i can get dates with girls, keeping em interested is hard

joe45

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heres the problem , been meeting a couple of gals off the net myspace , okcupid, went out, the longest being 2 months and that was only once a wk, with all 5 of em they all tell me-no connection , no chemistry.
ok what is with this? any guys here have this problem before, and how many gals do u have to date before finding thr real right gf.

do u think its my lack of experience with girls, 25 with dating and girl experience of a 15 yr old.
i mean i can get a date ,but keeping em and getting em interested or for long is like -they have no interest mostly after the 2nd date.i mean i don;t think i did anything wrong- i don't swear, didn't burp or fart, didn't talk about sex, just alll and all casual small talk like school, work , hobbies and what not she and i are interested in.

any comments
 

wayword

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joe45 said:
didn't talk about sex, just alll and all casual small talk like school, work , hobbies and what not she and i are interested in.
Wow, I think that's your problem right thurr...you avoid talking about intimacy and absolutely anything of substance. Just small talk. For 2 months? Lol...I don't blame 'em.
 

Scorched

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flirt

Maybe you should flirt more, touch more, smile more, be witty, make eye contact, but let her make more... eh I could go on and on...

When meeting girls off myspace, I usually give them a "friend" hug, on the begining and end of date. Then 2nd date I usually walk around with the girl and talk to her... Maybe touch her back and point her in which way to go. If she gives a crap hug, tell her and ask for a 2nd hug.

Keep the ball in your court!

Good Luck
 

milrenkb

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Scorched said:
Maybe you should flirt more, touch more, smile more, be witty, make eye contact, but let her make more... eh I could go on and on...
One thing you might want to do is think of topics that girls like to talk about with guys. For example talking about makeup runs the risk of making you look a little gay, but talking about how your guy friend wears makeup and thinks nothing of it can lead to some "stimulating converstation."

My advice is to make a list of intresting topics. Mines is up to well over a
hundred topics. Heres some examples from my list.

1. the trend of older
women dating younger men,

2. WORST NAME FOR BOY OR GIRL

3. PET PEEVES

4. WHO CHEATS MORE MEN OR WOMEN

5. Jessica Simpson (dumb or smart)

Also heres a post I made from another thread that might be some use to you.

--------------------------
Look in most sets your going to have to do 90% of the talking at the beginning of the interaction. The basic rules of good converstation are as follows.

1. Focus on making statements instead of asking questions: Notice how when you talk to your friends you make more statements than questions. This concept is extremly important.

2. Only ask questions when you are genuinely intrested in something: Constantly asking questions usually comes off as approval seeking. To some people its like nails on a chalkboard. However if a question comes from a genuine place of curriousity you'll usually be met with a quality response.

3. If you do ask a question try to make it open ended: I don't need to explain this one.

4. Don't laugh at your own jokes: Now I'm not the funniest guy in the world however I am very capable of making people laugh (BTW: I would never tell this to a girl). Not laughing at your own jokes does two things
1. It creates a moment of tension that usually generates a more powerful response
2. It gives you a way out if you tell a bad joke because if it goes unnoticed than its just assumed to be part of the converstation.
On the flip side if you can't help but laugh than let it go (not to much though). This is okay because you'll release an actual laugh instead of an approval seeking nervous laugh.

5. Don't look for peoples reactions, notice them: The best example is when you shoot a neg or a C&F line. Looking for a reaction negates the line and therefore makes you look like an idiot. At the same time pay attention to how people are conducting themselves, just don't do it in an obvious way.

6. 'Smile like you mean it': Trying to look to serious makes you look creepy. Forcing a smile makes you look approval seeking. The best time to smile is when something pleases you, like when a girl tells you something intresting. However when in doubt its better to smile.

7. Don't brag: Girls like it better if they learn about you on there own. Telling a girl you have a porche is not nearly as effective as taking her for a ride. However you can still convey high value by telling a good story.

8. 'The power is in the audience': Try to avoid performing. If you can get a girl to perform for you then she'll become more invested in the interaction. If you do perform than try to do it in a way that also encourages her to perform for you. For example, if you do a good impersination and the girl tells you to do it again, use a kino compliance test (such as the spin move). Don't become the dancing monkey.

9. Listen: You can't rely on canned material forever. Listening will help you find material to carry on a good converstation.

10. Multiple threads: This is super important. Good converstations consists of multiple topics. If you can only revert to one converstational thread than people will become board.

11. Don't revisit threads: If you were on a thread that got cut off, don't go back to it. Doing so is try hard. If a girl wants to know she'll ask.

12. Kino: When I first got into this game I was constantly reminded of the importance of kino. Once you learn to calibrate you will become unstoppable. If your unsure of this then try the following: think of a time when someone gave you a pat on the back. More times than not it probably made you feel a little more relaxed.

Also, one mistake guys make is that they use kino escalation after they strike a chord with a women. Subconciously this makes no sense to a women. If you do kino escalation after a women strikes a chord with you then you'll get a much better reaction.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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wayword said:
Wow, I think that's your problem right thurr...you avoid talking about intimacy and absolutely anything of substance. Just small talk. For 2 months? Lol...I don't blame 'em.
I agree. It's surprising that they hung around that long. I guess it's true that women feel that they can never have too many friends.
 
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