I just had (yet another) epiphany

[Duffdog]

Backbreaker,

while you claim that being into horse racing is "interesting" and all that, it really can be filed under "being rich". Additionally, I am surprised that you just figured this out...

Do you have any idea how expensive equestrian sports are? Women like horses for one reason--- ITS EXPENSIVE. Women like anything that is expensive. You have taken this one step further and called it "interesting", but in reality, every possible "interesting" thing that a male can do which attracts a HOT female requires enormous amounts of money.

Even philosophy...which girls love, requires that the male has enough extra money available to sit and philosophize instead of working. Name a sport, activity or other avenue of interest to women which doesn't revolve solely on money with absolutely no exceptions at any time and I will eat my hat. Anything that girls like (including having big muscles) requires that the male have enough extra resources available to pursue his "passion". And this is not to say that average guys don't "get lucky", they do, all the time. But, its nearly impossible for an average guy to KEEP a hot girl for any length of time unless he is suddenly above average somehow.

You will find hot girls at every event that is exclusive due to money everywhere in the world. There are no exceptions to this rule that I have found. Even benign things like Politics are not an exception. Girls like politics because politicians are corrupt and extract huge sums of money from corporations, benefactors etc. and can control large amounts of natural resources.

I find it interesting that you believe that this attractive girl who is with this chump at the track is actually devoted to him at all. She may put forth all types of "words" which tell YOU that she is crazy about her husband, but if he is really that much of an AFC, you should have no problem getting her to blow you after a race or two...unless...you truly don't compare to him because you do not have the resources (money) to do so. I guarantee that every hot girl you have ever met will ditch whichever "boyfriend" she is with and sleep with a rich guy unless she truly believes that the guy she is with is going to go somewhere with his life. In other words, if she can't do better than her current deal. If she can...she will be out of there, its only a matter of time.

 

[backbreaker]

Backbreaker,

while you claim that being into horse racing is "interesting" and all that, it really can be filed under "being rich". Additionally, I am surprised that you just figured this out...

Do you have any idea how expensive equestrian sports are? Women like horses for one reason--- ITS EXPENSIVE. Women like anything that is expensive. You have taken this one step further and called it "interesting", but in reality, every possible "interesting" thing that a male can do which attracts a HOT female requires enormous amounts of money.

Even philosophy...which girls love, requires that the male has enough extra money available to sit and philosophize instead of working. Name a sport, activity or other avenue of interest to women which doesn't revolve solely on money with absolutely no exceptions at any time and I will eat my hat. Anything that girls like (including having big muscles) requires that the male have enough extra resources available to pursue his "passion". And this is not to say that average guys don't "get lucky", they do, all the time. But, its nearly impossible for an average guy to KEEP a hot girl for any length of time unless he is suddenly above average somehow.

You will find hot girls at every event that is exclusive due to money everywhere in the world. There are no exceptions to this rule that I have found. Even benign things like Politics are not an exception. Girls like politics because politicians are corrupt and extract huge sums of money from corporations, benefactors etc. and can control large amounts of natural resources.

I find it interesting that you believe that this attractive girl who is with this chump at the track is actually devoted to him at all. She may put forth all types of "words" which tell YOU that she is crazy about her husband, but if he is really that much of an AFC, you should have no problem getting her to blow you after a race or two...unless...you truly don't compare to him because you do not have the resources (money) to do so. I guarantee that every hot girl you have ever met will ditch whichever "boyfriend" she is with and sleep with a rich guy unless she truly believes that the guy she is with is going to go somewhere with his life. In other words, if she can't do better than her current deal. If she can...she will be out of there, its only a matter of time.

this is the difference between theorizing and living life

you are wrong. just leave my post at that. don't have the time this morning

 

[backbreaker]

I think what Fair Shake was trying to say is that horse racing is a niche interest.

But girls do love horses, who knows why. We've all heard about little girls wanting a pony for their birthday, they've got their My Little Pony toys and such. The girls whose parents really did get them horses tended to be more wealthy, and/or live out in the country. So they may well be a better grade of woman, like Backbreaker says.

