my girlfriend is friends with this guy from work. he calls and wakes her up everymorning to make sure she is up and texts her like crazy all the time. she said he is just a friend but when she was sleep i look in her text message box and i saw him callin her baby, i miss you etc. and she reply with things like i miss you too and really baby etc. also she has been lying about where she's been going because i found out that she's been picking him up from another job everynow and then.he also said something like "i hope you find a newboyfriend at the club" when it seemed he was angry at her. i'm really hurt by this we been together almost 2 years. should i turn around and start doing my own thing or what?
I think my girlfriend is cheating on me
- Thread starter trae22
- Start date
Docs
Banned
And she isn't going to stop by nagging. Usually in this case, I tend to go to where they hang out...and accidently see them. That usually makes it simple. You caught her red-handed. Don't say anything when they see you, just stand there for a bit....and walk off. Not a word. Words at this point tend to be too harsh...or not properly used.
She'll start the talking when she comes home, or she damn well better right? Take it easy, because we all kinda get close to a couple people sometimes...
She'll start the talking when she comes home, or she damn well better right? Take it easy, because we all kinda get close to a couple people sometimes...
unless your in an area of the world where its normal for a woman to call a male friend "baby" she's cheating on you.
my personal preference in all of this is pretty simple. i wouldn't bother confronting her. or having discussions with her about it. etc.
a liar is a liar and i've learned over time that even when you confront them they will only reveal what they know they have to. even if she comes out and admits this or that, there's probably still lots more that you don't even know about.
so i would just get to walking.
if you live together arrange for another place where you can live until you get your own place. don't tell her nothing. one day take the day off work, move all yoru stuff, and when she gets back just say "im moving out. i'll cover the rent for one month, then you're on your own."
move on and never ever look back.
some on here will say im being overly harsh. that you shoudl hear her out and give her a chance.
based on what you've written that doesn't seem necessary to me. all the red flags are there.
all i can say is that confronting liars with the expectation that they will come clean almost never works. liars will lie until their absolute last breath. it's just not worth the head ache.
its tough when you've put 2 years into something only to get cheated on, but try to look at the positive - THANK GOD she did it now and not 15 years down the road.
i would also put forward that she might blind side you very soon. she's being sloppy, and that's usually intentional. she's giving you a heads up that the sh*t is about to hit the fan, this way she doesnt feel so guilty one day ripping your heart out.
go with your gut and your intuition. sounds to me like you know how this situation is going to end. do a pre-emptive strike and move on.
my personal preference in all of this is pretty simple. i wouldn't bother confronting her. or having discussions with her about it. etc.
a liar is a liar and i've learned over time that even when you confront them they will only reveal what they know they have to. even if she comes out and admits this or that, there's probably still lots more that you don't even know about.
so i would just get to walking.
if you live together arrange for another place where you can live until you get your own place. don't tell her nothing. one day take the day off work, move all yoru stuff, and when she gets back just say "im moving out. i'll cover the rent for one month, then you're on your own."
move on and never ever look back.
some on here will say im being overly harsh. that you shoudl hear her out and give her a chance.
based on what you've written that doesn't seem necessary to me. all the red flags are there.
all i can say is that confronting liars with the expectation that they will come clean almost never works. liars will lie until their absolute last breath. it's just not worth the head ache.
its tough when you've put 2 years into something only to get cheated on, but try to look at the positive - THANK GOD she did it now and not 15 years down the road.
i would also put forward that she might blind side you very soon. she's being sloppy, and that's usually intentional. she's giving you a heads up that the sh*t is about to hit the fan, this way she doesnt feel so guilty one day ripping your heart out.
go with your gut and your intuition. sounds to me like you know how this situation is going to end. do a pre-emptive strike and move on.
