I have her work#. now I need to call her

[00Kevin]

ok 4 days have past and I plan to call her now.

This is the situation.

I have this girls work number from her business card. I told her that I was going to call her out for a coffee the last time I saw her. I also told her friends that I would do that when I had the time.

So at this point I'm trying to figure out what to say to her.

If I call her at work she might be very busy. I think need to get her cell phone number or at the very least leave my number with her so she can call me back. I would like to call her out for that coffee right away but if she says no or doesn't feel like it then i'll be left without her real number. so this is what I thought I would say.

"hey you, it's kevin, I just thought I would give you a call."

she says, "hey how are you." or something like that

I say, "I'm good, just busy very lately."

she says something else that I just ignore.

then I say, "I don't know if you are busy or not, but I have some time for that coffee today. just let me know when you can take a break and i'll come and meet you.

she says something else that makes it all complicated and doesn't commit. I just ignore that again

then I say, "ok well give me your cell phone number and i'll call u out after work some time this week."

if she refuses then I tell her that she isn't fun, next her, and bow out.

I would like to use some c&f and just talk to her but I think i need to cut to the chase considering I only have her work number. Under this circumstance she could just end the conversation very quickly by saying that she has to go or that she is busy. I think i need to asume that she is busy and make my move quick.

any suggestions?

 

[Sir Shags Alot]

I feel you are really over thinking this. Just ask her for a cup of coffee....not very hard. If she says no, who cares, its not like she is the last women on earth.

 

[00Kevin]

this girl is my age in her mid 20's and she owns her own hair salon.

 

[00Kevin]

yeah.. I'm over thinking this

 

[00Kevin]

ok it is done.

I just called her work and asked for her

when she answered she didn't know who I was at first, because she thought I was one of her clients. so I reminded her in a fun way and she seemed suprised but friendly. I then told her that I had time today for that coffee. she said ok and that she would have time later on in the day. She said she was just in the midle of a hair cut. I said, "ok i'll just give you my number and you can call me". she then read it off from her call display and said she would call me.

so I guess it was just as I expected. she would be busy and I wouldn't have time to say much.

 

[00Kevin]

this is my first HB9 ... and I'm almost a master

 

[JSH]

uv spent long, stop over analyzin please, but anyway good luck

 

[00Kevin]

DAMNIT !!! that is exactly what I should of done gigalo

here is an update.

she did call me back on my cell phone from her work (so I didn't get her number on call display).

she invited me over to her salon to have coffee with her there. I didn't like that idea so I didn't give her a definiate yes to that. I told her I might be able to come over a little later on if I could get out of a meeting I hated that someone else had scheduled.

I then calmly asked her for her cell phone # and told her I would call her if I could get out of it.

then she said that she kinda had a little problem with that. I said, wow really ? she explained that no guy ever wants to be her friend. I said, "wow that is really too bad. sorry to hear that"

the then she got really blunt.. (she was on the rag for sure)
and said if you want to be my fiend then fine. but don't try to be my friend to start a relationship either.

I just said. wow. you are blunt. and she said,. "yeah that is me"

I said, "well I'm impressed. I can respect and appreciate that. We can just be friends then . Anyway, I have to go i'll talk to you a bit later ok"

after that I thought about this, the afc thing to do would be to cry. but the dj thing to do would be to ignore it and just go over to that salon, buy some coffee, and bring it to her.

I'm going to do just that and only stay for 10 mins max.

 

[00Kevin]

the more of a HB they are the harder it is. I think a rule should be NEVER ask for a HB9's cell phone number . she will think you only want to **** her

 

[00Kevin]

update

ok I just got back to the office. I totally DJed this! 007 style

after all the doubt in my mind about going over to that salon with some coffee i did it anyway

when I got there she was shocked and happy. it was perfect timing. She couldn't get her coffee maker working and I just showed up with a coffee..

She showed me around her high class salon and then we sat down and talked. She was impressed .

She thought I would be all mad at her. I just laughed at that. Then we went to behind the bassment door, she sat beside me on top of the stairs, and we talked while she had a smoke. She told me all about her salon and told me about her family.

so all is good. Whether she likes it or not, she is on my list of girls now let the game begin. I have other girls to date now. she will give it up I know it

 

[Don of Truth]

Originally posted by 00Kevin


the then she got really blunt.. (she was on the rag for sure)
and said if you want to be my fiend then fine. but don't try to be my friend to start a relationship either.

How about saying "I don't think that far ahead sweetie, personally I'm still trying to decide wether or not you are the type of person who I would like to be my friend"

Sounds cool ! lol

Hey...good job on not being upset. Emotions are a pain to control. I think that this is good practice for you too. I'm in a mindset right now where I try not to sweat things (although I still do sometimes)...and just learn from them.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

What guy gets a hb9's number because he wants to be her friend? Who are you kidding! The afc thing to do is not to acknowledge your romantic interest in a woman. Don't follow her around like a lost puppy!! Don't do her any favors as a friend!

I guess this is how you young guys pursue woman nowadays!!

This is what a man would say, "Hell yeah I'm pursuing you because you are a woman. You don't think I asked you to go out for coffee to become friends, do you?? Why in the hell would a man do that?" "Later kid!!"

 

[Don of Truth]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover

This is what a man would say, "Hell yeah I'm pursuing you because you are a woman. You don't think I asked you to go out for coffee to become friends, do you?? Why in the hell would a man do that?" "Later kid!!"