I think the reason more women than men like horses is that they don't have testicles. I had a girlfriend who had a horse who let me ride it and I found it a bit uncomfortable.

one of the biggest myths is that you have to be uber rich to have a horse. horses aren't THAT expensive. I mean it's one hting if you are into show jumping and you need a world class horse to be able to go with you, but you can usually actually get a horse for free off the race track once they are retired. it's the upkeep that will kill you. my wife has a retired race horse, that she just rides from time to time on trails and stuff. all in all, it's about 800 a month between the stall that he's kept at and the feed bill, not including the vet bill which isn't all that much. about the price of a really really good private school for someone who just likes horses. most girls that work at the track or you see out on the track are just regular ass middle class girls who love horses. I watch HRTV pretty much everyday, and they have what.... 4 female hosts...one like my wife grew up on a farm, one is professional handcaippers daughter, one is the daughter of a pac 10 basketball official, and one ;grew up in freaking minnesota, and would just go to the track on the weekend to see horses, then went to school to be a trainer, and became a trainer, then got into TV. None of the 4 are anything remotely close to being rich, and one of the 4 is one of the trainers wife i was referring to that is stunningly gorgeous.



i've dated a few girls who had horses growing up and none of them were what you would call rich. not poor by any stretch but not rich. generally when the girl gets that bug and gives the dad the eyes, they will find a way to make it work lol.

I think the reason more women than men like horses is that they don't have testicles.

actually they do have testicles lol. A horse with his testicals in tact is called in fact a horse / stallion.By defintion when someoen says "horse "they are reffering to a male horse over the age of 4 with his nuts in tact. A horse that has no testicals is called a gelding and a horse with a testical that is undecended is called a ridgeling



and this isn't necessarily about horse racing, I saw the same thing in AA which like horse racing is somewaht of a community within itself. what some guys may lack in quality of other things, they make up for their zeal in the AA community. this is just another "trait" to a woman if that makes any sense.

there is this phenonomn in AA called 13th stepping, which basically means, guys who have been around the block and in AA for a while,. basically "praying" on the new comers. some of these newcomers are smoking hot. they just have issues. I have seen, way too many times, girls who outside of the rooms of AA would not give a guy the time of day, basically fall head over heels/sleep with a guy who outside of AA you wouldn't look at twice walking down the street.

The girls that catch on, and really get into, get drawn to the dedicated, zealful male AA members, alot of times, depsite their looks (assuming they aren't just repulsive). It's the exact same philosophy as the horse racing analogy.

So they may well be a better grade of woman, like Backbreaker says.

I'll say this and I really really have to go lol.

I'm starting to believe more and more everyday there is no such thing as grades of women. I mean, there are women who are more prone to do ****ed up things, but there is no standard of women that, once you hit this, she is always going to fvck you 4 times a week, never going to cheat, etc. there are women you click with and women you dont' click with.

the reason my wife and I click the way we do is because we do click and are on the same wavelength about what makes us personally tick. But, what if i hated horse racing, and she cheated on me with some guy who was like me right now, would that make her a ****ty person? IMHO not really.

at the end of the day, people are always going to go with what they feel are their most viable options. we can rationalize it, damn them, do whatever, but that's the truth.

i visit various forums from time to time. there was this horse racing forum that i used to visit that i no longer vist that had this off topic forum. there was a chick who is quite cute, not hot or antyhing but she's hittable, wouldn't know me from the avg joe down the street. she LOVES music. like her life is horse racing and music, that's it. lol actually alot like me. but she likes rock music, kinda emo ish chick. Anyway, I remember one day she posted this link to this band that she liked, and i was bored and said what the hell let me listen to one song, and i did and they liked, weren't horrible. and i said you know what this is pretty decent stuff. **** that's all it took. then she started sending me pm's of new songs and pictures of her at shows and **** and asking me what kinda music i liked, etc. she thought she had a connection with someone. might not even have been attraction,t hat's beside the point. the point is, people... women, want are very emotional. they want to feel lik ethey "get" someone, like someone "gets" them, like they "connect" with someone. connection is very easy to do when you are talking about something you actually do like and are passionate about.

I actually use the same epiphany when i was selling ****. I found out a long time ago, that 7 out of 10 time, the person who is actually the most qualified, or who sales the product you most need, won't get the sale.; yes you have the guy who goes on line looking for a car and does 6 months of research and comes in and knows exactly what he wants, but the avg person buying anything worth a damn, rather it be a website or a car, will buy from the person who feels understands them and their needs the best. When selling websites to start up busnesses, i would sale jobs by showing all the ecommerce sites we've built and it was quite a lot. But when I started talking to clients about how I used to own/run an online computer company and the ups and downs, the pitfalls, etc, clients couldn't write checks fast enough.

selling, the art of selling is something that I have always been facaniated by.. mainly because i can sale a vibrator to a nun if i had to, but because of the very human nature of people. learning what makes people tick, how i can do one thing and they do another, etc.

