I have had it

[SayWhat]

You know me by now by my depressing threads, I don't know if this link works for you but if it does you can tell

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index.php?search/1302894/

Otherwise these two take the cake

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index.php?threads/i-give-up-on-myself.234703/#post-2346217
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index.php?threads/i-dont-like-who-i-am.235816/

Today I went out with my 'friends'. Are they my friends? I don't think so, some stuff has happened and I didn't want to tell them. We sat at a bar where for a couple of minutes no one said nothing. It has always been like this but it was terrible this night. I want other friends but I don't know where to begin (and yes I have hobbies and go to the gym but can't find them there either). I told them something funny which I told my colleagues at work at which they laughed, my friends on the other hand barely said something about it.

They're very depressing, they plak Pokemon all the f*cking time, they complain about not having a girlfriend,... I know the irony because I complain as well as not having a girlfriend, but I keep it to this forum.

My colleagues I don't like anymore either, they give these subtle 'stabs' and they think I don't get them, but I do. I don't blame them, I'm an introvert and I come across very arrogant, even though I don't mean it. But so it is

I truly believe I am going crazy, I was once a guy who just took life as it came, now I can't do it anymore. I have no one, besides my family, who truly cares about me and it drives me crazy. I come home from work and I don't like my colleagues anymore as I said before, but there is just no one anymore.

I know I just have to life by myself, but it's too hard. I want to sit with friends in the sun enjoying a good beer and talking about all the stuff we can think about.

Another thing I once posted in a previous thread. My friends go on holiday without me because I can't take a holiday on my work at this point but they can and they had the opportunity to go because they could go for free. Again, I don't blame them, but still, would TRUE friends go on a holiday without a true friend?

I am depressed and going crazy and it's not getting better. I don't know if it will ever turn around. I have gotten so many advice but it's all going wrong inside my head and I don't know how to turn it around. The only thing I like for the moment is looking forward to your guys responses. In a sense you guys are my friends, listening to my repetitive stories and giving advice, even though it's not getting better. Thanks anyway.

 

[CMNILS87]

I think a lot of people have boredom moreso than depression. You have this super low feeling of yourself. Why isn't anything happening like it should be? Why can't I do that? Why isn't this working out? People go through depression or boredom due to being out of control of certain things. I've had it multiple times and been to Dr's asking if it's depression or something else. They wanted to put me on meds, but I declined and found more things to do. Boredom and a feeling of not belonging can be just as caustic as depression

 

[dustmuffin]

Everyone has their cross to bear....Me.... My brother died, I got a divorce, lost my job and was unemployed for two years and I got dumped. I suffer from depression too. This happened in a short amount of time. Do I have friends? Not really....Do I want friends? Maybe...I really don't care. Im content with being alone. I do have female companionship on a regular basis. Point is I was in a bad place for a while. I had to pull myself up. I sought help. I contacted a doctor and was prescribed depression meds. I had to decide that life would not get the best of me. You have to decide that too. You must seek help and fix yourself. Don't wallow in self pity. No one cares about you , me or anyone else. Only you care about you and you have to take action to make yourself better.

I am one crazy son of a bi tch. But I learned to control my emotions. You can too.

 

[ubercat]

Mate y not join an mma class. When 120 kg guy is trying to mash your face into the mat trust me you won't be bored. Or join a team sport like soccer and play your guts out.

Have u tried either of those things? Men enjoy challenges that build them up. Notice I said enjoy. You've got to have things you enjoy every week otherwise life becomes a hard slog.

 

[Serenity]

You haven't had it before you take action, that's the point where you've had it and enough is enough. When you're so sick and tired you'll start doing anything to change it, when fears don't matter anymore because nothing can possibly be worse than your current situation.

I don't think you're there yet, prove me wrong though.

 

[hockeyfreak79]

Titty bars cheer me up. Keep trucking through it man. You can do it!

 

[Julian]

its only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything

- brad pitt...fight club

 

[dustmuffin]

What really helped me when I was acting irrational was a journal. I started it here on SS. You can pour all of your crazy thoughts into it. Venting in this way will make you feel better and clear your mind.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

I don't need anyone. Do I want people though? Yes I do, but I don't NEED them in my life to prevent me from going crazy. I don't NEED friends in my life to sit and talk to. I don't NEED women in my life to love and care about me. Is all that nice? Yes, it is, but I don't NEED it. Quite frankly I don't even know if I want someone to love me. Then they try to find your vulnerabilities sometimes and I've been through way too many situations where I've been backstabbed before. Maybe that's why? But regardless, you need to become more independent or find something else to do. Or just become more extroverted.

 

[MrOctober]

Mate y not join an mma class. When 120 kg guy is trying to mash your face into the mat trust me you won't be bored. Or join a team sport like soccer and play your guts out.

Have u tried either of those things? Men enjoy challenges that build them up. Notice I said enjoy. You've got to have things you enjoy every week otherwise life becomes a hard slog.

i agree with this. a team sport may be the answer.

 

[Epicwinguy]

Honestly I am in a similar situation to you buddy and simply having chats with coworkers and people I meet can ease it. MMA is a good idea but watch out! Martial arts is expensive and many instructors are also scam artists.

 

[ubercat]

Well personally I d look for a solid Goju karate dojo. Traditional enough to train the mind. Practical enough to be useful. And they ll let you use any technique in dojo sparring they don't restrict u to karate.

 

[sharkbeat]

I know I just have to life by myself, but it's too hard. I want to sit with friends in the sun enjoying a good beer and talking about all the stuff we can think about.

Why is it too hard? Live life the way you want it. Make new friends along the way.

 

[SayWhat]

Why is it too hard? Live life the way you want it. Make new friends along the way.

I want to see the world, to do this you need money. You have to work to earn money, currently I'm in some sort of training where holidays are planned for me, due to this I already missed 2 holidays with my friends. I made some trips this year, but they've been very small city trips, I like them, but I want some bigger holidays as well. This is eating me up as I missed these opportunities.

It will change in a few months, but still, sometimes I don't know if it's all worth it that I earn a decent amount of money but I miss out on some part of my social life.

 

[Konada]

I was very much in the same position as you, ****ty friends, didn't know where to start. My turning point came when I dumped all my gaming friends and started my circle anew. Did I potentially burn bridges? Yes. Do I regret it? No. Because those people were bad for my own emotional health anyway.

You are the average of your 5 closest friends, what people don't tell you is that us humans have a limited social capacity to interact on a deep level with people. As long as you keep toxic people in your life, your capacity to form quality bonds with new people becomes diminished.

Maybe you should try that, honestly I wouldn't have succeeded if I didn't burn my only ship back to safety. At that point is you either sink or swim.