I got issues I think, of course its about a girl

[christz]

Long story short

met this girl at my job, i was immideatly intrested in her, so i decided to talk to her after work one night we were in the parking lot for 3 hours until 1 in the morning just talking about everything and nothing, she tells me she broke up with her b/f of 3 years about a year go. i'm like coolness we clicked instantly.

i made her laugh constantly with my sarcastic humor and witty comments

fast foward

about 2 months we were talking for hours on the phoe makeing plans meeting plans i took her to ceder point and that was our first real date, which didn't start as one but turned into one.. before i knew it she was holding my hand pulling me onto the ferris wheel etc..

fast foward

now its been three weeks since then. we've been "talking" for about 3 months now.. so this change in attitude has recently come up. anyway now it seems she's not really withdrawn rather than confused.

thing is.. is i think i was a rebound, however i don't think she anticipated getting any type of feelings for me, how do i know this? She was at my place and her e/x boyfriend was blowing her cell phone up in fact he overloaded her phone with txt messages.

it was then i said, how long you say again? she's like only 2 months. GREAT i'm a rebound she instantly jumped all over that and said your not because if you we wouldn't hang out go on dates we would have just had sex once or twice and that woulda been it.

Made sense so i agreed.. since that night actually i've noticed she flakes a lot more now.. however anytime i say if your flakeing for ryan then tell me, she says n fact she argues the point of WHY they aren't going out and they're just friends.. BS i told her no guy can just BE FRIENDS after breaking up from a 3yr relationship.

Now Normally this would mean she's useing me however she calls me baby when were together however rare that is now recently, she says she cares we kiss make out, if she does flake on me she offers up a new date in fact she even ask about certian dates and if she has plans with her NORMAL friends she asks if i wanna come. on top of the fact that she buys me ****, she even wanted some pictures of me which i gave her and now she has them in her car visor. (WTF u know?)

now all point taken somebody tell me what's up if they have an idea. Because my idea is this.

At first i was probably just a rebound but by accident she happend to develop pretty strong feelings for me that she never wanted there in the first place. now Ryan her ex is attempting to get back with her after the bazillionth time of them breaking up. she lies to me about hanging with him at nights and ONLY at nights do they hang out. i think she tried to come outta the closet with it once two days ago, but i got pissed.

since then i haven't heard anything about it, i don't think she wants me to stop talking to her because she's trying to work **** out in her head who she wants the most, she doesn't want a relatioship now but sometimes it slips and she says whe- IF we start dateing were gonna do this, this and this

So what's up guys?! should i just be a good friend to her until she decides what's up, call her less frequently but still be there for her? its so weird because i can tell she's so irritated when she talks to me at night about something.. but basiclly her ex is over at her house EVERY SINGLE night. and she told me when we were talking constantly that, that's what she hated she felt sufocated.

i want her to be happy, and i know she's not.. and yet i can do nothing but sit and wait this out.. help me out what do you think?

 

[flexion_]

-----
"we were talking for hours on the phoNe..."
-----
BAD - VERY VERY BAD - don't do that!

-----
"but basiclly her ex is over at her house EVERY SINGLE night".
-----
Are you having sex with her? If not, why do you want part of this drama?

This advice won't make any sense at the moment - someday hopefully it will - Read the DJ Bible.

 

[Barbillus]

Have you hooked up with her?

If the answer is no then you are in the friends zone. Should have made your move real early on.

Live. learn. Move on to the next one.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by christz
Long story short

No...more like "long story maybe a little less long"

At first i was probably just a rebound but by accident she happend to develop pretty strong feelings for me that she never wanted there in the first place. now Ryan her ex is attempting to get back with her after the bazillionth time of them breaking up. she lies to me about hanging with him at nights and ONLY at nights do they hang out. i think she tried to come outta the closet with it once two days ago, but i got pissed.

since then i haven't heard anything about it, i don't think she wants me to stop talking to her because she's trying to work **** out in her head who she wants the most, she doesn't want a relatioship now but sometimes it slips and she says whe- IF we start dateing were gonna do this, this and this

So what's up guys?! should i just be a good friend to her until she decides what's up, call her less frequently but still be there for her? its so weird because i can tell she's so irritated when she talks to me at night about something.. but basiclly her ex is over at her house EVERY SINGLE night. and she told me when we were talking constantly that, that's what she hated she felt sufocated.

i want her to be happy, and i know she's not.. and yet i can do nothing but sit and wait this out.. help me out what do you think?

So STOP SUFFOCATING HER!!

Jeez, man! Stop being a little b!tch. If you REALLY think she's cheating on you with her ex, then BREAK UP with her. If it bugs you that much that she can't tell him NO in a firm and direct manner, then BREAK UP with her.

