"I can see you between 5 & 5.45pm...."

[JohnnyStorm]

"During which time I'll be feeling guilty for not doing uni work"

Thats the text I got....Now, this girl is actually quite busy as she's working and doing a masters degree...but surely if she wanted to see me she'd make the effort right?

Then she said, "Don't say I don't try to arrange meeting up"...which almost sounded serious?
Surely no one could believe that is an offer worth taking up right?!
Am I right to be offended by such a tragic suggestion?

 

[backseatjuan]

No man. Go see the girl. Drink and coffee or something and leave early. Wait for her to contact you first. You gotta raise her IL a bit.

 

[Gro0ver]

Part time lover at best. Spin more plates.

 

[r0cky]

Yeah thats a tad offensive. But you can never tell emotions through text so theres a chance she was joking. And sometimes people say things over text that wouldnt ever say in person. If you ask me I think this girl might be a little socially akward.

 

[st_99]

look at it this way... if a girl showed she had interest in you and asked you if you wanted to hang out and do something, do you think an appropriate response would be "I can see you between 5 & 5.45pm"??

Would you expect her to say "have a nice life"

I would.


but as rocky said its possible that texts come across as really bad but are perhaps misinterpreted, it happens.

 

[JohnnyStorm]

Thanks for the replies. I think she's terrified of any kind of intimacy, real or perceived, as shes said most of her relationships have mainly just been F-buddies, but I don't actually think she's a slvt if you get me.

I'll see her again in the future so I want to keep this open as an option, but I definitely feel it's best to leave it up to her to contact me & get on with living my life and being awesome. Good idea?

 

[Poonani Maker]

When you meet up with her, tell she seems "stressed" from all the studying and to "relax." Tell her that you think she's beautiful. Then start touching her. Then kiss. You know what to do from here.

 

[Eternal_water]

Mate I'm in my final year of Uni and the workload is simply ridicoulous, of course some courses are harder than others and I am doing Biochemistry. But I could not imagine doing a masters, it would be far too intense for me.

Not only is she suggesting a time for you too meet up (I wish some girl would do that for me) she is taking time out of a masters timetable to do so.

And you don't simply make time on a masters

 

[JohnnyStorm]

Mate I'm in my final year of Uni and the workload is simply ridicoulous, of course some courses are harder than others and I am doing Biochemistry. But I could not imagine doing a masters, it would be far too intense for me.

Not only is she suggesting a time for you too meet up (I wish some girl would do that for me) she is taking time out of a masters timetable to do so.

And you don't simply make time on a masters

I see your point. However, she's out all the time with her mates, going cinema, seeing bands etc.
My naive assumption was perhaps that if she's able to do those things, then she's able to see me....How can I attempt to increase her IL in me without appearing desperate?

 

[OnTheWayUp]

Yeah thats a tad offensive. But you can never tell emotions through text so theres a chance she was joking. And sometimes people say things over text that wouldnt ever say in person. If you ask me I think this girl might be a little socially akward.

+1. This rings true for me, OP. Specifying the exact time limits between which you guys are going to meet in the way she does comes across a bit weird.

Give her the benefit of the doubt and meet up with her. As other people have said, she does legitimately have a lot of work atm. This might be her way of seeing you as soon as she can. You'll know after speaking to her for a few minutes whether she's interested in you sexually or not. Personally I wouldn't make a move over coffee during the daytime when you've only got 45 mins to build rapport; I think that's setting you up to fail. See if you can pique her interest with banter and flirting, and you may well get a second date. If she subsequently agrees to meet with you in the evening, that's your cue to make a move.

Finally, OP, the tone of your messages makes it clear that you're looking at this girl as one of many potential offers- this is a very good thing.