 

[Nutz]

You want to meet hot women who are really interested in you? You tired of meeting attention sluts and run of the mill women who have nothing interesting?


I you are having trouble meeting interesting women who aren't attention *****s or crazy, it's because you don't have an interesting enough life.

I did not say rich, I said interesting. If your idea of a "life" is going to work, coming home, going to the bar on Thursday and friday, lol, guess what the hell you are going to meet?

you can draw a direct line between how unique/interesting your hobbies are and how passionate you are about them, the things you do outside of work, or hell in some cases your work i your work is your passion like me, and the quality of women you get.


Not only does unique hobbies, whatever it is for you, automatically weed out useless run of the mill women, not only does it give you an "in", but once they see you are passionate about the same thing that they are, bam, instant attraction.

I met my now wife at the horse track of all places. she had seen me there, or we saw each ohter for like 2 weeks befrore i approached her. it was a build up type thing. at that point, not very much needed to be said. she saw me checking her out. i caught her glancing at me, I was freaking there everyday it's not like I might or might not like racing.

imagine a first date chalk full of talking about your fav hobby with someone who who shares that same hobby. that's much 10x better than the normal "so what do yo like to do for fun" questions that you get on regular dates

This is weak advice, not because there's no truth to it, but because it lacks any meaning to the individual. Where's the road-map to develop hobbies? Where's the recommendations on where to go to learn about them? How does one interact with women they'll meet at these mystery hobby events? In short, this is no different than telling someone to "be confident" or "be yourself". Now it's "be confident, just be yourself, having interesting hobbies!"

 

[zekko]

one of the biggest myths is that you have to be uber rich to have a horse. horses aren't THAT expensive.

When I said "more wealthy" that may have been a poor choice of words. But to afford to give a horse to your daughter (or afford the upkeep or whatever), you have to have more money than your average working class family. Or else live out in the country. Some families in the country keep horses for city folk, at a cost.

Hobbies in general tend to cost money. Obviously some are more expensive than others.

actually they do have testicles lol. A horse with his testicals in tact is called in fact a horse / stallion.

Lol, I meant the women don't have testicles, not the horse. My point was when I rode a horse, my testicles didn't much care for all the bouncing in the saddle. I suppose you get used to it, I haven't ridden much. Or perhaps my technique was sh!t.

I'm starting to believe more and more everyday there is no such thing as grades of women. I mean, there are women who are more prone to do ****ed up things, but there is no standard of women that, once you hit this, she is always going to fvck you 4 times a week, never going to cheat, etc. there are women you click with and women you dont' click with.

I agree that women will try to find the best deal they can get for their dating value. I don't think there's anything wrong with that though, why shouldn't they? Guys do this too, though probably not to the same extent girls do. And of course they define value a lot differently than women.

The classic case is a girl marries a guy with a good job. Then he becomes unemployed, and she leaves him. But isn't this similar to all the guys here who say they will drop their girls if she gains 20 pounds? The difference is men will generally take their vows more seriously.

Anyway, I definitely do think there is at least a lower grade of woman. A type of women you should definitely not try to domesticate. Don't make a ho a housewife, as they say. I also can't discount the value of a good upbringing. It doesn't guarantee the girl will turn out well, but it can help.

 

[backbreaker]

When I said "more wealthy" that may have been a poor choice of words. But to afford to give a horse to your daughter (or afford the upkeep or whatever), you have to have more money than your average working class family. Or else live out in the country. Some families in the country keep horses for city folk, at a cost.

Hobbies in general tend to cost money. Obviously some are more expensive than others.

as a child, when I was around 13 years old I

1. took karate
2. played little league baseball
3. played the piano and took piano lessons
4. played the violin the Arkansas youth symphony
5. played Jr high basketball team


im' not even going to bother to include my video game collection which included at the time what was that 7th grade.. a playstation, a N64, a super nintendo, a sega.. i didn't want for **** as a kid.

that's a good $400-500 a month right there just on me being a spoiled brat lol. piano lessons alone were $280 a month.

hobbies are hobbies.

