I got played

[Johnny_Kage]

I agree with Thatmysteriousguy. I don't think this guy was trying to screw you over or anything. After all, he did sit by you in the hospital and put a lot of time into you. He could have just been out looking for other girls if all he wanted was a one night stand. He probably just doesn't know what to do and he's handling the situation poorly. Don't beat yourself up about it. And, for the love of God, don't take it out on the next guy.

JK

 

[Just a Shot Away]

yeah i dont understand the necessity to refer to Ramadan here either. but hey im here too so what do i know.

It's a form of credibility reinforcement. Ever hear of the Patterson-Gimlin Bigfoot film? It shows a tall, primate-like figure lumbering through the forest past the camera, and then disappearing into the trees. Defenders of the authenticity of the film will point out that the figure has breasts, and there is a hernia on the right leg. Since both of these features would require excellent foresight to fake via costume (going against the prevalent assumption that a "bigfoot" is a male creature), they are arguments for the film's authenticity.


Same thing here. When a guy mentions a seemingly innocuous detail with their female character on the Internet, it helps to solidify the idea that the person behind the character is in fact a female. "Ramadan?? Why would a guy trolling SoSuave for laughs pretend to be a MUSLIM, of all things? This is surely an HB!" And it has apparently worked, judging by the fact that nearly all of this poster's threads receive multiple pages of responses. And yes, I realize this is not a popular view but hey...Occam's razor always wins out in the end.

 

[shortie]

It's a form of credibility reinforcement. Ever hear of the Patterson-Gimlin Bigfoot film? It shows a tall, primate-like figure lumbering through the forest past the camera, and then disappearing into the trees. Defenders of the authenticity of the film will point out that the figure has breasts, and there is a hernia on the right leg. Since both of these features would require excellent foresight to fake via costume (going against the prevalent assumption that a "bigfoot" is a male creature), they are arguments for the film's authenticity.


Same thing here. When a guy mentions a seemingly innocuous detail with their female character on the Internet, it helps to solidify the idea that the person behind the character is in fact a female. "Ramadan?? Why would a guy trolling SoSuave for laughs pretend to be a MUSLIM, of all things? This is surely an HB!" And it has apparently worked, judging by the fact that nearly all of this poster's threads receive multiple pages of responses. And yes, I realize this is not a popular view but hey...Occam's razor always wins out in the end.

hmm interesting analysis, you are probably right. i didnt see the other posts from the user but i get what you are saying.

 

[Erik V]

I hope you are well after your hospital stay, Cinamon!

Sounds like you could be right about this guy: he knew your interest was low, and so when he finally got sex he decided to end it with that. You shouldn't have sex with a guy because you feel you owe him something; have sex when you feel like it. Or when he makes you feel like it.

And that is crappy comments from him in bed. Really.

Oh well. You live and learn. If there are no other effects from this, then I guess just go on to new days in your life, now with one more experience.

 

[ThatMysteriousGuy]

hmm interesting analysis, you are probably right. i didnt see the other posts from the user but i get what you are saying.

Didn't they have Critical Thinking classes at your school?

Let me have a shot with what he said but just a few words changed:

"Same thing here. When a guy mentions a seemingly innocuous detail with their male character on the Internet, it helps to solidify the idea that the person behind the character is in fact a male. "HBs?? Why would a woman trolling SoSuave for laughs pretend to be a Woman Liker, of all things? This is surely a Dude!" And it has apparently worked, judging by the fact that nearly all of this poster's threads receive multiple pages of responses. And yes, I realize this is not a popular view but hey...Occam's razor always wins out in the end.

So, I have just "proved" that everyone here is a woman except for Cinamon by just changing gender in the text.

I think (and hope) that bolded part was his not-so-subtle clue as to what he (or she?!?!) was up to. 10/10 if it was.

 

[Just a Shot Away]

I think (and hope) that bolded part was his not-so-subtle clue as to what he (or she?!?!) was up to. 10/10 if it was.

Mmmm....kind of, not really. I was basically saying that it's exponentially more likely that a dude (likely anti-seduction) is pretending to be a chick on the Internet for kicks than an actual chick going on a forum for men designed to help other guys conquer their own gender for help on "catching him and keeping him." This is just common sense. I wasn't trying to be cryptic...just pointing out the obvious.

 

[Perfect]

Interesting story. Very common one, but interesting nonetheless. So you felt like you "owed" him something, so you put out? Mhmmm...


Lol @ dudes typing up paragraphs of advice for women as if they are logical creatures.

 

[fertileTurtle]

I always call the next day and see how long it will last. He's a jerk.

 

[Warrior74]

He's a jerk.

Very telling.

As a rule, you always call the next day, unless you don't give a sh1t about her and wouldn't care to fvck her again. Of course I like to wait until late the next evening to call. Gotta make em sweat a bit.

 

[fertileTurtle]

Very telling.

As a rule, you always call the next day, unless you don't give a sh1t about her and wouldn't care to fvck her again. Of course I like to wait until late the next evening to call. Gotta make em sweat a bit.

No, you are right.