 

[MisterD]

am i the only one that has a problem with this??

 this girl gave him a 45 minute window, told him she'd be feeling guilty for doing so, and then told him don't act like she doesn't try to arrange meetings 

she's offering him table scraps. don't accept table scraps

i would tell her to text me when you have more time and i would move on

i'm in college myself and yes somedays it's time consuming and you're busy, but like you said, she's able to hang out with friends and whatnot

how to increase her interest level? don't accept her table scraps. in my opinion the 45 minute window was a slap in the face. i think "hey it's better than nothing" is the wrong attitude to have in this case. 

i would reschedule when she's more available. if she's not down with that then you know where you stand

you know during those 45 minutes half of her attention will be focused on you and the other half will be focused on looking at her phone to check the time. you can't build attraction like that, especially when she said she's gonna be feeling guilty about not using her time to do something else. how much good can possibly come from meeting up with her under those circumstances

 

[st_99]

how to increase her interest level? don't accept her table scraps.

to your point, isnt this an automatic setup to fail unless you run serious game. if im a girl, im thinking, damn, im basically saying to this guy you got 5 minutes to wow me and he still shows up like a hungry puppy dog.

yeah, not good.

 

[Krueg]

Women should take the Mans lead on a date. Not the other way around. Tell her you are busy and make a counter-offer date. She has to meet your needs. She has to be crazy about you!

 

[Tiguere]

if you decline make sure you will be using that time wisely. otherwise i suggest you to go meet her at her available time. we all have to start from scratch.

use those 45mins to woo her in. rob her a kiss also somewhere during those 45mins. be a man. stop listening to these little b!tch3s saying oh reject her scraps.

go meet her .

 

[Yo'Mama]

Tell her that 45 mins is all you need but she should bring lube and not expect any foreplay.

 

[TonyBaloney]

Oh for f ucks sake, this post tops the bloody lot.....is this really what its come too???? KIN hell, just use that b itch for a couple of squirts - its possibly the most insulting behaviour that ive ever heard.

If it was me, i'd tell her to jog on.......

 

[Who Dares Win]

I had a similar situation, just remember that girls take their decision based on the emotion of the moment.
Therefore if you meet her with the plan of staying toghter for only few minutes but you manage to turn her on and being a little bit dominant on her, you can have her for more.

It happened the same thing to me, except that I convinced her to keep staying with some bvllsh1t about the importance of rest to be productive as a evident reason while in fact I just helped her to rationalize the fact that she was enjoying and wanted to stay more so I helped her to bvllsh1t herself.
Kino will help, and if you decide to stick to this plan make sure to avoid any logical topic and keep it emotional, give her something that will occupy her mind even strong emotion will do.

If you try but you see you cannot handle it do as backseatjuan suggested, leave early and let her Il grow, I think this is the plan that give you the best odds of success.

 

[Atom Smasher]

am i the only one that has a problem with this??

 this girl gave him a 45 minute window, told him she'd be feeling guilty for doing so, and then told him don't act like she doesn't try to arrange meetings 

she's offering him table scraps. don't accept table scraps

i would tell her to text me when you have more time and i would move on

i'm in college myself and yes somedays it's time consuming and you're busy, but like you said, she's able to hang out with friends and whatnot

how to increase her interest level? don't accept her table scraps. in my opinion the 45 minute window was a slap in the face. i think "hey it's better than nothing" is the wrong attitude to have in this case. 

i would reschedule when she's more available. if she's not down with that then you know where you stand

you know during those 45 minutes half of her attention will be focused on you and the other half will be focused on looking at her phone to check the time. you can't build attraction like that, especially when she said she's gonna be feeling guilty about not using her time to do something else. how much good can possibly come from meeting up with her under those circumstances

MisterD wins the prize for insight in my book. I personally would tell her I just lost interest and then move on.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Tell her that 45 mins is all you need but she should bring lube and not expect any foreplay.

LOL, good one, Yo'Mama. I needed a good laugh tonight and you delivered.

 

[ArcBound]

Well tell us more, do you feel like she is interested and genuinely has work or what?

On the chance that she actually does have a lot of work I dunno if its a good idea to see her. I'd just flake on her, text her "looks like you got a lot of work let's do this another time it doesn't make sense to go out while worrying about schoolwork"

You can go if you want but you'd better make an impression on a day where she is not constrained thinking about schoolwork and then going back to do work after her date, completing drowning you out.