I think Im not mentally stable enough for a relationship

[captain55]

Looking back at my last relationship I was a real piece of ****. I cheated on her multiple times. I led her on and told her I was gonna marry her when the truth is I just kept her around for sex. I wasted her prime from 23-26. She went from a hb9 to a hb7. Now she was no saint, she was a bpd and put me through hell but thats besides the point.

The main thing Im trying to figure out, I stayed with her only because I didn't like the idea of her banging someone else.... not because I really liked her that much or because the sex was amazing. I just felt like she was my property. Have any of you guys been in similar situations.... Where you stayed in a relationship simply because you didn't like the idea of your woman being with someone else?

Im grateful I went through what I went through because it taught me a lot....most importantly to never cheat again. The guilt is just not worth it.

Been playing the field for now but would like to get in a relationship eventually I just wanna make sure the above problems are "normal" issues and Im not some psychopath.

Being able to successfully leave her, and never go back....despite knowing she was going to eventually sleep with other men inevitably was a big milestone for me...took me a year and a half to completely let her go (I know I should of broken up with her 6 months into dating and we dated two years) so I guess thats "some" positive growth on my end.

 

[Rapport101]

You sound like a nut job to me lol. You sure she is the one with BPD?

 

[captain55]

You sound like a nut job to me lol. You sure she is the one with BPD?

Of course I went no contact and started banging other women. Unlike 99% of men that go back to their bpd ex I didn't...she hovered me multiple times. Im just trying to figure out the sick side of me that stayed with her as long as I did.

 

[Murk]

I kept my ex because I was comfortable, I cheated on her with 4 different women, flirted with other girls in front of her in the early days (including her best friend and another girl she caught me - broke up, I won her back within 2 weeks), and stopped spending money on her (we both became very stingy with money probably me more so). But I never cared about her banging someone else, we joked about threesomes.

In one of our arguments she outright said to me "you don't want a girlfriend you just want someone to fvck and be there", I protested, but she was right. I didn't treat her well enough because I didn't care, never saw a future with her, never introduced her to my family, never took her on many nice meals or dates after the initial 3/4 months and she was upset about all these things.

I think it's just selfish behaviour, nothing psychopathic, maybe lack of empathy (she accused me of all these too).

Looking back, she knew what I was about, she was no fool. "You had plenty of chances to treat me right" - her parting words.

Just make sure you go LTR with someone you GENUINELY want to be with - or it's a waste of both yours an her time/emotion/money.

 

[guru1000]

Captain, this is what happens when use you testosterone beyond natural physiological levels, especially at your young age. You lose your rational thought process.

My advice will be a bit different. Get off the testosterone (at least until you are in your mid 30s or blood shows natural T under 600 ng/dl.)

You will lose muscle. And? You will pick up more women at 5'11" 180-195 lbs, 10% bf, and proportional then you will at 225 lbs. More importantly, you will have a rational base from which to formulate logical, propitious thinking and conclusions to plan your future (outside of the gym).

 

[captain55]

Captain, this is what happens when use you testosterone beyond natural physiological levels, especially at your young age. You lose your rational thought process.

My advice will be a bit different. Get off the testosterone (at least until you are in your mid 30s or blood shows natural T under 600 ng/dl.)

You will lose muscle. And? You will pick up more women at 5'11" 180-195 lbs, 10% bf, and proportional then you will at 225 lbs. More importantly, you will have a rational base from which to formulate logical, propitious thinking and conclusions to plan your future (outside of the gym).

So you think my steroid abuse is what has caused this?

Captain, this is what happens when use you testosterone beyond natural physiological levels, especially at your young age. You lose your rational thought process.

My advice will be a bit different. Get off the testosterone (at least until you are in your mid 30s or blood shows natural T under 600 ng/dl.)

You will lose muscle. And? You will pick up more women at 5'11" 180-195 lbs, 10% bf, and proportional then you will at 225 lbs. More importantly, you will have a rational base from which to formulate logical, propitious thinking and conclusions to plan your future (outside of the gym).

So you think uses high doses of test would make someone lose their rational thought process?

 

[Murk]

Don't listen to guru - plenty of guys do this.

It's just us being selfish, sly, bastards.

 

[guru1000]

So you think my steroid abuse is what has caused this?


So you think uses high doses of test would make someone lose their rational thought process?

At your age, early 20s, absolutely. Even for older guys this applies. Unfortunately, I cannot cite studies that show T above 1000 ng/dl affects rational thinking. I speak from experience, and know many that have traveled down this road.

Keep T under 1000 ng/dl to be directed by rational thought. You can cruise with 100-200 grams per week and remain "good." You're a young man with the world ahead of you. Don't waste your best years.

 

[marmel75]

At your age, early 20s, absolutely. Even for older guys this applies. Unfortunately, I cannot cite studies that show T above 1000 ng/dl affects rational thinking. I speak from experience, and know many that have traveled down this road.

Keep T under 1000 ng/dl to be directed by rational thought. You can cruise with 100-200 grams per week and remain "good." You're a young man with the world ahead of you. Don't waste your best years.

From what ive heard/seen/felt the higher androgen levels get the shorter your fuse and the more likely you are to "flip" at little stuff.

This is especially true on things like Tren, Anadrol, etc...high test levels cause different reactions depending on the person...some get really chilled out in a "I'm God you can't do sh!t to me" way and others tend to be more aggressive...

If OP is on heavy steroids I certainly hooe he is doing something to combat the excess calcification going on in his body with high doses of Vitamin D3, K2 and Magnesium Oil to keep his arteries unclogged.

 

[guru1000]

From what ive heard/seen/felt the higher androgen levels get the shorter your fuse and the more likely you are to "flip" at little stuff.

This is especially true on things like Tren, Anadrol, etc...high test levels cause difderent reactions depending on the person...some get really chilled out in a "I'm God you can't do sh!t to me" way and others tend to be more aggressive...

Yup. Also there is simply no need for total T above 1000 ng/dl. You can build plenty of muscle with that amount of total T, especially incorporating that with a great diet.

 

[The Diver]

I led her on and told her I was gonna marry her when the truth is I just kept her around for sex. I wasted her prime from 23-26. She went from a hb9 to a hb7.

The reason anyone would hold his girls with fake marriage promises for 3 years (and fu*cked up thier prime time) , and for fear of someone else will fu* ck her, is hugh insecurity and fu*cked up Ego. Many doing it b'cos many are fu*cked up persons.

 

[soulforge]

I'm losing count of the ridiculous amount of undiagnosed woman on this site!

 

[fanatic22]

This is typical ego + inexperience. Tons of guys either are or were like this, myself included. Even now if I see a plate's snapstory at some bar or something I get pangs of jealousy, even if I just got done banging a similarly attractive woman. I think to some extent men are programmed to claim and protect what is "theirs". I've recognized it as a weakness and refuse to let it dictate my actions. Controlling behavior is very unhealthy.

 

[Von]

Steroid? No wonder you wanna bang all the time.

Steroid kill your ability to get hard.

Of course you have issues, you are on SoSuave and you posted threads about the bad stuff.

You need to man up.

Steroid will bêta you until you turn gay

 

[Rapport101]

I'm losing count of the ridiculous amount of undiagnosed woman on this site!

In all fairness though 20% of women are bat **** lunatics

 

[wifehunter]

 

[wifehunter]

I'm losing count of the ridiculous amount of undiagnosed woman on this site!

Always assume crazy!

 

[RichardTheFrog]

Relationships are a social construct and an imaginary concept.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

In all fairness though 20% of women are bat **** lunatics

I think that "being female" should be classified as a mental disorder.