I think I'm loosing progress

[Mage Xtil]

Hi guys, I was wondering if any of you have advice for me. About 10 months ago I joined my local gym and have been going very regularly, got my learners permit and did driving school and started taking my 3rd french class. However despite advancing in a few things I still have problems improving my social life and lowering my harmful behaviors such as...

Cutting my video gaming down
Cutting down on the time I spend browsing webcomics, tailers and internet in general, so I don't get sucked in as much
Cutting the free downloading of games
I need to increase my social skills with all types of people.

The reason I'm posting in the High school forum even though I'm 22 is because I feel as though I still have the same skills as I did have back then, four years ago, basically the same person. My social life as actually gone down hill since I don't have to talk to people my own age with my job.

I see that I have really been hurting myself socially and I'm now at a disadvantage since I have missed out on alot and don't have any friends. Has anyone been in this situation? How will/did you get out of this mess?

Mage Xtil

 

[DJ_Matthew]

Hi guys, I was wondering if any of you have advice for me. About 10 months ago I joined my local gym and have been going very regularly, got my learners permit and did driving school and started taking my 3rd french class. However despite advancing in a few things I still have problems improving my social life and lowering my harmful behaviors such as...

Cutting my video gaming down
Cutting down on the time I spend browsing webcomics, tailers and internet in general, so I don't get sucked in as much
Cutting the free downloading of games
I need to increase my social skills with all types of people.

The reason I'm posting in the High school forum even though I'm 22 is because I feel as though I still have the same skills as I did have back then, four years ago, basically the same person. My social life as actually gone down hill since I don't have to talk to people my own age with my job.

I see that I have really been hurting myself socially and I'm now at a disadvantage since I have missed out on alot and don't have any friends. Has anyone been in this situation? How will/did you get out of this mess?

Mage Xtil

I hear you bro, especially because I'm a computer wiz.

I'm starting to improve a lot. You have to get up on your own and go out. No one will do it for you.

Start by talking to random people and just have a small conversation or even have a simple hi to start off. When you feel more comfortable, start talking to good looking girls and have longer conversations.

 

[faiNt`]

I used to get nervous sitting next to a girl simply to share a book. Go ahead, laugh, I know I do when I think back on it. I'm guessing you're at the level of ..

HB: "Do you have a pencil I can barrow?"
You: "Yes."

Am I right? Don't feel ashamed or guilty in anyway because pity doesn't help anyone, just know that YOU are the only one who can change it. What I want you to do is, instead of turning on the computer next Friday night, drive a ways to a town that you don't live close enough to that anyone will know you. Now you can act however the fvk you want, and have nothing to worry about.

Just mess around, go up to girls and be like "nice shoes, wanna fvk?" who cares what they think/do you won't ever see them again unless it's a yes. Win win situation if you ask me. I'd do the same thing, but hell, I can't even drive yet .

Good luck

EDIT:// Censor

 

[ecilop]

This might be really hard but if you're committed to helping yourself play less games and spend less time on the computer, I think it will help you tremendously

Put a time limit for yourself on the computer.

Seriously.

It sounds like something a parent would do to a kid but it will truly help you. Get a timer or a digital one on the computer and see how much you're typically using a day. Then cut down 10 minutes each day.

You'll start seeing yourself actually doing more productive and fun stuff on the computer instead of trolling around for hours

 

[rkc09]

I used to get nervous sitting next to a girl simply to share a book. Go ahead, laugh, I know I do when I think back on it. I'm guessing you're at the level of ..

HB: "Do you have a pencil I can barrow?"
You: "Yes."


EDIT:// Censor

What do you mean by this?

 

[Mage Xtil]

I think he means that the response should be C+F maybe. Its actually quite funny since I remember being asked that question quite a few times in HS.

 

[john paul]

Get rid of those video games. You gotta break the addiction and get your time and life back. I use to game all the time but I somehow managed to take it out of my life and its so much better.

I wish I could tell you how I did it but i dont know. I just went cold turkey and didn't play for like a week and I barely play at all anymore. It was hard but im not even interested in them anymore.

 

[Triple T]

Cut down on games, unless you play with some buds once in awhile.
Cut down on the computer, unless it benefits you. Don't just go on to waste time. Go on to learn some skillz, ex: dating.

As said before, if you cut it out for like a week then it'll get easy. My cable was out for a month and playing games just bore the hell out of me anyways. DON'T WASTE MONEY on games. No more buying games, only once in awhile you can reward yourself. (perhaps if you achieve a personal goal?)


Now, go out and find a hobbie. Ex: snowboarding, paintballing, arts, etc. etc. anything at all where it involves people AND something you like!

Now go there, and start meeting some new people. I'm a mountain biker, at my local hill I always meet new and interesting people everyday. When I go on the chairlift and I sit next to a stranger I start up a conversation, and more often than not they come riding with me down some of the trails and we become friends from there.


Just don't get all negative man, the mind is a powerful thing...trust me
What the mind of man can concieve, the mind of man can achieve. Remember that.

I used to be in the very situation your in, but just get a little hobby going, soon you'll wonder why you ever played games because they were such a waste of time.(as i'm wondering right now)

But good on you for taking the first step to success! Which is seeking help.