 

[Nutz]

PS: Guys, this is why you HAVE to call a girl the next day after first sex when dating. If you do not, she's going to be like this and putting everything under a microscope and looking for reasons to not like you and protect herself. Almost all of them automatically do this, it's built-in. If he had have called, and just said "hi, blah blah, got stuff to do, call ya *smack*" for 2 minutes this thread wouldn't even be here. Some guys are also under the impression this shows you're not needy and it builds attraction, NO IT DOES NOT IN THIS TYPE OF SITUATION. She'll likely be crying and angry and feeling stupid and used while she's lying there in bed trying to go to sleep.

No way, that's exactly what you want her doing. The goal should be to get her thinking about you, investing time thinking about you, and in general heaping value on your contacting her. The goal is to get women fretting and investing like the OP is doing. It was only 4 days between sex to her post. 4 days! Maybe he should have called already to prevent her perception from sliding into the negative, but calling the very next day is premature. If he called her 2 minutes after posting this and explained his grandma was sick and he flew to Florida, sorry for not getting in touch, yada yada yada, (or whatever other excuse women use when they flake--he was just flipping the script) she'd be right back in the saddle ready for round 2.

You think cinamon would have made this thread if he hadn't disappeared for a few days?

You think she would be thinking about him at all?

Nope. He would be the needy guy that was very sweet and visited in hospital, whom she slept with because she felt she owed him something, but it didnt work out and they weren't meant to be. LJBF

Attraction will intensify when she wants a deep connection with you and wants to feel special together, like in a relationship. In this situation she had low interest already and she knows this guy isn't the man of her dreams because he already failed all the **** tests. When in doubt, use assh*le-game.

Exactly.

 

[jophil28]

I just feel so stupid I didn't see this coming. I still have so much to learn.

Indeed you do, but mostly about reciprocity.

Essentially, when you first dated him, you were indifferent to him and told him that if he found someone else, that you and he would part company. So he heard in that that you had low IL, and that you could care less about him, right ? Then he attended to you while you were all broken in the hospital .
He then cooked you dinner and you had sex with him because you WANTED to. I say that because nobody forced you to go to his place for dinner and nobody forced you to get naked - those were your choices. And you made those choices with a guy who knew how little you felt for him, and you made those same choices knowing that YOU felt little for him.

You were quite willing to accept his attentiveness when you had a medical problem, and you were quite willing to accept a free meal . All the benefits were headed your way at this point

Then you made a choice to fvck him, and now you are whining because he is putting distance between you. Hey, didn't you tell him that you and he would probably not get together a few months ago - you pushed him away and kept him at a distance until you had a need (the hospital) and then you accepted his attentions.

You are pissed because he finally got what he wanted and you lost ownership of CONTROL over him. He flipped the script on you and you are angry because, like most women, you feel somehow entitled to CONTROL relationships with men. Well, honey you don't - he just demonstrated that.

 

[dalynxx]

This is sad to read Cinamon. You shouldn't have slept with him at all since you weren't really interested. He hasn't called, but it seems that you played a game and got burned. Hopefully this is a learning experience for you.

 

[shortie]

does anyone else realize that Cinamon has not come back after the initial post to comment or say anything for that matter, and still everyone is writing up paragraphs of analysis and advice for him/her.

 

[Alle_Gory]

does anyone else realize that Cinamon has not come back after the initial post to comment or say anything for that matter, and still everyone is writing up paragraphs of analysis and advice for him/her.

...because she's here only for attention.

 

[jophil28]

...because she's here only for attention.

AND perhaps she did not reply because she didn't receive the gush of sympathy that she wanted .

 

[Jitterbug]

To add to jophil28's analysis above, it's funny how women give no consideration to a man doing her many favours (like that guy taking care of her when she's sick, cooking her dinner etc.) yet she makes it seem like he owes her the bloody world if she has sex with him, when it actually is a mutually enjoyable act.

Lesson to be learned from this, kids: don't do nice things for women. They are not appreciated.

 

[Just a Shot Away]

does anyone else realize that Cinamon has not come back after the initial post to comment or say anything for that matter, and still everyone is writing up paragraphs of analysis and advice for him/her.

You know now that you mention it...

 

[Alle_Gory]

AND perhaps she did not reply because she didn't receive the gush of sympathy that she wanted .

She's probably crying over a tub of ice cream right now because she's such an idiot. She got sex, a nice meal, and attention for months from the guy and all she had to do was lay on her back for 30min and enjoy it. What a tragedy that she had to do a small favor for HIM... and she still get something out of it.

Boo hoo Cinamon. Get a life. How about you be grateful that a decent guy did this for you because most of us here sure couldn't stand you for more than a week.

Lesson to be learned from this, kids: don't do nice things for women. They are not appreciated.

That's a little too far. There's some women that appreciate. Cinamon is not one of them, she probably still thinks she's hot stuff which is where all this ME ME ME crap comes from.

Can't wait until the day she realizes that her looks have expired (almost there hon, you're 31) and she has to actually do something like be decent for guys to stick around.

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

Oh hell she's already riding another guy and this crap is old news.

I wonder if he played with her butt too, and that's why her feathers got all ruffled...