"I have plans." Rejection? A "not yet"?

[starfishandcoffee]

Added a female friend's mutual friend on Facebook. Generally not how I do things.

We talked for about 20 minutes (decent enough period of time). She talked about how she does pushups during downtime at work, I told her how I'd cheat and tickle her if she ever tried to arm wrestle me, yadda yadda yadda. Light flirty talk, not bad I think for 20 minutes with a near-stranger.

After this, I figure...time to make something up and get the hell out of here. I cut to the chase.

Me: Homework calls, but I'd love to chat again. Actually, I'd love to get coffee Sunday. You game?
HB: Prior engagements on sunday, sorry but yeah, we'll definitely chat again. Have fun with homework.
Me: No prob ttyl

I usually believe girls when they say "I have plans for _____". However, this is Monday and I asked her out for coffee on a day that's 6 days away. Am I right in assuming that nobody makes plans this far in advance? Is this just a straight up "no", or is this a "maybe on the right week"?

I'm ready to move on to the next one, though...seems to me that she would have offered an alternate time to meet if she was really into me.

 

[VladPatton]

I submit:

Rejection. She didn't offer a new time/date for the meet up next time. Oh well, you tried. I give you credit. Try once more in a week or two, then delete that biznitch if she ditches again.

 

[starfishandcoffee]

I submit:

Rejection. She didn't offer a new time/date for the meet up next time. Oh well, you tried. I give you credit. Try once more in a week or two, then delete that biznitch if she ditches again.

one more question - and this is concerning the mutual friend that I have occasional breaks with.

Don't mention it to her friend? Ask her myself?

I'm under the impression that a window is closing here, and if I don't ask her out correctly in t-minus _______ days, I'll never see her naked and should next her.

 

[VladPatton]

Never, ever include anyone, especially another girl! Do it all on your own. If shıt goes south, let em talk amongst themselves about you. Ask in a few days, and if she refuses again, it's a done deal.

 

[IndeedSir]

The lack of counter offer is key. I have plans weeks in advance. Focusing on the wrong details. The advice above is right for this level of involvement. Two strikes. She's got one. In my opinion it sounds like a rejection. It happens more than it doesn't, not a big deal.

 

[Uncharted]

I'm in the same situation with a new girl, actually. I asked her out and she said she was going to be away, but didn't counter-offer. Haven't talked/texted since then.

Right now I'm chalking it up to rejection as well, but if she reaches out I might try one more time. I usually give them two unless I get a straight rej (IHAB).

 

[Nickface]

For any of you guys that get rejected without counter-offer, instantly move on. That's what we call a soft rejection in the industry my friends. Next her and never think about the chick again.

You already did what I hate and that is talking to a girl through Facebook. Facebook is single handily the worse medium to use in getting/banging a chick period. Also don't tell any of your mutual friends about this and get on with the next one.

 

[kenpiffyjr]

If a chick who you thought was cute as hell and wanted to bang on site asked you out this Sunday...would you just say "no, already have plans. Have fun with hw! "

No, you'd be like "I already have plans but what about..."


Next!

 

[Megaman XIV]

Early rejection.

Next any girl instantly who flakes or gives a lame excuse. Would she do this to Brad Pitt? She'd make herself so available.

 

[CharlieCW]

Sounds kinda like rejection, so I suggest you take it easy and move on.

However, I always offer the benefit of the doubt, maybe she had some issues she will not talk about now, so you don't lose anything if you try it again in a week or so, in a very casual way. Don't dare mention it while you chat, however.

 

[Krueg]

I agree with everyone else, her not counter-offering shows low interest. You could try ONE more time, but no more! Though, if you just randomly sent a friend request to some chick who you dont even know yet... that's probably why she rejected.

 

[Uncharted]

Just as a follow-up, I got a text today from the girl asking if I was free next week so pulling back worked for me.

 

[Dgwizdal]

Nice