This is weak advice, not because there's no truth to it, but because it lacks any meaning to the individual. Where's the road-map to develop hobbies? Where's the recommendations on where to go to learn about them? How does one interact with women they'll meet at these mystery hobby events? In short, this is no different than telling someone to "be confident" or "be yourself". Now it's "be confident, just be yourself, having interesting hobbies!"

everyone is different. i can't tell you how to become interesting.

that's the paradox in itself lol

if i told you how to become interesting, you wouldn't be interesting because you would be what i told you to be. everyone has to figure that part out for themselves.

 

[backbreaker]

When I said "more wealthy" that may have been a poor choice of words. But to afford to give a horse to your daughter (or afford the upkeep or whatever), you have to have more money than your average working class family. Or else live out in the country. Some families in the country keep horses for city folk, at a cost.

Hobbies in general tend to cost money. Obviously some are more expensive than others.

as a child, when I was around 13 years old I

1. took karate
2. played little league baseball
3. played the piano and took piano lessons
4. played the violin the Arkansas youth symphony

that's a good $400-500 a month right there just on me being a spoiled brat lol. piano lessons alone were $280 a month.

hobbies are hobbies.

This is weak advice, not because there's no truth to it, but because it lacks any meaning to the individual. Where's the road-map to develop hobbies? Where's the recommendations on where to go to learn about them? How does one interact with women they'll meet at these mystery hobby events? In short, this is no different than telling someone to "be confident" or "be yourself". Now it's "be confident, just be yourself, having interesting hobbies!"

everyone is different. i can't tell you how to become interesting.

that's the paradox in itself lol

if i told you how to become interesting, you wouldn't be interesting because you would be what i told you to be. everyone has to figure that part out for themselves.

Anyway, I definitely do think there is at least a lower grade of woman. A type of women you should definitely not try to domesticate. Don't make a ho a housewife, as they say. I also can't discount the value of a good upbringing. It doesn't guarantee the girl will turn out well, but it can help.

lol, then you open up a whole nother can of worms,beucase well, let's just put it out there, as Serialized3 so eloquently put it, I am in fact black. On this forum the majority view is if you are a white woman and you date a black man, you either have low self esteem, are a drug addict or unattractive.

I think those shaming techniques and the "low class" stuff personally go hand in hand. Both rationalizations of behavior that does not positively effect that person.


I think what i am trying to say is, you have clearly define what "well" is. IF you think about it, "well" is extremely subjective and usually means what i think you should be doing. Most white guys would shame a white woman for dating a black man, and assume she wasn't brought up "well". some guys wills hame a woman for doing drugs like weed or what not, some won't.

I mean, you have your extreme cases.. lol, Mellisa the crack***** obviously didn't turn out 'well' lol. But the vast majority of "a person turnin out well" is pretty subjective stuff. girl cheats, girl ****s another guy shes more attracted to, girl flakes out, girl likes to party a little, that's all pretty subjective stuff

 

[zekko]

that's a good $400-500 a month right there just on me being a spoiled brat lol. piano lessons alone were $280 a month.

Some parents will indulge (or invest in) their children moreso than others, whether they have the money or not.

But when you're talking about $800 a month upkeep on a horse, that's like $10,000 a year. The median family income right now in the US is $49,445. That would be 20% of the family income (before taxes) to keep a horse. People would do it if it's something they're passionate about, but I doubt they're just going to drop that on a girl's birthday present without giving it some deep consideration. I imagine most people who own horses have a larger income than that.

On this forum the majority view is if you are a white woman and you date a black man, you either have low self esteem, are a drug addict or unattractive.

You've been here longer than I have, but I have never heard anybody say anything disparaging here about a white woman dating a black man. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but I haven't heard it. I'm white, but I know too many girls who are dating black men to find it unusual.

The only problem I ever had with it was I used to work in this place, there was a small group of us white guys, and a small group of white girls. All the girls were dating either black or Latino gentlemen. I had no problem with this, but they were all constantly bad mouthing white guys in front of us - "I would never date a white man, blah blah". We got a little sick of that. I mean, I don't care who you date, but don't tell me I'm a piece of sh!t because of it, lol.

 

[Duffdog]

this is the difference between theorizing and living life

you are wrong. just leave my post at that. don't have the time this morning

really? Wow, your capacity for exposition astounds.

