perswaysive
New Member
- Joined
- May 27, 2005
- Messages
- 3
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I'm turning 21 this summer, and I never had a girlfriend. I was never romantically involved with anyone, however, I'm not a virgin.
See, I used to be very "timid" and preferred to be alone while attending middle school and high school. People used to invite me to parties or hang out after school, but I preferred being home instead. I know that I missed out on the crucial period of a guy's life to have his first kiss, or first girlfriend, etc.
After graduating high school, my personality completely changed. I'm outgoing and love to be in social situations. It seems after my 18th birthday, I realized being alone all the time was stupid, so I *wanted* someone to invite me to a party, etc.
I have no problems with starting conversations or keeping a conversation interesting. I'm witty and usually crack good jokes. I'm also intelligent and not bad looking. I rate myself a 7.5 on a good day, and 6.5 when I feel like "blah". If I workout (currently on the slim side) and gain some weight, I can possibly become an 8.
Why do I want a girlfriend? The same reason you all have a lady in your life. It feels good to be with the opposite sex. Not just for the sex, but for the companionship. I would like to be able to crash at my girlfriend's place or have her come over. Or instead of going to the movies or amusement parks with guy friends all the time, I want to hold hands with a lady.
So, if I'm intelligent, attractive, witty, and good conversationalist... what's the problem?
The problem is two reasons (in my opinion). Maybe some of you can enlighten me further.
1. I don't interact with females (in my age range) all that much. I like to build rapport with a female (I don't like cold pickups) and since I'm not attending school, and most of my jobs have women out of my age range, I don't have the ability to meet someone that I would want to date. I don't drink nor have I attended any clubs... so those two social gatherings aren't in my scope.
2. If I do meet a girl (this happened three times already in the past month) that I'm remotely interested in... during our conversation, I find out they have a boyfriend. They don't tell me right away, but it slips out. For example, we could be casually talking about movies, and she'll say: "I just saw Romantic Comedy X last weekend and my boyfriend hated it!". They don't rub their boyfriend in my face so I'd leave them alone... If they don't mention their relationship status in our conversation, I'd learn that they're taken from someone else.
So, those are my two main problems. If I could just be in a situation with a single girl, that I'm attracted to, and enough time to build rapport... I'd already have a lady in my life.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I don't want to hear: "you just have to wait... someone will come". I don't want to be a beta male waiting for a girl to choose me... but again, I don't particularly enjoy getting random phone numbers from girls within 5 mins of a conversation. This can't be the only way to get dates... is it?
See, I used to be very "timid" and preferred to be alone while attending middle school and high school. People used to invite me to parties or hang out after school, but I preferred being home instead. I know that I missed out on the crucial period of a guy's life to have his first kiss, or first girlfriend, etc.
After graduating high school, my personality completely changed. I'm outgoing and love to be in social situations. It seems after my 18th birthday, I realized being alone all the time was stupid, so I *wanted* someone to invite me to a party, etc.
I have no problems with starting conversations or keeping a conversation interesting. I'm witty and usually crack good jokes. I'm also intelligent and not bad looking. I rate myself a 7.5 on a good day, and 6.5 when I feel like "blah". If I workout (currently on the slim side) and gain some weight, I can possibly become an 8.
Why do I want a girlfriend? The same reason you all have a lady in your life. It feels good to be with the opposite sex. Not just for the sex, but for the companionship. I would like to be able to crash at my girlfriend's place or have her come over. Or instead of going to the movies or amusement parks with guy friends all the time, I want to hold hands with a lady.
So, if I'm intelligent, attractive, witty, and good conversationalist... what's the problem?
The problem is two reasons (in my opinion). Maybe some of you can enlighten me further.
1. I don't interact with females (in my age range) all that much. I like to build rapport with a female (I don't like cold pickups) and since I'm not attending school, and most of my jobs have women out of my age range, I don't have the ability to meet someone that I would want to date. I don't drink nor have I attended any clubs... so those two social gatherings aren't in my scope.
2. If I do meet a girl (this happened three times already in the past month) that I'm remotely interested in... during our conversation, I find out they have a boyfriend. They don't tell me right away, but it slips out. For example, we could be casually talking about movies, and she'll say: "I just saw Romantic Comedy X last weekend and my boyfriend hated it!". They don't rub their boyfriend in my face so I'd leave them alone... If they don't mention their relationship status in our conversation, I'd learn that they're taken from someone else.
So, those are my two main problems. If I could just be in a situation with a single girl, that I'm attracted to, and enough time to build rapport... I'd already have a lady in my life.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I don't want to hear: "you just have to wait... someone will come". I don't want to be a beta male waiting for a girl to choose me... but again, I don't particularly enjoy getting random phone numbers from girls within 5 mins of a conversation. This can't be the only way to get dates... is it?