This is EXACTLY how I handled the last relationship I was in where the girl cheated. I didn't know for sure whether she ****ed the guy, but all the lies were enough for me to walk. I didn't cry on her shoulder or give her a long winded speech. She came home one day and found me and my stuff gone along with a note that said, "I know everything." I ran into her about 6 months later and the minute she saw me she started weeping. It was the best revenge I've ever gotten on an ex.joekerr31 said:unless your in an area of the world where its normal for a woman to call a male friend "baby" she's cheating on you.
my personal preference in all of this is pretty simple. i wouldn't bother confronting her. or having discussions with her about it. etc.
a liar is a liar and i've learned over time that even when you confront them they will only reveal what they know they have to. even if she comes out and admits this or that, there's probably still lots more that you don't even know about.
so i would just get to walking.
if you live together arrange for another place where you can live until you get your own place. don't tell her nothing. one day take the day off work, move all yoru stuff, and when she gets back just say "im moving out. i'll cover the rent for one month, then you're on your own."
move on and never ever look back.
some on here will say im being overly harsh. that you shoudl hear her out and give her a chance.
based on what you've written that doesn't seem necessary to me. all the red flags are there.
all i can say is that confronting liars with the expectation that they will come clean almost never works. liars will lie until their absolute last breath. it's just not worth the head ache.
its tough when you've put 2 years into something only to get cheated on, but try to look at the positive - THANK GOD she did it now and not 15 years down the road.
i would also put forward that she might blind side you very soon. she's being sloppy, and that's usually intentional. she's giving you a heads up that the sh*t is about to hit the fan, this way she doesnt feel so guilty one day ripping your heart out.
go with your gut and your intuition. sounds to me like you know how this situation is going to end. do a pre-emptive strike and move on.
joekerr31 said:unless your in an area of the world where its normal for a woman to call a male friend "baby" she's cheating on you.
my personal preference in all of this is pretty simple. i wouldn't bother confronting her. or having discussions with her about it. etc.
a liar is a liar and i've learned over time that even when you confront them they will only reveal what they know they have to. even if she comes out and admits this or that, there's probably still lots more that you don't even know about.
so i would just get to walking.
if you live together arrange for another place where you can live until you get your own place. don't tell her nothing. one day take the day off work, move all yoru stuff, and when she gets back just say "im moving out. i'll cover the rent for one month, then you're on your own."
move on and never ever look back.
some on here will say im being overly harsh. that you shoudl hear her out and give her a chance.
based on what you've written that doesn't seem necessary to me. all the red flags are there.
all i can say is that confronting liars with the expectation that they will come clean almost never works. liars will lie until their absolute last breath. it's just not worth the head ache.
its tough when you've put 2 years into something only to get cheated on, but try to look at the positive - THANK GOD she did it now and not 15 years down the road.
i would also put forward that she might blind side you very soon. she's being sloppy, and that's usually intentional. she's giving you a heads up that the sh*t is about to hit the fan, this way she doesnt feel so guilty one day ripping your heart out.
go with your gut and your intuition. sounds to me like you know how this situation is going to end. do a pre-emptive strike and move on.
Easier said than done, but this is what you basically have to do.
Sounds like your relationship was over a while ago anyway. It never just happens out of the blue for no apperent reason.
You are slowly being traded-up. At this point she may not have cheated but the disrespected she has shown point to the fact that she will or is inclining too.
This is how women trade-up. They test the water with one guy while being in the arms of another guy. If all seems well with the new guy she will slowly sever ties with the old one by acting out (start fights, flakes alot, bad attitude all around) in order for YOU to break up with her so she won't have too. If you don't seem to be getting it she will eventually tell you in the nicest possible way that she felt as if you two had grown apart and she has met someone new and but she still wants you to be friends. Translation: Fvck off.
This behaviour is unacceptable in my book and I would NEXT her or eventually she will Next you. From my own experiences its just a matter of time.
This is how women trade-up. They test the water with one guy while being in the arms of another guy. If all seems well with the new guy she will slowly sever ties with the old one by acting out (start fights, flakes alot, bad attitude all around) in order for YOU to break up with her so she won't have too. If you don't seem to be getting it she will eventually tell you in the nicest possible way that she felt as if you two had grown apart and she has met someone new and but she still wants you to be friends. Translation: Fvck off.