I especially like the part where you say that horses are not THAT expensive. Well, then you just agreed with me and betrayed your own argument. You what else is not THAT expensive? Private jets.

Any hobby that attracts females is expensive. Since you just now discovered this fact and attempted to put your own spin on it by calling it "interesting", you are a novice in this area and cannot possibly offer direction to others. I on the other hand am not a novice in this subject matter. You would be better served by listening to someone who KNOWS what he is talking about than to your own discoveries and misapplication of commonly known information.

Eventually, you will agree with everything I have written. It is only a matter of time and experience.

 

[Tazman]

Any hobby that attracts females is expensive.

I have to agree with this, in fact I can't even think of an exception, atleast while we're talking about "attractive" women.

You'll find hot chicks wherever the money is, or where they believe they can meet a guy with it.

 

[Nutz]

I have to agree with this, in fact I can't even think of an exception, atleast while we're talking about "attractive" women.

You'll find hot chicks wherever the money is, or where they believe they can meet a guy with it.

Fitness hobbies like rock climbing are great. However, like you said, they can get pricey.

 

[backbreaker]

really? Wow, your capacity for exposition astounds.

I especially like the part where you say that horses are not THAT expensive. Well, then you just agreed with me and betrayed your own argument. You what else is not THAT expensive? Private jets.

Any hobby that attracts females is expensive. Since you just now discovered this fact and attempted to put your own spin on it by calling it "interesting", you are a novice in this area and cannot possibly offer direction to others. I on the other hand am not a novice in this subject matter. You would be better served by listening to someone who KNOWS what he is talking about than to your own discoveries and misapplication of commonly known information.

Eventually, you will agree with everything I have written. It is only a matter of time and experience.

'
There is no need to be as hostile as you are being. it's a freaking message board.



you blatantly left out the AA reference I put in there, and it's just as valid. I could have made this exact same post using AA as a reference..

the point, has less to do with having sweet hobbies as much as it has to do with throwing yourself into something you are passionate about, rather it be work, a particular hobby, a religion, whatever it is, and finding like mined people.

I talk about my wife alot, but just to make you happy and to hit upon this point, i want to talk about a girl from the past that i dated that hits this point home. This was well before i had any idea of any of this.

I walked into an AA meeting one day and there was this very nictly shaped redhead there. at the time i was pretty new to AA, about 3 months in, she had like 10 months at the time. but i was pretty serious about AA at the time. I was the guy that went to the meetings at 6:30, then another at 5pm, and if it was a wednesday or Friday one later at night as well. turns out she was the exact same type.

i'd be lying if i said we had this magical spark from day one. we didn't lol. in fact we didn't talk to each other for about a month. but she kept seeing me at meetings, usually myself. that in combination with my weight loss that i was making, she started showing interest. we talked after the meeting one day and she asked if i wanted a ride to the 6:30am meeting the next day, as my house way on the way from her place. about 3 weeks later we are doing everything together. we became actually pretty damn close in a friend aspect, not LJBF but, if i had a problem she was the person i would call before anyone and visa versa. she actually saved me from relapsing about 5 months in. next thingh you know she's over my house everyday, we are going out to eat.. i'm getting hints that she is interested in me. this is a girl who could have dated anyone in hte room.. very good looking and not only very good looking, she was rich. she never came out and said how rich she was, but she didn't work, drove a nissan maxima fully loaded and lived in a 2 story house by herself that was pretty nice, she was a trust fund baby. never asked me for a dime, we never did anything blatantly expensive.

one day we are going to a meeting and she asks me do i want her to pick me up, i say sure, she picks me up and she just put it together that day. it's a Friday, we go to the 5:30 meeting, afterwards she said some friends of hers wanted to get together and asked would i come with her. i said okay, we went, and she's all over me. i knew something was going to happen that night, just had that feeling. so about 30 minutes later i say **** it, and i go in for a kiss, and she just let it all out. later that night she told me she had been "extremely attracted to me". she said i was always cute,. but what really attracted her to me was "you are the only person that i know that is as serious about AA that I know as I am, and i've been thinking we could make a good couple becuase we have a lot in common"


you try to pick apart my post but in reality my post is nothing more than an expanded view of the 48 laws of power

Law 44 ​

Disarm and Infuriate with the Mirror Effect ​

The mirror reflects reality, but it is also the perfect tool for deception: When you mirror your enemies, doing exactly as they do, they cannot figure out your strategy. The Mirror Effect mocks and humiliates them, making them overreact. By holding up a mirror to their psyches, you seduce them with the illusion that you share their values; by holding up a mirror to their actions, you teach them a lesson. Few can resist the power of Mirror Effect.

