I think I give up on this Don Juan stuff...

bigneil

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Yes, GroOver has it right.

Ultimately, we want to date women who we can fall for, meaning who can hurt us. Otherwise we are underachieving. When some of them do inevitably leave us we must use the inspiration (that the pain provides) to both learn new things (like on SS) and to improve physically. That gives us the ability to manage similar women in the future with greater ease.

As pook said, when you get dumped you really dodged a bullet!
 

JohnnyStrabler

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Damn! Some inspiring post in here! I am not even going through the same but I feel inspired!

OP; the wounds will never completely heal. It will just turn into a scar that will remain with you until you die, you will never forget it. She will have a family of her own and be happy WITHOUT you! All Alphas bear the scar of a lost love, hell even James Bond (Vesper)


Edit: search1ng one is never too young lol
 

BPH

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search1ng said:
you're 17 - kind of young to be hating women.
I don't hate women in the least. I just stopped being emotionally-invested in them. I liked women from 1st grade, and I was made fun of because I expressed that interest. That killed my confidence and made me kind of a dweeb until sophomore year of high school.

As a result I find it hard to be sweet and sincere but very easy to be sexual and lustful.
 

bigneil

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We can't control emotions. They are an emergent property. Sadly, being emotional is seen as feminine. But the heart seeks an emotional connection at some level with everyone we interact with.
 

dudewut

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I guess being the playa playa type personality and/or thick skin is kind of innate and not really something you can learn....
 

Darth

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In my opinion, having sex with someone and then expecting not to feel anything when she leaves you is ludicrous. Sex is what married people do- when you are having sex, you are essentially (with your body) saying "We are married." So it doesn't surprise me that you are feeling blue. That's not what the issue is.

The first issue is that I don't think you know what love is. Societal norms be damned, I wouldn't have had sex. And if you do, understand what that means.

The second issue is fundamental: You are thinking like a quitter.

Everybody has feelings. Everyone feels terrible from time to time. But what do you do? How do you bounce back? You mentioned wanting to become a priest. That's great if you feel called by God, but if it's just because you can't get girls, that's a terrible, terrible idea.
 

That_guy

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Darth said:
Everybody has feelings. Everyone feels terrible from time to time. But what do you do? How do you bounce back? You mentioned wanting to become a priest. That's great if you feel called by God, but if it's just because you can't get girls, that's a terrible, terrible idea.
The way I see it; I fell in love, it was lost, therefore it might be a calling? Think about it, dude. Its like I have done this, done that, tried this tried that.
 

Darth

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It may very well be- the fact that this has occurred to you is significant. A friend of mine is going to seminary this May and something similar happened to him. He liked women, but he was considering priesthood too. He was stubborn and was resisting the call. Finally, he found this woman and started dating her- said she was "everything he every wanted" in a woman and then some. They were going for a long time, discussed marriage, etc. Then she ran away for no reason. My friend said as soon as that happened, he finally gave in because he knew he was meant to be a priest. But it wasn't based on an extreme emotion. It was a calm decision.

All I'm saying is, it shouldn't be like "I can't get women so I guess I'll become a priest to get away from it all." It should be "I want something more out of life and I want a stronger relationship with God." There's a big difference.
 

slitherjef

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You know, I often have the same thoughts. I have had pretty much no success, most of the chicks I talk to some how happen to be young, like early 20s for examples, so obviously seeing some on and have a family. I am not very out going. I am pretty much an introvert, a thinker. I used to think perhaps my social skills where stunted, and perhaps the introductions are, but once Im comfortable I start talking, joking and playing and so on. I think often times a more aggressive chick (those are hard to come by as it is) gives me a chance and only later do I realize what happened and its too late. Im usually labeled gay or something.

When I work around an attractive lady I'm interested in, I wait for an excuse to talk to her. Or I hear she is married, or taken or something only to find out a buddy got to "pop her top" so to speak and I'm like, WTF!? i thought she was taken and he's like, so did I?

I don't really socialize or go out or drink or party or anything. Only recently have I realized I do have a small social circle at work forming and perhaps this is the best way for me as the girls that I do manage to talk to are taken (though I am starting to suspect one is perhaps not as taken as it seems, not that she is sleeping around, that I know of, but her demeanor) but what ever. Perhaps this will lead to an "after work party" where their out side of work friends will be there and allow a friend from work to introduce me.

One of my guy friends has pretty much figured out I am having trouble meeting someone. Telling me I just need to get out there. Sure, but its hard to make rapport with a stranger and I don't get out anyway that often.

Yeah, I think about giving up completely on this myself. Especially the speed seduction part. I almost want to take my time getting to know someone, make it a game like chess or Stratego, without the timer. Really hard for me to do when you have 30 seconds to make a move...
 

coochieman

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Don't blame you, you just pussie trippin' man. Until you have fuccked a significant number of it, you still gonna be overwhelmed by it.

Don't get it twisted, you've only stuck d!ck in ONE girl and you think you've had enough orientation to call it quits? [That's like walking into a gym for the first time, lifting a mere 20kg barbell and calling it quits cos you hit your leg on one of 'em machines, or cos the instructor calls you "*****"]

Guess the game isn't for everybody. I respect your decision then.

What? Did you think you were gonna get married to her? Everything ends. Including life.

Your story seems more like "The reason why I think I shouldn't be a soft, wussy a** chump.... And man the fucck up!"

Matter of fact, Yeah Quit.
The less DJs we've got out there, the better it gets for us. Right ?
 
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