I think my new landlord wants me and i want her...

[joekerr31]

I disagree. I think she was totally up for it. She was waiting for you to make a move. there are lots of women out there ready to have semi anonymous sex. there are plenty of women who treat sex a lot like men do. these women are of course the ones that will have mind blowing sex with you. And in time, they will send these unsuspecting guys to sosuave with their tails between their legs.

if he hadn't JUST moved in and if their relationship didn't have a business aspect to it, then i would agree with you.

but if she wanted to get laid, he did a good job of giving her the opportunity. she went to the floor, so he went to the floor. she could have continued to escalate it - 'owww, my stupid calf. it keeps cramping.' 'really? do you want me to massage that out for you?'

but the moment he got down, she got up and changed her tone.

i don't think she was looking to get laid but rather is a woman who gets a kick out of male attraction and knowing she is still desireable even though she is older.

who knows, in a few weeks he might be tapping it though.

 

[MacAvoy]

However you still URGENTLY need to spin some more plates . THis LandLady stuff should NOT be at the center of your emotions.. Get out with some other women and make up for lost time.

Good point. He should start chasing the other women in the house that are interested in him. Increase his social proof with the new landlady.

 

[joekerr31]

OK, so we have some mixed opinions. PE and others thinks she was up for it, and considering that this woman is a go-getter and a super-achiever, he might be right. She is strong-willed and goes after what she wants. But according to joekerr, my read of the situation was correct. Hmmm. Better to err on the side of caution during the first visit, esp with one's landlord? My main cause for restraint was precisely that - i was still a stranger and it was my very first visit with her. So she was sending out signals of eventual sexual availability? My attitude was it's my first visit. I'll play it cool, show her she's worth my time, build up some familiarity, and let her wait for my first move when it does come.

The crucial thing is knowing when to make that first move. If she was that blatant in showing her sexual interest, i can only wonder what she'll do to signal that she is ready, unless PE was right and her lying down WAS the signal...

first of all i was right and everyone else is wrong :cuss:

just joking.

but i do re-iterate. the BEST move you could have made would have been to look her over, flirt very lightly, then leave. that makes YOU the prize. it says 'ya your hot. yep, im digging you. but I know this is all pretty much about you getting attention, so i've given you a little. if you want more, you're going to have to earn it."

if you let her control the tone and pace and mood of the conversation you make her the prize and hand over all control to her. you are lefting HOPING that she's 1) attracted to you and 2) horny and wants to f*ck.

whereas if you leave early you raise her IL level in you. "wow, not a lot of guys would leave when i'm flashing my boobs in my skimpiest outfit. i know hes not gay because i saw him checking me out. i wonder why he left? i need to find out more about this guy, he's intriguing. i want him to want me, but im not sure he fully does. i don't know why, but the thought of this guy now is getting me wet."

you have to ALWAYS interact with women as though you've got 5 others waiting in your bed at home. which means you should be light, funny, playful, attentive, BUT when they start dangling a steak with no intention of letting you eat it, you gotta cut things short and let them know you can get steak other places. so if they want to dangle it, then they better feed you.

 

[joekerr31]

Could go either way, but I would guess that her body language suggested that she wasn't putting herself out there for sex.

Problem is you don't know, and the window usually closes after about the second time she "puts herself out there" for you, if that's what she was doing.

she was putting herself out there for sexual attention - not sex.

now, if she wanted sex she would have got him into the bedroom. "you're a big strong guy. could you help move a mirror. just this way...CHICKA BOW BOW CHICKA BOW BOW" (lame attempted at porn music).

anyway, heres my basic rule of thumb. when a woman is doing all the things to get you worked up but NOT giving you a fairly clear green light to make your move she is usually just working you up for her own ego gratification.

now yes, many times you can actually get her to fall into her own trap and she gets caught up in the moment and suddenly finds herself wanting to screw you. but more often than not, if she's just getting you hot and bothered and not creating an opening for you to move on, its all ego based.

women know how to make openings. they will brush you, or they will get close to you, or they will over compliment you on things that are totally out of context to the conversation at hand, etc.

my money says that if he had made a move she would have shut him down cold and said 'i appreciate that you like me, but we only JUST met."

he played it right staying cool.

 

[joekerr31]

Another Landlord-Chick? :crackup:

i gotta admit, things like banging the landlord, teacher, stewardess, etc. are cool. theres something almost porno about it.

 

[KarmaSutra]

analyzing situations like this is for WOMEN

are you a WOMAN?

Posting a response like this is for idiots.

Are you an idiot?

 

[penkitten]

dear resident,
the landlord does not want you, she wants to make nicey nice small talk to get you on her good side, so that you will take care of your unit and pay your rent on time and so that you will not make damages in the place or have the cops there every other day.
sincerely,
another landlord chick

 

[Phyzzle]

analyzing situations like this is for WOMEN

are you a WOMAN?

Are you SKIP TO MY LOU?

Are you LESS THAN 25?

 

[Latinoman]

Couple things...

1- Under NO circunstances tell any woman about your years of sexual religious taboo. It will creep them out.

2- If you are NOT going to make a move...at the very least, be the one saying "Well...I have to go. Thanks for ____". I mean, I notice you are ALWAYS getting "kicked" out. You should be the one saying, "I got to go" (unless you already making a move).

 

[KarmaSutra]

dear resident,
the landlord does not want you, she wants to make nicey nice small talk to get you on her good side, so that you will take care of your unit and pay your rent on time and so that you will not make damages in the place or have the cops there every other day.
sincerely,
another landlord chick

BINGO!

'Kitten on the money!

