I Can't Get ANY Girl

[SXS]

I don't see how or why you couldn't get any girl in the world with what you have based on those photos.

Doesn't work like that. Girls have types of looks that are compatible to them. Regardless of how good you look, you will still be rejected by most girls. Girls also have different standards.

 

[Kbomb]

There is just so much work that needs to be done here I wouldn't even want to start. All I can say is that something in your personality/behavior is giving off a creepy/unattractive vibe. You need to find out what and kill it asap.

 

[HalfPUAHalfAFC]

Leopold,

You gotta do something about your wardrobe first. You are stacked, so you need to wear shirts that are form fitting. You are hiding your body, which is fit and will give off a decent vibe to the chicks if it is not hidden in clothes that are too baggy. Try some tight black/white/grey t-****s, plus some good fitting jackets and jeans.

Also, your hair. Frankly, it sucks. It looks like it was cut by a dweeb barber who has no clue what the babes like.

Schwank,

Didn't see a picture of you, but from what you wrote, it sounds like half of your problem is appearance and body language. Learn to dress nice, get a solid haircut, and hold yourself well. Walk with chin up, shoulders back. The only reason women would laugh at you just walking down the street is that you look somewhere between dorky and skeevy.

If you don't have a social circle, then that suggests your social skills suck. This is also demonstrated by lack of day2 outings with online dates. Can you hold a conversation? Having good stories to tell? Always make sure to lead conversation and most of it should be about her. Can you look a woman in the eye without getting nervous? You gotta be able to that, AT MINIMUM. Learn some new skills, read habitually, and become interesting. That's what no woman are interested because you are not interesting.

Add in your bitterness and awkwardness, no wonder they flee from you.

Man up and get to work. It can be done, brother!

 

[Leopold]

There is just so much work that needs to be done here I wouldn't even want to start. All I can say is that something in your personality/behavior is giving off a creepy/unattractive vibe. You need to find out what and kill it asap.

Like what?

People who know me don't find me creepy at all. I do admit and not your average Joe and I would consider myself unusual in an unique way but that's the whole point right? Standing out of the crowd.

I need to know what is it because i keep hearing "you are weird/creepy, fix it" and I cant seen to understand what is it that I have to fix.

That's why I'm going to a therapist to see if he can help me out.

 

[pdx1138]

Doesn't work like that. Girls have types of looks that are compatible to them. Regardless of how good you look, you will still be rejected by most girls. Girls also have different standards.

Yes, but there are PLENTY that would go for him the way he is. Your statement doesn't exactly hold water though,
I've seen LOADS of ugly dudes with very hot women.

I'll be the first to admit Leopold is notches above me in most respects and I've had my fair share of women.

And Leopold, getting bulkier isn't going to improve your success with women, you actually already have the
physique most of them appreciate/ are looking for. Ripped with some bulk.

You have a sort of Anthony Kiedis / Dave Navarro look going and thats good!

Getting a new hairdo and form fitting clothing would go a long way.

Do you maintain eye contact with them?

 

[Leopold]

You have an impressive body (no homo) bro. Your looks aren't your problem.

You're in a similar situation to where I was a few years back except I was quite good looking but not really as aware of it as you are (or I currently am).

I actually get girls (and guys) telling me I'm hot. Guys aren't as direct. They normally throw a 'you must get a lot of ladies' type comments, mostly since I get compared to Floyd Mayweather on random nights out.

Focus on learning game and I say this without meaning any disrespect but there is a different kind of game required for good looking guys compared to average looking guys. A lot of the advice on this forum is geared towards the latter in order to get AFCs out their shells and approaching.

But you have to be less direct (read aggressive) when you first start the interaction. Think Pook talks about this.

Girls will automatically assume you're a player and get defensive. It took me about a year to find the right balance. Don't be ****y too quickly. Playful indifference is the way to go. You need to convey that you aren't completely stuck on yourself and then start running game.

If you're an 8 or above in looks, as a guy, you will find at least a HB 6/7 willing to f*ck you with little to no effort, on your part, provided you don't mess up the interaction.

Most good looking guys who struggle do so because their insecure (and they show it through their actions), pedastalise chicks or are complete social lepers . Work on your inner game and social skills and everything else will fall into place brother.

Umm, this actually sounds very helpful and it relates to me.

I wasn't fully aware the game changed if you were attractive. What part of the Book of Pook do you mean in specific?

Oh and yes, I do get so many complements on a daily basis (sometimes I have to like roll my eyes and be like... this again).