If you think she's really NOT and they really are just friends, STOP being an insecure little nutball and harassing her about it 24/7. Think about it...if you had an ex-girl who still liked you but you just wanted to hang around with as a friend, would you want a girlfriend who nagged you 24/7 about seeing her??

And if she's already told him to get lost in no uncertain terms and he's still hanging around, that's called HARASSMENT and either she should get a restraining order or you should kick his ass.

Grow up. No woman is worth this kind of stress. Either dump her or get over it. Whichever YOU want to do.

 

[christz]

First off i don't nag that she talks to him, in fact i say you don't gotta keep it a secret i don't care if you talk to ryan or not, you guys are friends and that's how it should be.

second, yes.. yes i have hooked up with her on more than one occasion in fact she actually broke plans with ryan on holloween and came to a party with me downtown in which she actually iniated the sex that i rejected because there was no place to go. she wanted to just get screwed from the back against a car.

so yeah I have had sex with her, yes we do make out yes we kiss, we hold hands we do all that stuff when we are together

BUT NO we are not dateing.. so there is nothing to break up with, we are talking.. with the future plans of dateing needless to say her attitude is weird.. so i'll play it cool unless somebody else has other advice.

 

[NewMan]

Your emotionally to involved.

***
she tells me she broke up with her b/f of 3 years about a year go.
***

RED FLAG...

It's been a year and she's already told you about it.... That means she still has feelings for him...

RED FLAG.

***
about 2 months we were talking for hours on the phoe makeing plans meeting plans i took her to ceder point and that was our first real date, which didn't start as one but turned into one.. before i knew it she was holding my hand pulling me onto the ferris wheel etc..

fast foward

now its been three weeks since then. we've been "talking" for about 3 months now.. so this change in attitude has recently come up. anyway now it seems she's not really withdrawn rather than confused.

thing is.. is i think i was a rebound, however i don't think she anticipated getting any type of feelings for me, how do i know this? She was at my place and her e/x boyfriend was blowing her cell phone up in fact he overloaded her phone with txt messages.

it was then i said, how long you say again? she's like only 2 months.
****

So she lied to you.

Initially she told you she'd broken up with him a year ago.

No 3 months into it with YOU - she tells you 2 months?





Bottom line.

Your emotionally involved.

You've got to pull way back.

Enjoy going out with her. Enjoy fvcking her (and if your not fvcking her move on NOW).

Don't even stress about the ex. Let he deal. Whatever she's doing she's doing - just fvck her.

Now - in the meantime - get yourself some other women.

Don't be readily available - she's not. So you shouldn't.

Go out and "Hang out" with your "Girl friends". wink, wink. If you don't have any - make some up.

The point is - whatever is happening with this girl - let her deal with it. You just should have fun with her, when your with her - and fvck her as much as you can.

don't be her b#tch and talk for hrs with her. Go out have fun - and bang her. Then withdraw.

Your to readily available.

 

[christz]

so wait.. your saying in order to keep this together and work through it i gotta **** her? lol i have had sex with her and she loved it, but like i've always stopped short, i want to **** her again but the oppertunities are so far and few between.

if your saying i gotta **** her to keep it together then i'll make a move everytime i'm with her..

how many times should i have had sex with her before all this stuff started poppin off? lol once twice? or is once more than enough because she wants to have sex with me again its slipped out more than once on the phone

 

[strong like bull]

basically, you need to be doing a lot more ****ing and a lot less talking.

youve also invested way too much emotion into the situation. thats why your racking your brain over this silly girl. since when does a woman decide whether youre happy or not?

when you choose to let a girl enter your world, it should be for the pleasure of it. a gift, from you to her, that lifts her off her feet and sweeps her away from all of her boredom, troubles, pain, and sorrow. it should be filled with mutual excitement, happiness and deeply fullfilling, passionate lust.

not unneeded drama. not bull****. not lies about ex boyfriends.

newman is on the mark. dont waste your energy on a lieing, attention-starved drama queen. use her for sex, because evidently she isnt the sweet, wholesome girl youd want to bring home to momma. on top of that, start seeing and ****ing other girls because it'll put you back into the proper frame of mind - MOST WOMEN ARE A DIME A DOZEN. IF YOU KICK ASIDE ONE BECAUSE SHES BEING A SILLY GOOSE, A THOUSAND MORE ARE WALKING AROUND YOUR CITY RIGHT NOW WAITING FOR A MAN TO SWEEP THEM OFF THEIR FEET.

