I think I Matrix bullet dodged this chick lol...

[NotSoSuave]

Hey guys, first post, need some feedback...long read but you'll probably get a few laughs.

So I started seeing this girl from work (I know...), 24, 6 months out of a alleged abusive LTR of 5 yrs.

Gorgeous, 8-9, gets hit on all the time...

Been working together for 2 yrs, she told me she's liked me the whole time... how I never hit on her, told me she felt I ignored her... which I did, not in a negative way, I was friendly but not all on her as she was with her BF.

My guards are up from the get go... I play it cool though.

First date, she mentions her "crazy ex" can pop up at any time... She goes to the bathroom, Im outside texting, see her coming back in the corner of my eye, finish my text and she says "You know, someone can walk up and do something to you without you even noticing" Now, at this point, first date and all I'm thinking whatever, it's not like we're getting married...

Second date I take her back to my place, no sex, I tell her we should wait and do it right. Now, I meant this, I don't want to rush things as we work together...

Now, the **** test extravaganza starts... every chance she gets, she tells me all these guys are hitting on her and want her number and FB bla bla bla. I tell her jokingly, "give them both lol" or just ignore it.

One time we're sitting by a lake, real peaceful... she asks me "What would you do if someone came and tried to kill us" to which I reply "I would throw you infront of him and run" and laugh it off. She didn't think it was funny at all... Before all this, she told me her "friend" was asleep at her place, how she's having problems with her man, he takes off his wedding ring when he goes out bla bla bla... In hindsight, I'm thinking maybe her ex was asleep at her place hmmm....

5th or 6th time we get together at my place, she's acting all nervous... blabbering on and on, she slips in that her ex contacted her last night, how this guy at work is interested and knows her ex's older brother, confusing the **** out of me... I ignore all of that and take her to the bedroom and as I am taking her pants off she says "I think we should wait..."

Now this is where I **** up...

All this **** testing, talking about other guys, her ex, it has gotten to me... But I calmly get up, and say "Ok baby..." and I help her up... She goes on to say how we should wait because I don't trust her... I lose my ****, long story short, I ask her to leave.

BECAUSE I NEVER SAID THAT...

We've been seeing eachother for a month now...

A week before, she was acting all strange and paranoid, she met up with a "friend" before... we met up for a walk and she's asking all sorts of weird questions... I sit her down and ask her whats up, why is she being all weird, asked her to please be honest since I have a hard time trusting people, so just be honest... tell me whats going on.

Back to me asking her to leave, she writes me long ass letter telling me things I can't even relate to... I swear on my life, If I make a mistake Im the first to admit it but if felt like she was projecting... I apologize for basically throwing her out.

I see her twice, I apologize again and tell her I want to make things right...

She tells me:

"You have trouble letting people in" "You're gonna have nightmares about me"

She's being all cold and distant, telling me Im giving her mixed signals... I ask how, she says "Sometimes you leave work and you never say goodbye"

Now my patience is basically on E, I tell her she needs to get her **** straight, I've apoligized and If she wants to move on from this we can do it together. She gets all angry, comes over, we end up in bed... tells me again "I'm not having sex with you til you trust me" GODDAMIT, I NEVER said that!!!

Now, I feel like whatever I do I lose... If I tell her that she's right, then Im admitting to not trusting her. If I don't, no sex... I stick to my guns and become more distant.

She accuses me of having a girlfriend, I reply jokingly that I do.

She tells me her mother is forcing her to get married to her ex, I reply that I expect an invitation. I ask her if she needs some time and space, she replies "I would understand if you would want to give me space..." In my mind I'm like *****, you should be throwing your arms around me telling me not to go...but...

I tell her we need a break, go fix that ****, I can't tell your mother what to do, not after 2 months. I don't reply to her text, take her off FB...

A week goes by, and magically the whole forced marriage is "solved".

Now I'm like... solved? Why didn't you call?

I'm asking normal, basic questions... why do you have to get married to someone who abused you? Cheated on you? Your mother didn't even like him, why is she forcing you to marry him? She tells me that I'm fussy, basically dodging all these logical questions.

A few days later she dumps me, I go see her and tell her I don't want her to go but if she wants to she can. She takes it back, saying that I'm humble now and "You have to lose once in a while" Now I'm mentally drained, I can't do this playing it cool anymore...So I tell her after a couple of days that it's over. She accuses me of being wishy-washy, playing hard to get etc etc.
The End

I'm thinking she had BPD... I'll come back and write some more of the bizarre things that happened.

 

[The Gambler]

Holy f*cking f*ckwads.

