I may be in the minority here...

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by sAxyguy83
Am I the only one on this forum that still believes in Man's innate capability for good?

The problem lies not in the fact that there AREN'T any good people out there, it's that those good people don't walk around with it stamped on their foreheads.

There might be a girl out there who, after getting involved in a relationship with you would refrain from cheating, never fall out of love with you, basically be everything you are looking for until the day you die. The problem is that YOU NEVER KNOW WHO THIS PERSON IS. Once you put faith in a few that you think would NEVER do you wrong, you'll see how the world really is. You'll see that despite your best effort MOST of the timne the situaion will turn out to be less than ideal, leaving you holding the bag.

Remember, she doesn't like you, she likes what you do for her.

One day you'll see where I'm coming from.

 

[BGMan]

Usually I'm not with the majority, but this time I am.

However, what I mean by the "L-word" does NOT mean to constantly tell the girl you L-word her, or to stick to her like ivy around a lamppost. In fact, I believe in using the L-word as sparingly as possible.

I like that statement, "If I could combine the two (sex and L-word) it would kick royal ass". You got that right.

BGMan

 

[sAxyguy83]

I agree with Bonhomme. 3 is definitely more optimistic, and that's probably one of the reasons it's so popular.

Y'know, str8up, I think we're getting pretty close to a consensus here. We both agree that there are a lot of ppl out there that seem to have tragically been born lacking a brain and/or conscience and/or heart. We both agree that there are those precious few people out there that are kind, caring, and intelligent. I'm betting our different experiences with women are due, at least in part, to our approaches.

Despite having read these forums for 2+ years, I still have a bit of the old AFC in me. That's probably how I ended up in a LTR (18-month mark coming up real soon) with a good friend. While this is a VERY dangerous thing to do (I've seen what a relationship between friends can do to friendships), it can also hold a lot of potential. Knowing someone for 6 months before you start into a relationship helps you get to know them very well.

Basically, if someone's looking for a physical relationship or a quick lay, don't even think about going after your female friends. But, if you're looking for someone for a meaningful LTR, there are definite benefits to getting to know her first. Of course, this is also about the riskiest method I can think of. I have experienced either first-hand or close second-hand many of the problems of this method, including the fact that the girl can get scooped away by someone that moves faster, and the risk I mentioned above (When two of my friends, who were dating, broke up, their breakup split a couple of very close friendships).

I honestly don't know what the best method is. Everyone should decide for themself what they want from a relationship and how best to approach that.

 

[Deep Dish]

I just want to say that despite my comments, I still had voted #3, which is no contradiction. I wrote my consciousness, I voted my heart.

Despite having read these forums for 2+ years, I still have a bit of the old AFC in me.

And there's nothing wrong with that. You will never entirely get rid of it, nor should you try. It's that part of you which allows bliss.

Basically, if someone's looking for a physical relationship or a quick lay, don't even think about going after your female friends. But, if you're looking for someone for a meaningful LTR, there are definite benefits to getting to know her first.

I have stumbled upon a masterful 'game plan' which works for me and is great for both. I won't go into detail, at least not without request, but it basically involves having lots of female friends.

 

[MetalFortress]

Originally posted by Deep Dish
I won't go into detail, at least not without request, but it basically involves having lots of female friends.

I'd be interested to hear.

 

[Deep Dish]

The following is working for me in a workplace environment, and oddly also seems to affect me elsewhere (I think because of the mindset involved):

Make many female friends, build a whole social network. Whenever possible, make every woman who rejects you (or is unavailable) into a friend. When you meet a chick, don't think "I'm gonna seduce her", but rather "She'll make a good FRIEND." Be genuine about it. Behind every woman are at least ten friends, and hot chicks have hot friends.

There's no harm in being friends with a woman. If she wants you, she'll want to go from friends to lovers. By having many female friends, you will also not be dependent on whether you get any particular one.

And sometimes the girls say some pretty weird stuff.

By having many female friends, when a new girl comes in she sees how the girls are so comfortable around you, and you're likewise, consequently you instantly break down a huge barrier, even if you've not said a word to her. What you want out of the girl, if anything, dictates how to proceed.

A few months ago I began this strategy with zero female friends in my life, and right now things are going great. It's a gift that will keep on giving.

 

[sAxyguy83]

Sounds like a good strategy. The one thing to be careful of is that you don't treat female friends too differently from male friends, or they'll get a tad suspicious...

 

[sAxyguy83]

BUMP...

Damn . . . I should've kept arguing with STR8UP. I hate how threads tend to die when the arguments end.

 

[Chaos-Knight]

hahaha

I choose #1
sex sex and more sex!
(at least Im not in denial )

I agree with the #1 people,
Reality is cruel - make lemonade!

I believe that when I find a girl that
actually is worthy and that returns 50-50
with a functional brain,and is a good Lay
then maybe love,but by ACTIONS not by the "L" word.

And if you don't keep looking you might miss the BBD
(bigger better deal)

I want to enjoy my life to the fullest
and I DO NOT need a LTR to be happy!
FB's are more convenient and low-maintenance.
plus you never really cheat cause NOONE owns you...
hahahahahaha (evil laugh)

Don't hate the players = Hate the game!