This behaviour is unacceptable in my book and I would NEXT her or eventually she will Next you. From my own experiences its just a matter of time.
also important to add is that i don't think most women are aware of what they are doing.
they dont lie awake at night thinking "ok, tomorrow im going to flirt with jake. if things continue to go well ill slowly cut ties with frank."
thats why its so easy to miss when they are doing it. because when they lie to your face they are telling the truth - at least as it exists in their own head. they are lying to themselves.
they think what they are doing is innocent enough. they aren't cheating after all, just being friendly back to a guy being friendly to them. then everything gets out of control and they dont know what to do.
the bf tends to smell an egg fart in the air and eventually asks 'what the hell is going on?". to which she says 'nothing. i dont knwo why you are being like this. your so controlling. this just isnt working.' haha.
its taken me 32 years to learn that what SHE does or doesnt do, what she thinks or doesnt think, what she feels or doesnt feel - DOESNT MATTER.
only one thing matters - AM I HAPPY. is she adding to my happiness or detracting from it. if she's detracting from it and doing so for an extended period of time (say a month or more) - then that's it, im out.
cableguy, glad to hear your story my man. this is usually want happens 90% of the time.
the other thing is that if YOU take control and end it, you'll feel a sense of self pride and empowerment over the whole situation. you'll want to improve your life without her. whereas guys who twist on the noose until she finally breaks their necks tend to go through months/years of self loathing and pity and look back and blame their life on some b*tch that wasn't worth much to start with.
and 99% of the time it is utterly pointless talking to her about the break up. she will NOT give you what you want to hear. she will NOT tell you the honest truth. the type of women who WOULD tell you the truth are the type of women who never do this kind of crap to start with.
you have to accept that you will get NOTHING from her that is of any benefit to you in the least. IF you decide to walk find closure in your action of walking, don't look to her for anything at all. Hell, 90% of the time she will find some insane irrational sense of logic where she manages to blame YOU for her cheating. hahaha.
its too bad this is happening to you man, but in the long run this is a good thing - because miss Right is still out there waiting for you. the sooner you bag this hag the better off you'll be.
they dont lie awake at night thinking "ok, tomorrow im going to flirt with jake. if things continue to go well ill slowly cut ties with frank."
thats why its so easy to miss when they are doing it. because when they lie to your face they are telling the truth - at least as it exists in their own head. they are lying to themselves.
they think what they are doing is innocent enough. they aren't cheating after all, just being friendly back to a guy being friendly to them. then everything gets out of control and they dont know what to do.
the bf tends to smell an egg fart in the air and eventually asks 'what the hell is going on?". to which she says 'nothing. i dont knwo why you are being like this. your so controlling. this just isnt working.' haha.
its taken me 32 years to learn that what SHE does or doesnt do, what she thinks or doesnt think, what she feels or doesnt feel - DOESNT MATTER.
only one thing matters - AM I HAPPY. is she adding to my happiness or detracting from it. if she's detracting from it and doing so for an extended period of time (say a month or more) - then that's it, im out.
cableguy, glad to hear your story my man. this is usually want happens 90% of the time.
the other thing is that if YOU take control and end it, you'll feel a sense of self pride and empowerment over the whole situation. you'll want to improve your life without her. whereas guys who twist on the noose until she finally breaks their necks tend to go through months/years of self loathing and pity and look back and blame their life on some b*tch that wasn't worth much to start with.
and 99% of the time it is utterly pointless talking to her about the break up. she will NOT give you what you want to hear. she will NOT tell you the honest truth. the type of women who WOULD tell you the truth are the type of women who never do this kind of crap to start with.
you have to accept that you will get NOTHING from her that is of any benefit to you in the least. IF you decide to walk find closure in your action of walking, don't look to her for anything at all. Hell, 90% of the time she will find some insane irrational sense of logic where she manages to blame YOU for her cheating. hahaha.
its too bad this is happening to you man, but in the long run this is a good thing - because miss Right is still out there waiting for you. the sooner you bag this hag the better off you'll be.
