I hate people that suck my energy!

[Vice]

So whenever I'm in a really good, social mood, and I approach someone in a friendly manner and say hey or what's up or ask how they're doing, some people will just give me this stupid look and mumble or say nothing at all.

And some cashiers just stare at me and ask me what I want to order.

Man, it's frustrating. Maybe I need to try something else to break them out of their stagnant state? Or should I not even bother, seeing how I wouldn't want to deal with that kind of person again anyway?

 

[Cherokee]

Oh dude I know how you feel, whenever I'm on top social form there's always life drainers who don't wanna get on with anyone. Best thing to do is keep your chin up and keep trying until you meet sociable people. I've noticed recently that most groups of people tend to have one crazy ass person in it who loves to socialise and the rest are trying to dampen the fire.

 

[omega05]

i know what you mean too. sometimes when im in a cheery mood and say wassup, i hope they pick up on my positive energy and reciprocate but i guess they're just down or not in a talking mood so you get a low "hi"

 

[thecurtainfalls]

There are a lot of sourpuss grumps out there. They're doing you a favor by showing that they can't even be nice or open themselves up to interaction with a polite, well-groomed and non-threatening stranger.

 

[909pua]

Most of the time, those people that don't respond positively or socialize have low self esteem.

 

[Vice]

Yeah, I figured there'd be something wrong with them.

Regardless, they still leech my energy. Now I know how some women feel!

But at least this site has TONS of motivational stuff that gets me more than fired up

 

[seagull]

I used to be like that. If you walk up to a cashier don't say anything to them. Wait for them to say "hello" first and if they are nice, then you can be friendly. If they say nothing, don't say anything at all. Not even "thank you". That way you're not wasting your energy on them, and giving them the respect they deserve.

 

[Soprano]

i know what you mean, but dont let them effect you!

 

[slaog]

i know what you mean, but dont let them effect you!

You need to have a stronger frame. If somebody who you percieve as being lower value then you ignored you it would matter less to you then if a person who you perceive as being higher value done it to you.


I was buying something in a shop last week with my girlfriend. There was a cashier there who didn't look at me, had a really angry face and mumbled everything she said. I paid for the things I was buying and said a big hello and thank you. As we were walking away my girlfriend commented about her behaviour and I just laughed it off. It had zero effect on me but one time it would have effected me negatively.


Heres the thing though. I did feel sorry for that girl because she was not a happy person. She looked miserable. So, if a person is ignorant or rude or have any other negative behaviour then its really a matter of pittying them. They should not effect you in the slightest.

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

Every obnoxious act is a cry for help.

 

[Da Realist]

Let's be real: just because you're having a great day doesn't mean the other person is. You may be all sunshines and lollypops at that time, but the other person may be stuck at a dead end job having to stare at all the happy people who make them wish they had taken up being a mortician like their mom told them to a long time ago.

What should you do? Just smile and go about your way. You're human just as they are and you can't force someone to smile back at you. You keep your head high though and something good will come your way. But the key is to not stop being who you are despite what people project.

 

[DonGorgon]

Most people are disgruntled with life these days and only act cool wen they are high on their drug of choice and or alcahol.

 

[Cherokee]

Most people are disgruntled with life these days and only act cool wen they are high on their drug of choice and or alcahol.

this is sadly true. Unfortunately, living in the UK ive noticed that most guys cant even talk to a girl unless they're drunk. It gives them the excuse. And it also gives girls an excuse to act like sl*gs. I dunno, but this booze culture is crap, our social structure has fallen to sh*t because of it.

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

It's always been a booze and drug orgy, everywhere. How better to silence those questioning voices?

 

[thecurtainfalls]

It's always been a booze and drug orgy, everywhere. How better to silence those questioning voices?

DING DING DING. You guys think this is new?? It's been like this for at least the last 2000 years, if not more. The aesthetics change, but the song remains the same.

 

[Nexus Polaris]

The best way to connect with somebody is to match their energy level (but not their mood).

In other words, if somebody is doing their best Eeyore impression and you go in all happy and boisterous, you shouldn't expect a positive response. They're likely going to want to stab you because they can't relate to what you're feeling and your enthusiasm is only feeding their misery.

However, if you keep your happy/pleasant mood but lower your energy level to match theirs (i.e. more mellow), it's usually not that hard to pull them out of their shell. Because you haven't tried to yank them out of their comfort zone, they feel like you understand them better. And what you leave them with is something that brightened their day. They'll remember that one bright moment where somebody took the time to communicate with them on their level and made them smile while everybody else was bouncing around like a bunch of oblivious manic idiots.

It works the same the other way around. Even if you're in a good mood, if you go into a situation with a low energy level and the other person is loud, active, and hyper, you're not going to be able to connect with them very well. Usually you won't even get their attention.

But if you've done all this and someone is still hell bent on being sour, just shrug it off and go about your business. It's no big deal.

 

[Vice]

Most people are disgruntled with life these days and only act cool wen they are high on their drug of choice and or alcahol.

That just caused a paradigm shift when it comes to "party people".

They're just using those things to make up for where they fall short socially...