I totally get what you mean that people become defensive because they think you are a player. It totally happens to me specially on my workplace. I get so much respect from all the co workers and ladies there; I truly believe they see me as a player. Irony is that I really get none. Only reason I don't do anything there is because workplace is SACRED and I'm not going to risk my reputation for a chance of getting laid. Been there, done that, not doing it.

Oh and about the wardrobe guys... I wear tight clothes and you can definitively see my figure. It just happens I took old pictures out because I'm changed lighter color clothes and I just need to take better pictures.

My hair? Again, I get so many complements about it... Recently I started to comb it sideways so its not down my forehead like emo like. My hair is a combination of short/long hair and is extremely stylish so I don't think that's the problem. It's kind of like the german nazi haircut from WWll

Like this but without using gel or hair products.

http://i.imgur.com/9LLna.jpg

 

[FortunaFides]

Schwank,

There are only two kinds of problems--problems of perception and problems that are reality based. How do you KNOW these girls were laughing at YOU?

If they really work laughing at you, you must have done something, but there's a good chance they didn't even notice you.

I was kinda in your place about 6 years ago-- few friends, no girls I hung out with, and the problem was me. No self confidence and crippling social anxiety.

It shouldn't matter to you when the last time you had a girlfriend was, you have to work on and built yourself up first. That's the first step.

 

[Leopold]

I understand all the comments about more muscle doesn't going to make much of a difference. But guys, think about it... more attractive means less % of rejection or more probability of forgiveness If a mistake is done.

I'm just doing it pretty much to feel good about myself besides to get attention from the counter sex.



I really think I'm just going to give up for now and go ghost. I really need to get offline.

I'll keep working out, attend to a therapist, re read Pook's book and the bible again, and stay productive. Just keep improving myself in general like when I discovered this site. I'll just forget about girls for now.

I'll see you guys again on 3-4 months or so with better pictures for another comeback.

 

[SXS]

Yes, but there are PLENTY that would go for him the way he is. Your statement doesn't exactly hold water though,
I've seen LOADS of ugly dudes with very hot women.

I'm not talking about lv of attractiviness, I'm talking about types of looks. Women have types of looks they are attracted too.

I'll keep working out, attend to a therapist, re read Pook's book and the bible again, and stay productive. Just keep improving myself in general like when I discovered this site. I'll just forget about girls for now.

I think you should keep trying instead of trying to improve yourself. Being out there matters more, trust me.
I also noticed this:

I have a positive and outgoing personality and yeah I can be clumsy sometimes lol but I learn from it. I usually very smooth. I just hate when girls I fancy never pay attention to me and think THEY are BETTER than me? Fvcking slvts!

You don't chose the girl, the girl choses you. As a man, you should learn to go with the girls that likes you and show interest. Never think too much about a certain particular girl, it can give you a headache. also, if you stay with girls you don't care much about, you learn to develop a don't care attitude.

 

[foreverAFC]

i have a similar problem, i dont feel like im doing anything wrong but i give out bad vibes left and right. however, ive stopped obsessing over it and ive come to fully embrace it. sure all of the women at work see me as a creep or a weirdo, but thats ok cause im a manly rugged rebel in my own mind. at least im real.

in fact these types of people are usually cooler than the average person, and they are the people who have been most memorable in my experience. for example there was one guy i would see at the gym who would wear slacks, dress shoes, and an undershirt every single time i saw him lifting, and he had long hippie type hair that was wild. he looked so odd and out of place, and yet i admired him for being so different and not caring what others thought.

 

[floydb25]

Doesn't work like that. Girls have types of looks that are compatible to them. Regardless of how good you look, you will still be rejected by most girls. Girls also have different standards.

THIS. I dont think certain people - in their black and white thinking - realize that EVERYONE is an individual with different tastes, standards, personalities, etc. There's so many different variables at play.

I've had girls reject me for being too pretty, nice, short, shy, etc - while others thought I was the best thing ever. Some girls said I wasnt exciting enough; others thought I was hilarious and sexy. Same with friends I had. Some women thought I was better looking than them, or vice versa. You just never know, and you CAN'T attract them all. One girl will call you pretty, gorgeous, hot, etc, and be all smiles around you; acting nice; being all touchy feely... Then the next could ignore or laugh at you, say youre just friends, treat you like a crap, not want to date you, never compliment you, etc.

The "high class", stuck up, fake *****es are reknowned for doing both (ie, worship you when theyre interested - then treat you like complete garbage once its lost). Hence, why you get in and out, or avoid them altogether. Theyre dumb, fickle, and shallow, have no minds of their own, and not worth stressing over.