Easy for me to say, so I'll say it:
Leave her ass and never look back. If you two have common business to take care of, do that, consider it a business deal, close it, do what you gotta do, but MOVE on. Close your heart down and take care of this like a man.
It is so obvious you're not It in her book anymore. Why stick around and humiliate yourself any further.
I'll even venture to guess that she wants you to catch her.
Leave her ass and never look back. If you two have common business to take care of, do that, consider it a business deal, close it, do what you gotta do, but MOVE on. Close your heart down and take care of this like a man.
It is so obvious you're not It in her book anymore. Why stick around and humiliate yourself any further.
I'll even venture to guess that she wants you to catch her.
can I make it unanimous? What's weird is she is really making it obvious and easily discernible. I agree with the boys up front. ACT decisively and with precision. Give her nothing. Your project now is to move on in as dignified a way as you can. We are here for you man.
regards
regards
Regardless of whether or not she is physically cheating on you...she may as well be. She clearly is cheating on you emotionally with this guy.
If I were in your position I would just casually tell her that you have decided to start seeing other women because her friendship with this other guy is leaving you feeling unfulfilled in your relationship. Don't act jealous or demand she stop seeing him. Just tell her you are going to start seeing other women because she isn't fulfilling your needs anymore. If she wants your relationship to work she'll get rid of the male friend. If she refuses to get rid of the friend then move on.
If I were in your position I would just casually tell her that you have decided to start seeing other women because her friendship with this other guy is leaving you feeling unfulfilled in your relationship. Don't act jealous or demand she stop seeing him. Just tell her you are going to start seeing other women because she isn't fulfilling your needs anymore. If she wants your relationship to work she'll get rid of the male friend. If she refuses to get rid of the friend then move on.
GirlCrazy
Master Don Juan
Good advice so far.
What joekerr31 suggested is exactly what I would do.
One day she comes home from work to an empty apartment. I wouldn't even leave a note. No words, no arguments, no drama. The empty apartment speaks for itself more clearly than words could.
What joekerr31 suggested is exactly what I would do.
One day she comes home from work to an empty apartment. I wouldn't even leave a note. No words, no arguments, no drama. The empty apartment speaks for itself more clearly than words could.
Victory Unlimited
Master Don Juan
Yo Troops! Brace yourselves, this post is a little more HARDCORE than what I USUALLY write. Sorry, but it's been that kinda YEAR...
I agree with what EVERYBODY here has said, especially my man PHYZLLE. And what's more, this is what I'm finding out:
It's like ME, Doc Love, and Anti-Dump would probably say----DOC LOVE = Without 10 dates of consistently good behavior, you have NOTHING. Interest level really is a measure of "love". ANTI-DUMP = All women are guilty of lack of interest until PROVEN innocent. VICTORY UNLIMITED = And just because a bytch "gives" you some pusssy doesn't mean that she "wants" you.
Yo Trae22, what's been keeping you with this chick for 2 years? Is it the honesty, openness, and mutual emotional committment? Or is it just the steady sex supply? Why do I ask? Because if it's the sex, and she's actually been cheating on you, surely you would be able to tell by noticing the energy level of and frequency of the sex you've been having with her.
I'm interested in knowing: Has she been giving you pussssy, or fukking you? There IS a difference...
Over 10 years ago, I accepted my last pusssy gift. From then on, unless I could perceive that a babe really wanted to fukk me, then I'd make myself stop showing HER interest. Why? Because fukking me says PASSION, while "giving me pusssy" says DUTY, BOREDOM, and OBLIGATION. And I said "Fukk That."
No matter how HOT the babe is, I'm finding out that how I feel about her IMMEDIATELY after I get my nutt (if I EVEN get one, cuz there are some lazy, selfish, sexually inept women out here..) is the most important part of the sex act for ME.
Let's face it guys, anybody who has masturbated before will agree that nobody kNOWS how to please you like YOU do. So really, a steady sex supply from a woman who can "take us or leave us" should not be something that we should alow ourselves to be held hostage by.
