I need some serious help, to get her back

Bestie

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I've been in relation with her for almost a year now. Things were awesome at first, we used to talk a lot and there were no disputes involved at all.

However things have been changed now as time passed. Slowly slowly she started doing followings:

1:- Acting rude and b!tchy.
2:- More controlling.
3:- Always fighting with me, and most importantly, stopped giving me time.
4:- Always staying busy.

As a result of all this, i slowly lost control and became a complete super "WUSS".

I always said her sorry, always apologized even when it's not even a 0% fault of me, she kept getting more and more controlling.

Now at last, it reached to a point, we had our last argument and she finally broke up. She said "You never understand my points, you annoy the hell out of me, there are thousand more important things then you in my life"

That's when i again started begging, i kept begging for whole 2 days. Complete 2 days, and then finally ended up getting hyper. I abused her, i even said **** off for ever. She sent me a long reply stating that she never expected those and then went to her own path.

Then she wanted me to recover her lost data from computer (I'm expert of data recovery ^_^) and i did helped her with it, after the work, i again ended up in a complete "WUSS". Begged her to death, told her she is like my oxygen and all the desperate stuff to make her totally convinced that I'm sincere to death with her.

She denied and she said she will not even do friendship with me. I kept convincing and begging. Promised her that i will do what ever she say. At last i even said kill me but don't end up the relationship i can't marry anyone other then you.

Then she stopped giving me answers, this reached to a point that she got hell annoyed and switched her mobile off.

Now after 5-6 hours, i thought i cannot make it up with this women, i have totally made up my mind to move on. Now while searching on google, I found that "No contact" rule. It's awesome.

I just messeg'ed her " You did very bad with me, you could have undertook me, i really wanted to spend my life with you but if you're not at all into the relation then okay bye just take care" - and after that i went NC.

I've shared the whole situation from a to z here. I'm interested to know can the strict 100% "No contact (NC)" work in my situation to at least make her reinitiate - can the no contact make her contact me her self for reconciling the relation?

I'm mixing myself up with as many girls as I possibly can, I'm going to start living my own life.

But I'd still love to see her realize what she have done. Is there any possibility that she contact me after realizing the worth?

I've had my friend exactly in the same situation (Female friend). Her boy friend left her same way and she begged the same way, then went No contact with no intention of ever winning him back. He came back 2 months later begging for forgiveness.

So can such situation also happen in my case? Please help.
 

Mr_Stinky

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Bestie said:
I've been in relation with her for almost a year now. Things were awesome at first, we used to talk a lot and there were no disputes involved at all.

However things have been changed now as time passed. Slowly slowly she started doing followings:

1:- Acting rude and b!tchy.
2:- More controlling.
3:- Always fighting with me, and most importantly, stopped giving me time.
4:- Always staying busy.

As a result of all this, i slowly lost control and became a complete super "WUSS".

I always said her sorry, always apologized even when it's not even a 0% fault of me, she kept getting more and more controlling.

Now at last, it reached to a point, we had our last argument and she finally broke up. She said "You never understand my points, you annoy the hell out of me, there are thousand more important things then you in my life"

That's when i again started begging, i kept begging for whole 2 days. Complete 2 days, and then finally ended up getting hyper. I abused her, i even said **** off for ever. She sent me a long reply stating that she never expected those and then went to her own path.

Then she wanted me to recover her lost data from computer (I'm expert of data recovery ^_^) and i did helped her with it, after the work, i again ended up in a complete "WUSS". Begged her to death, told her she is like my oxygen and all the desperate stuff to make her totally convinced that I'm sincere to death with her.

She denied and she said she will not even do friendship with me. I kept convincing and begging. Promised her that i will do what ever she say. At last i even said kill me but don't end up the relationship i can't marry anyone other then you.

Then she stopped giving me answers, this reached to a point that she got hell annoyed and switched her mobile off.

Now after 5-6 hours, i thought i cannot make it up with this women, i have totally made up my mind to move on. Now while searching on google, I found that "No contact" rule. It's awesome.

I just messeg'ed her " You did very bad with me, you could have undertook me, i really wanted to spend my life with you but if you're not at all into the relation then okay bye just take care" - and after that i went NC.

I've shared the whole situation from a to z here. I'm interested to know can the strict 100% "No contact (NC)" work in my situation to at least make her reinitiate - can the no contact make her contact me her self for reconciling the relation?

I'm mixing myself up with as many girls as I possibly can, I'm going to start living my own life.