Because everyone is different - you CANNOT take rejection personally, or care what other people think. Youre not friends with, or get along with everybody, and you're not going to attract everybody, either. Nor do you need to. Everybody also has an opinion, but NONE of them matter.

*****es tend to be loud, rude obnoxious, mean, and think they know everything, and speak for everyone. Their opinion means jack ****. Dont listen to their criticisms and insults. Theyre just miserable, worthless, and dump their insecurities onto others. They also try abusing people to keep them dependant on them. Also, trying to one-up everybody to feel better about their useless existance. Avoid. Take nothing they say to heart, or anyone who is otherwise against you. To that end: do NOT seek the approval of, or depend on others to determine your worth. You wont get it, and most will bring you down.

One thing you should have is sufficient self-esteem, so as to not focus only on the negatives / failures / rejections; taking everything so personally; being desperate and settling for anything (including scraps); feeling unworthy; or falling prey to an abuser. Bad times.

All that aside: if you are "very"good looking - you should still have a solid success rate - with lots of opportunities, and little effort. So, I disagree with that part. You wont attract them all, but you will attract a lot. Good looking ones, too. Though, they still remain stupid and stuck up. Hehehaha. :nono:

 

[HeadLightsOn]

My goal is to look like a model.

Don't take this the wrong way - but having a goal to 'look like a model' is not really where you should be headed. Of course if you personally - for some unknown reason - really DO want to base your looks on those of a model - go for it.

I know you guys are a few years younger than me, but when I was in my 20's here's what helped me:

- Improve your wardrobe.

That means really NICE shoes NOT sneakers, recent and fashionable trousers/jeans and good quality tops and shirts that suit your body type, NOT the current fashion trend (you've all laughed at women that wear micro crop tops with a foul layer of fat hanging out?).

- Get a great hairstyle.

It stuns me that a lot of guys won't get a cool haircut that again - SUITS there looks, not just a copy out of a fashion magazine. If your thinning/receding/bald, ok. Ever seen young bald guys out with hotties? Of course you have. Wear it proud. Which brings me onto:

- Increase your confidence level.

Yes yes. So easy to say this right? I recall sometimes how difficult it was to get a level of confidence as a younger guy that enabled me to

naturally

seek out and close deals on good looking women, or even up my date ration.

I read up on a lot of different topics (don't laugh). I watched and mimicked more mature guys who had good game. I told myself "that beautiful girl over there is just another person. She sits down to crap. I'm going to say hi, tell her my name and talk about HER. If I fail, I'll try again. Here goes..."

- Go out.

A lot. Smile. A lot. Be friendly. Be interested in the people around you and ENGAGE THEM. Be the best man you can be in the room - without coming across as a ****y arrogant a'hole. People WILL warm to you. I'm telling you, this is so true.

- Develop a layer of some 'thick skin' but remain in a good state of mind.

I didn't always win every situation. So if I had a fail, I would simply get back up and keep going. But I met SO MANY people. That increases your social circle. You don't have to become best buddies in a heartbeat, but when people come to like you, they will want to hang with you. Simple.

- Regardless of your looks (yes they do count to a degree), you have other weapons at your disposal.

Charm. Wit. Interest in what another person is saying. Inquisitive. Warm. Pos-i-tive attitude.

I know this is just a brief rundown, and it may not be to everyones taste, but perhaps it gives some helpful advice to some of the younger guys out there.

FWIW I have actually been involved in the fashion industry, have rubbed shoulders with all types of women and have had my fair share of ups and downs.

But I wouldn't be dead for quids :box:

Let me know if you want me to post any other info or feel free to ask any Q and As...

 

[floydb25]

Hmmm... Missed that "model" part. I dont think you can look like a model. Either it's there, or not. And by that, I mean the face. If you can attract a lot of good looking women with JUST that - then you have "model looks". Most guys who attract a lot of women with just their looks tend to have the mindset of "I should be a model" - as opposed to "I want to look like a model". But they were all annoying queers, anyway. Not unlike all the retarded / conceited pretty girls out there. So glad I ditched that whole crowd. Losers.

No matter what anyone says - the face is the most important part when it comes to physical attraction. Ive seen and experienced it too many times. If you're talking model status, then definitely, the face must be way up there. But I'm not a modeling agent, so **** off.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Some of you guys are waaay overboard on looks, even though they matter to a degree for initial attraction.

What makes you exciting? What hobbies and activities light you up when you talk about them.

