I think my ex-"Best Friend" is spying on me after hard NC

[goodganji44]

Hi guys. I've been lurking on this site for the past few months and I must say that this site has been instrumental in my own self improvement and the understanding and psychology of how women operate. Today I would like to share my story for those who care to read and I desperately need advice from the more experienced DJ's here.


I've known my "best friend" for 10 years. She's bats*t insane but deep down a good woman(she does fit some of the BPD traits). Very dominant woman and loves to control the frame. Admittedly I made AFC mistakes early on but as I started to learn her and the game itself, I made less and less over time. I ended up getting the poon once and only once.

Several months later, all things were well until she went until a Disneyland trip with her child's father. She immediately went on facebook, boasting about how well the trip was going and posting pictures etc. In the meantime she's texting me saying that she loves me(smelled like BS from a mile away, did not respond). I kept it cool. I didn't say anything and just allowed her to enjoy her trip.


As I got the LJBF treatment for the last time, I said F this sht and I started gaming other women immediately and gave less of my attention to the best friend. Eventually these other women were making passes online and I suppose she saw this. Then she started posting pictures of her kissing other women, and some of those stupid motivational quotes that btches like to post that was related to me.

I ignored all of it.

While I was in a studio session. Her nephew whom I work with asked me in what I felt was in some kind of hidden intent, have I met my aunt's new BF. I kept it cool, but on the inside I was furious. I felt like I was disrespected by having these kinds of topics pop up in my place of business. Simply put, I didn't want to hear that sht.

After that moment, I felt like enough was enough. I was sick of her garbage and her stringing me along, I came to the realization that I was wasting my time. Before I deleted her off my facebook, I said some very hurtful(albeit true) things about her. Really didn't care about how she felt about it at all. I told her to never contact me again and pretend like I don't even exist.

She was apologetic in her response, said that I was a great guy, I was right about everything I said about her, the reason why she kept me as a friend is because she felt like she didn't deserve a great guy like myself. I thought it was BS when I read it and decided not to reply.

After I deleted her off of my facebook, I spoke with all of my mutual friends about the situation and they all agreed to delete her as well. This was done to avoid any traps she might throw at me to get my attention through third party sources. I still have her sister on my FB but I took her off my news feed, so I'm not able to see any of her posts.


Ever since then I have done hardcore NC. The only news I've heard about her is that she briefly shut down her facebook page after I did what I did and that she's no longer at the same job anymore. Other than that, I have not went to her facebook, distanced myself from ALL members of her family(including the nephew mentioned in the earlier paragraph).

The healing process has been tremendous. I've moved on to banging other chicks, doubled my income, moved out into my own place, receiving income off of playing Madden, and changed bad habits about myself that were there during our friendship. I did and still do miss her, but it got to a point where I felt like "She ain't coming back and I'm definitely not going to make any efforts either". I was cool with that as I've bettered my life to a point where she or no other woman really matters.

Then I get an game invite on FB from her sister's FB page, and the profile pic isn't her sister, it's the LJBF chick. She used to always send me these invites to these stupid games back when we were talking. She does know her sister's passwords and this isn't the first time she's hacked her sister's page to fool around on FB. My spider sense is telling me that I'm being watched.

My intuition is telling me that her hamster is spinning but for what reasons I don't know.

Now that time has passed, eventually I do want to get one last bang out of her if she comes back. She's a very prideful woman and stubborn beyond belief. I'd be interested in re-visiting the friendship, only if it's on my terms.

My question to the experienced DJ's on here is this, given that me and her to have a legitimate emotional connection and solid friendship before I bounced, and the facts above, what's the likelihood of me hearing from her again based on some of your past experiences?


Any and all criticism and advice would be much appreciated. I've been in No Contact since 6/23/2012.

 

[Gunner26]

10 Years wow, that's a long time, like half my lifetime haha. You seem to have done the right thing, you don't want to be putting up with this sort of stuff anymore, I have only a handful of friends I've known that long, all male and there is a reason for it. In response to your question I reckon that she may well try and contact you, however I have a feeling she might just be looking to lure you back in, just so that she can end it on her terms, so watchout.

A pump and dump may well be on the cards, if that's what your after. Don't go looking for it though, you went NC for a reason. If she does contact, play it cool, whatever you do, don't get re-attatched, 10 years of friendship and you know she's bat**** crazy, that route probably won't end well.