And with that being said, no Bytch is worth putting up with her bullshyt and lack of interest just because she's supposedly "your" girl.
The stats, my experiences, and probably y'all's experiences too show that a lot of Bytches will consent to be your "girlfriend" while only being half-way interested in you. They hook up with guys alot of times just to avoid the "I-don't-have-a-man-like-my-friends-do BLUES".
I've never been a pimp, player, or even a forceful enough man during many of my past relationships, but that all changed FOR GOOD about a year ago. So this VU as DJ Makeover is quite a transformation for me.
And now I'm finally finding out (especially with all the shyt that I've been thru this year) that pussssy ain't ALL THAT. I mean yes, it's hot, hopefully it's tight, and you're lucky if it's wet, but it's still just a damn HOLE. It's STILL just a POTENTIAL space.
A Pussssy is just a vacuum of pleasure that you should never allow yourself to get emotionally sucked into until the Babe it's attached to has PROVEN that SHE'S been sucked into YOU first. lol
That's ALL it is. And if the woman you're attempting to connect with emotionally is NO LONGER trying to connect to YOU, then that Bytch should be terminated from your life with extreme prejudice! Why? Because now a potential asset has revealed itself to be a potential liability.
Life is HARD enough as it is, and the amount of turmoil that you open yourself up to by remaining in a foxhole with someone who has now become the enemy of your best interests is tantamount to becoming emotionally suicidal.
We've GOT to stay above the women we allow ourselves to get involved with. We've GOT to maintain some sort of objectivity so that we won't continue to be blindsided like this.
And hopefully, that same objectivity will give us the vantage point we need to protect our borders----from the enemies of our emotional best interests both foreign...and DOMESTIC.
March on.
I agree with what EVERYBODY here has said, especially my man PHYZLLE. And what's more, this is what I'm finding out:
It's like ME, Doc Love, and Anti-Dump would probably say----DOC LOVE = Without 10 dates of consistently good behavior, you have NOTHING. Interest level really is a measure of "love". ANTI-DUMP = All women are guilty of lack of interest until PROVEN innocent. VICTORY UNLIMITED = And just because a bytch "gives" you some pusssy doesn't mean that she "wants" you.
Yo Trae22, what's been keeping you with this chick for 2 years? Is it the honesty, openness, and mutual emotional committment? Or is it just the steady sex supply? Why do I ask? Because if it's the sex, and she's actually been cheating on you, surely you would be able to tell by noticing the energy level of and frequency of the sex you've been having with her.
I'm interested in knowing: Has she been giving you pussssy, or fukking you? There IS a difference...
Over 10 years ago, I accepted my last pusssy gift. From then on, unless I could perceive that a babe really wanted to fukk me, then I'd make myself stop showing HER interest. Why? Because fukking me says PASSION, while "giving me pusssy" says DUTY, BOREDOM, and OBLIGATION. And I said "Fukk That."
No matter how HOT the babe is, I'm finding out that how I feel about her IMMEDIATELY after I get my nutt (if I EVEN get one, cuz there are some lazy, selfish, sexually inept women out here..) is the most important part of the sex act for ME.
Let's face it guys, anybody who has masturbated before will agree that nobody kNOWS how to please you like YOU do. So really, a steady sex supply from a woman who can "take us or leave us" should not be something that we should alow ourselves to be held hostage by.
And with that being said, no Bytch is worth putting up with her bullshyt and lack of interest just because she's supposedly "your" girl.
The stats, my experiences, and probably y'all's experiences too show that a lot of Bytches will consent to be your "girlfriend" while only being half-way interested in you. They hook up with guys alot of times just to avoid the "I-don't-have-a-man-like-my-friends-do BLUES".
I've never been a pimp, player, or even a forceful enough man during many of my past relationships, but that all changed FOR GOOD about a year ago. So this VU as DJ Makeover is quite a transformation for me.