But I'd still love to see her realize what she have done. Is there any possibility that she contact me after realizing the worth?

I've had my friend exactly in the same situation (Female friend). Her boy friend left her same way and she begged the same way, then went No contact with no intention of ever winning him back. He came back 2 months later begging for forgiveness.

So can such situation also happen in my case? Please help.
Improve yourself and move on. That's all you can do. If she comes back -- great. If not, you've improved yourself and you've moved on
 

Bestie

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I agree. It's a win win situation. Either she'll come back or either i will move on ;)

However, here I'm interested to know about how much are the chances based on the experience of all user's, my whole situation is in front of you guys, what do you people say, are there any chances that she will come back? Based on how I handled the situation and how I sent her my last message.
 

Skyline

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Bestie said:
I agree. It's a win win situation. Either she'll come back or either i will move on ;)

However, here I'm interested to know about how much are the chances based on the experience of all user's, my whole situation is in front of you guys, what do you people say, are there any chances that she will come back? Based on how I handled the situation and how I sent her my last message.
Considering the fact you went COMPLETE AFC when she left and probably during (which is probably why she dumped you in the first place) the relationship...

I don't think she will.

No contact is supposed to help YOU move on, not "get" her back. Right now, you have ZERO value. Take this as an opportunity to study this site and apply DJ techniques to improve your life and overall well being and find someone better.

Read this:

 

Purefilth

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Bestie said:
I agree. It's a win win situation. Either she'll come back or either i will move on ;)

However, here I'm interested to know about how much are the chances based on the experience of all user's, my whole situation is in front of you guys, what do you people say, are there any chances that she will come back? Based on how I handled the situation and how I sent her my last message.
You can spend minutes, hours, days weeks, or even months over-analysing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could've, would've happened....

or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fvck on.

Learn to respect yourself enough to walk away from ANYTHING that no longer serves you, grows you OR makes you HAPPY.

Remember as you start out - the rules and reasons for NO CONTACT - that means re-read the first page of the thread. many overlook the fact that it is called the "No Contact CHALLENGE" It wont be easy, and it isn't meant to be easy.
I've been through it, and the EX in question in my case is loooong gone and I am better for it.

Good luck.
 

Bestie

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But i ended it up with this message:

I just messeg'ed her " You did very bad with me, you could have undertook me, i really wanted to spend my life with you but if you're not at all into the relation then okay bye just take care" - and after that i went NC.
Then I went No contact, I didn't took the right step? Or should I have said something else in place?
 

Purefilth

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Bestie said:
But i ended it up with this message:



Then I went No contact, I didn't took the right step? Or should I have said something else in place?
re read what I just said:box:
 

VladPatton

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This is lost. You destroyed your own frame in the relationship. Delete her number, emails, EVERYTHING that will keep you from contacting her. Throw out everything she has in your house.

This should be a big lesson for you: You should always, always be ready to let go of a woman in life. Nothing you say or do will get her to stay. Every word you cry out will only weaken your life and give her full power over you. It's the truth and it happens all the time. Don't be that guy. I hope you take our advice and move on.

Also note, that your relationship ended long before she began to change her attitude towards you.

Good luck.
 

Dance

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Constantly saying sorry, letting her disrespect the fvck out of you, begging her, telling her she is everything to you.

Doing favours for her after she dumped you. Tsk tsk.

Oh my where do we begin.

Can't tell if this is a troll post, because have pretty much gone against every bit of advice available on these kinds of websites.

She is gone now, and it is your fault, should never have let any of these happen.

My advice like everyone elses is stop all CONTACT and stop all POSSIBILITIES OF CONTACT. Delete her number, block her on facebook, not delete, BLOCK! Unfollow off instagram, block off snapchat, whatever else you may use. I'm sure you're smart enough to get the point.

You are the great catch, any woman should be lucky to have you if you are Don Juan, don't vomit your emotions in her face, and don't wuss out. If she steps out of line, punish her.
 

adam225

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Focus on improving yourself to your best ability. No matter what you think YOU DO NOT NEED HER. True happiness is found INTERNALLY; NOT EXTERNALLY. If you really want the last laugh wait for her to come crawling back; get back with her; screw her up the a$$, then dump her.... Simple...
 

JohnChops

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I don' think this is a troll, just a legit person looking for some help. All I can say is just stay no contact, stay strong, ignore all texts. She WILL (i guarantee it) attempt to text/call/email you in a couple weeks (ill give it 2) just to see if she could use you for an ego boost after the fire has gone out.