That was a good read indeed, thanks.... I think you know there's no future with this gal -- she's a loon. It's just a matter of how far you wish to go with her before it all falls apart. To be honest, I'd be friendly as hell to her at this point, but would not do anything thing else. The reason why? -- you WORK with this BAT SH!T CRAZY B!TCH! There are 100 different ways she can ruin your career, including getting a retraining order against you because now she thinks you're stalking her.

I've seen crazy before... then there's THIS gal. You gotta bail my friend. You gotta.

The Gambler

 

[The Gambler]

Ghost that $hit and never look back.

True dat. But he works with her, which is why I recommend that he be cordial to her in the workplace. Other than that, time to exit rapido.

 

[NotSoSuave]

I should add, this happened between may-july... A good portion of july I was away on vacation and we really didnt hang out too much. Trust me after that whole forced wedding and fake dumping bullsh1t I walked away. Too much drama, it took its toll on me. I havn't looked back.

Im friendly and professional at work, I do sense some guys looking at me sideways, a bunch of pussies really, dirty looks are all they give and I've basically ignored that. Maybe I should talk to my boss about the whole thing, she's a revenge freak lol. I prt scr all of our last text convos too...

 

[( . )( . )]

That was painful. I see alot of attempted reasoning and pleading with a bird who takes her role as a cluster B seriously. Why not just throw yourself on a bed of cheese graters and be done with it?

 

[NotSoSuave]

She went super hard with the drama after she told me "Why are you so calm? How come ur not like all these other guys?" I didnt take that as a good thing lol...

When I broke things off I told her why, she said "You never listened to me..." That I took as a great compliment, her voodoo didnt work.

 

[betheman]

She went super hard with the drama after she told me "Why are you so calm? How come ur not like all these other guys?" I didnt take that as a good thing lol...

When I broke things off I told her why, she said "You never listened to me..." That I took as a great compliment, her voodoo didnt work.

That is a good thing, her making that statement screams to me you were handling her right, mind you, I think you hung around too long.


"...out of a alleged abusive LTR of 5 yrs. "
this 'declaration' always makes me smile these days whenever I see or hear it, this is a clear indication of the type of man she gets wet for and she indicates what amount of cr@p she is willing to put up with in order to be rawdogged by such a guy! with abuse there is usually high drama and these women should come with a drip full of drama.
I bet the sex would have been wild and freaky (to bad you missed out) but as its a wrk coleague, you have done the right thing on this occassion.

 

[backbreaker]

i dont' think she's as much crazy as she is just a very attractive girl who has never been put in place beucase guys never put attractive girls in her place. she's never had to grow up and act like an adult beucase guys will put up wtih her becuase she's hawt.




this girl is defcon 2 crazy

 

[NotSoSuave]

She gave me the game plan early on too... I tried to listen as much as I could and decipher it. First thing that caught my attention was the infamous Marilyn Monroe quote, "Selfish, insecure, handle me", she put up on her FB after our first date...

Then she slipped in how:

- She's a great liar
- How she says hurtful things she doesn't mean
- She does things to people and never feels bad about it

This made me real cautious. I kept our contact at work to a minimum and that bothered her. I didn't parade her around, she kept asking why Im not telling everyone Im seeing her... But when I was with her I acted like a normal dude hanging out with a girl he likes. She didnt get that.

I already knew about her messed up background... I really didn't have any expectations going into the whole thing. Maybe that helped me a bit, keeping my feelings in check (even though I messed up) etc etc.

But it was an awesome learning experience and Im thankful in a weird way

 

[drak_ool]

She tells me that I'm fussy, basically dodging all these logical questions.

curious why you try to keep it logical with ANY girl, let alone this crazy chick. The biggest evolution in my game in 2012 was to completely stop trying to be logical with girls. I just keep it aloof, dodge/evade logical questions and explanations, which drives girls crazy but also keeps them coming back for more.

As far as shyt tests, remember that the only way you "win" is by refusing to respond to the test by stay aloof/dodging it. If you either freak out, or respond to her in a logical way, you lost because you basically accepted her power over you to sh.it test you in the first place.

 

[Fatal Jay]

I was thinking the same thing, dude didn't smash this broad so why does he put up with all this bull crap, delete her number and don't look back, now you know why people say never date people on the job, it always end badly.

 

[Fatal Jay]

I liked his quote also, men try to give logical reasons as to why women do the things they do, when females go by emotions not logic, that's why men cant seem to grasp when women flake or just fall off the face of the earth, but never come to think that men don't have power over this, you simply back off, and don't contact the chick, you do anything else and I promise you lose.

 

[NotSoSuave]

I was thinking the same thing, dude didn't smash this broad so why does he put up with all this bull crap, delete her number and don't look back, now you know why people say never date people on the job, it always end badly.

Ur right, I stayed around too long... but got out in time anyway. I havn't looked back as this was 6 months ago... Appreciate ur feedback tho.