And now I'm finally finding out (especially with all the shyt that I've been thru this year) that pussssy ain't ALL THAT. I mean yes, it's hot, hopefully it's tight, and you're lucky if it's wet, but it's still just a damn HOLE. It's STILL just a POTENTIAL space.
A Pussssy is just a vacuum of pleasure that you should never allow yourself to get emotionally sucked into until the Babe it's attached to has PROVEN that SHE'S been sucked into YOU first. lol
That's ALL it is. And if the woman you're attempting to connect with emotionally is NO LONGER trying to connect to YOU, then that Bytch should be terminated from your life with extreme prejudice! Why? Because now a potential asset has revealed itself to be a potential liability.
Life is HARD enough as it is, and the amount of turmoil that you open yourself up to by remaining in a foxhole with someone who has now become the enemy of your best interests is tantamount to becoming emotionally suicidal.
We've GOT to stay above the women we allow ourselves to get involved with. We've GOT to maintain some sort of objectivity so that we won't continue to be blindsided like this.
And hopefully, that same objectivity will give us the vantage point we need to protect our borders----from the enemies of our emotional best interests both foreign...and DOMESTIC.
March on.
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One thing that I've found that women want when a relationship ends is closure. Deny a woman closure and it will eat her alive. She won't have an opportunity to:GirlCrazy said:
1. Blame you for her indiscretions
2. Confess and have a clean conscience
3. Beg you for forgiveness so she can do it again later
4. Tell you she's glad you found out so she can bail
GirlCrazy
Master Don Juan
Exactly. And it's important to point out that you're not denying her closure to get back at her or satisfy some petty feeling of revenge. You are denying her those things because you don't owe them to her. She made poor choices, and the consequences of those choices are hers to bear, not yours.Cableguy said:
Peace and Quiet
If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.
Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.
This will quickly drive all women away from you.
And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.
Brilliant post VU.
Loved the fox hole analogy.
Women today are ruthless. Because society has been telling them for the past 20-40 years that they’ve been wrong done by, they now feel as though anything they do is excusable. And you know something, society backs that up more often than not. And also, because women are sly in how they go about things (very good at making their bad behavior seem like YOUR fault), they never get called on their sh*t.
Not all women are this way, but I tell ya, a hell of a lot are. Women know they can get away with murder now a days, and they are!
The ONLY recourse you have as a man is to walk the f*ck away from a woman the moment she starts exhibiting narcissistic, irrational, untrustworthy behavior.
And it’s really sad that men are so damn hard on themselves over the childish, inane and immature behavior some women exhibit. You are making THEM the prize. Which is the ass backward way of going through life! All over a hole!
And the funny thing in all this is that there are more women in the world than men! The odds are actually in OUR favor!
It’s all f*cked to hell though because 80% of the men out there will wipe a woman’s sh*tty *ss with their tongue if she told them to.
Because so many men don’t act like men at all, but instead either act like horn dogs just so happy to get some p*ssy OR like little babies throwing temper tantrums, women have turned into narcissistic sociopaths (not all, but a lot).
Man, 40 years ago we’d be telling women to stand up for themselves and not to let some man define their life. Now it’s gone the other way! Men need to start standing up for themselves and not let some woman f*ck up their life.
This philosophy may not get you more women, but I guarantee you it will make you 100% happier.
Loved the fox hole analogy.
Women today are ruthless. Because society has been telling them for the past 20-40 years that they’ve been wrong done by, they now feel as though anything they do is excusable. And you know something, society backs that up more often than not. And also, because women are sly in how they go about things (very good at making their bad behavior seem like YOUR fault), they never get called on their sh*t.
Not all women are this way, but I tell ya, a hell of a lot are. Women know they can get away with murder now a days, and they are!
The ONLY recourse you have as a man is to walk the f*ck away from a woman the moment she starts exhibiting narcissistic, irrational, untrustworthy behavior.
And it’s really sad that men are so damn hard on themselves over the childish, inane and immature behavior some women exhibit. You are making THEM the prize. Which is the ass backward way of going through life! All over a hole!
