pyros said:
It is not JUST if you're more ugly or more handsome. One of the most important things the majority of ppl on this thread are missing, is...
YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLE, or more concrete, the GIRL'S SOCIAL CIRCLE.
An HB8 can meet a guy that is an 8 lets say, they talk for 10 mins he gets her number. But, this girl might know a guy which is a 6.5 because they study together. In this scenario, they build rapport, she gets to know him, find some things she likes about him, and she finds him ok looking...
so in the end she ends up with this guy, instead of the hotter one.
Why? because this regular guy had the chance to build a lot of rapport, so he wins.
Many guys think girls behave the same way as them: if this guy is hotter, he should get the HB8 always, instead of this other guy which is a 6.5.
WRONG.
I've seen this same scenario several times.
It is obvious that if this HB8 girl had the chance to get to know this hotter guy in some time...and find some things she likes about him she probably would choose him, but since he is NOT IN HER SOCIAL CIRCLE, bye bye.
This is not a rule, it just happens from time to time, but it happens.
Don't agree with this at all, and I've experienced it many times, too. I've chased after the stereotypical barbie hottie that everyone wanted (and pursued at the same time). They gave pretty much everyone a chance - the bad boy, the player, the hottie, the redneck, the loud-mouth, the ******* / douche bag... some with multiple traits in one... yea, pretty much all bad people. Ha ha.
I usually got to them first - due to looks / infatuation - but pretty much lost it from there. As far as I could tell, their interest was purely physical, and all they talked about was sex. That is, after they got to know me. It was more relationship-focused before I started acting like an ill-tempered jackass. I was, at the time, a loud-mouth, egotistical, conceited, stuck up, shallow *******. It was a no-strings desire on their part.
They were definitely interested, though, prior to all the chaos that ensued after the first... day or so. They still gave me multiple chances, too, even after all this. They also chose and gave the opportunity to me - even breaking up with their BF's or whoever they were dating. All based on looks and personality (ex: strong social skills and conversating ability).
What I've seen is that it doesn't matter how incompatible you are, or how much of a dumbass you are, or if you're part of their social circle. I didn't know any of the *****es who ever came up to me, showed interest, etc, and they came from all different walks.
What does matter is how attractive you are, how you make them feel, and how much game you have. I always killed it in the beginning with any kind of girl - then lost it after. The girls I fared best with were those who I didn't show a lot of interest in (but still acted nice to), held back from, didn't chase after or worship, etc. They went crazy ape**** for that... as well as maintaining mystery, making suggestions of other options (but not bragging or trying to make them jealous).
A lot of girls seem to dig the bad boy / player look, with a "nice" personality, strong sexual appeal, who holds back and presents a challenge, and is desired by other women. If you start acting like an arrogant jackass - they only want sex. If you act like a nice guy wuss chump - they lose respect and interest in you, and don't want to be seen with you. They might enter into a pseudo, private, fall-back type relationship with you, though - if you're "hot" enough.
But there was definitely many guys competing for these girls. And I've seen this happen with other girls, as well. They almost always went for the best looking guy first, and courted him - then went to others if he wasn't up to standard. These are the guys the women approach, as well. They're the #1 focus, and they will be more lenient, give multiple chances to, try to change what they don't like, explain and communicate... they don't just get the brush off. They are and remain interested for some time. They also talk and think about them a LOT. Even though I was pretty much a complete loser at the time - they'd say "the only one I can't forget about is you" every time they or I came back. The same girls who ONLY ever complimented me on looks, and hated everything else (ie, me). They'd also say "I hate you" quite a lot, and wouldn't stop *****ing when our chaotic relationship came to an end.
But anyway... again, these other guys were all different. Some were into the party scene, some were aggressive / loud, some were laid back, some were douche bag players, some were unique / different altogether, and didn't really belong anywhere. The lesser-looking guys with the EXACT same traits and from the EXACT same social circles weren't given these chances - nor were they selected first. I've seen MANY of them get rejected with the same ol' crap lines ("I have a boyfriend") - only to jump to a hotter guy and start showing interest... in the same room!
As well as guys from the girls' social circles... And "hot" girls have HUGE social circles, but most of those guys in them are "friends". They prefer to spread out and date different people, from what I've observed. All part of that unknowing, uncharted territory, freshness, mystery **** they seem to be obsessed with. I was always pretty different from most guys / circles, and fared pretty well. Many women would even say "I can't figure you out; you're attractive and sweet; you're a tough cookie to crack; you're not like most guys", etc. Just made them even more intrigued and interested. Girls have no lives, and like to decipher / analyze and try to figure **** out... as well as causing drama and being retarded. Whatever.
Those are my experiences, anyway.
