I suspect you guys are going to slam me for what I did here and how I acted. If you cannot tell my self confidence is lower than it should be.
I meet this girl in a club, well kind of she fell over drunk and I picked her up and sat her down. I was attracted to her I think her body type mainly. I wanted to hook up with her that night but she was too wasted and with a friend and this isn’t even the point of the story. Anyway we end up talking on the phone, texting, and we meet again at the club it is kind of a date now. We end up seeing each other a lot and we were not seeing anyone else but we did not call each other boyfriend and girlfriend. At one point she asked me to be sure to let her know if I sleep with any other women because it impacts her. We were basically exclusive.
So she has a lot of draws or cons and so do I. She has two children living at home which I am fine with I like her kids and got along great with them. But for her it is kind of a tie down for her to go out. She did not feel like I treated her right in the relationship but I gave it my all, I am broke right now with this economy and going through some very tough times. I basically did not spend a single dime on her; she did spend some on me but not too much at all. I would try to help her out if she was running late for example I would take her child to daycare before I went to work just do the small things but I do feel that I showed I cared.
She knew I wanted to go out sometimes with her. Well instead of going out with me she goes out with her friends. I made an issue of it and she does it the next weekend, I am thinking she is trying to get me to dump her or actually she convinced me that it is just her way. She did a few over the top things for me in helping me with my work that I did not ask her to do but it took a lot of time and it was her way of showing me how much she cared, I think she thought she was giving this relationship her all in the way she knew how.
So I used her laptop a lot when I was over there and noticed she was on several online dating sites. They came up in browser history and what not I am an IT guy I know a lot about this. I didn’t say anything at first. Several days or weeks later I bring it up to her in casual conversation that I noticed it. This one dating site I also had a profile on from over a year ago and it shows you if the other person logged on today or not. She was logging on every single day without fail. I called her out on it and put pressure on her for a better explanation as her explanation was she was bored.
Shortly after I put the pressure on her she dumps me and puts me on friend status. I did not accept this basically you are going to be a booty call for me now, or maybe later, or we have a chance of being more later on when we are both in a better place but I did not see us being just friends that’s it. Well as a friend she chatted me up a lot asking advice all sorts of stuff she even left her job and is going through some crazy times.
So I get some evidence that suggests she is looking for local guys. She agreed with me that when she was ready to date we would talk. At this point I didn’t even want to date her but my self esteem was crushed because I wanted to know what I was lacking. I wanted to improve myself plus there were a lot of things that happened which I brought to her attention she said I was paranoid and I kind of wanted to know if I was or if I were actually correct?
Okay so after this long post here is what I did and there was a lot that led up to me coming up with this. I created a myspace profile of a guy that I thought she might be attracted to. All I was thinking was I wanted to see the tone of the conversation if she even accepted him as a friend and talked to him. Did not think it would really lead anywhere at all! She is far too careful for that I thought.
I create the profile give him one picture and no friends, send her a friend invite. She accepts and as soon as she accepts she suggests we should hang out. A day later I reply and have a little message with her. The next day we are in an IM and she invited me over for steamy sex right now, well invited him over. Of course I postponed the meeting.
That night I sent her an email saying that it was good to be her friend but I removed her from everything. Myspace, facebook, removed her I did not want to talk with her but I was very nice in my mail. She sends me an email as me of course saying she thought about inviting me over for sex, we started chatting. Okay when I was chatting with her as this guy she slammed the real me in several ways. When I was chatting with her she was making a big deal about being honest and all and she is so honest and I am thinking to myself, you know maybe she is. There were a lot of things I suspected but could not put my finger on but my gut told me there was something more there.
Anyway she outright lied to me about several things, I know because I have his IM. She denied inviting anyone over like that. She had me thinking before that she was keeping to herself and being depressed and not messing around or dating anyone but when she was ready she would call me. I then tell her that this guy told me about their conversation, she backpedals hard. She reacted in a way I have not seen before. I show her the proof she takes a long break comes back and figures out of course the guy was me. I admit it then we confess everything to each other kind of. She makes me out to be the bad guy because I played games with her mind, I felt that is what she had been doing to me the whole time.
Then after all of this I find out because she tells me that the guy I pulled her aside about one day because of their interactions and she told me it was nothing, they have been having mad sex since we broke up. She claims not before then but I have my doubts.
Sorry for typos…guys I am single now. We are totally done with each other for sure. I feel better now to some extend that my guy instincts on many more things than I put in here were correct I am amazed that she invited this stranger over the Internet over for sex giving her real address and phone number and willing to do it with her two kids in the next room. I do not feel bad about what I did. It may seem obsessive and I guess it is perhaps I have those tendencies.