My guess is there are none.

To be interesting, you need to make yourself interesting by involving yourself in activites with passsion.

OP, are you a sad sack, all serious when you're with women?

 

[backbreaker]

your pboelm si very simple OP. you expect ***** to fall in your lap. you got to go get it.

you haven't gotten to the point where you want to get laid more than you want to not be rejected.

reading your post you are a buffer king; POF, watching for dead obvious attraction form a girl before you think about making a move.

if it hurts that bad not getting any, the ONLY way you are going to change it is to go out in the war zone, get some shots fired at you and figure the **** out. actually talk and approach women and the more you do the clearer the feedback will be. instead of theorizing on what your issue is, figure out what it is.


it has nothing to do with his wadrobe, his look or any of this ****. it might not be perfect but it's not bad enough to not get ANY girl interested. if he could talk to women and had a good outlook on life and wasn't a creeper some woman would jump in the sack wtih him. I see guys much worse than htat get pretty decent tail. the probeln is that he doesn't want to be rejected, which ironically enough, keeps getting him rejected.

 

[sharkbeat]

My intuition is that first, you guys need friends if you haven't had some. Friends that you actually hang out with to talk nonsenses, not coworkers or pilate/yoga groups.

If you can't find friends, then you need to find people who also don't have friends and start hanging out! You are all on the same boat, might as well sail together.

Then pursue your hobbies, tag your new friends along if they are interested.

Find hookers when you become sexually frustrated and there's still no women around. I'm against prostitutes, but if it's been four ****ing years, then I'm sorry, pay some services! You need that vaginal massages once in a while. Just don't make that a habit.

When you don't have friends for so long, you will become socially unadjusted, and no men/women (especially women) would want to hang around you. This stuff shows in your body language, btw. The way you walk, carry yourself, talk, see, response, and all that shows how emotionally healthy you are.

It's a ****ty downward spiral, but you gotta put some effort to put the brakes on. Otherwise it will continue to roll downward.

 

[YoungStunna]

One of my best friends growing up was a 320 pound Asian guy that looked nothing like a model!

He was funny as ****!
Was an awesome cook
He always had this indifferent dont give a **** attitude

And I would have never believed it if I didn't see it, but i HAVE seen a married, slim, good looking brunette hb 7 sweating his balls, blowin up his phone that he ended up banging.
Also, two sexy 21 years old co workers of his ( one blonde hb8, and another light skinned black girl hb7 that he had ONS with.

 

[Atom Smasher]

I understand all the comments about more muscle doesn't going to make much of a difference. But guys, think about it... more attractive means less % of rejection or more probability of forgiveness If a mistake is done.

I'm just doing it pretty much to feel good about myself besides to get attention from the counter sex.



I really think I'm just going to give up for now and go ghost. I really need to get offline.

I'll keep working out, attend to a therapist, re read Pook's book and the bible again, and stay productive. Just keep improving myself in general like when I discovered this site. I'll just forget about girls for now.

I'll see you guys again on 3-4 months or so with better pictures for another comeback.

Aren't you that guy who was frequenting that little kid drill seargent's site? I forget the name of it. Hasn't that helped you? You don't sound like you're espousing those philosophies.

 

[Fly By Night]

I know a 280 pounder that smelled like sh!t all the time, but he still bagged himself a gf (she was a 5 at best) then dumped her for a HB7 a few months afterwards. This guy was a cool ass dude though, crazy witty and wasn't insecure about a damn thing. He would go out of his way to compliment other guys on what they were wearing in front of girls.

Your clothes are not going to get the woman for you. Your muscles are not going to get the woman for you. While they can help, it comes down to your confidence to get them. If you tell yourself that girls DO NOT want you... well google "self-fulfilling prophecy".

 

[Schwank]

Schwank,

There are only two kinds of problems--problems of perception and problems that are reality based. How do you KNOW these girls were laughing at YOU?

If they really work laughing at you, you must have done something, but there's a good chance they didn't even notice you.

I was kinda in your place about 6 years ago-- few friends, no girls I hung out with, and the problem was me. No self confidence and crippling social anxiety.

It shouldn't matter to you when the last time you had a girlfriend was, you have to work on and built yourself up first. That's the first step.

When they're approaching my way with a huge grin on their faces and when they're past me they start laughing and whispering to the person with whom they're walking. It happens too often to be coincidental, so it's reality.

It's hard to build self-confidence when people -- especially females -- are putting you down every day. It's hard NOT to feel angry about that.