I have the confidence and courage, but just dont know what to say lol

[eaglez1177]

Hey all, recently ive been having a problem with running out of things to say when I meet a chick I like for the first time. I have all the confidence and courage, I can feel it, like I have no problem approaching a girl, its just that I dont really know what to say/run out of things to say once I get going. Im not sure why it happens, I feel kinda nervous, but then part of me doesnt really feel all too nervous.

What can I do to make the conversation go a little smoother and not be as awkward? I hate it when I run out of things to say, cuz then I just wind up bailing out/making myself look dumb/making things awkward/saying something random or irrelevant to fill the void.

EDIT: and when I do get into a conversation, it always seems to be small talk, like just talk about random everyday things or something around me or something i noticed. I need to learn how to say more flirty things rather than just be boring and talking about the normal average stuff.

 

[SickAgain]

I really don't think you are as confidence you make yourself out to be. Confidence comes from a sense of comfort of knowing how to handle set situations, in this case friendly banter. Work on these skills and your confidence and conversation shall blossom like a maturing tulip.

 

[IamtheAlphamale]

Word. Thats just how it is man. You need to become comfortable doing something before you can become good at it.

 

[fertileTurtle]

Conversation is all about culture. Learn about the different cultures. I like sports a lot, so shyt, can go on for hours. Whatever. I still have a lot to work on, but find out what she's into and then just b.s. till the cows come home.

Another thing to do is think up stories either true or not. Be a storyteller. Do that for like 45 mins then try to isolate her and makeout.

I know this is a halfassed post, but I have to go to work. Later.

 

[She_feelin_Me]

I wanna add something....

Women love to talk and loves to talk about themselves...Ask questions like what do you do for a living? are you happy in that field? when you are not working how you spend your evenings? your weekends? what are you into? you smoke or drink? pop pillz,lol hell you can ask anything to get her rambling...I always do this and she be talking a hole in my head.

When you see the convo is slowly coming down just close the deal..."well i need to get going, here's my number call me tonight around 8 so we can finish up our convo".

 

[Ease]

I wanna add something....

Women love to talk and loves to talk about themselves...Ask questions like what do you do for a living? are you happy in that field? when you are not working how you spend your evenings? your weekends? what are you into? you smoke or drink? pop pillz,lol hell you can ask anything to get her rambling...I always do this and she be talking a hole in my head.

When you see the convo is slowly coming down just close the deal..."well i need to get going, here's my number call me tonight around 8 so we can finish up our convo".

does this ever work? lol

 

[She_feelin_Me]

**** Yea!

Me and my boy went to this ghetto ass club in the city, everybody dancing and sweating and **** and me and my boy just standing there...well I was ****faced, had wayy too many to drink but I was cool and so was my boy. I looked over to my right and see this darkskin, I give her an 8. We make eye contact and I said "you by yourself?", she replied "yea I can never get my friends out of the house...they just wanna sit at home either be all booed with their boyfriend or just do nothing". Im like o okay "this your first time here?" she replied no but I come here every so often I just love going to a crunk club, blah blah blah blah blah. That whole convo I probably asked maybe 3 to 4 questions...She did most of the talking and I ended up getting the number and it took me 5 mins just standing there and then i moved on stumbling everywhere,lol.

If you talking to a girl and she is choosing you its a wrap just let the convo flow but if she aint then walk away because you just wasting your time OR you just want to get some practice in on the playing field.

 

[Da Realist]

Actually, I think this covered in the DJ Bible. Just get her to talk about herself and all you have to do is listen. You'll come off as mysterious because she won't know as much about you as you do her.

 

[RMM]

Actually, I think this covered in the DJ Bible. Just get her to talk about herself and all you have to do is listen. You'll come off as mysterious because she won't know as much about you as you do her.

For what I understood of the DJ Bible, it works like that but you have to frame your questions to be open ended, and you have to chip in and have some input yourself. If you just ask 50 questions and stand there saying nothing, she won't have an impression of you at all. You do need to add something good.

 

[fertileTurtle]

does this ever work? lol

Have you ever tried it? Don't be afraid to get out there and try and YES make and arse out of yourself. Life is an experiment.

 

[eaglez1177]

OKay I kinda get what you guys are saying about the open ended stuff...but what do i do if she doesnt go off talking about all this stuff when I ask her a question?

 

[DonGorgon]

OK then have the confidence and courage to say what ever the hell you want..lol

 

[C-quenced]

eaglez1177 I know exactly where you're coming from bro. You see so much potential in yourself but just don't know where to begin when it comes to talking. I have the same exact problem and I can almost be certain that most of the replies in this post are of little to no help for you (no offense to any of you guys btw).

I understand what you mean about these bland small talk conversations. They serve absolutely no purpose other then a "hello", "goodbye" type of interaction, unless ofcourse you're skilled enough to direct it into something fun and enjoyable for the two of you. When you talk to a girl you want to have fun and vice versa. You want to see her laughing, intrigued, special etc. and have her thinking about you after the convo but how does this get done?

 

[eaglez1177]

eaglez1177 I know exactly where you're coming from bro. You see so much potential in yourself but just don't know where to begin when it comes to talking. I have the same exact problem and I can almost be certain that most of the replies in this post are of little to no help for you (no offense to any of you guys btw).

I understand what you mean about these bland small talk conversations. They serve absolutely no purpose other then a "hello", "goodbye" type of interaction, unless ofcourse you're skilled enough to direct it into something fun and enjoyable for the two of you. When you talk to a girl you want to have fun and vice versa. You want to see her laughing, intrigued, special etc. and have her thinking about you after the convo but how does this get done?

EXACTLY! this is exactly what im asking thank you for clearing things up lol.

 

[Amberjhons]

Take it easy.

 

[C-quenced]

EXACTLY! this is exactly what im asking thank you for clearing things up lol.


No problem man.

Does anyone have any sound advice?

 

[eaglez1177]

=[ anyone??