Dont give it to her.

Move on, find new women, improve yourself (Gym, hobbies,etc) and go have some fun! Its all in your mind. If you think about her, youll lose it and break down and end up ruining that NC you built up with her. IF you keep your mind busy with other things, then you end up creating self worth for yourself and finally become happy you will slowly forget about her. She will drift off in your head. Mindset is KEY. If you think you love her, you do. If you think she did you wrong, is a worthelss peice of sh1t , then SHE IS!

Good luck.
 

MikeOck

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So you really want to get back with a rude, *****y, controlling woman who constantly fought with you, never had time for you and told you straight up that you were the absolute lowest priority in her life?

No, you don't. You know you don't want that. What you are experiencing is a damaged ego. You let this woman define your self worth and when she left, she took it with her. Fortunately, she can't give you back something that she never held in the first place. You define your value. You can have it back anytime you want, all you have to do is realize that you've had it all along.

Let this woman go. You can't find the right woman while you are still hung up on the wrong one. She did you a favor. Don't ever take her back, you deserve more, start demanding it and never accept less. Treat yourself as a man of value and others will follow your lead.
 

JohnChops

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MikeOck said:
So you really want to get back with a rude, *****y, controlling woman who constantly fought with you, never had time for you and told you straight up that you were the absolute lowest priority in her life?

No, you don't. You know you don't want that. What you are experiencing is a damaged ego. You let this woman define your self worth and when she left, she took it with her. Fortunately, she can't give you back something that she never held in the first place. You define your value. You can have it back anytime you want, all you have to do is realize that you've had it all along.

Let this woman go. You can't find the right woman while you are still hung up on the wrong one. She did you a favor. Don't ever take her back, you deserve more, start demanding it and never accept less. Treat yourself as a man of value and others will follow your lead.
rep for you :cheer: good information for anyone in this situation
 

Bestie

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Thanks for all your advises, well looks like moving on is the way to go now.

Anyway's here's an update. She texted me. She said this in her text that she is sorry for the last thing which happened, but i was being very much annoying all the time texting her and all. She is ready to reconcile.

Should i go for her words? And then I'll not pay her much attention, it may spark the interest somehow and I may get the power back. What do you guys say.
 

adam225

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Bestie said:
Thanks for all your advises, well looks like moving on is the way to go now.

Anyway's here's an update. She texted me. She said this in her text that she is sorry for the last thing which happened, but i was being very much annoying all the time texting her and all. She is ready to reconcile.

Should i go for her words? And then I'll not pay her much attention, it may spark the interest somehow and I may get the power back. What do you guys say.
NO

You are too good for her. Find someone who truly appreciates you.
 

Kailex

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Bestie said:
Thanks for all your advises, well looks like moving on is the way to go now.

Anyway's here's an update. She texted me. She said this in her text that she is sorry for the last thing which happened, but i was being very much annoying all the time texting her and all. She is ready to reconcile.

Should i go for her words? And then I'll not pay her much attention, it may spark the interest somehow and I may get the power back. What do you guys say.

Brother, MOVE ON.
This woman sounds like a horrible person and you are trying to regain a frame that you've absolutely shattered.

The way to get power back over your OWN life is to delete her number, stop talking to her, and start over... clean slate. But if you keep subjecting yourself to this personal form of torture... it's all on YOU and no one else.
 

Big Nuts

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She says you're annoying and she wants to reconcile???.....boy, that's LOVE!
 

Night-hawk

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Forget trying to get girls back. **** that noise. I've been there and I know the whole afc explosion scenario, and most likely you feel ashamed and want her back to regain that validation from her. Understandable. First, you need to toughen the **** up and regain your stance with her. Take back your composure and show her that rough masculine side again. This may be gained by no contact, or by stopping any appeasement with her, or by saying NO, nope, nuh uh, notta. Fancy that, you are aloud to say no and stop hearing her crap and even better you are aloud to say no and stop hearing the crap you are telling yourself. Just learn from it and grow, toughen up and that will be better then gettin her back and not having learnt anything and having the same **** patterns repeat. Get back to feeling that enthusiasm you felt when single and unattatched to her. Get busy with other priorities.
 

Bestie

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Hmm, thanks all of you for your help. Yeah i agree it's too late to forgive the b!tch. Denied her request, removed her number and already in contact with 3-4 close friend's (Female). Not a big deal to move on.
 
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