For you darling :flowers:

 

[Latinoman]

OK, so we have some mixed opinions. PE and others thinks she was up for it, and considering that this woman is a go-getter and a super-achiever, he might be right. She is strong-willed and goes after what she wants. But according to joekerr, my read of the situation was correct. Hmmm. Better to err on the side of caution during the first visit, esp with one's landlord? My main cause for restraint was precisely that - i was still a stranger and it was my very first visit with her. So she was sending out signals of eventual sexual availability? My attitude was it's my first visit. I'll play it cool, show her she's worth my time, build up some familiarity, and let her wait for my first move when it does come.

The crucial thing is knowing when to make that first move. If she was that blatant in showing her sexual interest, i can only wonder what she'll do to signal that she is ready, unless PE was right and her lying down WAS the signal...

The crucial thing is knowing when to EXCUSE yourself and say "Goodnight"...BEFORE she does it.

 

[penkitten]

I mean, I notice you are ALWAYS getting "kicked" out.

is this true?

 

[jophil28]

dear resident,
the landlord does not want you, she wants to make nicey nice small talk to get you on her good side, so that you will take care of your unit and pay your rent on time and so that you will not make damages in the place or have the cops there every other day.
sincerely,
another landlord chick

If this is true, then it is just another tacky manipulation by a woman to get what she wants. For f**ks sake, why don't women just ask for what they want instead of 'sexing' everything up ...They Pi$$ me off //This shyte is so high school. No wonder middle aged guys do not ever want to commit again. We have had about a gut full of this slimey crap.

 

[blueguy]

dear resident,
the landlord does not want you, she wants to make nicey nice small talk to get you on her good side, so that you will take care of your unit and pay your rent on time and so that you will not make damages in the place or have the cops there every other day.
sincerely,
another landlord chick

I'd have to agree with this assessment. Now if it was the landlord's daughter, like last time, that would be another story (unless she was in on it too )

I also agree with the guy who said worrying about situations like this is for chicks. Guys analyze things they can change. Chicks worry about things they have no control over.

Next time you don't have much info on a situation, ask yourself two questions:

1. Will I get another opportunity?
2. What do I have to lose?

 

[Latinoman]

is this true?

Yep. His last date literally told him something to the effect that she was a little tired. He was at her place too.

The landlady literally walked him out and said good night.

HE should be the one ENDING the visit. Especially if he notices that he is not going anywhere.

 

[MikeYikes122]

Analyzing the over-analyzation

GtarPlayr, I don't mean any offense here, but you remind me of me when I was about 20.

I had just entered college and I was on the verge of cracking my AFC-ness. Girls were attracted to me, and I was starting to understand some of theories I was being taught on here.

Anyway, there was a girl in my dorm who I spent two or three hours every day with. We worked out together. We went out to eat together and got coffee together, sometimes I even paid (which makes me cringe thinking about now.) We talked on the phone and AOL Instant Messenger with each other sometimes for hours. And when we'd go out to parties, I'd always walk her home.

Basically, I was her boyfriend, but I wasn't getting any.

Instead, I'd come on here and post crazy 1,200-word examinations of our interactions, breaking down everything from her words, to her dress, to her body language. Why? Because she had a long-distance boyfriend (who I knew was a loser from high school), and she told everyone that we were just friends when everyone told her she was into me. The insane thing? I actually believed her and never made a move on her or anything, even though deep down inside I figured she had a thing for me. We never kissed, never messed around, never did anything.

I was so far in the woods that I couldn't see forest.

Your situation(s) reminds me of that. This girl's actions, like my fake-girlfriend's from college, are screaming attraction. You just need our affirmation for some reason, while all the signs are there that she is into you. You seem like you even pick up on them.

If I were you, I'd call a spade a spade at this point. I'd stick to my guns and go in for the kill. It doesn't sound like it would be that hard to work the landlord up. My only objection would be that she is my landlord, and that could be weird. But if you don't care, then what is stopping you from at least just putting in a little bit of work?

I agree that she didn't want sex at that moment, but she sounds interested. It wouldn't be too hard to nail her.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Basically, I was her boyfriend, but I wasn't getting any.


I was so far in the woods that I couldn't see forest.

Too many fvcking brothers are victims of this right here.

Good for you for freeing yourself.

 

[joekerr31]

you don't have to be over 25 to realize that this guy analyzes every simple little situation WAY TOO MUCH

this is true. but its better to over analyze life, suffer as a result, but at some point come to clear and final resolutions, than it is to never analyze life at all.

a good 90% of the joy to be had in life is figure things out.

 

[Mr.Positive]

dear resident,
the landlord does not want you, she wants to make nicey nice small talk to get you on her good side, so that you will take care of your unit and pay your rent on time and so that you will not make damages in the place or have the cops there every other day.
sincerely,
another landlord chick

I'm going to disagree with this..

The way I see it, she was into him. If she only wanted to get on his good side...

1) She would not have inquired about his personal live. This shows interest in him.

2) She would not have informed him that she was trying online dating, showing she was available.

3) and lastly..she would not have left the room, and changed into a sexy top with pajamas. This showed that she was extremely comfortable with him, comfortable enough to let her guard down and let him see her when she's wearing her relaxing sleeping clothes.

I think Gtarplyr is on the right track here, and if he sees her again, he's got another shot at this. What he needs to do, is get her relaxed again, and then set the frame that he's interested in her physically.

 

[edger]

but the moment he got down, she got up and changed her tone.

i don't think she was looking to get laid but rather is a woman who gets a kick out of male attraction and knowing she is still desireable even though she is older.

Guitarist, I hold the same stance as Joekerr here.