And the funny thing in all this is that there are more women in the world than men! The odds are actually in OUR favor!
It’s all f*cked to hell though because 80% of the men out there will wipe a woman’s sh*tty *ss with their tongue if she told them to.
Because so many men don’t act like men at all, but instead either act like horn dogs just so happy to get some p*ssy OR like little babies throwing temper tantrums, women have turned into narcissistic sociopaths (not all, but a lot).
Man, 40 years ago we’d be telling women to stand up for themselves and not to let some man define their life. Now it’s gone the other way! Men need to start standing up for themselves and not let some woman f*ck up their life.
This philosophy may not get you more women, but I guarantee you it will make you 100% happier.
Victory Unlimited
Master Don Juan
Exactly Joekerr.
It seems that the PR campaign that this post feminism culture has run has over-did what it was orignally designed to do. IF it was designed for benevolent reasons in the first place...lol.
Yeah, they used to say "What's good for the goose is good for the gander". But now they should just say "If it's good for the gander, who the hell CARES about the goose anymore???" lol
I LOVE women. (Unfortunately) I was mostly raised by women. And I work with MOSTLY women. I have a lot of GREAT platonic-type dealings with women as it pertains to family, old high-school friends, some co-workers, etc.
I see daily SO many great things that women are on the inside. It just pains me that that all seems to go underground in the context of the male/female sexually-based relationship dynamic. The reality of the fact that when a man makes his romantic interest known to a woman, and she THEN (in her mind) behaves as if battle lines are drawn, still really gets to me sometimes..
Dude, I have found that it is ONLY in the context of sexually defined relationships that my dealings with women become so combative (see----LTR (preferred), STR (casualty of my war to FIND a worthy LTR), and even a ONS (fluke-type situations where I'm usually wondering the next day "What the Fukk JUST happened???). lol
So the thing IS, although I LOVE women in the AGAPE/Biblical sense...I often find MANY of them hard to LIKE due to their behavior in the male/female relationship arena.
Why? Because of THEIR double-standard. On the one hand, they want to be treated with total equality. But on the other hand, they still want chivalry AND special preferrential treatment. Does anybody else see a problem with this? lol
I think that women ABSOLUTELY deserve an EQUAL share of everything life has to offer. I just think that the problem is that now many of them seem to feel ENTITLED to have more and mORe, and MORE than everybody else on the planet!!! (or at least here in the United States they do..lol).
It seems there is a level of gender anger, gender vengeance, and/or spiritual UPSET that seems to manifest itself whenever men and women try to get close---in the relationship sense.
It really IS a power struggle out here. And I feel that the one who ultimately wins this power struggle SHOULD be the one with the best interest of BOTH parties in mind. And in my opinion, that should be the LEAST maliciously selfish individual out of the two.
And in Trae22's situation, I suspect that that person is HIM. And since the evidence now points to the fact that his girl may now only be out for HERSELF, then I agree that he should probably seek primarily what's in HIS own best interest now.
Because by breaking the implied fidelity agreement of their relationship, his girlfriend has now forfeited all her rights to "preferrential" treatment.
Yes, we should really stop making excuses for SOME women's choices to act irresponsibly and to deny their accountability for their own actions.
Hey, I know some of 'em may be "small", but women ARE NOT children...
Peace...one day.
It seems that the PR campaign that this post feminism culture has run has over-did what it was orignally designed to do. IF it was designed for benevolent reasons in the first place...lol.
Yeah, they used to say "What's good for the goose is good for the gander". But now they should just say "If it's good for the gander, who the hell CARES about the goose anymore???" lol
I LOVE women. (Unfortunately) I was mostly raised by women. And I work with MOSTLY women. I have a lot of GREAT platonic-type dealings with women as it pertains to family, old high-school friends, some co-workers, etc.
I see daily SO many great things that women are on the inside. It just pains me that that all seems to go underground in the context of the male/female sexually-based relationship dynamic. The reality of the fact that when a man makes his romantic interest known to a woman, and she THEN (in her mind) behaves as if battle lines are drawn, still really gets to me sometimes..
