I have a question,I'd like some feedback....

ItsOnNow

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So last week at work,they let us out an hour early,10 instead of 11,and it was cold and snowing. Some people needed a ride, and I offered them one. Now,this guy I work with,who has been a freind of my dad's,and has helped me out a few times at work,prevented me from getting fired cause I was in the break room too much,so anyways, he took me aside,and asked me,why am i giving them a ride? And I told them they need one,he asked,would they do the same for you? I said,yeah,I'm, pretty sure.

And he said to me,You're too kind hearted. He also goes on to say,what if there is an accident,one of them breaks there leg,and I get sued. He then went onto say the people here don't care about you,meaning everyone as a whole,not just me,and how his wife was in an accident,the guy who hit lied,and how he,my freind,not the guy that hit his wife,is going to be getting an ass kicking,and how anyone needs to look out for themselves,a view reinforced on the site.

He also went on how I,or anyone else,learned this from there mothers,to be good,kind,caring,etc. And what he said certainly got to me,in a good way. He said its the natural order of things,the mother raises the kid(s). Obviouisly,some of you see where I am going with this. Aside from the fact that no one likes a doormat,the whole "afc" thing. About how most guys raised by mom are afc's,and looking back on it,i probably spent more time with my mom than my dad. Why,I don't know. Looking back,I never asked either parent about how to handle women/girls,etc. And they probably are the best advice givers,yet I never listened. So,what do you think? I sometimes have this problem figuring where I stand as well.
 

Morphiex

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Well taking advice from parents can be helpfull , but taking advice literally would be disasterous. As parents usually tend to sugarcoat things most of the time.

although i agree that mommy mentality encourages you to be polite ,gentelmenly and everything nice. It does not necesarily mean that you will be a pushover or a doormat.

yes there are people that will not think twice before taking advantage of you , yes there are people who will fu|ck you over if they get a chance. But still do you want to become a person who will refuse to be helpfull or nice just because of the chance that they might fu|ck you over. always being sceptical abotu people and always thinking about the worse.

Truth is you can be nice and polite and still be able to watch your back from people who would want to take advantage of you.

I know im a very nice guy , i try to help out anyone not because i need anything from them but because if its possible that i can help them out without causing to much effort on my side i will do it. I would go through greater effort for only my closest friends. I just think what if it was me in that situation wouldnt it be nice if someone could help me out.

Of course there are some who will just take the help and then ignore your plead later on , then so what, just shows how sad person they are , but maby there will a person you help who will later on be helpful to you or someone else aswell because you showed a kindness to him/her that one time.

My point is being nice doesnt mean your an "AFC" (and i think people should stop using that term because its lost all its meaning over the past two years), Being nice is about having a stable and happy life to the extent that you wish to make others happy as well.

Being a pushover makes you an "AFC" , offering to help someone and being "ordered" to help is two waaaay different things.

hope this helped your question.
 

Bible_Belt

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The next time you need a ride, how would you rather it have been, that you helped everyone or you helped no one? Most people will return a favor. Not everyone will, but if you keep helping people, you will find that there are people helping you when you need it.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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