I let a girl spend the night, now she wants to all the time!

Robert28

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I've gone on 6 dates with this girl so far. I made the mistake of letting her spend the night this past weekend and now she wants to spend the night every time we hangout! I know I made a huge mistake by doing this but at the time I figured "it's 1:30 am, I aint gonna make her drive home, she can stay" What I failed to realize is this opened a door that I didn't want the be open and now she pretty much expects to spend the night every time we hangout. I've tried the "I need to get up early for work" excuse and she claims she won't mind waking up early and leaving when I have to go to work. son of a b!tch!haha She works weird hours because she's a pharmacist (12-7 and stuff like that). How do I get her to go home sometimes without her getting all pissed and saying "oh, I see how it is, you don't want me to spend the night, just hit it and me go home!".lol She's already leaving sh!t behind at my house. I gotta figure something out before she moves in.haha It was going pretty slow and smooth between us but now I think that one little move on my part has kicked things into high gear.
 

Bingo-Player

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i had a chick like this in the summer

fortunately i caught it just in time and nipped it in the bud

my advice here would be too suddenly realise you need to go away on work for a fortnight you don't want to but the boss is threatening you with your job

2 weeks should be long enough to reset the standard and then make it perfectly clear she can only stay over 1 night a week or however much you want her to stay over
 

Robert28

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Bingo-Player said:
i had a chick like this in the summer

fortunately i caught it just in time and nipped it in the bud

my advice here would be too suddenly realise you need to go away on work for a fortnight you don't want to but the boss is threatening you with your job

2 weeks should be long enough to reset the standard and then make it perfectly clear she can only stay over 1 night a week or however much you want her to stay over
The problem is I am the boss.lol I own my own business and she already knows that. She did say that if I ever needed "me time" to just say so but we all know that's a trap. I got her to go home last night but we are hanging out Thursday and she's already hinted about spending the night. That's what I get for giving her great sex, now she won't leave me alone! She isn't clingy like texting or calling all the time(thank God!) but I have picked up on her wanting to hangout more and more and more.
 

VladPatton

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If she's not nutso or clingy, and a cool chick, just roll with it, man. A lot of guys here would kill for that racket.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

SmooveMooves

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Fūcking tell her that your prefer sleeping in your bed alone.

I don't understand the big deal. If she feels some type of way or gets angry, so be it, she'll get over it eventually

You're a man. You say, do, have what you want.

She's certainly not gonna leave you for it, and if she does, she wasn't worth the trouble if she can't respect what YOU want.

You shouldn't be worried if she does anyway.

Outcome independence.

Too many men are concerned with what she wants, what about what YOU. Is sleeping in your own bed to much to ask?

And chances are it isn't gonna do anything but give her the emotional high she craves, making her chase even harder.

She'll be thinking:

'Why can't I spend the night?
'Am I not good enough?'
'What can I do to be good enough to spend the night'
'He's an ******* for kicking me out.....but...
'Does he do this with all girls?'

Men need to stop walking on eggshells in regards to women. If you don't like something, say you don't!

If you're scared, goto church.
 

El Payaso

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Tell her straight up. "Hey, you won't be sleeping over tonight." Simple. Don't even beat around the bush. If she asks for a reason, look her dead in the eye and give her a strong glare. Then continue whatever you were doing. She will cower and stop the line of questioning. Trust me, it will only make her attraction for you go stronger because you're not afraid to draw your lines in the sand.

Therefore, anytime you do let her sleep over, it will feel special to her. You will be free to let her sleepover at your own time, pace and convenience.
 

skinnyguy

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Just tell her that another girl is spending the night with you. That should take care of it pretty quickly.
 

MOTU

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OP, put her to work when she stays. I have my GF change the sheets and make me breakfast when she stays. It's a good deal to me!
 

Meisterman

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Try going over to her place once or twice a week. Then you can easily leave that night and say you gotta get up for work without making things awkward.
 

Greasy Pig

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I think Meisterman is on the money. Just flip the tables: bust a nut and then leave after 30 minutes of pillow talk so as not to make her feel like a complete slvt.
 

bukowski_merit

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I don't mind women staying with me, so I don't really have this problem.

But I've had women tell me they like sleeping alone, or they prefer to sleep in their own bed, etc.... I've never been offended by it execept for once when the woman waited until I was drunk to tell me (i slept on her couch and never talked to her again). So that would be the way I go.

"I prefer to sleep alone."

You really should have done that from the beginning and made it clear that that one late night was the exception. Now that you've let more nights go by with sleepovers - there's not a lot you can do to push it over smoothly.

You're going to have to cause some ripples. And you're going to have to be okay with the ripples...

In most cases - the ripples actually cause more good than bad.

Tension is rarely a bad thing.

Be ok with her getting p!ssed. Be ok with her saying something like "oh you just want me for sex."

Be ok with anger..... In most cases - she'll just want you more.

But, you better believe she's going to test you just about every freaking night on this now.....
 
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