Dude, I have found that it is ONLY in the context of sexually defined relationships that my dealings with women become so combative (see----LTR (preferred), STR (casualty of my war to FIND a worthy LTR), and even a ONS (fluke-type situations where I'm usually wondering the next day "What the Fukk JUST happened???). lol
So the thing IS, although I LOVE women in the AGAPE/Biblical sense...I often find MANY of them hard to LIKE due to their behavior in the male/female relationship arena.
Why? Because of THEIR double-standard. On the one hand, they want to be treated with total equality. But on the other hand, they still want chivalry AND special preferrential treatment. Does anybody else see a problem with this? lol
I think that women ABSOLUTELY deserve an EQUAL share of everything life has to offer. I just think that the problem is that now many of them seem to feel ENTITLED to have more and mORe, and MORE than everybody else on the planet!!! (or at least here in the United States they do..lol).
It seems there is a level of gender anger, gender vengeance, and/or spiritual UPSET that seems to manifest itself whenever men and women try to get close---in the relationship sense.
It really IS a power struggle out here. And I feel that the one who ultimately wins this power struggle SHOULD be the one with the best interest of BOTH parties in mind. And in my opinion, that should be the LEAST maliciously selfish individual out of the two.
And in Trae22's situation, I suspect that that person is HIM. And since the evidence now points to the fact that his girl may now only be out for HERSELF, then I agree that he should probably seek primarily what's in HIS own best interest now.
Because by breaking the implied fidelity agreement of their relationship, his girlfriend has now forfeited all her rights to "preferrential" treatment.
Yes, we should really stop making excuses for SOME women's choices to act irresponsibly and to deny their accountability for their own actions.
Hey, I know some of 'em may be "small", but women ARE NOT children...
Peace...one day.
hehe they may be small, but women have become extremely adapt at using their weaknesses as their greatest strengths.
they are just as intelligent as men and know what the score is at any given time. but add to that their ability to manipulate situations with emotional reactions, and for those reactions (tactics) to be justified because they are "weaker" and you got yourself a dangerous kitten
i love women also. and i've met some GREAT women out there. a lot of women are afraid of getting hurt and pull a lot of bullsh*t to protect themselves - even though it usually just ends up getting them hurt. hehe.
but at the same time, i've really begun to notice that women are really pushing the boundaries. they are becoming more masculine. it's like more than half the women want you to know that they have a set of balls. hehe.
oh well. in the grand scheme of things doesn't really matter much to me whats going on with 99% of the world. im just focused on myself, my goals, and my immediate surrounding.
if a great chic comes along great. until then im just happy that over the years i've developed the ability to see bullsh*t when its right in front of me. it's saved me a lot of needless drama.
they are just as intelligent as men and know what the score is at any given time. but add to that their ability to manipulate situations with emotional reactions, and for those reactions (tactics) to be justified because they are "weaker" and you got yourself a dangerous kitten
i love women also. and i've met some GREAT women out there. a lot of women are afraid of getting hurt and pull a lot of bullsh*t to protect themselves - even though it usually just ends up getting them hurt. hehe.
but at the same time, i've really begun to notice that women are really pushing the boundaries. they are becoming more masculine. it's like more than half the women want you to know that they have a set of balls. hehe.
oh well. in the grand scheme of things doesn't really matter much to me whats going on with 99% of the world. im just focused on myself, my goals, and my immediate surrounding.
if a great chic comes along great. until then im just happy that over the years i've developed the ability to see bullsh*t when its right in front of me. it's saved me a lot of needless drama.
Victory Unlimited
Master Don Juan
True. lol
A pair of "Bullshyt Blockers" (shades that let you see-thru shyt) SHOULD come as a complimentary gift for every new member who joins this site.
Moderaters: See what you can do about making that happen please...
lol
A pair of "Bullshyt Blockers" (shades that let you see-thru shyt) SHOULD come as a complimentary gift for every new member who joins this site.
Moderaters: See what you can do about making that happen please...
lol
Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.