm losing this fight. She hasn't apoligized. Neither have I (I'm not going to, she expects me to I bet)

Time for me to play the ignore game? It's 2 days before prom. I want us to be on good terms during Prom.

 

[mrRuckus]

"Do you honestly think i have time to help you interpret text messages from other people? I have a math project to do. I'll see you friday since i'm a jerk."

That last sentence is such a female comment. Twisting words around and throwing them in her face with no goal except to be mean.

Why couldn't you just handle what you didn't like right then and there instead of just walking away?

"Hey i think it's a bit rude to talk on the phone or text when you're having a conversation... but it's cool... you didn't know how i felt about it."

I actually believe the same thing... but that's what the new culture is. Phone calls and txts can NO LONGER WAIT (oh no!!!!!) and people don't think anything of just txting away right in front of your face. But most considerate people will stop doing it around you if you let them know how you think they come off when they do it.

Btw you're being nothing but an ass to her.

 

[girlsarecrazy]

Yea. Would it be right for me to apoligize then? I didn't want to fvck things up.

I'm a senior in High School just stressing out because of the finals and project that i have due before Prom.

 

[kingofnewbie]

dude don't apologize under any circumstances NO u do it she got u!! just say like can we forget about this?

 

[girlsarecrazy]

dude don't apologize under any circumstances NO u do it she got u!! just say like can we forget about this?

Good. I thought there were some DJ rules about apoligize. I knew i wasn't going to tell her sorry.

 

[Maximus]

What do you want?

It all comes down to what you want.

Take a gut check.

I think you already know she is not exactly being respectful. All good, healthy and satisfying relationships are built on respect. Some other posters commented that your reaction to her "regular life stuff" is over board… but then you mention the guy she texted with is single and constantly trying to “hang out” with her. She might like you, it might be a test, but regardless, she is using this other guy to create drama between you both where there does not need to be any. Your following correspondence and arguing with her is proof of that. If she loved you, she would not be arguing with you about this other guy. Girls that love you do not want to piss you off and will not talk about fun, single guys they have to be “friends” with… they just don’t do it. If this other guy was just a friend, she would be treating his messages as annoying and if she does talk with you about him, her words and body language would be about as excited as telling you she has to go the bathroom and will be right back. Somehow I think her body language showed that she really liked texting with this guy and wanted you to know it.

If you love each other, you will have dissagreements and discussions, not arguments and drama. If you are needy and insecure with one another, drama and explitives of all kinds explode!

My take on it… she is setting you up for something long term and serious if you demand it and show your spine, or, she is setting you up to be the one that “broke up” your relationship. Remember, a woman is NEVER wrong about what happens in a relationship and if she can make the breakup your fault, she will.

So again… what do you want? If you like the drama, then keep seeing her and remember, she will not change! If not, then stop. Feel the need to tell her what you think? Go ahead and don’t apologize for it. Try to be a gentleman about it but even if you are not, who cares. As long as you don’t feel the need to apologize for your actions, then whatever you do is in accordance with who you are and that is what being a Don Juan is all about, living in your own world with no apologies to anyone. You have every right to express yourself and what you think and feel and a woman that loves you will respect your opinion and want to talk with you about it, not fight and create drama.

My two cents.

 

[flippinfreak]

lol you know the deal now. DOn't ask us that question... do your damned exercises.

C+F...

Think of everything that has happened that is bothering you.

Think of 5 C+F responses and run them through that tiny head of yours.

Pick up the phone and call her house. If you HAVE to leave a message, "hey HB, this is girlsarecrazy, give me a call, I need to talk to you"

Talk to her casually for two minutes. Ask what she's going to wear to the prom. Ask her if she's so pissed off that she chose somebody else to go with yet... than causally throw in some C+F about the situation. Don't bring up how sorry and bothered you feel about the situation until you bring up the fact that she should feel bothered about it first. "I bet you think I'm such a jerk blah blah blah"

For the record though, you acted like an idiot walking off like that without finishing lunch with her.

 

[flippinfreak]

Good. I thought there were some DJ rules about apoligize. I knew i wasn't going to tell her sorry.

Rules are for chumps who don't know what general guidelines are.

Generally though, you only say sorry for something that was totally out of hand.... getting up and walking away from a conversation is stupid, but you were just exercising your social prowess which is next to nothing. She should understand if you just tell her what you were thinking.

lol, there are people who won't quit until the other person says sorry though. Make a big blown out effort to say sorry, without gifts, make it extravagant for the situation and you should get a few laughs and general understanding. What you won't get is some girl who gets all hot headed about being better than you because she managed to make you say sorry.

PS look who you responded to. KingofNewbie, does that sound in any way like a troll to you?

 

[Maximus]

What do you want?

It all comes down to what you want.

Take a gut check.

I think you already know she is not exactly being respectful. All good, healthy and satisfying relationships are built on respect. Some other posters commented that your reaction to her "regular life stuff" is over board… but then you mention the guy she texted with is single and constantly trying to “hang out” with her. She might like you, it might be a test, but regardless, she is using this other guy to create drama between you both where there does not need to be any. Your following correspondence and arguing with her is proof of that. If she loved you, she would not be arguing with you about this other guy. Girls that love you do not want to piss you off and will not talk about fun, single guys they have to be “friends” with… they just don’t do it. If this other guy was just a friend, she would be treating his messages as annoying and if she does talk with you about him, her words and body language would be about as excited as telling you she has to go the bathroom and will be right back. Somehow I think her body language showed that she really liked texting with this guy and wanted you to know it.

If you love each other, you will have dissagreements and discussions, not arguments and drama. If you are needy and insecure with one another, drama and explitives of all kinds explode!

My take on it… she is setting you up for something long term and serious if you demand it and show your spine, or, she is setting you up to be the one that “broke up” your relationship. Remember, a woman is NEVER wrong about what happens in a relationship and if she can make the breakup your fault, she will.

So again… what do you want? If you like the drama, then keep seeing her and remember, she will not change! If not, then stop. Feel the need to tell her what you think? Go ahead and don’t apologize for it. Try to be a gentleman about it but even if you are not, who cares. As long as you don’t feel the need to apologize for your actions, then whatever you do is in accordance with who you are and that is what being a Don Juan is all about, living in your own world with no apologies to anyone. You have every right to express yourself and what you think and feel and a woman that loves you will respect your opinion and want to talk with you about it, not fight and create drama.

My two cents.