Question guys…was I wrong in putting that profile up and talking to her under that?
I meet this girl in a club, well kind of she fell over drunk and I picked her up and sat her down. I was attracted to her I think her body type mainly. I wanted to hook up with her that night but she was too wasted and with a friend and this isn’t even the point of the story. Anyway we end up talking on the phone, texting, and we meet again at the club it is kind of a date now. We end up seeing each other a lot and we were not seeing anyone else but we did not call each other boyfriend and girlfriend. At one point she asked me to be sure to let her know if I sleep with any other women because it impacts her. We were basically exclusive.
So she has a lot of draws or cons and so do I. She has two children living at home which I am fine with I like her kids and got along great with them. But for her it is kind of a tie down for her to go out. She did not feel like I treated her right in the relationship but I gave it my all, I am broke right now with this economy and going through some very tough times. I basically did not spend a single dime on her; she did spend some on me but not too much at all. I would try to help her out if she was running late for example I would take her child to daycare before I went to work just do the small things but I do feel that I showed I cared.
She knew I wanted to go out sometimes with her. Well instead of going out with me she goes out with her friends. I made an issue of it and she does it the next weekend, I am thinking she is trying to get me to dump her or actually she convinced me that it is just her way. She did a few over the top things for me in helping me with my work that I did not ask her to do but it took a lot of time and it was her way of showing me how much she cared, I think she thought she was giving this relationship her all in the way she knew how.
So I used her laptop a lot when I was over there and noticed she was on several online dating sites. They came up in browser history and what not I am an IT guy I know a lot about this. I didn’t say anything at first. Several days or weeks later I bring it up to her in casual conversation that I noticed it. This one dating site I also had a profile on from over a year ago and it shows you if the other person logged on today or not. She was logging on every single day without fail. I called her out on it and put pressure on her for a better explanation as her explanation was she was bored.
Shortly after I put the pressure on her she dumps me and puts me on friend status. I did not accept this basically you are going to be a booty call for me now, or maybe later, or we have a chance of being more later on when we are both in a better place but I did not see us being just friends that’s it. Well as a friend she chatted me up a lot asking advice all sorts of stuff she even left her job and is going through some crazy times.
So I get some evidence that suggests she is looking for local guys. She agreed with me that when she was ready to date we would talk. At this point I didn’t even want to date her but my self esteem was crushed because I wanted to know what I was lacking. I wanted to improve myself plus there were a lot of things that happened which I brought to her attention she said I was paranoid and I kind of wanted to know if I was or if I were actually correct?
Okay so after this long post here is what I did and there was a lot that led up to me coming up with this. I created a myspace profile of a guy that I thought she might be attracted to. All I was thinking was I wanted to see the tone of the conversation if she even accepted him as a friend and talked to him. Did not think it would really lead anywhere at all! She is far too careful for that I thought.
I create the profile give him one picture and no friends, send her a friend invite. She accepts and as soon as she accepts she suggests we should hang out. A day later I reply and have a little message with her. The next day we are in an IM and she invited me over for steamy sex right now, well invited him over. Of course I postponed the meeting.
That night I sent her an email saying that it was good to be her friend but I removed her from everything. Myspace, facebook, removed her I did not want to talk with her but I was very nice in my mail. She sends me an email as me of course saying she thought about inviting me over for sex, we started chatting. Okay when I was chatting with her as this guy she slammed the real me in several ways. When I was chatting with her she was making a big deal about being honest and all and she is so honest and I am thinking to myself, you know maybe she is. There were a lot of things I suspected but could not put my finger on but my gut told me there was something more there.
Anyway she outright lied to me about several things, I know because I have his IM. She denied inviting anyone over like that. She had me thinking before that she was keeping to herself and being depressed and not messing around or dating anyone but when she was ready she would call me. I then tell her that this guy told me about their conversation, she backpedals hard. She reacted in a way I have not seen before. I show her the proof she takes a long break comes back and figures out of course the guy was me. I admit it then we confess everything to each other kind of. She makes me out to be the bad guy because I played games with her mind, I felt that is what she had been doing to me the whole time.
Then after all of this I find out because she tells me that the guy I pulled her aside about one day because of their interactions and she told me it was nothing, they have been having mad sex since we broke up. She claims not before then but I have my doubts.
Sorry for typos…guys I am single now. We are totally done with each other for sure. I feel better now to some extend that my guy instincts on many more things than I put in here were correct I am amazed that she invited this stranger over the Internet over for sex giving her real address and phone number and willing to do it with her two kids in the next room. I do not feel bad about what I did. It may seem obsessive and I guess it is perhaps I have those tendencies.
Question guys…was I wrong in putting that profile up and talking to her under that?
