I got flaked on.........and its no big deal

Glassguy

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Here is why it should be no big deal if and when a woman flakes, cancels, etc:

We as men should act like men. Initiate the conversation early on, show interest and set up the date. Feminine women will follow our lead if they have high interest.

Women will also act like women women. They are finicky, emotional and highly unpredictable. They love attention....never forget that. The key is to not give them free attention. Seduce. Dont get mad or hateful at the world because a woman acts like they do in this day and age.

At the end of the day, I dont care what people say, if you initiate enough dates you will run into a flake now and then. How you handle it is the only thing you can control.

This past week a chick reached out on snapchat. I posted a pic, she responded to it. She also reminded me that we "never got that drink" that we talked about 1.5 yrs ago. Back then we talked about grabbing a drink. Long story short, it ended up being more chit chat than planning to get together and I bounced. More work than it seemed to be worth. She is either 25 or 26 years old, 5'7 and very attractive. Grad degree in education (she is a teacher).

So anyways, I took the bait on the "we never got together for that drink". So I responded back with:
Me: Well thats a bummer. At least we tried a year ago
Her: We tried? Thats it?
Me: Maybe we will have to make up that drink offer soon
Her: Where would you take me?
Me: Either such and such place or my house......no driving that way
Her: Well I am not the stay over type if that is what you're referring to....maybe this is why we didnt get that drink before
Me: I wasnt referring to come over for a booty call.
Her: Well it would be cool if you took me out on a real date
Me: I am going to such and such place Saturday evening. They have live music at 9. Let me know if you can get free
Her: Ok sounds good. I should be able to go Saturday evening.
Me: See you then

Saturday:
Me: How does 8pm work?
She didnt respond back.

Last night:
Her: Hey I'm sorry. Got tied up with my sister's wedding shower all weekend

This morning:
Me: No worries. I am beginning to think I know the answer to why we never grabbed that drink in the first place
Her: Why is that
Me: Because you are flaky and I dont mess with flaky chicks. We can still be friends when I see you at the gym though.
Her- No response

Thats it. I didnt get a response back although she read it this morning. And that will be the end of it.

You guys need to understand that you cant control other people's decisions, emotions or outcomes based on other people's actions. It is what it is.

What you can control is how you react to other people's actions.

Always always always stay cool and never show a reaction. My experience has taught me that you will never bang a chick after a flake if you show a poor reaction. Ever. As in 0% conversion rate.

My experience has shown me that handling it in a care free way may draw their attention to you when you pull back.

My experience has definitely taught me that I really dont care either way, there are many more women around the next corner.

Its imperative that you handle yourself with total control and not let these chicks get under your skin. That alone will leave a bad taste in your mouth and make you a jaded individual and burn yourself out on chicks altogether.
 

Robert28

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I wouldn’t have bother responding after the wedding excuse she gave. I had one girl use her kid as an excuse to flake before. Why’s that so funny? Because she didn’t realize she’s used the same “my kid is sick” excuse the time before. I wanted to say “you sure do have a sickly kid, you should get it vaccinated” lol
 

EyeBRollin

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Flakes are completely unacceptable. One flake, she’s out forever.

The only exception is if I physically have never met the girl before. That means first dates from chicks online. That is a complete hit or miss so I may or may not excuse it depending on availability of the other chicks in rotation.
 

Glassguy

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I have a system that I follow if a chick flakes or cancels without a specific counter offer.

If they reach back out I will simply invite them over to have a drink or chill at my place. Its either a yes or no at that point. If not a yes, I will not respond anymore to their little "Hey" texts in the future.
 

fanatic22

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I have a system that I follow if a chick flakes or cancels without a specific counter offer.

If they reach back out I will simply invite them over to have a drink or chill at my place. Its either a yes or no at that point. If not a yes, I will not respond anymore to their little "Hey" texts in the future.
Yep, one flake and it’s Netflix and chill until I’m convinced it won’t happen again. Saves me a ton of headache.
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Spaz

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I just don't get why some men are upset being flaked on.

This shiet happens both ways too.

Sometimes I flake but it's unavoidable at the last moment due to work or some other pressing matter.

Women obviously has more "right" to be upset when they got flaked on as they've got more invested into a date - buying a new dress, make up, new shoes, peer pressure and a whole ton of shiet show that men don't go through.

And if I'm being flaked on, which I do experience, it's no big deal, I'll whip out my phone and send off a message that drinks is on me at so and so pub....I guarantee you, ur buddies will make time and be early.
 

Mazer

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A lot of guys hate when women flake on them, myself included but the funny thing is the same women who flake on guys also flake on their female friends. I know a few women who all have “flakey” friends. Can’t count on them to show up to anything they tell me. It’s usually the really hot ones. These people have no integrity and should be dealt with accordingly.
 

mrgoodstuff

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A lot of guys hate when women flake on them, myself included but the funny thing is the same women who flake on guys also flake on their female friends. I know a few women who all have “flakey” friends. Can’t count on them to show up to anything they tell me. It’s usually the really hot ones. These people have no integrity and should be dealt with accordingly.
Yea they do flake on their friends.
 

B0redandl0nely

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Here is why it should be no big deal if and when a woman flakes, cancels, etc:

We as men should act like men. Initiate the conversation early on, show interest and set up the date. Feminine women will follow our lead if they have high interest.