Also if she is keeping tabs on you through her sisters facebook, to me its weird behaviour, and probably means that she will try contact you soon. Perhaps put a picture or two up of you with some other women and see if she bites, if she does you know what to do.

Anyways just my opinion.

Gunner

 

[foreverAFC]

lol after all that you still want her, let go man

 

[GotED?]

Why do you still want to do her one more time??

I find your intentions purely of someone still having one-itis. Do you have so few other options that you still think about her?

Man up and move on - you don't do hard NC just to play game and get her back.

As far as I can tell, you are still the loser in this game.

 

[SgtSplacker]

I never completely rule out a girl, if only because they get turned on by being treated that way, and the chances of her coming around then are considerable. I always keep my doors open, but I will definitely allow myself to lose interest and just fall out of touch. (move her to the back of the line, but she's still in line) kinda snapping on a girl like you did already shows you care about your relationship but were disappointed about something. Don't overdo it.

With that being said, if you want to talk to her go ahead. But make sure it does not look like you were seeking her out at all. You must maintain your position of power and indifference towards her. This is a chance for HER to make things up to YOU, just don't be too hard on her. She must understand that if she wants a relationship with you that she must win you over.

I had a situation like this with a girl, I would kinda pass by places where she would hang saw her one day, acted surprised and we hooked up after that. Me getting pissed showed her I did care, I was not going to deal with her BS, and set a strong frame of dominance over her. It's awesome when a girl is trying to make you happy as opposed to the constant testing to see if you are a better man than every tom, Richard, and harry she sees.

 

[vatoloco]

I've known my "best friend" for 10 years. She's bats*t insane but deep down a good woman

I stopped reading right here.

Tsk, tsk, tsk...

 

[Alvafe]

I agree with vataloco, if she was any good she wouldn't that pain in the ass, dude drop all what you think of her, she is not good on anything, also try putting the age on your profile and her age,

but for me I would say why even bother to have her sister? from what I know sisters use each other facebook, also you are still thinking on her too much to use teh pump and dumb card, i'm guessing you can't pull that off and will fall on her trap again.

and why you care so much with a woman who have already another man kids? find one single without one (not hard), and who are not that stupid, if all the improvement you say you did is true, it should be easy, you did NC to get free from that parasite, so keep living your life well and let her rot for all you should care.

 

[goodganji44]

I agree with vataloco, if she was any good she wouldn't that pain in the ass, dude drop all what you think of her, she is not good on anything, also try putting the age on your profile and her age,

but for me I would say why even bother to have her sister? from what I know sisters use each other facebook, also you are still thinking on her too much to use teh pump and dumb card, i'm guessing you can't pull that off and will fall on her trap again.

and why you care so much with a woman who have already another man kids? find one single without one (not hard), and who are not that stupid, if all the improvement you say you did is true, it should be easy, you did NC to get free from that parasite, so keep living your life well and let her rot for all you should care.

The purpose of me creating this thread is exactly for that reason. If she tries to come back in my life, my intentions are definitely for pump and dump. The NC period helped me seperate reity from emotion. Regardless of how I felt at the time, the reality is that she didnt want me, so I bounced.

Yes Im at a state of indifference now about how I feel about her now. I choose to remember the positives and the times when she helped me out during a rough time my life.The moment I felt like I moved on completely, was the moment she started this stuff that Im typing

If I see an opportunity for a good lay Im going to take it. I can comfortably say that I could re-engage this without giving two shts what the outcome would be. Either I smash, or I go NC again...either way I win.

 

[pdx1138]

I definitely understand where you're coming from and I've had thoughts like that as well with an ex like yours, but in all seriousness, if you had better options, YOU KNOW you wouldn't give two s.hits about this psychotic woman from your past.

If it were me I would resist that urge and forget about her completely.

There are a TON of better women out there, you just haven't discovered them yet.

 

[goodganji44]

I definitely understand where you're coming from and I've had thoughts like that as well with an ex like yours, but in all seriousness, if you had better options, YOU KNOW you wouldn't give two s.hits about this psychotic woman from your past.

If it were me I would resist that urge and forget about her completely.

There are a TON of better women out there, you just haven't discovered them yet.

You're right.

When I started playing the field again and chicks were flirting with me on fb, thats when I came to the realization that options is power. She obviously realized this as well hence her responses.

This is all hypothetically speaking of course. She has to make the effort to reconcile first,or I'll continue NC till I die. When I ditched her. I had the full expectation that I would never hear from her again. Based on her recent antics, Im starting to think I could be wrong.