-SLB

 

[christz]

i dunno to me this girl meets qualities i look for in a girl, for one she's just like me sarcastic funny and a whole lot more not to mention hott as fuk

on top of that, she admits to me because its slipped, that unlike her ex ryan i clicked with her instantly. which is defenitly good, i know actions speak louder than words. But i feel if i hang in there and be a good friend but always keep it on a level where we're still hookin up and having fun together than eventully things will change for the better

on another note, i have been having sex with other girls, friends of mine in fact i just called a friend jessica because i been meaning to see that again. although when the dirty deed is done i'm left un satisfied, and bored to me i'd much rather **** the **** outta my girlfriend than some friend of mine.

its just that much more better, not to mention these other girls don't even excite me mentally or peak my intrest at all.

She might be going through some drama in her head, but the intrest is ther.. with the constant glanceing, hand holding, kissing, planing, dates and the occasional screw.

if she really didn't want me in her life, she'd flake me not only in planning but over the phone as well until i finally got the hint. always makeing excuses. You don't ask for pictures of people you don't like. i know i never have that was the biggest sign that she's catching some feelings

 

[christz]

bump for a few more opinions

 

[NewMan]

***
i dunno to me this girl meets qualities i look for in a girl,
***

Which quality is that? the one where she lies to you about the fact that she dumped her Ex 1 yr ago when in fact she was still dating him?

Hmmm....

**
on top of that, she admits to me because its slipped, that unlike her ex ryan i clicked with her instantly
**

Meaning - you sat there for 3 hrs and listen to her b#tch about her ex in the parking lot - when you should have just said - hey let's got get a drink....

Don't confuse being an emotional tampon for a chick with her getting her panties wet over you.

Your the former.

You see the problem is your trying to suck up to her...


**
But i feel if i hang in there and be a good friend
**

Remeber YOUR THE PRIZE....

When I said you should bang her - I didn't mean you should do that to GET HER.... I told you to do that because your acting like her GF.

Forget the talking and the emotional BS...

 

[KingPinp]

Okay this kid is seventeen. i would say **** her, but dont get to attached, its not a big deal. learn from your mistakes, apply improved tactics elsewhere.

 

[christz]

nah in the parking lot we talked about everything and nothing, her ex b/f never comes up at all really even still AND i asked her why she lied about it, and she said i didn't know you then and i was scared if i told you how long we really been broken up, you wouldn't want to talk to me at all.

its really confuseing to know if i'm getting strung along. and confronting her and giving her an ulimatium is never a good idea.

anytime we talk, its always about bull**** because that's the kinda chick she is the kinda girl you can talk to about anything with.. like some insane topic about how clouds are shaped **** like that.

its one thing if this girl was flakeing out at every possible minute but like she gives me an inch and takes an inch back.. like she's scared to move into me and its pissing me off.. I don't think about it but when it happens i get pissed and then i think about it.

i understand there are girls out there but understand that i've been dateing around for a year and a half and NO GIRL has ever clicked with me like this..

all the other ones seem to get boreing, they don't conversate phone chats are composed of "what's up" "oh cool" that's not indulgeing my senses!

she does.. that's why i feel she's worth the time, i don't want to get strung along though and assumeing i am i'll end it accordingly until she's made up her mind.. but the actions and signs of being strung along are not what she exibits

also understand i am talking to other girls but they mean almost nothing to me in fact sex is a chore if i do have sex with them.. i'd get more satisfaction just jacking off on top of them.

I dunno, its not like i got oneitis but its not like i don't either. I would get up in her face about the thought of me being strung along but that will only hurt me.. so i won't i guess i'm just going along for the ride until it stops. as much as i don't like it.

Oh and at the movies i'm a terrible horror movie watcher, she wanted me to go see a movie "the grudge" with her friends so i went, and i'm all covering my eyes LOL.. she's like "baby what's wrong, hold my hand" i'm like WTF in my head! if i act mad or ignore her i get an almost instant reaction. not to mention at the end of the night she's like give me a kiss

she can even tell when there's something wrong about me.. this is just straight retarded how this is going. ON ANOTHER NOTE.. I'm 22 and she's 21 So that throws out the childishness of it all on that respect

 

[Pugsley_f5]

The Best thing you can do to possibly right things is to cut off all contact with her , and I mean ALL, and watch her come to you.

 

[christz]

Originally posted by Pugsley_f5
The Best thing you can do to possibly right things is to cut off all contact with her , and I mean ALL, and watch her come to you.

that's what i'm doing, actually the fact that her ex is at her house constantly helps me out because while i'm cool and reserved he's sweatin her 24/7 he'll help me in the long run as she'll get tired of his shyt no time flat

although i do feel bad because i saw her today and she looked bothered with the fact i didnt' call her but she's so headstrong she'll never say to much just enough