The only thing I am saying, is that you can be more genuine about it when you actually DO share those values and beliefs.

This chick, the redhead, was very very good looking. not only was she good looking, she had money. she didn't need a guy for their money. do you know how many guys that i had seen try to talk to her or get with her? damn near every guy in AA. Every time we would go to a meeting i'd have to wait by the car while 4-5 guys took their turns talking to her after the meeting.


When you share the same beliefs, values, passions as someone, you connect with them on a much deeper level than anyone can. That connection is an "in". it has nothing to do with how much money you spend on hobbies, that's taking this down an extremely trivial path that i was not intended to take this down.

What attracted her to me, besides my still blossoming DJ skillset at the time, was the fact that I "got" her. we had the same goals, and even if she wasn't in the picture, i would be just as passionate about mjy recovery as I was when she WAS in the picture. I enhanced her recovery and she enhanced mine. There would be times she would call me and i would quote **** straight out of the big book, or times that she would be dealing with something and because i knew her pretty well i could call her on her BS or help her deal with something, and she knew me well enough to do the same to me.

It doesn't matter what it is. It can be something as cheap as AA or something as expensive as horse racing, if you are passionate about it, you are going to be automatically attracted to someone who is passionate about that.


BTW we dated for about 6 months, she didn't do anything wrong, we just broke up when I moved. As much as I liked her, nad she was a cool cat, i had a life to go live.




The other day, i was watching a documentary on tiger sharks. Tiger sharks are ****ing bad ass. Anyway, they were doing what they do, and all this guy wanted to do, like, his goal in life, was to get people to stop killing tiger sharks. he would go down and swim with them just to show people that they weren't as dangreous to humans as poeple made them out to be. So they cut to him going to do what he does, and his 'partner' is a bad ass, probably hb8 south african chick, who "shares the same passions as he does" and she gets on tV and she's talking about how ****ed up it is that people are killing tiger sharks.. they go all around the world together,trying to save tiger sharks.


now, step back, do you think for one freaking second, that "mystery" stands a chance against tiger shark guy lol? this dude could be the biggest AFC on the face of the earth (though anyone who has the nuts to dive in the water with freaking tiger sharks is pretty pimp to begin with) and she would stick with the tiger shark dude, because they are literally a definite chief aim together. that goes beyond any gaming, and tactics, you can bring to the table. the dude was not ugly or anything.

you see the same thing with the late steve irwin, his wife was the same way. lol, zarko, there is a couple in professional show jumping, meredith Michael beerdaum and her husband, both are professional show jumpers, and both are the best 2 in the world at what they do.


And it's not that difficult. Whatever it is you are passionate about instead of sitting home posting about it. don't talk about it be about it. just do it. the chips will fall.

 

[st_99]

48 laws of power

I had a HB that I was infatuated with over a couple years ago and I think a lot of it had to do with her mirroring me. She was really good at it, I think she was doing it deliberately, she knew what she was doing. She was a pro.

She would mirror my style of speach, what i was drinking, repeat things I said, and throw in some kino etc.. she was just really good at it and it worked like a charm. It cerainly wasn't her looks because the first time I met her I thought of her as a 6, then she jumped to a 10 when she hooked me.

Another thing that tipped me off to what really was going on was everytime somebody spent a little time with her, guys and girls.. they would say "i like her, we are A LOT ALIKE" Thats when i knew, that b*tch was good. At least I banged her.

 

[Duffdog]

'
There is no need to be as hostile as you are being. it's a freaking message board.



you blatantly left out the AA reference I put in there, and it's just as valid. I could have made this exact same post using AA as a reference..

the point, has less to do with having sweet hobbies as much as it has to do with throwing yourself into something you are passionate about, rather it be work, a particular hobby, a religion, whatever it is, and finding like mined people.

I talk about my wife alot, but just to make you happy and to hit upon this point, i want to talk about a girl from the past that i dated that hits this point home. This was well before i had any idea of any of this.