Women will also act like women women. They are finicky, emotional and highly unpredictable. They love attention....never forget that. The key is to not give them free attention. Seduce. Dont get mad or hateful at the world because a woman acts like they do in this day and age.

At the end of the day, I dont care what people say, if you initiate enough dates you will run into a flake now and then. How you handle it is the only thing you can control.

This past week a chick reached out on snapchat. I posted a pic, she responded to it. She also reminded me that we "never got that drink" that we talked about 1.5 yrs ago. Back then we talked about grabbing a drink. Long story short, it ended up being more chit chat than planning to get together and I bounced. More work than it seemed to be worth. She is either 25 or 26 years old, 5'7 and very attractive. Grad degree in education (she is a teacher).

So anyways, I took the bait on the "we never got together for that drink". So I responded back with:
Me: Well thats a bummer. At least we tried a year ago
Her: We tried? Thats it?
Me: Maybe we will have to make up that drink offer soon
Her: Where would you take me?
Me: Either such and such place or my house......no driving that way
Her: Well I am not the stay over type if that is what you're referring to....maybe this is why we didnt get that drink before
Me: I wasnt referring to come over for a booty call.
Her: Well it would be cool if you took me out on a real date
Me: I am going to such and such place Saturday evening. They have live music at 9. Let me know if you can get free
Her: Ok sounds good. I should be able to go Saturday evening.
Me: See you then

Saturday:
Me: How does 8pm work?
She didnt respond back.

Last night:
Her: Hey I'm sorry. Got tied up with my sister's wedding shower all weekend

This morning:
Me: No worries. I am beginning to think I know the answer to why we never grabbed that drink in the first place
Her: Why is that
Me: Because you are flaky and I dont mess with flaky chicks. We can still be friends when I see you at the gym though.
Her- No response

Thats it. I didnt get a response back although she read it this morning. And that will be the end of it.

You guys need to understand that you cant control other people's decisions, emotions or outcomes based on other people's actions. It is what it is.

What you can control is how you react to other people's actions.

Always always always stay cool and never show a reaction. My experience has taught me that you will never bang a chick after a flake if you show a poor reaction. Ever. As in 0% conversion rate.

My experience has shown me that handling it in a care free way may draw their attention to you when you pull back.

My experience has definitely taught me that I really dont care either way, there are many more women around the next corner.

Its imperative that you handle yourself with total control and not let these chicks get under your skin. That alone will leave a bad taste in your mouth and make you a jaded individual and burn yourself out on chicks altogether.
Losers fail to make emotional connections with women.If a woman flakes on you, it's cause you're a loser. Women don't flake on winners. A winner can get any woman he wants.
 

stovepipe

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So the moral of the story is......If you never have expectations to begin with you can't get let down. Once you can get to a point in your life where nothing bothers you anymore you live a happier less stressful life.

I personally wouldn't have responded back. I do however like the way you threw it back in her face. You planted the seed in her mind that she is in fact a flake. That you also dont care to have a drink with her again. Most guys would be afraid of losing the possibility of having that drink and end up kissing her a$s which is a no no. Makes you look soft, sensitive and too nice.
 

If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

B0redandl0nely

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It doesn't matter how you respond to a flake cause a flake means you lose b1tch
 

B0redandl0nely

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You're probably the dumbest poster here. Congrats.

I have a current 4 chick rotation. Flakes can happen to anyone. But thanks for showing us (again) how clueless you are. No wonder you struggle with chicks.
Dumbest poster here? I'm taking upper level science courses and I'm doing very well with them. I get my bachelor's in spring 2020 and then I'm off to grad school. Yeah I'm really stupid, fvck do you do? I tell it like it is. I'm tired of this "handle it like a man" bullsh1t cause it makes no difference. I don't like losing particular girls and I believe I have a right to be fvcking pissed off about it. I don't subscribe to the mindset you're promoting
 

guru1000

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The weight of a flake is relative to your abundance.

My date nights are usually Friday through Sunday. For each night I’m not with a girl I already know, I’ll book double- and triple headers. So here, flakes serve me well and I thank them sincerely as they helped narrow my choice for the night.

Now let’s take this past Sunday where I only booked one date. She flakes. But I’m in the mood ... So I go to my Bumble/Tinder matches and shoot out 10 emails “hi, up to meet for a drink at 8pm” Boom, three agree. In the past, depending on my energy level, I’d see all three in time slots or even at the same time, but these days Im lazy and so narrow down to one and raincheck the remaining.

So flaking for me is a convenience or forces me to use my matches before they expire. And so I’m thankful to those women who make it easy for me.
 

zekko

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Because she didn’t realize she’s used the same “my kid is sick” excuse the time before. I wanted to say “you sure do have a sickly kid, you should get it vaccinated” lol
The "it" was a nice touch.
 

Spaz

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Dumbest poster here? I'm taking upper level science courses and I'm doing very well with them. I get my bachelor's in spring 2020 and then I'm off to grad school. Yeah I'm really stupid, fvck do you do? I tell it like it is. I'm tired of this "handle it like a man" bullsh1t cause it makes no difference. I don't like losing particular girls and I believe I have a right to be fvcking pissed off about it. I don't subscribe to the mindset you're promoting
People are offering solutions to a problem.

U need to offer an alternative solution or give an example on how you remain unfazed after being flaked on.
 

GrowingPains

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Class is in session ya control freaks.
 
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