Niceeeeeeeeeeeeee one ! That rocks !
The situation that I always face is that rarely do things like that pop into my head on-the-fly !
I suspect this is due to the fact that I have had AFC thoughts circulating my head in the past and was not in the Dj mindset.

 

[00Kevin]

PL.. you are dead right with that statement. I'll have to take this into consideration.

But at the moment I think it is like making a long term investment. even if you don't get the girl you just make a firend with her and go for other girls. getting mad won't get you anything in return. she is not going to run to your arms you will just break the connection.

DJing is like making an RRSP contribution. at some point down the road she will be horney and there won't be a guy around. at that point you can cash in and F her.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

This is the difference between the old days and the new days - guys didn't pursue nor did we become friends with women!!!!! It was only the effeminates who shared such an interest with them as 'friends'.

Every girl knew why you were talking to them and it sure in the heck wasn't because you needed a female friend!!!!

That was the first thing that entered my mind - you'll know you are a dj when the next girl tells you the same and the first thing that comes into your mind is what I stated above!!! Until then you are a dj in traning wheels.

DDkevin, you are stunned by her beauty and you are trying to appease her and gain her approval in "hopes" that one day she likes you enough to spread her legs - THIS IS AFC! This is what chumps do!

If you would have said what I stated above, she would have respected you much more as a man and possibly changed her perspective of you towards the better! No guy ever said this to her before. It takes balls!

When you do not care about 'losing' a woman's interest because of what you say or do, then you have arrived, not to DJ status but to the level of a man!!!

I'm not saying get mad at her - just be honest and tell her of your romantic intent - she knows this already - she is not a fool! She knows that you are bowing down to her!!

 

[00Kevin]

ok I thought about this a bit more.

DON'T tell her off that is useless. It is best to keep your investment in its place.

The trick is not to act like an AFC when you are friends with her.

for example, if she calls you and starts to ***** about her feelings. tell her that she isn't your girlfriend and those conversations are off limits.

if she wraps her arms around you, tell her to get her hands off you. then tell her off for not respecting your friendship.

when you see a girl walking down the road act like you do with your friends.

you are not ignoring your romantic feelings for her. after all, as a ladies man you have soooo many other girls to pick from. It is just part of the chase that you enjoy so much.

Don't forget this girl is hot and has many hot friends that you have yet to meet and DJ. If she isn't impressed yet by you, "the ladies man"; then her friends will be.

I think that A DJ can be friends with a girl. It is just that at some point in the future he cashes in.

 

[00Kevin]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
This is the difference between the old days and the new days - guys didn't pursue nor did we become friends with women!!!!! It was only the effeminates who shared such an interest with them as 'friends'.

Every girl knew why you were talking to them and it sure in the heck wasn't because you needed a female friend!!!!

That was the first thing that entered my mind - you'll know you are a dj when the next girl tells you the same and the first thing that comes into your mind is what I stated above!!! Until then you are a dj in traning wheels.

DDkevin, you are stunned by her beauty and you are trying to appease her and gain her approval in "hopes" that one day she likes you enough to spread her legs - THIS IS AFC! This is what chumps do!

If you would have said what I stated above, she would have respected you much more as a man and possibly changed her perspective of you towards the better! No guy ever said this to her before. It takes balls!

When you do not care about 'losing' a woman's interest because of what you say or do, then you have arrived, not to DJ status but to the level of a man!!!

I'm not saying get mad at her - just be honest and tell her of your romantic intent - she knows this already - she is not a fool! She knows that you are bowing down to her!!

hmm... all very convincing. I'm not sure if she would of respected me more. At this stage I don't consider myself a friend with her. you are right I want her p*ssy. hmm.. I will have to try exactly what you said the next time and see what sort of response I get.

Tell me something, have you ever done just that? and did it work?

I think there are two different types of DJ's on this board and I'm confused. the ones that just next and don't give a **** and the ones that enjoy the pursuit of women.

it is like the good and dark side of the force

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

I never give off the friend vibe!! I pursue with romantic intent only and women know this, it doesn't need to be communicated.

When you tell a woman you didn't ask for her number to become friends, you are still pursuing her but you are laying out the ground rules that it is not to be a 'friend'. If she objects to your advances then why waste your time and energy when it can be used for someone who has a higher interest in you!

Woman wouldn't tell a man she had interest in what she told you! Leave her alone - too much work for too little in return, if anything. She knows you are trying to move slowly (you suggested a 'friendly' coffee date) this is why she stated what she stated - you are not the first guy to try!

Good try though!

 

[00Kevin]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
I never give off the friend vibe!! I pursue with romantic intent only and women know this, it doesn't need to be communicated.

When you tell a woman you didn't ask for her number to become friends, you are still pursuing her but you are laying out the ground rules that it is not to be a 'friend'. If she objects to your advances then why waste your time and energy when it can be used for someone who has a higher interest in you!

Woman wouldn't tell a man she had interest in what she told you! Leave her alone - too much work for too little in return, if anything. She knows you are trying to move slowly (you suggested a 'friendly' coffee date) this is why she stated what she stated - you are not the first guy to try!

Good try though!

yeah.. well I figured she was a waste of my time when she told me that crap on the phone. girls like that are f--ked anyway.

so I'm just going to next her. forget the investment.

when she can't figure out why I don't want to be a friend to her anymore, I will tell her exactly what you said. Then she will feel like crap because she will think that I just showed up for that coffee to rub it in.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

I'm glad you woke up and smelled the coffee, as they say! If you ever talk to her again, just say "what man ever asked you for a date to become a friend only? Then say, "This is not the nature of a man!"