I walked into an AA meeting one day and there was this very nictly shaped redhead there. at the time i was pretty new to AA, about 3 months in, she had like 10 months at the time. but i was pretty serious about AA at the time. I was the guy that went to the meetings at 6:30, then another at 5pm, and if it was a wednesday or Friday one later at night as well. turns out she was the exact same type.

i'd be lying if i said we had this magical spark from day one. we didn't lol. in fact we didn't talk to each other for about a month. but she kept seeing me at meetings, usually myself. that in combination with my weight loss that i was making, she started showing interest. we talked after the meeting one day and she asked if i wanted a ride to the 6:30am meeting the next day, as my house way on the way from her place. about 3 weeks later we are doing everything together. we became actually pretty damn close in a friend aspect, not LJBF but, if i had a problem she was the person i would call before anyone and visa versa. she actually saved me from relapsing about 5 months in. next thingh you know she's over my house everyday, we are going out to eat.. i'm getting hints that she is interested in me. this is a girl who could have dated anyone in hte room.. very good looking and not only very good looking, she was rich. she never came out and said how rich she was, but she didn't work, drove a nissan maxima fully loaded and lived in a 2 story house by herself that was pretty nice, she was a trust fund baby. never asked me for a dime, we never did anything blatantly expensive.

one day we are going to a meeting and she asks me do i want her to pick me up, i say sure, she picks me up and she just put it together that day. it's a Friday, we go to the 5:30 meeting, afterwards she said some friends of hers wanted to get together and asked would i come with her. i said okay, we went, and she's all over me. i knew something was going to happen that night, just had that feeling. so about 30 minutes later i say **** it, and i go in for a kiss, and she just let it all out. later that night she told me she had been "extremely attracted to me". she said i was always cute,. but what really attracted her to me was "you are the only person that i know that is as serious about AA that I know as I am, and i've been thinking we could make a good couple becuase we have a lot in common"


you try to pick apart my post but in reality my post is nothing more than an expanded view of the 48 laws of power


The only thing I am saying, is that you can be more genuine about it when you actually DO share those values and beliefs.

This chick, the redhead, was very very good looking. not only was she good looking, she had money. she didn't need a guy for their money. do you know how many guys that i had seen try to talk to her or get with her? damn near every guy in AA. Every time we would go to a meeting i'd have to wait by the car while 4-5 guys took their turns talking to her after the meeting.


When you share the same beliefs, values, passions as someone, you connect with them on a much deeper level than anyone can. That connection is an "in". it has nothing to do with how much money you spend on hobbies, that's taking this down an extremely trivial path that i was not intended to take this down.

What attracted her to me, besides my still blossoming DJ skillset at the time, was the fact that I "got" her. we had the same goals, and even if she wasn't in the picture, i would be just as passionate about mjy recovery as I was when she WAS in the picture. I enhanced her recovery and she enhanced mine. There would be times she would call me and i would quote **** straight out of the big book, or times that she would be dealing with something and because i knew her pretty well i could call her on her BS or help her deal with something, and she knew me well enough to do the same to me.

It doesn't matter what it is. It can be something as cheap as AA or something as expensive as horse racing, if you are passionate about it, you are going to be automatically attracted to someone who is passionate about that.


BTW we dated for about 6 months, she didn't do anything wrong, we just broke up when I moved. As much as I liked her, nad she was a cool cat, i had a life to go live.






And it's not that difficult. Whatever it is you are passionate about instead of sitting home posting about it. don't talk about it be about it. just do it. the chips will fall.

Interesting anecdote about the chic from your AA meeting.

Want to know a secret? I did the same thing at my DUI class a couple years ago with the hottest girl in there. In that occurence, the roles were reversed. At the time I was an executive and had all sorts of money from multiple income streams, drove 4 cars, owned a house already and benched around ~275. She was just a really hot, young college girl who was so striking many of the other guys couldn't look at her in the face without ejaculating all over themselves (ok, maybe that was an exaggeration), but she is still really hot and my GF and I have 3some orgies with her once in a while when we meet up.

Not the point.

The point is that I was the most confident person in the room with the best hobbies and the best outlook on life for no other reason than I didn't have to worry about money. Subconsciously, women can connect the dots about a mans demeanor and determine if he is on top of the world or not without him even saying anything. One could say that the women "could smell success on me"

There are many scientific ways to rationalize that last sentence, but suffice it to say that the concept exists in real life and is not challenged scientifically.

