I think I screwed up

[DjCool]

Hello guys,
I am 26 and havent had much luck with girls.A few dates but nothing special.
There was this once chick at office with whom I felt there were some vibes.She seemed interested for a while.
But here is the problem.

Whenever I tried to get a little closer she would hold back.So I held back and she would get back to normal and this went on for a couple of months.

recently ,I kind of asked her out and since then she has been really cold.Trying to ignore and say dumb/rude things. But I still kind of feel she is interested at some level.But one more move from me and she would never talk again. May be she feels threatened or something.

Any idea what I should do to de fuse the situation? Should I tell her I am not running behind her. I think she wants things to happen more naturally,but I cant figure out how to do that without making a move or taking things.
Its not that we work together or something.So i dont interact regularly with her,so I need to make some move without making her feel uncomfortable.


Please ..some ideas.

 

[Heretolearn]

1. Read bible and everything else on this site


2. get at least 3 more girls in your life


3. Chill out with this girl and treat her as a friend

See how she responds, ask her out, no then be friends or move on

 

[DjCool]

so does this mean I have no chance with this girl?
I actually did ask her out a couple of times
although when I did it one more time I got the sour grapes.

Anyway,advice well taken.
Just one more Q.

Is making a girl jealous going to work? May be she would think I am more desirable if I was seen with other women.
CorrecT?

 

[MacAvoy]

Originally posted by DjCool
so does this mean I have no chance with this girl?

Yes.

This is the mentality that you need to succeed. Otherwise your going to be back here and say I'm 40 years old and I've only ever been w/ 4 women. The choice is yours. Read the bible and start bootcamp.

 

[Desdinova]

I actually did ask her out a couple of times

If you need to ask her more than once, she doesn't find you attractive.

If you give a bit more detail about how you asked her out and the responses she gave, we might be able to figure out what your problem is.

 

[DjCool]

Well ,
She is a fan of harry potter and I asked her if she wanted to go to the new harry potter movie..She said she really wanted to but was busy.
Again I asked her out for a play and she said she was going out with other friends.
After this she began to give cold vibes.

The problem is she gives mixed signals.sometimes she says hi first and other times doesnt.

Also,I did give a little gift on her bday(not roses or teddy bears but some gym accessory which she may find useful).
She told me I shouldnt have given the gift and but later on she got normal so I asked her out again and ever since she has been cold.

I have tried my best not to be too needy and clingy but any time i make a move she draws back.Even being C&F doesnt seem to work anymore although thats what got us so far.Nowadays she just retorts back and I can sense some anger/rudeness.

Looks like I must move on.but any clues about what I did wrong?

 

[Jamo]

well

Just read the bible and it will be so clear what you did wrong.

 

[DjCool]

I am reading it..still on chapter 3.
but havent got any clue? Is it me being too much of a wuss?

 

[Tazman]

Based on your description she's never really been "hot". She's being cold because she doesn't want to have to tell you outright that she isn't interested in you. For god's sake leave her alone.

 

[tmpgstx]

She may have a boyfriend and was using you for attention. At times, some AWs when having problems with their boyfriend will seek the attention (just attention) of said male at workplace or where-ever. She will not tell she has a boyfriend as she may need your attention again.

When you bust a move, she doesn't want to take it to the next level because of her boyfriend, but she will not tell you she has a boyfriend. She wants to keep her fan base.

It is likely the reason for mixed signals.

 

[DjCool]

Thanks guys.
What do you mean by recipe? I got the bible and am on chap 4 now.
Wish me luck