This is what happened with you and that AA chic: She determined (through no action on your part) that you were not a male who struggles to attract women and built up in her head a fantasy about you. Everything you did or said had nothing to do with her attraction to you AT ALL!!! I hate it when guys say things like "I'm the type of guy who understands her..." or other fake a55 feminist bullsh1t. The fact is that you were PRESELECTED based on factors that were OUT OF YOUR CONTROL and nothing any of the other males could have said or done would influence her attraction to you. You could have thrown rocks at her and she still would have wanted you to bone her in the middle of the floor at the meeting. Then, she got bored with you and is now with a rich CEO after "slumming it" with some guy from her AA class.

So where does this leave us? Instead of giving out stupid advise like "be confident", "have interesting hobbies", "own the frame" etc, etc ad nauseum, we should concentrate on giving real advise that might accomplish something. At all costs we should avoid my favorite pile of BS -- the "48 laws of power"...which does nothing to specifically address what males should do to attract women, and instead persists in the mystification of already discovered and confirmed facts hiding within a petty attempt to explicate a few pre-existing concepts using religious overtones.

Real advise is just that, real. In a very real sense, women want guys who are superior to other men with regards to whatever they are doing. Examples:

Auto racing -- girls want the winner
Philosophy-- girls want the guy on stage who is brave enough to come forward and express his passions in front of the group
Investing -- girls want the guy who has the highest percentage return on his investments
Engineering -- girls want the guy who explains his designs eloquently to venture capitalists and gets the contracts
Walking down the street -- girls want the guy who doesn't have to move out of the way for all the other guys, but instead subconsciously commands them to move without trying.
DJ'ing -- girls want the guy who doesn't trainwreck and gets the gigs while the other posers do not.
Shark Diving -- girls want the guy who still is alive, not the dead guy who sucked at it...


As with any of my examples, this applies to HOT girls only. There are many exceptions to the rules I put forth, but they only apply to average girls. Your advise to "just do it" accomplishes nothing. I know tons of males who tried to "just do it", sucked, and are still single. A male MUST be superior to other males in one way or another or he is doomed to either marry an ugly chic or die alone. You can't just suck at everything and think you will win. You have to win in order to win.

 

[backbreaker]

Is horse racing interesting to most women? Probably not. I'd hazard a guess it's not that interesting to most men either (under 50 that is haha no offense).

But you know what? Just being a varied person with stuff going on is a must for any quality woman. I'm a nurse, volunteer fire fighter, and a blues guitarist/harmonica player. Even those with a passing interest in those like that I do them.

http://www.couriermail.com.au/enter...fe-has-the-magic/story-e6freq7o-1226224874768

"I was actually named after a horse and I grew up around them in North Carolina, so seeing these majestic animals race, and the yearling sales, will be a thrill for me," Decker said.

ladies and gentleman the defense rests.

 

[Mr.Positive]

I think it's more than just having hobbies that make you interesting, it's having passions for those hobbies.

To have that passion, you have to truly love it, and it's not just a hobby. It's more than that.

Take mountain climbing for example. How many women are you going to meet on a freezing cold mountain? Zero. Yet guys train their whole lives to climb Mt. Everest. One mountain at a time they get better, stronger, more successful...they take the beating, and temporary failures...and it all leads up to the day they reach the summit and nothing can compare to that one moment, for those guys, and their passions.

I think women can smell when a guy has passions like that. Is a guy going to meet a hot chick on Mt. Everest. No, but a guy who can climb Mt. Everest is going to have no problems meeting women.

 

[Jitterbug]

No, but a guy who can climb Mt. Everest is going to have no problems meeting women.

Wishful thinking.

They don't really care about men's passion that much, unless that passion somehow makes them money or other resources, or elevate their social status.

Hardcore video gamers after all are just as passionate about their hobbies as anyone else.

Women can't smell passion, but they can smell success (and loserdom - although the guys who failed are just as passionate as the winners).

I don't know any guy who's climbed Mt Everest, but I know a fella who's done Kilimanjaro and he's struggling to get the attention of some completely average plain jane, while some arsehole who happens to be a smooth dancer (a 10,000 times easier task) is giving her the run-around.

 

[backbreaker]

I dont' know how this got back on the have hobbies because they mke you interesting bit, but was not the jist of my post whatsoever. lol it's like everyone keeps trying to force feed the conversation back to that direction